Madness
by jackpittgregor
Summary: This is an RP that I wrote with TheWidowNatasha on tumblr. Summary - In an alternate ending to the movie Avengers - Loki win's the battle against the superhero's and becomes ruler of Midgard. One sleepless night he decided to visit the Black Widow in her cell.
1. Chapter 1

Loki stood along the balcony with his hands resting firmly against the rails as he gazed down at his kingdom. It was only a small portion of his empire that was laid out before him. This entire realm was his. He was the ruler of Midgard. Its sole King. He finally had everything that he wanted. He had accomplished everything that he had set out to do.

He could have chosen anywhere on this planet to build his palace but there was never a question that he would select this city. After all, this was where the Mighty Avenger's had tried so hard to stop him and failed so miserably. Yes, there was never any doubt that New York would be chosen for this grand Fortress where he stood.

Loki ruled his new dominion with a firm hand. His Chitauri armies made certain that the rabble stayed in line but they weren't his only supporters. It wasn't long before the mindless little human's stepped in line. Most of them just wanted to go on about their lives as simply as they could so they gladly accepted his authority. And those few that still had the taste for rebellion, well; he had his ways of taking care of them.

His world was perfect or at least he should have felt like it was but Loki found himself still unsatisfied. He was still plagued by his inability to sleep. A condition that had come upon him after his discovery of Odin's little secret. That was when the thoughts of his true heritage began haunting his mind. In the darkness of night was when it was at its worse and sometimes it drove him near madness. This was one of those such nights.

His dark green eyes observed the city lights below him and the twinkling stars that lingered above. The god had everything and yet he felt there was something missing. He felt hollow and quite frankly, he felt bored. He needed something to stimulate him, to intrigue him, something that could get his mind off these melancholy thoughts that always haunted him in the midnight hours.

His gaze flickered to the traffic lights in the distance as they turned from yellow to red. Red, that color always made him think of her. Loki's eyes narrowed at the reflection. The red-headed woman had been a thorn in his side. So unflappable and defiant even to the last moment when they were defeated. She had tricked him once and he found himself thinking of that moment often. She was clever. He had to give her that and manipulative much like himself.

An unexpected idea sparked in his mind and a devilish smile descended over the young god's features. He suddenly decided that he had a much better way to pass the time during these sleepless hours. He turned swiftly to the guard who was standing a few feet away awaiting his next orders.

"Go ahead and tell the warden that I am coming down into the dungeons. Prepare a seat outside the Black Widow's cell," He grinned maliciously. "I wish to speak with her."

Natasha sat in the middle of the cold cell, her legs firmly tucked beneath her. They'd fought long and hard, but they had failed. The Chitauri invaders rounded up the Avengers and imprisoned them. Loki had been sinister enough to provide cells that were almost exact replicas of the holding cell he'd been kept in on the Helicarrier…

Oh, the bitter irony.

They'd taken special care to split the team up, but as far as she knew, she was the only one in isolation. It appeared that Steve and Clint were paired up elsewhere, and Tony and Bruce were in another cell.

Loki had wisely fitted Banner with a suppression collar that would help keep the "other guy" at bay. Natasha didn't understand why, out of all of her teammates, she was the one Loki chose to isolate, but she was stripped of her weapons…and her cat suit.

She remembered preparing herself for the worse as they snatched her out of the restrictive clothing, but all they did after getting her in her underwear was shove her into the cell.

Now, she sat alone in a pair of dark green satin underwear in the middle of the cold, glass cell when he walked in. She met his dark green gaze head-on.

"I knew you'd come", she said stoically.

"Did you, Agent Romanoff," Loki smirked as he strutted forward so that he was only a foot from the glass. "Or should I even call you that now that your precious SHIELD has been snuffed out of existence." His emerald eyes couldn't help but take in the sight of her body.

He had not been down here since he had commanded his soldiers to take the battered Avengers into the dungeons. He had told them to strip the prisoners of anything belonging to SHIELD. He had meant weapons and other paraphernalia. But obviously, the Chitauri had taken his words to include uniforms as well. Not that the young god was complaining.

She was even more gorgeous than he had imagined she would be under all that black leather. He raised his eyebrow as he took in the color of her lacy bra and panties. It was almost as if she had picked the garment for him.

He licked his lips subconsciously as his dark green eyes perused the creamy alabaster skin that was laid out before him. The pert breasts moving up and down beneath the delicate fabric with each intake of her breath seemed to demand his attention. Although her slender waist and luscious thighs were also begging to be noticed.

Loki shook his head slightly as he realized that he had stopped speaking. He was annoyed that he allowed this mere mortals assets to captivate him so completely. He focused his gaze into her dark blue eyes. "The infamous Black Widow. It turns out that you are no more than a tiny little spider that I can crush under my boot whenever I choose."

He tilted his head as he watched the soldier enter the hall with the chair that he had requested. He waited for him to set it down and leave before he continued speaking. The young god moved the chair closer as he sat down in front of the glass. "So tell me, little spider, how does it feel to be on that side of this cage?"

Natasha noticed the way he stared at her, and was honestly surprised by his reaction to her. Regular men were easy targets, but she never imagined the God of Mischief, who was born and raised in a realm where every woman was literally a goddess, would look at her the way he just had.

She remained still as his gaze greedily raked over her curves, forcing herself to remain calm and still under his intense stare.

"You know exactly how it feels…why ask me pointless questions?" She smirked bitterly and rolled her eyes, "Come on, Loki. Surely, you can do better than that for your opening act."

She stood up and sauntered closer to the glass, "You're either here for one of two reasons…you either want to torture me, or you just want to have the satisfaction of seeing me on the other side of the glass. Which is it?"

"Perhaps a little of both," Loki mused with a devilish grin. His eyes followed the movement of her legs as she closed the distance between them. He paused for a moment at the apex of her thighs covered so temptingly by the thin satin fabric before he raised his emerald gaze languidly back up to her eyes.

"Or perhaps I will have one of your former friends torture you for me," the young god taunted in his silky accent. "Have you missed the cold blue gaze of your lover? Maybe I should arrange a meeting for you."

Natasha's stomach dropped. The fact that he could turn any of her teammates against her was probably the most frightening aspect of Loki's powers. Barton especially.

She crossed her arms across her chest and forced herself to lock away her fears as her face remained steady and unwavering in the face of his threats.

"If you wanted Barton in here, he would have been in here by now. If you were really interested in my torture or killing me, I know I would be long dead. This is like a game of cat and mouse for you…no…you won't kill me until you've had your fun…"

She saw the way his eyes once again raked over her body and surmised exactly what type of "fun" he might have in mind.

Loki knew that the thought of one of her comrades being turned once more into his pawn had to frighten her at least a little yet she showed no sign of it at all. She was defiant as ever. Never failing in her unwavering retorts at his words. There must be some way to get under this woman's skin. To truly ruffle that calm exterior that she held onto so tightly. The exterior that he couldn't seem to keep his eyes from appreciating.

'Fun,' he mused to himself. He couldn't recall the last time that he experienced anything that he would consider even remotely fun. His life had become a series of monotonous drudgery. Perhaps, that was why he had trouble sleeping. He moved through the day in a near sleep form the tedium of his existence.

"Interesting choice of words, little spider," the young god smirked. "Tell me what do you suggest I do with you for fun?"

"Take up bowling. Cross stitch…oh, I know…join a book club…but I think if they picked a book you didn't like, you'd kill them", she said mockingly.

Natasha turned around and walked toward the cot on the opposite edge of the room, letting him have his eyeful of her back side.

Loki watched the sway of her hips as she moved away from him. His thoughts becoming decidedly more erotic with each step that she took. She turned slowly before easing herself down on the small cot. A purposeful movement on her part, he knew. She was the Black Widow, after all. Trained to use her wiles on men. The fact of that didn't bother him. It was the fact that her motions had an effect on him that ignited his ire.

"Now, now, little spider," Loki rasped with the slightest edge to his voice. "I know you understood my question better than that. What should YOU and I do for fun?"

Natasha glared at him as she sat down, crossing her legs. She laughed, but there was little humor behind it.

"I doubt any activity I could dream up involving you, me and fun would be safe", she remarked as she leaned back on the bed. "You deem yourself above me. Certainly my idea of fun would be thought of as primitive and unworthy of a god."

"And yet I'm curious," Loki mused as he watched her cross those deliciously slender legs. A mere mortal shouldn't possess such beauty or such sensuality. She made the goddesses of Asgard seem like hags. "Let us see if you are right, little spider, tell me one idea of yours for how the two of us could pass the time and have… fun."

"I could kick your ass at Scrabble…or Poker. Once you learned the rules and vowed not to cheat, that is. But I doubt I'd get an honest game out of the god of lies", she said, grinning mischievously as she lay on her side, idly running a finger over the curve of her hip and watching as his eyes followed it.

Natasha was playing with him now. For whatever reason, she got some satisfaction over knowing that she had an effect on him…but the fact remained, he was the enemy. He was evil and he was holding her friends and teammates hostage.

"You know, I would like some clothes…and a hot bath. This cold shower isn't cutting it."

"You are hardly in a position to make demands, little spider," He stated wryly, the corner of his mouth upturned in the slightest of smiles. "Kick my ass? Is that what you think? Tell me which one of these games is the quickest to learn?" His dark green eyes lingered along the swell of her breasts as she lied there provocatively. Her sapphire gaze never wavering from his. He was far too easily distracted by her voluptuous form. Perhaps, he should supply her with a less revealing attire.

Natasha shrugged, "Scrabble, I suppose. It's a word game. Fairly self-explanatory. I'm sure you'd enjoy it…but you'd have to be in here…or allow me to come out there to play it…but I don't think that you'd be able to concentrate with me in my current state of dress."

"A word game… very well," Loki contemplated as his eyes continued to peruse the gorgeous woman before him. With a quick motion of his hand she was arrayed in a mint green dress, the skirt was loose and stopped a few inches below her knees. It had short sleeves and an oval neckline with white lace trimmings. She looked quite pretty, he thought absently. "You will teach me it." And in the next instant he was inside the glass walls, a small table laid out in the middle of the small space with a box on top containing the game that she had described.

Perhaps she could get him to trust her. Maybe she could find some way to escape this prison and let her friends free.

Natasha looked down at the dress she was adorned in, "I take it green is your favorite color…"

She moved to sit in front of the table and began laying the game out. She shook the velvet bag filled with the game tiles and held it out to him, "Pick seven."

Natasha waited until he had his letters picked, then picked her own before setting it aside. She pointed to the board before them, "We have to start at this star in the center of the board. After that, you have to make sure that whatever word you create connects to one of the letters of the words already on the board. For example, if your first word was…orgasm", a little smirk played across her lips as she continued, "…you could use the M from orgasm to create the word 'mark' and so on and so on. You cannot place words in a diagonal pattern and there are spaces on the board that gives you extra points…like double letter, triple letter, double word, triple word…it's easy enough."

Natasha leaned forward a bit, "I'll be gentle since it's your first time."

She wanted him to be as flustered as possible. She wanted to confuse him…make him want her and hate himself for it…she needed to get the unflappable god of lies off of his A game.

"Interesting choice of words, little spider," Loki drawled as he gazed at the small tiles that he held in his hand. The game seemed simple enough. When his dark green eyes looked back upward she was leaning forward and the scoop of her neckline from this particular vantage point gave him a perfect view of the beautifully formed breasts beneath her newly gifted dress.

He forced his gaze back up to her sapphire orbs and inclined his body closer to hers along the table. Their faces mere inches apart. "Don't hold back on my account, little spider, I like it rough." He couldn't help but note the delicate pout of her mouth. He imagined that she must taste very sweet by the look of her soft, pink lips. But he quickly pushed the thought from his mind. That was not why he was here. "You go first, little spider."

Natasha stared at her tiles until she heard him impatiently clear his throat from the other side of the table. She smirked up at him from beneath her eyelashes and began laying out her first word.

"Singer…not impressive, but it'll do" she said as she went to get more tiles out of the bag. "You have to keep seven tiles on your stand at all times. When the game winds down, the person with the highest score after either player runs out of tiles wins."

Natasha stared at him as he contemplated his move. Being this close to him made her appreciate how handsome he was. Pale, perfect skin in direct contrast with his dark hair and rich, green eyes.

Loki pursed his lips together as he gazed down at his tiles in deep thought. He needed to spell something but what? His dark green eyes narrowed as he concentrated than a large smile spread across his lips as his long slender fingers began to pick up the tiles from his stand. " T… with the help of your R," the young god grinned broadly. "Perfect… Eh heh heh heh… how is that, little spider?"

Natasha raised a brow and nodded, "Very nice."

The two began going back and forth, matching points and challenging each other on the validity of certain words. Loki claimed that if he couldn't use Valhalla, she couldn't use the word "Heaven".

Toward the end of the game, Natasha almost forgot that she was a prisoner facing certain death. She was actually having a decent time with him.

Natasha leaned back in her chair, "This is kind of surreal, don't you think?"

"I suppose," He remarked as he gazed along the board before turning his attention back to the woman at his side. He had nearly forgotten the reality of the situation. She, the prisoner, and he, the Victor. He glanced around at the glass walls that enclosed them. "You were right, this mortal game was fun but you failed to kick my ass as you so eloquently put it." He supposed it wouldn't do for him to stay much longer. He began to wonder if coming at all had been such a good idea. "It seems we are evenly matched, little spider, what do you do in this game when your scores are the same?"

Natasha looked down at her tiles, "You add up all the points on the tiles and whoever has the most wins…"

She stared at him for a moment, "What are your plans for us?"

"Us?" Loki narrowed his gaze as he observed the calm blue eyes of the black widow, the wispy flutter of her long, red lashes. She certainly was a master at her craft, he mused. What man wouldn't get lost in that coquettish stare? But he was not like other men. Though at the moment he found it difficult to remove his eyes from hers. "I have no plans for an us. If you think to garner my sympathies with your usual methods you will not have much luck, I assure you." He stood up from the table. Suddenly annoyed with himself for enjoying her company.

"What are my plans for you?" Loki snipped as his irritation for how he had let her affect him grew. "I haven't decided. Do you have any preferences, little spider?"

"None that I can think of at the moment", she said, staring into his eyes. Natasha knew that they were on borrowed time. All of them were. Loki may have liked the way she looked, but that might just mean he'll refrain from carving her to pieces when he finally does kill her.

There was no way all of the Avengers would make it out of there in one piece…unless she figured out a way to get to Loki.

"That's too bad," Loki taunted as he tried to regain a feeling of detachment for the assassin. This evening had not gone at all like he planned. "Left to my own designs who knows what I will come up with. You should try to be more forth coming with your responses if you want to keep my interest, little spider." He tapped his long slender fingers along the table. Why had he not left yet? What was he waiting for? He wasn't sure but for some reason he was reluctant to leave her company.

"Perhaps, I should move on to one of my other prisoners," the young god pondered with a slight smirk. "Would you like to know what I have planned for your so called comrades? Tomorrow is a big day for your little birdman." His dark green eyes bore into hers as he awaited her response. He refused to be the only one affected by this meeting. He would break through her wall one way or the other.

"Sure. You can enlighten me if you like", she remarked casually as she once again lay on the cot. Natasha purposely allowed the skirt of the dress to ride up as he watched her. She needed him to keep his guard down, and she'd done a better job of distracting him when she was in just her underwear.

Loki watched as the Black Widow arranged herself once more on the cot along the wall. The way the skirt had fallen as she lied down gave a clear view of her thigh. For a moment, he had a clear picture in his mind of how it might feel to run his hand along her skin; he swallowed deeply before he returned his gaze to her eyes.

"Tomorrow is his last day in the realm of the living," he promised. "Would you like to watch?" His gaze was cold as he once again waited for even the slightest sign of emotion. "I have a delightfully painful end planned for him, little spider. I'm sure you'll enjoy it."

"I thought your original bargain included you watching him kill me…in the most intimate way possible. THEN you kill him…This seems a bit out of order, Loki" she said as she slowly lifted the skirt further up her legs once she saw his eyes drift there.

Natasha then brought a hand up, popping open one of the top buttons of the dress.

Loki licked his lips subconsciously as he watched her hand move up her thigh, gliding the skirt a little farther up her legs before she undid the first button of her dress. He could feel his body twitch at the action. He was beginning to lose his focus. He glanced away from her for a moment.

"Plans change," the young god divulged as he continued to look toward the outside of the cell. "He is the weakest of you and so I've deemed him the first one to go. The first thing I'm going to do is pluck out his eyes." His emerald gaze returning to hers and an evil smile playing along his lips. Perhaps, she didn't care as much about this one as he thought. He took a step closer to her. His eyes roaming her body unabashedly until he caught himself and his blank mask was firmly set back in place.

"It is the only thing that he has left that he values since he already believes you are dead. I informed him of your demise two days ago. I'm surprised you didn't hear his wails. It seems you suffered much. He didn't believe me at first until I showed him your bloody uniform."

He was beginning to wonder if perhaps she truly was as calculating and cold as she appeared. "It seems he cares much more for you than you do for him. How long do you think I should let him suffer in blindness before I put him out of his misery? I can be merciful when it pleases me."

"Oh…I see…" she murmured thoughtfully. Natasha stood up, "So, you're going to torture us by taking away our strengths or our most valuable assets. Naturally, Clint's is his eyesight. Well, Tony…his is his money and power…congrats there. You've got that. I'm guessing you've already stripped your brother of Mjolnir…Bruce, you've suppressed the other guy…Steve…well, there's plenty to be done to him."

She smirked and ran a hand down her chest, undoing another button, "That leaves me. I'm sure you don't want to scramble my brain…not yet at least. My intellect is my greatest asset. But then again…" She suddenly ripped open the dress and shrugged it off of her shoulders, "…this is one of my greatest strengths. This body…this unassuming figure…I've used it to bring men to their knees. Are you going to scar me? Perhaps you should add to the myriad of scars I have on my back?"

Natasha turned around and ran a hand over the back of her waist, "Or perhaps you should reopen old ones…"

The young god's breath hitched as she undid yet another button. She was still as cold as ever but her body inspired an uncomfortable heat through his limbs as she disrobed from the dress he had given her, turning away from him as her hand glided seductively along the silky flesh of her back. He could see the scars but they took nothing away from her beauty.

Loki stepped behind her, barely a hairsbreadth from her body. His desire for her growing by the second but so was his anger. Not only at himself for letting her affect him but for her as well. That she thought she could treat him like one of her marks enraged him.

"Your summation of me is wrong, little spider," the trickster bit off irritably. "As was mine of you, apparently. It seems I already know everything about you that there is to know." He leaned forward slightly as he whispered against her ear. "I like my women with a bit more fire." He could feel her soft red curls against his face as he closed his eyes at the sensation. "And you, little spider, are made of nothing but ice." His fingers twitched slightly at his sides as he fought the urge to touch her. It was long past time for him to go, he decided. He took a step backward as he replaced the distance between them. Staying here any longer was madness.

Natasha's eyes rolled closed when he spoke against her ear. His breath tickled her skin, but she forced herself to remain quiet and still as he whispered to her. She could hear the anger rising in his voice and immediately began formulating a backup plan.

As he turned to leave, she turned around to face his back, crossing her arms, "And what would a Frost Giant know of fire?"

Risky move…but it might keep him around a bit longer…

Loki rushed forward and grabbed her by the back of her neck as he crushed his lips against hers. Invading her mouth with the sheer force of his will as his tongue found hers. Releasing all of his pent up emotions in those few minutes before he broke away from her abruptly. His breathing slightly labored as he steeled his features. His face turning back to stone.

"I know enough," the trickster remarked coolly. "It's obvious that I know more than you. If your intellect and your body are truly your only assets than you are not much use to me. I could have both with nothing more than a touch." Loki glided one slender finger along her breastbone as he gave her a wicked grin. "You do remember that, don't you?"

Natasha's mind went completely blank as his lips connected to hers. The kiss was feverish…passionate…almost violent. Before she could stop herself, a moan escaped her lips as she placed her hands against his chest.

When he broke the kiss, she glared up at him, panting heavily. She forced her breathing to calm as she stared up into his dark green eyes that glinted mischievously. Natasha gave him a hard shove, but knew it would do little against a god of his size.

"Could you!?" she spat angrily. "You may be able to take my body…but I can see it in your eyes, Loki…you want me to be willing. You want me to want you back…you want me to say your name with real passion…not some rehearsed bullshit you've cooked up because you've managed to manipulate me or turned me into a shell of my former self. You claim I have no fire. Oh…I have fire and you know it, don't you? You're just afraid to get close because you know you'll get burned!"

Loki couldn't deny the truth in her words at least not to himself. He may not have realized it when he first made his way down to this cell but it had become undeniably real to him the longer he had stood within these walls. He wanted her but more than that he wanted her to want him. He wanted to break through the ice and cold that prevailed along her exterior and feel that fire that scorched from within.

"You have a very high opinion of yourself, little spider," the trickster slithered as his eyes moved over her body once more. "You are so used to having those piddling mortal men throw themselves at your feet that you think that you can bring a god to his knees with one feeble outburst of emotion? I'm afraid I can waste no more time on you today. I would hate to keep Barton waiting."

"If you don't really want me…if I'm so disposable to you…why not go ahead and kill me? You've already made my teammate suffer thinking I'm dead. Why pretend? Why not do it for real?" Natasha paused and smirked, "You could snap my neck with the flick of your wrist…but I stand here, defiant. Challenging you…and you like it. Am I wrong? Prove it. Kill me."

"Perhaps I want to make you suffer," Loki smirked as he loomed over her. The memory of the taste of her lips so fresh in his mind that he couldn't help but let his gaze fall if only for a moment to her soft, lush mouth. "Maybe I'm curious to see if the Black Widow can even feel at all. Your little birdman has such a different image of you in his mind than what I see before me now. A woman he would gladly die for." With a wave of his hand, the table he conjured disappeared from the cell. Her dark blue gaze stared up at him defiantly. He bent his head to bow mockingly like a gentlemen would do when leaving the presence of a lady. "Alas, he will have to settle for dying for no other reason than to satisfy a King's whims."

Natasha watched as he started to leave, "Wait!" She watched Loki stop in his tracks before turning around and sneering at her. She placed a hand against her chest and stared into his eyes, "Kill me. Not Barton. He could be more use to you. He's got more expertise in various areas than me…I should die. Not him. You're right. I'm disposable, but he's not. Kill me…not him."

"I recall you manipulating me once before using Barton as a catalyst," Loki revealed as he closed the distance between them once more. "You owed him a debt. Was that not what you said? I thought you cared for him. And I tried to use that to break your calm demeanor but you tricked me. I am not so easily fooled twice." The young god narrowed his gaze as he scrutinized her closely. "Why do you make such an offer, little spider? Because you think he is better than you? Because of your ledger? Or is it something else?"

Natasha stared up at him, "I'm sure you're well aware of my motivations, Loki. Barton told you everything else you needed to know…I'm sure he told you about…our complicated history."

She looked away, "Look, more than anything, he's my friend. And this is what friends do. You want to see me in a moment of weakness? Take a long look. Here it is. There's no manipulation here. I offer you my life freely in return for you letting Barton live."

Loki watched as she looked away from him. He grabbed her chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilted her head to face him once more. "Barton is of no use to me. Such a trade would hold no value." He leaned in closer, so they were mere inches apart as he searched her eyes. "But perhaps I could be willing to stay my hand and let him live a little longer. On one condition, little spider, I will come to visit you tomorrow. We will spend the time however you would like. But you will not treat me like you are on a mission and I'm your prey. There were moments this evening that were… pleasant. And you've peaked my curiosity." He released her chin but he didn't move away from her. "Do we have a bargain, little spider?"

Natasha nodded, "Yes."

She stared up into his eyes before he turned and took his leave. Natasha spent the remainder of the night wondering why Loki was so willing to spare Barton's life just to spend time with her. She'd have to be careful not to revert back into her "Black Widow" persona and continue to be Natalia.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, Natasha was just climbing out of her frigid shower an wrapping the towel around her body when she spotted Loki.

"Shit! Don't you make noise when you move? How did you sneak up on me?"

"Magic," Loki advised as he gave her the barest of smiles. He couldn't help but notice the way the droplets of water glistened along her bare shoulders and the soft wet curls that fell around her face were rather delicious. The young god had arrived a mere minute too late it seemed or he might have gotten to see even more of her body than he had yesterday. It was probably for the best, he mused to himself, as it was he was finding it difficult to keep his desires in check.

"I teleported into the room, little spider. I've brought you a new dress." He pointed to a dark green outfit that was laid across her cot. He turned around so that his back was facing her. "Let me know when you're clothed."

Natasha eyed him for a moment before dropping the towel. She quickly finished drying off before donning the dress and clearing her throat, "Alright. I'm dressed."

She rocked on her heels a bit when he turned back around, "What are you in the mood for today? I can teach you another game…"

"I want to know what you are in the mood for," Loki advised as he took a tentative step closer to her. She looked incredibly beautiful in the dress that he had picked out. It was a simple green frock with a lace overlay, the loose fitted skirt stopping halfway between her knees. "As I told you last night I am curious about you. Tell me what you would like for us to do. Anything at all, little spider, and we will do it."

Natasha fiddled with her hands for a brief second before she looked up into his eyes, "I…I want to watch cheesy movies and curl up on a big couch with a big blanket…while snacking on junk food and making sarcastic remarks about how crappy the movie is."

She shrugged a little at the expression he favored her with.

"It's something I do…I enjoy it."

Loki raised furrowed his brow at her suggestion. She shrugged her shoulders and he couldn't help the sideways smile that appeared along his lips. He reached out and grasped her hand which caused her to flinch. Her obvious aversion to him soured his mood considerably but he held onto her hand and cast his spell just the same.

They materialized in his suite and he let go of her hand as he strutted towards the large sofa that adorned the living room and sat down. With a wave of his palm a lush blanket appeared at his side as his dark green eyes observed her still standing in the very spot where they had arrived.

"What type of junk food would you like exactly," he stated matter-of-factly as the widescreen TV clicked on. "You will need to locate the show yourself, little spider, I'm not quite sure what you mean by cheesy."

Natasha slowly walked to the couch and sat down beside him. She contemplated his question for a moment before she smiled, "Popcorn, Twizzlers and sour patch kids…"

Natasha picked up the remote and began flipping through the channels. She stopped at Twilight and laughed as she picked up one of the recently conjured treats, tucking her legs beneath her as she covered them with a blanket.

"You're in for a treat…even the actors in this franchise makes fun of these films…"

Loki didn't pay much attention to the movie. He found himself more often than not stealing glimpses of the woman on the couch beside him. Her laugh was delightful and her smile even more so. He decided to try the treats that she had requested and while he had rather enjoyed the popcorn and the long skinny pieces of rope, he found the sour children to be quite awful. Natasha had laughed quite heartily after he had bitten into one of those.

When the third movie had finally ended, she sat there quietly holding the remote in her hands but she made no move to change the channels as she had done previously.

"Would you like something else to eat?" Loki puzzled.

"I think the last movie is coming on…we should watch it." she said with a smirk. In truth, she was tired, but she desperately didn't want to be locked back in her cell just yet. She'd never admit it, but being locked in a cage freaked her out.

About halfway through the movie, Natasha fell asleep, her head nestled against his shoulder.

Loki was more than a little surprised when he felt her head suddenly graze his shoulder. He quickly surmised that she had fallen asleep. The woman would never have been this close to him had she been awake. She shifted her body in her slumber and snuggled closer. He wrapped his arm around her cautiously, enjoying the feel of her so close to him. He could feel the curls of her hair tickling his chin and he smiled as he leaned back into the cushions and closed his eyes. He had delighted in the evening very much. Too much, if he was honest with himself. But he pushed the thought from his mind as he let his body relax.

Natasha snuggle further against him, moaning softly as she fell deeper asleep.

Loki stretch languidly as he began to open his eyes. There was a lazy grin on his face as he felt the light against his eyelids. He froze for a moment at the sight that greeted him. The morning sun was pouring through the window and the dark blue gaze of the Black Widow was peering down at him. His arm was still wrapped around her and her hand was resting softly upon his chest as her body pressed against his.

He had fallen asleep he realized. Slept the remainder of the late night hour, in fact, without the slightest disturbance. He wondered how long she had been awake and staring at him. The young god wondered if she had been scanning the room for an instrument of some kind to use against him to attempt an escape. There was nothing here that would be of any use, of course, he wasn't a complete imbecile. Still it had not been wise for him to let his guard down so easily.

There was something about the softness with which she regarded him at that very second that caught his attention suddenly. His thoughts seemed to blur as her soft pink lips beckoned him closer. Another unwise idea he was certain but he made no attempt to stop himself as he inclined his head toward her and absorbed her mouth in a long, drugging kiss.

Natasha never expected that she'd wake up in the arms of the god of mischief…the being that had conquered earth and imprisoned her and her team. But, nonetheless, here she was, staring up at his distinguished profile as he slept.

When he stirred and immediately woke, they shared an unspoken moment of intimacy before his lips were on hers. It had been unexpected…and just like their first kiss, her brain stopped working for a brief moment. Natasha began moving her lips against his, shifting her body slightly to press herself further against him.

Natasha knew how much Loki wanted her. Why else would he be so willing to trade Barton's life in exchange for time spent with her? He was a king…sitting alone on top of the conquered mountain, and he had no one to share the spoils of war with.

She could use this to her advantage. She could give him companionship…she would kiss him and let him see and feel her body, but she would stop short of the true prize.

Natasha's guilty pleasure had been watching The Tudors. When a young Anne Boleyn was told to think of a way to keep the king's interest, she expertly embarked on a journey of temptation, slowly driving Henry so mad with desire that he nearly ripped an entire nation apart and founded a new church…just for her. She promised him a son and a life filled with happiness and obedience.

In that moment, Natasha found it ironic that, despite all of her training, she was taking cues from a television show. But it could work.

Natasha felt him pull her closer, moaning softly as his hands began to explore her curves. He seemed primed and ready to go…so she took that as her signal. Natasha suddenly broke the kiss, panting and dizzy with lust, "Loki…we can't."

She brushed her hair out of her face and moved to the opposite side of the couch, desperate to put some distance between them.

Loki groaned as he felt her respond to him, her lips matching his own movements as she shifted her body even closer to his. He glided his hands up and down her lithe frame greedily. The sound of her slight gasps and soft moans as their kisses deepened sent him into a near frenzy of desire.

But a small voice inside of his head reminded him that this was the Black Widow that was lying so temptingly in his arms. Every move that she made was calculated. She was a master of the art of seduction and as incredible as she felt, her reactions to him could not possibly be real.

She pushed him away suddenly as she scooted toward the other end of the couch. She was breathless as she brushed her long, red curls away from her eyes. Her face flushed and his gaze couldn't help but linger at the rise and fall of her breasts as she pulled the blanket around her.

"WE can't," Loki drawled as his dark green eyes bore into her own. "That would imply that you wanted to, little spider, which I know that you don't." But by the All-Father, he did. He wanted her even more desperately than he had just moments before. The more he tasted of those luscious lips the more difficult it became for him to control his lust. Never in his life had he wanted a woman this much. He stood up abruptly as he moved toward the windows of his suite and gazed down at the city below. "You would be wise to remember that I'm not a fool."

Natasha waited for the lust that coursed through her veins to calm before she slowly looked up at him and sucked her teeth, looking away. Ok. So maybe this was a part of an act, but he had no idea what he was talking about. She would have pinned him to the very window he stood before and had sex with him against it if she had just a few less morals.

Natasha DID want him…that was the tricky part of this whole thing. She sat there, her fingertips lightly playing against her lips as she remembered the delicious kiss that they'd shared mere seconds before.

"Whatever, Loki. I don't have anything to prove to you…" she said quietly, diverting her gaze. "I know you're not a stupid man…I know that all too well."

When he returned her to her cell a few hours later, Natasha knew that he could watch her on the security monitors if he so chose, so she went about her normal routine and showered, but after her shower, she put on the nightgown he provided and curled underneath the single blanket on her cot. She began discreetly touching herself beneath the cover.

Her hand slid down to the apex of her thighs while the other remained on her breast, firmly squeezing. She was careful to try to keep quiet as she pleasured herself, the blanket falling away from her outstretched open leg as her body drew closer to completion.

A few soft moans emitted from her throat, and soon, she reached her peak, allowing his name to spill from her lips among a whispered chorus of gasps and moans.

"Loki…" she moaned huskily as her body came undone. She shuddered hard for a few moments before she relaxed against the bed and settled in for her nap.

Loki couldn't seem to stay away from the Black Widow. He had brought her back to her cell that morning and continued on about his usually routine. There were actually a great many things that required a ruler's attention but as his meetings with the generals of his armies and giving his instructions to those he had left in charge over the myriad of sectors of his new Kingdom, his mind kept drifting back toward the woman who was housed in the bottom levels of his palace.

Her body was a work of art and one he very much wanted to experience more fully. But he would not let himself get caught up in her game. He would not fall for her tricks ever again. The sting of her manipulations to retrieve information from him about his plans to use the monster still irritated him. He should have realized what she was up to. Perhaps, her beauty had affected his reasoning even then.

It wasn't very long before he found himself once more within her cell. As he began to materialize he heard her moans as she laid along her cot, her eyes closed tight in pleasure, the blanket in slight disarray as her limbs began to shudder. He could feel his own body hardening at the sight but when he heard his name fall from her mouth his jaw dropped. What kind of ploy was this? He thought as he watched her body tremble through its climax.

Natasha's eyes slowly drifted open as she floated down off of her peak, moaning as she stretched languidly. She screeched and fumbled to cover herself more fully when she caught sight of him standing there in her cell.

That reaction was definitely not an act. She had NOT expected him to be there in the flesh. Maybe watching on a monitor somewhere…but he was right there.

"What are you doing in here?!" she practically screamed, working to cover herself with the blanket. She wasn't sure why she felt so exposed. She'd planned on letting him see that…so why was it so unnerving to have him so close?

Oh right…because she actually IS sexually attracted to him. She was actually flustered.

Her face flushed red in embarrassment and she desperately attempted to keep her eyes off of his. He was just standing there…looking dumbfounded.

"I was just… I never thought that you would be… I hadn't meant to… I apolo…," Loki stumbled out nervously before he stopped himself. Was he about to apologize to his prisoner? The Fates forbid, he wasn't going to let her turn him into a stuttering fool. It was just an act on her part and he couldn't let himself forget that. As intrigued by her as he was, he couldn't allow himself to lose his wits.

"Stop the act," the young god declared sternly. "I'm not sure how you knew that I would be arriving but it's obvious that you planned for me to see your little display. I thought we had a bargain, little spider, I am not one of your targets for you to entice with your well-practiced tricks." He turned away from her. The sight of her so close to him in that silky gown with her cheeks still so rosy from the orgasm that he had watched flow through her body was too much for him. "I thought that we could spend some time together this evening but I warned you not to manipulate me. Perhaps our agreement has reached its end."

Natasha blinked, gaping at him incredulously, "Listen to yourself! How would I know you'd be coming in here at that specific time? Is it because you come here at the exact same time every day?! Obviously not. Or maybe it because I can read minds, or maybe I know magic!"

Sarcasm was one of her strong suits, and she'd pulled it out full force for that. Even THIS hadn't been a part of her plans. No, she was telling the truth in this moment.

"Women don't fake orgasms when they're by themselves, Loki. And the fact that my entire body is flushed is a clear indicator that I didn't fake it." She adjusted the blanket on her shoulder and murmured, "…there's other things you could check too, but I'm afraid you'd actually take me up on that offer…"

She collected herself for a moment before meeting his gaze head on, "You can rest assured that this isn't one of my tricks."

It wasn't. It was Anne Boleyn's. Natasha had never tried this before. Every other time she's seduced a man it was to get information or to kill him. The goal was short term. With Loki…she'd need to keep him interested…

Loki turned back toward her cautiously. She couldn't have known the precise time he was coming. It had been a spur of the moment decision to come to her cell. "I know you're not psychic," he bit off sarcastically. "But I also know that you were not thinking of me while you were… you do not desire me in that way. You have no interest in me at all except to protect your little archer." The thought of the way that his name sounded falling from her mouth made him lick his lips expectantly as his eyes lingered along the flesh of her legs that peeked out from beneath the blanket. "Who knows how many times you… how many unsuccessful rehearsals you put on before I arrived."

He turned away from her once more. The image of her writhing before him was a difficult one to erase. He wanted to cause those sounds to fall from her lips from his own ministrations. He wanted her beneath him. He wanted to make her scream out his name. He shook his head as he tried to clear his mind, running his fingers along his long, ebony locks in frustration.

"These meetings of ours are a mistake," Loki murmured half to himself. "Nothing good can come from them."

Natasha ran a hand through her disheveled curls and allowed the blanket to fall away from her shoulder slightly. She actually had been thinking about him when she was touching herself. She could imagine those lips exploring every slope and curve of her body. She could imagine him inside of her, demanding that she say his name…louder.

She quickly shook her head in attempt to clear it of those wanton thoughts, "I have a thing for bad boys…not proud of it…and I know I shouldn't think of you in that way, but I can't help it. You're a god, for Christ sake, Loki. Of course you affect women…that way. And…with the kisses…it was easy to get caught up…"

Natasha was surprised that she hasn't uttered one lie. She was extremely sexually attracted to him…

Loki listened to her words and he wondered how much if any of what she said was true. He strutted back toward where she sat along the small cot. The blanket had fallen away and left a very tempting view of her slender neck and shoulders. He trailed his finger along the thin strap of her nightgown as he gazed down into those deep sapphire orbs. They were like an ocean of untapped emotion and he longed to make her come undone.

"I don't trust your words," Loki stated coolly. He twisted his fingers along a strand of her hair, rubbing his thumb languidly against the silken ringlet while his other hand glided along her shoulder. He felt her body tremble beneath his fingertips and he wondered if it was indeed lust for him or fear or perhaps even disgust. He could not read her and he didn't like it. "You are a beautiful woman and you know it. Using it to your advantage is akin to breathing for you."

Natasha stared into his eyes, a challenge glinting mischievously behind them. She wanted him to know that she wasn't lying. The fact that he didn't believe her now that she actually was being truthful made her feel like she was going mad.

"I'm not asking you to trust my words…but you could trust my body", she whispered huskily, letting the blanket fully fall away from her shoulder. "I couldn't fake the physical effects of an orgasm…"

As she dropped the blanket, Loki's eyes couldn't help but immediately fall to the swell of her breasts, her quivering tips pushing against the silken fabric of her gown were clear evidence that her body was still very much aroused. He released her hair as he moved his hand along her shoulder before he wrapped his fingers gently around her arms and pulled her up so that she was standing in front of him.

He claimed her mouth slowly with tender and erotic movements of his lips before moving his attentions to her neck, suckling along her flesh, enjoying every inch of her skin. She was truly divine. "Was this what you were imagining me doing, little spider?" He whispered along her throat.

Natasha's body was on fire by the time he kissed her. She reciprocated, eagerly moving her mouth against his and seeking out his tongue. She moaned against his mouth and trembled slightly.

"…somewhat", she whispered in response to his question as she felt his lips move down her neck. Good lord, he was a god…

She moaned softly, whimpering his name as she allowed her body to melt against his. Natasha shook her head as she ran a hand down his chest and nipped at his neck, "I want you…"

Natasha slowly pressed her hands against his chest, gently pushing away from him, "…but I know this can't happen."

"And why is that?" he rasped breathlessly in his sultry accent. "If you truly want me as you claim." He let his hand travel up her inner thigh beneath her gown until he reached the warmth between her creamy hips. "Then why not make wanting a reality." He whispered as he began stroking his fingers along her flesh. His entire body overcome by his aching need to have her.

Natasha's eyes once again rolled closed as she shivered against his touch. Her lips brushed against his as she whispered, "Because you don't trust me…and I can't trust you. How do I know you're not playing me?"

She moaned as she grabbed his wrist. For a moment, her hips rocked against his touch, but she slowly pried his hand from the apex of her thighs, backing away from him. She was breathless with desire. Every single nerve in her body stood on end, calling out for his touch. It took every ounce of will power she hand to keep from throwing herself at him.

There had to be no doubt in his mind now…he'd felt how wet she was…felt how eagerly she responded to his attentions.

"You've spent all this time accusing me of toying with you. But I'm no deity…you are. You are the god of lies and tricks. What better way to throw me off your scent than force me to spend my time defending myself from your allegations?"

Loki could barely form a coherent thought as he felt her body quivering against his fingers, she was so warm, so wet at his touch that he could think of little else then having his way with her. "Is trust so important?" He asked as he strutted forward and enclosed her face in his hands. "Is mutual desire not more than enough, little spider?" He brushed his lips tantalizingly against hers once more, nipping playfully at her bottom lip before deepening the kiss. His hands moving to her hips as he lifted her up in one swift motion and wrapped her legs around his waist, pressing her against the wall. "I can bring you so much more pleasure than that little daydream of yours." He breathed against her lips as he ground his body into hers.

Natasha arched against him provocatively and gasped as she felt him pressing against her core. She began to believe she wasn't strong enough to pull off this little plan.

Just before she felt herself giving over to his will, she shook her head and squirmed against him, placing one foot on the ground, "we can't…this isn't right. I'm your prisoner…how do I know you won't just kill me after?"

Loki gasped audibly at the loss of her lips as she squirmed away from him, her hands pushing against his chest as she attempted to disentangle herself from his waist. He kept his one hand firmly against her thigh, doing his best to keep her pinned in place. His dark green eyes gazing at her with a predatory gleam.

"Taking your life is the last thing that I could ever want, little spider," Loki whispered huskily as he returned his attentions to her neck, suckling harder, determined to leave a mark for his efforts. His hand cupping her breast over the thin, silky fabric with a tender caress. "Afterwards, the only thing I will want to do is have you again and again."

Natasha moaned and weakly shook her head, but she couldn't stop herself from allowing her hands to fist in his hair as his lips found a sweet spot against his neck.

She had to concentrate harder than she ever had in her entire life just to get a coherent sentence out of her mouth. Natasha panted softly between words and phrases, forcing her brain to cooperate with her mouth despite the fact that the only thing she wanted was to give in to him, "This is…wrong…Loki…you're holding my…my entire team captive…then what? I…oh god…I slept with the…man that….that murdered my…partners?"

Natasha ground back against him, moaning as their obscene rubbing created a delicious friction against the sensitive bundle of nerves between her thighs. She was panting as if she'd just run a marathon. As her body eagerly responded to him, she didn't stop pushing against his chest, "…not like this…we can't…"

"Not like this… that would imply…" Loki exhaled, his breath coming in short gasps as he moved his lips to the soft spot behind her ear. The moan that left her lips at the action ignited his lust even more as he thrust his body against her with a near growl rumbling from his throat. "that there was a way that you could." At the moment he was nearly willing to give her anything to hear a 'yes' from her lips. "Your avengers are all safely tucked away. I have no plans on killing them. I like them where they are, little spider."

Natasha stared at him for a moment before yanking his lips to hers for a hungry, passionate kiss. God, she was at least glad that she didn't have to keep up that part of the charade anymore.

Part one of her mission was complete. She had gotten him to agree to keep them safe. That meant that she could allow herself to give into him…somewhat.

Natasha moaned before she managed to maneuver out of his grip and sink to her knees in front of him. She opened his pants and stared up into his face as she slowly took him into her mouth, sucking his member into the back of her throat while she kept her lips firmly around his shaft.

"Valhalla" he muttered hoarsely He let out his breath in a long uneven hiss as he watched her warm, avid mouth on him. That was the last thing that he expected her to do. Her dark blue eyes staring up at him with a hunger that he never imagined was possible. His hands pushed against the wall to keep himself upright. He tried to say something else but his voice seemed to stop working as his neck fell back and his eyes closed from the onslaught of pleasure.

Natasha allowed a moan from her throat to send a pleasant wave of vibrations through his shaft. His moans spurred her on, causing her to increase her movements. Soon, she felt his hand thread through her hair, helping to guide her motions as she heard his breathing quicken.

Soon, she heard him moan loudly, his grip on her head becoming tighter as he came, sending a rush of warmth down her throat.

Natasha slowly stood to her feet before kissing his neck gently, "Are you alright?"

"Alright… is the very last… word I would use," Loki gasped with uneven breaths as he gazed down at her with hooded eyes while he tried to regain his composure. He traced his finger along her mouth as a sideways smile formed along his lips. "May I return the favor, little spider?"

Natasha bit her lip and nodded. She could already see his hardened facade melting before her. This was good…and the fact that he was offering to reciprocate was even better. She needed a release after their ridiculously hot make out session against the wall.

"Yes…please", she whispered huskily.

Loki grinned mischievously as he slowly knelt down before her. Here was the King of this miserable little world kneeling before a prisoner. The oddity was not lost on him but at the moment he didn't care. With nothing more than a thought her nightgown disappeared from her body. "Eh heh heh, it is in my way," he chuckled. His lips skidded over her ribs and the curve of her belly to the small hollow of her navel. He moved slowly along her skin, his teeth nipped at her hipbone. She gasped at the action and fisted her hand in his hair as his mouth drifted over the inside of her thigh.

He kissed her intimately and her entire body jerked. "Delicious," he breathed between her legs. "Just as I knew you would be." His tongue circled her slowly then faster as she lifted her hips. Her moans growing louder, her body trembling. The reactions that he drew from her thrilled him in a way that he didn't even know was possible. His hands gripped her backside as he feasted on the moist heart of her. Her pinnacle was coming he could feel it on the verge as he lifted his eyes to take in the sight of the gorgeous woman before him. He wanted to see her climax. She dug her nails into his shoulders as he continued to kiss and lick her into a frenzy until she finally convulsed into a flurry of spasms.

He moved away from her slightly, her silk gown falling back over her luscious form as her eyes opened slowly to peer down at him. She was the most beautiful sight that he had ever witnessed.

Natasha was lost in a state of sheer euphoria. She'd never experienced such a powerful climax from oral sex before. Usually, if the guy knew what he was doing, her orgasms came on in quick, soft shudders. This was more like an explosion.

Natasha plopped back onto the cot behind her, panting as she gazed up at him with a lazy smile, "Wow…you definitely are amazing…"

She stretched out on the bed and watched him favor her with another smirk before he disappeared from her cell. She curled up and fell into a contented sleep, comforted by the pleasure he'd bestowed on her body.

He came and saw her again every day for the next four days, and each time, she kept him held at oral sex only. She wondered how long she could hold him to that until he forced her to enact step 2 of her mission.

Natasha underneath him on her cot as they made out like a couple of horny teenagers. She moaned softly as Loki ground into her, his hands expertly caressing her curves.

She was more delicious than a golden apple of Idunn, he mused to himself as he devoured her mouth greedily. The feel of her beneath him was especially intoxicating. She arched her body as he rubbed against her, his growing arousal becoming ever more painful with each thrust of her hip. He wanted to be inside of her, desperately so. He pulled down the strap of her gown exposing her breast as he took her nipple into his mouth. "I want you," he exhaled as he nibbled on the tortured peak causing her to gasp out his name. "I want all of you, little spider."

When he uttered those words, Natasha knew that part 2 of the plan had been activated.

"Loki…" she breathed as she allowed her hips to roll up against him. "I want you too…but this is so wrong…" She paused and moaned softly as his lips teased her nipple, "it's bad enough we're doing this…what are we going to do? Have sex and you just leave me in my cell like some sort of piece of trash sex slave? You've taken everything else away from me…at least let me keep my dignity."

Again, her words were true and genuine. That's probably why this plan was so brilliant. She hadn't lied to him once. That was a first for the Black Widow.

Loki sat up abruptly at her words. Sex slave, he didn't think of her as that but what exactly was she? He stood up and took a few steps into the middle of the room as he began to gaze around the glass prison. The last few days had nearly put to rest any doubts that he had of their mutual attraction. He was almost certain that she couldn't possibly be faking the reactions that her body displayed to his nearness. Almost certain, but not completely. He knew who she was and he was too astute to deny the fact that every one of the multitude of marks that she ever took to her bed were probably just as convinced that she wanted them.

There was always that nagging voice in the back of his mind reminding him of her ruse on the helicarrier and his failure to recognize her manipulation of him. Was she doing it again? Was she being honest or was this simply a plot to somehow gain her freedom?

"I don't think that of you… I… Would you prefer I stayed away?" Loki inquired as he tried to distance himself from the ache in his body. By the nines, it was so difficult to think when she was lying along the bed that way. Could he blame her for her hesitancy? After all, he had her locked away in this clear cage. Perhaps, he could alter her living arrangements. It would be rather nice to have her with him. That night that he had brought her to his rooms to watch those strange movies had been the first evening that he had slept restfully in years. He began to smile at the idea of having her in his bed.

But that little voice was unrelenting. Perhaps, this was her intent all along. If he released her from this cell than how long before she escaped or tried to find a way to free the others. He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. He was torn. He wanted her so badly. To the detriment of his reason it seemed. What was he to do about it?

Natasha watched his reaction intently, desperate to figure out what emotions were behind his movements. She cleared her throat and sat up, covering her exposed breast.

"I have actually liked having you visit me…" she said truthfully. Without his visits, she'd slowly lose her mind. "Without your visits…I would have nothing but death to look forward to."

She wrapped the blanket around her shoulders and shivered slightly, "You keep me in here…come visit when you want…and I wait for the day when you decide I'm no longer worth your time and you decide to kill me…or worse, leave me to rot in here. Alone."

"I would never do that," Loki turned back toward her suddenly, surprising himself with the emotion in his voice. "Death is something that you never have to fear from me, little spider. If you believe nothing else that I ever say, you may believe that."

"But I'm still your prisoner…who will have to wash the sheen of sweat that collects on my body during sex with my captor with frigid water before I curl up on a hard cot and fall asleep under a single, itchy blanket without a pillow."

Natasha shook her head and covered herself, "You don't think that would make me feel like some sort of captive whore? I'd literally be a slave for you…"

"I cannot give you your freedom," Loki stated coolly as he attempted to steel himself from his confused emotions. "I'm not so foolish to think that you would… I know precisely what you would do if you were no longer behind these walls." At least he thought he did but a bigger part of him hoped that he was wrong. That she truly enjoyed his company. That her desire for him was not an act.

"I would never be stupid enough to ask for my freedom…and I hope you're not stupid enough to think that…this…what's between us…was all a ploy to gain my freedom. Neither of us are that naive. I know we're enemies…and will likely spend the rest of my existence as your prisoner…"

"You're just using me…toying with me, aren't you?" she said quietly, a hint of dread in her voice. She found herself hoping that he wasn't using her…she wanted him to want her. ALL of her.

That was definitely a possible complication to her plans.

"I'm… I…," Loki dropped his gaze to the floor. Enemies, yes. He supposed that was what they were and yet she didn't feel like an enemy to him anymore. But what was she? He thought he heard a hint of emotion in her voice as he turned his emerald eyes upward once more. But he couldn't be sure. "What if you were to…" Was he making a mistake? Letting sentiment rule instead of common sense? "If you were to be confined to my quarters instead would that be pleasing to you, little spider? I assure you the hot water is in working order and the bed is very comfortable." He took a tentative step closer to her. He felt nervous though he did his best to hide it. "There would have to be a guard at the door but… I'm not sure what you are but I don't wish for you to be my enemy." The last words escaping his lips of their own accord.

Natasha stared at him, contemplating his offer for several moments before she slowly nodded, "I suppose that would make things better…"


	3. Chapter 3

He moved her that afternoon. The first thing she did was take a hot shower before wrapping herself in a warm, fluffy towel. She walked over to the large bank of windows and placed her hand against the glass, staring down at the city below her.

Natasha felt Loki's presence before she heard him…

Loki moved languidly behind her as he wrapped his arms around her waist. He breathed in the fresh fragrance of soap mixed with her own unique scent. He couldn't describe it exactly but it was pretty and sensual and all her. He began a series of slow, suckling kisses along her shoulder as she gazed out the window. "Did you enjoy your hot bath, little spider?"

Natasha's breath was stolen away when he his lips connected to her flesh. Her eyes slowly closed as she reached behind her, placing a hand on the back of his neck to keep his mouth against her sensitive shoulders and neck.

"Mmmmhmm" she moaned as her head dropped backwards slightly. She felt his hands undo the knot in her towel, letting it drop to her feet. She was fully exposed to him now, and she was thrilled by the thought.

"Loki…" she moaned softly. She loved saying his name that way…and she was pretty certain that he loved hearing it. "Take me…"

Loki wasted no time when her words reached his ears, lifting her into his arms he carried her toward the huge king size bed that adorned his bedroom chamber. In reality, it had been a mere five days since the first kiss they shared and yet the young god felt as if he had been waiting an eternity to make her his. He gazed down at her lying on the mattress as he slowly began to take off his clothes. As badly as he wanted her, he had no plans to rush this moment. She was a woman who should be savored.

He began moving his lips along her body. He had already memorized all of her sweet spots. He knew every which way to make her moan and writhe in the most delicious of ways. He kissed her passionately as his hand played between her legs. She was so wet and warm and ready for him. He could feel the pleasure building, her groans coming in ragged gasps as he shifted his fingers. Before he positioned himself and began sliding slowly inside of her.

Natasha bit her bottom lip as she desperately attempted to keep her eyes open at the sensation of him entering her. He felt so good…and she'd needed this since the very first time their lips met. She raised her legs around his waist as his pace slowly worked up to a steady, sensual rhythm.

Soon, her hips were rolling upwards to meet his eager thrusts as the sounds of their mating filled the air. It was heaven…and she couldn't help but caress and lightly scratch every bit of flesh she could get her hands on. Natasha snatched his lips down to hers for a heated kiss just as her body began to shudder and clench around his.

Just as she hit her peak, she heard him announce his own climax. She knew that her next move was risky, but it needed to be done…

"No! Loki! Not inside!" she cried, pushing him from atop her just as he came.

The young god was in a state of complete euphoria. Never had mating with a woman felt like this, it was as if she had been made for him. The perfect fit, the motion of their bodies in complete accord. When he felt her climax around him it was almost too much for him to bear. The way her body trembled beneath him and the glorious sounds of pleasure that were falling from her lips. He could feel his own peak thundering upon him quickly after.

Out of the blue, Natasha shoved him with all of her strength, pushing him off of her as his body spent itself against the sheets. He could barely breathe and his mind was still coming down from the fog that had overcome him at their joining. He lied there gaping at her for several seconds as his brain tried to process the words that she had shouted at him moments before.

"What in the name of Hel was that?" he seethed before he jumped from the bed, redressing himself with magic as he began to pace around his bedroom. "You tell me to take you and then you… What kind of games are you playing with me? I knew it… you little… That has been your point from the beginning hasn't it? See how much you can rile me up? Is that it?"

Loki brushed his fingers through his long, black hair as he strutted toward where she still lied on the bed. "You have no shame in using your body do you? Even if it's for nothing more than a practical joke."

Natasha sat up, quickly shaking her head. She was still flushed and panting from her recent orgasm as she pulled a blanket around her naked body.

His reaction wasn't all that surprising. In fact, she was surprised he hadn't thrown anything or tried to choke her.

"No, Loki…I'm not on birth control. It doesn't work on me…" she said, slowly standing up and cautiously approaching him. She needed him calm, so she gingerly walked toward him, placing a hand on his shoulder, "…I wasn't playing a trick on you. I was protecting myself. That's all…"

Loki flinched when the Black Widow placed her palm against his shoulder before taking a step backward so that her hand fell away. His dark emerald eyes narrowing as he observed the woman before him. So calm and reasonable but what else would he expect from her. He had dropped his guard around her. And in those moments during their coupling he had let himself feel without restriction. He had let go of his defenses. He had opened himself up to sentiment. He had made a mistake.

"No… no, I don't believe you," the young god insisted. "You could have just told me that before. There are things that one can do to protect against that. I could have easily taken care of things if that were your worry."

Natasha had thought of this before. She'd created a perfect, heartfelt explanation that actually turned out to be true.

She stepped forward but looked hurt when he began to yet again accuse her of deceit. Natasha lowered her head, clenching the blanket around her, "I was caught up in the moment, Loki…and even if I wasn't, I didn't want there to be anything between us…"

Natasha placed a hand on his shoulder, insistently pulling him toward her as she wrapped her arms around his neck, "I wanted to feel you…just you…inside of me…"

She leaned up, claiming his lips for a sensuous kiss, "…you can't tell me it would have felt the same had there been a barrier between us…"

Loki closed his eyes at the feel of her lips, the lushness of her mouth; it was so easy to lose himself in the sensation. Her words sounded sincere and she had almost looked hurt that he didn't believe her. His hands moved of their own accord, resting against her hips as he kissed her back.

But then just as quickly he pushed her away. He felt too much for her. He couldn't see clearly and she was using that against him.

"You expect me to believe that?" Loki bit off angrily. "No, this is just another of your clever ruses. What did you think that if you bedded the tyrant that you could somehow get your way to freedom or maybe even rescue the rest of your number? What happened, agent Romanoff? You couldn't go through with it? That's it isn't it? You just couldn't stand having the monster inside of you for another second. You're freedom be damned."

That's not true!" she yelled, matching his volume and tone with a ferocity that actually surprised her. She glared at him, "Did you even LOOK at me when we were making love? Obviously not... because if you did, you would have seen the face of a woman in total ecstasy. There is no lie there. I wanted you…I still want you, despite the fact that your paranoia forces me to defend myself at every turn."

Natasha stared up at him with pleading eyes, "Please…how can I prove that I'm not lying? Tell me what you want from me…"

"What do I want from you? A few moments ago I thought I knew… now I'm not so sure," Loki divulged solemnly. He had been surprised by the emotion in her voice and the tender look in her eyes. He wanted to trust her. What had happened to him in the last five days? "Why is it so important for you that I believe you? There is sentiment in your words but is it for me? Or is it for your friends? Do you worry, little spider, that I might take my anger out on them?"

Loki could feel the emotion welling up within him. He wasn't use to it. And he didn't like it. He knew that for his own sanity he had to put an end to it. It was madness to let himself feel this way about her.

"Then let me assuage your fears, little spider," Loki grinned with a malevolent glare as he forced his cold veneer to settle back in place. "I have no intention of killing them. I never did. I want nothing more than for them to rot in their cells for the rest of their days. Aside from that I never give them a second thought. I never had any designs against your little circus boy. I have never been anywhere near the dungeons except to see you."

Loki moved across the room as he headed toward the doorway, stopping suddenly as he glanced back at the Black Widow. "I promised you warm water and a comfortable bed and believe it or not I can be a man of my word when the spirit moves me. I hope that everything is to your liking, little spider. If you'll excuse me, I have other places that I would rather be."

Natasha called his name once more, but he was already strutting out of the door, slamming it behind him. She put on one of the button down dress shirts from his closet, having to roll up the sleeves so that she wasn't swimming in them.

There was a guest room where she supposed he'd likely want her to sleep, so during his absence, she took advantage of her comfortable new bed and forced herself to rest so that she could think up appropriate damage control.

By the time he returned some hours later, Natasha had laid out the board game monopoly and some snacks on the floor in front of the televisions. She wanted him to know that she wouldn't use sexual manipulation at every turn. He needed to know that her interest in him extended beyond the bedroom.

She stood up slowly, slightly nervous as he narrowed his eyes, glancing between her and the set up she'd laid out on the floor.

Natasha quickly spoke up, "…I thought we could just…go back to this right now. Since you don't trust me. I want you to know that I enjoy spending time with you…and I appreciate you keeping your promise."

Loki strutted into his chambers. He had spent the last few hours occupying himself with as much tedious monotony as possible. The young god did everything he could to keep his mind from the woman that he had left in his rooms. But nothing had worked. She was always in the back of his thoughts. He felt like she was haunting him.

He wasn't sure what he had expected to find when he finally returned. But he hadn't been prepared for the sight that greeted him. Natasha stood in the living room wearing one of his shirts. It was big on her petite frame, more like a dress as his eyes roamed down her slender legs. Her strawberry curls were in a slight disarray and she had laid out some sort of board game along the floor.

Loki turned his gaze towards the entrance way to his bedroom. As he debated simply walking inside without another word. He should just send her back to her cell and be done with it, he mused to himself. He sighed slightly as he brought his attention back to her. Her dark blue eyes gazing up at him. She looked a touch nervous and expectant. Was this more of her tricks? The longer he stared into those sapphire orbs the harder it was for him to cut himself off from the sentiments that had begun to bubble up inside of him for her.

He needed to send her back to her cell. He would be a fool to do anything else. The young god repeated the words to himself over and over before opening his mouth to inform her of his decision.

"What is the point of that game you have there?" Loki inquired instead. He took a cautious step nearer to her as he gazed down at the board game. "Those look like little houses?"

Natasha smiled a little, relieved that he didn't just storm past her to head to his room. He'd seen his gaze flicker in the direction of his bedroom and knew for a moment that she might lose him.

She knelt down on the floor in front of the board game, "This is a game all about money and acquiring real estate. You have to learn how to manage your finances while also building up a real estate portfolio. Properties on the board are color coded, and vary in value as you move along the board…like this one. Baltic Avenue is the cheapest and has the lowest property value, but Boardwalk is the most expensive."

Natasha continued to explain the rules of the game and could tell that he seemed interested. After a complete rundown of all things monopoly, they started playing. She was concerned he was going to make the classic rookie mistake of purchasing every property he landed on, but he practiced restraint, going about the acquisition of his properties in a slow, methodical way.

Toward the end of the game, Natasha was glaring over her property cards, trying to figure out how to pay him rent for landing on his hotel-covered Marvin Gardens…

"You're too good at this…" she said with a smirk. She slowly nibbled on a Twizzler before pouting up at him, "I can't afford the rent! How am I supposed to pay?!"

Loki realized very quickly that he rather liked this little mortal game that she had laid out before him. Nearly his entire kingdom was adorned with the large red hotels as she called them and he still had piles of these flimsy colored bills at his disposal. Natasha, on the other hand, had nothing but a few white and green pieces of paper left in her hands. The young god couldn't help the megawatt grin that lit up his face when he saw that she had landed on one of his most prestigious properties.

His eyes lifted from the board at the sound of her voice. She was chewing languidly on one of those strawberry ropes that she loved so much. Loki had to admit that they were quite tasty. He also couldn't deny that he enjoyed her company. Or the fact that she looked incredibly sexy wearing his clothes. His gaze lingered along her lips and before he could stop himself he had leaned closer to her.

"May I have a taste?" he requested impishly. She extended the red candy in her hand toward him. His sparkling emerald eyes gazing down at it for a moment before he raised them slowly back to her own. He completed the distance between them and captured her lips in a greedy kiss.

Natasha moaned against his lips as she dropped the candy in favor of wrapping her arms around his neck before she straddled his lap. She felt his hands roam up her hips as she rolled her hips against his, her own fingers slipping beneath his tunic to softly graze over his torso.

She soon abandoned his lips and turned her attention to his neck, trailing suckling kisses down his jaw line to his Adam's apple. She gave him a firm bite before licking the skin and continuing her journey to his ear.

"You taste pretty good yourself…" she whispered hotly against the shell of his ear as she ground herself against him.

Loki felt as if he had died and gone to Valhalla when she slid forward and straddled his lap. He could feel the growing ache of his arousal as she moved her body so erotically against him, her lips trailing a path along his neck and ear in such a delicious way that it was sending his body into a tailspin. He wanted her. His entire being ached for her.

He claimed her mouth once more as his hands slid beneath the material of the shirt she wore to cup her swollen breasts. "You're like candy, little spider," he whispered against her lips. "The sweetest thing I've ever tasted."

Natasha nipped at his lips as her body shuddered against his in desperate need. A whimper escaped her as she felt the hard line of his body press against her core through the thin fabric of her panties.

"You feel so good…I can't get enough…" she panted against his mouth before once again devouring his lips for a feverish, passionate kiss.

Natasha only released his lips to yank his tunic off over his head, and then promptly claimed his mouth again. "Loki…" she practically whined. "I need you inside of me…" The last words were barely above a whisper as she caught his lip in a soft bite.

Loki groaned as she tugged on his lip with her teeth before kissing him once more. Hearing those words from her mouth made him harden even more. As he grinded his hips upward, desperate for the friction. He could think of little else then his desire to fill her up. "I want you," he moaned as he tightened his grip on her hips. "I ache for you, Natalia. I want to make you mine."

Natasha reached down and grabbed the waistband of her panties before ripping them clean off her body. She kissed his lips hungrily as she moved her hands between them, swiftly unbuttoning and unzipping his pants.

She slipped a hand inside of his trousers, gingerly wrapping her fingers around his member. Natasha gasped against his lips as she felt his grip on her waist tighten. She canted her hips forward, slowly guiding herself down onto his length.

Her eyes slowly drifted closed as she relished the feel of him seated fully inside of her, staying perfectly still as she rested her forehead against his. She was already panting.

"Don't cum inside…" she whispered before she slowly began rolling her hips in torturous circles against him.

The sensation of being inside of her was overwhelming. He was certain that he would have agreed to anything at the moment. His mind was utterly useless. She was clinging to him, riding him, driving him harder into her with every move of her hips. He pressed up into her, matching her movements. Their bodies trembling in equal fervor. He buried his face in her neck, nipping and licking at her skin. His head tilted back, the sound of his name as her body clenched around him was too much.

"It's… It's… you have to stop." Was all he could sputter as he lifted her off him before his body stiffened in release. He collapsed against the floor as he stared up at the ceiling above him. What was he doing? What was happening between them? His mind was a flurry of thoughts as he tried very hard to capture his breath.

They eventually moved to the bed, where they treated each other to another round of very passionate sex. Again, she has to move off of him at the cusp of his release, and she began to wonder if that didn't bother him as much as she initially thought it would.

That was the last thing she had to dangle in front of his face. Her body…to completely be his to do with as he pleased. Right now, he was getting it on her terms.

Natasha curled into his side and fell asleep, but sometime in the middle of the night, she woke up screaming. She'd had one of her horrific nightmares, and for a brief moment, as she sat up in bed, she thought that she was still in it. She scrambled clean across the bed, hitting the floor before crawling into a corner. She sat there, hugging her knees to her chest as her entire body trembled and quaked in fear.

Loki bolted upright in the bed. The sound of her screams and a loud thud had woken him from his slumber. A sleep that he still was very unaccustomed to even indulging in at all. She was curled up in the corner of his room, hugging her knees to her chest as she rocked back and forth.

The young god moved toward her swiftly. As he cautiously sat down next to and attempted to put his arm around her. "It's okay, little spider, I'm here."

Natasha blinked her eyes hard before she finally recognized her surroundings. She looked at him and immediately collapsed against his chest, her breath coming in ragged pants against his chest as she clutched onto him. She whimpered softly as his arms encircled her. No one has ever been there to comfort her through these dreams and her exhausted mind welcomed this.

She slowly calmed before lifting her head to look up into his eyes. She suddenly felt embarrassed by her humiliating show of weakness and fear, "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to scare you. This happens sometimes…I don't have to sleep in here anymore if you don't want me to. I know this probably disturbed you. I can go if you want."

"Little spider, I never sleep," Loki admitted as he wrapped his fingers around a curl of her hair, twisting it slowly between his fingers in a soothing gesture. "In fact this is only the second evening in years that I've actually had a peaceful slumber. And both times were when you were lying next to me so if you happen to disturb me occasionally I will still be getting more rest than I would without you."

Natasha nodded slowly and breathed out, a small smile quirking at her lips, "Still…I can't imagine that screaming is how you want to be woken up…"

They climbed back into bed, and Natasha stared up at the ceiling for a long time before whispering, "I know Barton's told you about all the stuff I did…did he tell you about my family?…did he tell you about Rose?"

"Yes, he told me everything he knew about you," Loki whispered solemnly. As he tried to push down the annoyance that filled him at the mention of the archer. He knew she had only agreed to spend time with him in her efforts to keep Barton safe. She cared for him. It was probably the only genuine emotion that he had ever garnered from her. The fact of which made him very jealous of her former partner. "Is that what you were dreaming of?" He turned to face her as he propped his head against his elbow. "I'm sorry for your loss, little spider. I doubt you believe me but I truly am."

Natasha swallowed hard and nodded slowly, "I dream about that…and all of the innocent lives I've taken. Well, I guess Rose was one in the same." She closed her eyes tight and sighed, "Thank you…"

This wasn't a part of her meticulous plan. Her, seeking comfort from him in the middle of the night and talking about her most painful memories wasn't part of the deal…but right now, as she nuzzled against his chest, she couldn't bring herself to care.


	4. Chapter 4

For weeks, they continued like that. Every night, after dealing with a day of ruling his kingdom, he came home to food, a movie and/or a board game to play. They made love constantly, but Natasha kept her rule in place.

She was nervous that he didn't care as much about what she wasn't letting him have than he did about what she was letting him have…

Today, she'd made homemade pizza and had laid out Monopoly for them to play. She had her hair pulled back in a ponytail, and again, she was wearing one of his dress shirts, which she often did because he seemed to like her in them so much.

When he walked in, she smiled as she bent over to pull the pizza out of the oven, "Hey…right on time."

Loki grinned widely as his eyes grazed over her luscious form, bending and twisting so scrumptiously as she lifted the pizza from the oven and placed it on the counter top. She was becoming more and more important to him and he found himself anxious to return to her side from nearly the instant that he walked out the door. He moved behind her as she was removing the oven mitt from her hand. His arms wrapping around her waist as he rested his chin in the crook of her neck.

"I'm starving, little spider," He smiled into her skin as he began to devour her neck with long, slow kisses. "I want you." She turned in his arms and pulled him in for a kiss. The young god began walking her towards the bedroom, devouring each other with their lips and hands along the way before they finally collapsed along the bed. He began to unbutton her shirt, kissing every inch of her skin as he undressed her languidly. Well it was his shirt technically but he loved the way she looked in his clothes. He had a fantasy about her wearing his uniform and helmet. Though he doubted he would ever actually suggest it. "I don't want to stop," he murmured as he placed a sensual kiss along her breastbone. "There are other ways so you won't have to worry." He wanted her to be his in every way.

Natasha raised her leg around his waist as she ran her fingers through his silky, dark locks. She was already lost in a haze of ecstasy when he began unbuttoning her shirt. At his words, she brought his face up so that she could meet his eyes, "What ways…"

"You know what I mean." The corner of his lip upturned in an impish smile as his dark green eyes met hers. "I can wear something. I want to stay inside of you, Natalia. You have no idea what you do to me."

Natasha smiled as she enclosed his face in her hands and kissed his lips, "We could do that…but you know it doesn't feel the same…" She felt like she was about to use the logic of a teenaged boy who didn't want to use a condom with his girlfriend. But she knew it had to be done. She needed to drive him past the point of no return.

She trailed kisses up the side of his neck as she whispered against his ear, "You can't feel how wet I am directly on the skin of your cock…you can't feel every pulse and shudder inside of me…god, Loki…you don't know how many times I've been tempted to just risk it…and let you cum inside of me…" Her body trembled slightly at the thought as she let out a soft moan against the shell of his ear, "…what I wouldn't give to feel you erupt inside of me…feel your warmth deep in my core."

"By the nines, woman… are you trying to kill me?" Loki growled as he slid his hand underneath her panties, circling his fingers along the warmth between her thighs before pressing into her deeply. He watched her head tip back, a delightful moan echoing from her lips as fingers moved in and out languidly. "I want nothing more than that. I would take you right now if you'd let me, little spider." He moved his lips to her breasts. He adored her body. Every inch of her flesh was pure paradise. "But… I don't mind using protection… I just… I want to… I want to be with you. Will you let me?"

"Oh, Loki…" she breathed as she arched, her hips jerking upwards against the motion of his hand. She moaned as she slid a hand into his pants, wrapping her slender fingers around his shaft as she began lightly squeezing and pumping.

Another gasp left her lips as she felt him begin to toy with the tiny bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs. She leaned over, recapturing his lips in a hungry kiss.

"Loki…it won't be same with protection…and…I can't risk getting pregnant…", she murmured as she trailed kisses down his neck. Her words were broken up by gasps of pleasure, "I just…oh…god…I can't…"

She rolled her body on top of his before shedding her shirt and tossing it away. After some maneuvering, she managed to rid herself of her panties as well. Natasha lay on top of him, pressing her naked body against his clothed one.

Loki wrapped his hand around her neck as he pulled her in for passionate kiss. His entire body seemed to be screaming to be united with hers as he arched up against her naked form. He wanted her. He needed her. He could think of nothing else. Her words only increased the hunger that was burning through his veins.

"Natalia," the young god breathed in his sultry accent. "Just once… please… please, Natalia, let me have you. Just this once."

Natasha returned the kiss eagerly, moaning against his lips as her entire body shuddered. She had to be crazy to allow this prior to nailing down their arrangement, but she knew that once he has a taste, it was highly unlikely he'd be willing to risk losing his privileges.

"Alright…yes…yes…" she whispered against his lips. "Make me yours…"

"Wait… what?" he stuttered as he searched those sweet blue eyes of hers. Had he been hearing things. "Did you say yes… you want me to? I mean… are you sure that you… little spider… please don't play games with me… I would prefer you said no than have you change your mind." He felt like he was going to explode as she continued to rub her hips against him. He didn't know it was possible to want a woman this much.

Natasha moaned and nodded quickly, "Yes…I'm ready…once won't hurt…"

She hoped.

Loki flipped their bodies so she was beneath him as he rid himself of the last of his clothes. He was suddenly nervous which was ridiculous. He felt like a virgin about to have his first experience with a woman. He eased himself just barely inside of her, keeping a careful watch of her eyes. He realized in that moment how important it was to him that she didn't regret being with him. How much he had truly come to care for her. He did nothing to hide the emotion in his eyes as he took her slowly, gliding deep inside of her as her body shuddered around him. "Oh Natalia… you're everything I could ever want."

Natasha arched beneath him and whispered his name, raising her legs around his waist as her hands roamed down his back to settle on his ass, pressing him deeper inside of her.

She stared up into his eyes, overwhelmed by the moment. She wasn't supposed to feel this way about him. He'd taken over her world, and actually tried to kill her…but suddenly, the words were flowing from her mouth.

"Loki I lo…" She stopped, covering the break in her voice with a moan before she continued…carefully. "I love the way you feel inside of me…"

That was a close one. She'd almost told him she loved him.

The moment was perfect, more incredible than he could ever dreamed it to be. They climaxed together with a soul-shattering intensity that he could barely fathom as he groaned in blissful agony. His seed spilling into her as he nuzzled into her neck, relishing the lush red curls of her hair that tickled against his face. He held himself up with his arms keeping the brunt of his weight from her but he didn't move his body away from hers. He wanted to savor the feeling of their joining. If it were possible he could never move again and be completely content.

Natasha idly stroked his back, softly peppering his face with kisses.

"That was amazing…"

…and now she was going to have to watch her menstrual cycle like a hawk. She couldn't be bothered by that thought right now. She was determined to enjoy this moment. It was perfect…

Loki was sitting with his back leaning against the headboard as he gazed at the black widow curled up in his bed. He was still on a high from their union as he watched her sleep. It had been perfect. So much so that it had scared him. She had become such a part of his life that he could no longer imagine not having her with him.

Yet, she was his prisoner and he wasn't even sure if she felt anything for him at all. Except lust, he supposed. But what he felt for her was so much more than that. And he wanted her to feel the same way. He wanted what happened between them before to happen again. He wanted her and not just her body. He wanted her heart. Such a strange thing for him of all people to wish for. She was probably the least likely person in the universe to ever give it to him.

He noticed her eyes begin to flutter open as she gazed up at him half asleep. He caressed her cheek softly as he smiled down at her. "Don't mind me, little spider, it is barely dawn you should rest."

Natasha exhaled and brushed her lips across his chest as a lazy smile formed on her face. She'd enjoyed last night. It was special…intimate, even. She'd never had sex like that with anyone.

Her feelings were beginning to get in the way and cloud her thoughts. It would be a huge problem if she forgot why she was even here in the first place, but even the Black Widow couldn't ignore how amazing it was to wake up in his arms with those deep green eyes staring down at her.

"I'm ok…I don't need much sleep…" she murmured sleepily as she snuggled into his body.

God, he felt good.

"Then that is just one more thing we have in common, little spider," He mused as he maneuvered himself so that he was lying on his side, and they were face to face, blue eyes staring languidly into green. He brushed her soft red curls back across her shoulder before trailing his finger along her lips. "We are a perfect match." Loki captured her lips in a lazy kiss as he glided his hand down her thigh pulling her leg across his hip as he deepened the kiss. "And a perfect fit. Don't you agree, Natalia." His kisses grew hungrier as her soft moans grew louder. "I know I said just once but I am not exactly known for my honesty, am I," he grinned playfully against her lips.

Natasha laughed softly against his lips, moaned as she felt the evidence of his arousal brush against her. Her body shivered slightly as his lips found the sweet spot behind her ear, "Oh…god…Loki…once was risky enough…don't you think?"

Despite her protests, her body was eagerly responding to his attentions. It felt like his hands were in all of the right places at once as her eyes rolled closed, "oh…we shouldn't…."

Come on, Natasha…get it together.

No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get her brain to properly convey messages to her mouth and her limbs. She found herself moaning when she should have been protesting. She pressed herself harder against him when she should have been pushing him away.

"Don't think so much, little spider," Loki entreated as he brushed his body teasingly against hers, letting her feel just how ready he was for her. "It felt so good… like you were a part of me." His hands moving greedily along her body, touching every place that he knew made her crazy with desire as his lips did the same. "I think you are, Natalia… a part of me… my missing piece… you belong with me, little spider."

Natasha was losing this battle. Loki was definitely getting the upper hand here. Never before had the Black Widow been so entranced and weakened by the sexual prowess of a male. She was always the one on top. She was used to being in control in these situations.

Now, she was barely able to string together a proper sentence as his lips and hands expertly roamed over her flushed body.

"Loki…there…mmmm….there are consequences…for this…I can't…we can't…." her voice trailed off as she whimpered in ecstasy. Her body wanted him. She may as well throw in the towel now.

A low growl escaped his throat as Loki gently moved her onto her back, positioning himself as her hips lifted and her hands grasped at his waist. His breathing suspended as he gazed down at her. "Say yes… say yes, Natalia. Tell me that you want me as much as I want you."

_Don't do it, Natasha. Don't. This is nothing but trouble. Don't say it._

Too bad the Black Widow rarely listened to the voice of reason inside of her head, because the next thing she knew, she was arching her back and rolling her hips upwards, "I do…I want you…"

A chorus of moans and gasps spilled from her lips as he entered her in one, deliciously brutal thrust. Her entire body tensed, and their surroundings seemed to melt away as he moved within her.

"Natalia," Loki grunted as he set a pounding rhythm. His heartbeat thundering in his chest as she answered his thrusting hips with sweet abandon, arching to meet each possessive movement. He sucked in a startled breath as he could feel the spasm of delight begin to rocket through her. "My Natalia… mine," he all but growled as he convulsed against her.

Loki collapsed onto his back and pulled her flush against his chest as he kissed her forehead tenderly. His fingers moved languidly up and down her arm as his other hand twirled a curl of her hair that had fallen haphazardly across his breast. Was this what it was to be in love, he mused. The young god had nothing to compare it to. He only knew that he had never cared for anyone or anything more in his life.

Natasha panted as she lay atop him, his arms possessively encircling her as if he never planned to let her go. In fact, it seemed that way…literally when she moved to get up a few minutes later to use the restroom. His grip had tightened, so she looked up into his face with a small smile, "I wanted to take a shower…"

He reluctantly released her and she could feel his eyes intently watching her naked form as she disappeared into the bathroom.

They were in deep…

When Loki left the penthouse, Natasha went rooting around for a calendar. After finding one, she sat it down on the desk and began calculating her menstrual cycle. Her next one should arrive in a few days…so she was out of her "danger" window, but she was smart enough to know that no time was a safe time for unprotected sex.

If she could attempt to employ some sort of method for keeping Loki at bay during her most fertile days, she might be able to keep him happy without putting herself in danger of getting knocked up.

She was so involved with the calendar, she didn't hear him when he came in.

"What are you doing, little spider?" Loki asked curiously as he watched her staring intently at the calendar in front of her. He couldn't even begin to imagine what for. Was she planning something? He shook the thought from his mind. He needed to stop distrusting everything she did. How could he expect her to truly care for him if he doubted her every move? Trust was not something that he gave to many people. In fact, his family had been the only ones and, of course, it turned out that they were all liars. Still he needed to try, and for her, he was determined to do just that.

Natasha jumped and let out a soft curse when the sound of his voice surprised her. He moved quieter than she did…and she didn't think that was possible. She looked up at him and bit her lip. Lying would get her nowhere in this situation. He could smell a lie a million miles away. They were his business.

"I…was just seeing when I should be expecting my period. After last night and this morning, I thought it would be a good idea to keep a close eye on things…" she answered truthfully.

"You are afraid you might get pregnant," Loki surmised as his dark green eyes gazed at the calendar. She had mentioned that before. He hadn't been thinking clearly, not that he regretted being with her but he hated the thought that she might. "I do not blame you for not wanting a child of mine." he replied honestly. Who would want a Frost Giant's offspring? "In the future we should use something so you don't have to worry."

Natasha was taken aback by his reaction. He actually seemed…solemn. She slowly moved over to him and looked up into his eyes before cautiously taking his hands, "It's nothing personal, Loki. I'm your prisoner. You've got the only friends I have locked up—"

Her eyes lowered as she slowly released his hands and sat down. She'd been living in the lap of luxury while her team rotted away in those god forsaken cells.

"I want to see them", she whispered, looking down at her hands.

"Yes… I suppose they are your only friends," Loki murmured dejectedly as he watched her sink into the sofa. Her words only underscored the fact that they meant more to her than he ever could. The young god wanted so much to get her to care for him. But he seemed to be hitting a brick wall at every turn.

She was his prisoner, a point she never failed to mention. Could he blame her? Not really. How could he not see her point. Could she ever truly care for him if she was only with him because she had no other choice. Yet, where did that leave him. If he were to grant her freedom she would be gone so fast his head would probably spin. He had no delusions about that. He didn't like seeing her so melancholy. "Who is it you would want to see?"

"If I could see them…each of them. Just for a short time. I just need to see how they're doing with my own eyes. I've been up here…living like some sort of princess in a tower while they've been suffering and…I don't deserve it. The only reason you want me up here is because…" she lowered her eyes and lowered her voice to just above a whisper, "…because I have something you want…"

Natasha looked back up into his eyes, "Please?"

Loki was torn as he gazed down into her sweet blue eyes. He wanted to please her, to make her happy but at the same time he hated the thought of her going to them. They would be sure to warn her away from him. Especially the archer. The thought of her being anywhere near her ex-lover made his blood boil with resentment and jealousy.

"I will arrange for the guard at our door to take you to visit with each of them this afternoon, but only for a little while." Loki conceded before his eyes narrowed and his face became like stone. "Except for the archer, I do not want you to see him, little spider."

Natasha started to breathe a sigh of relief, but when he mentioned that she wasn't allowed to see Clint, she furrowed her eyebrows. She started to protest, but Loki's hardened gaze made her think twice about her approach to this particular disagreement.

He was jealous…of a man who was stuck inside of a cell.

"But, Loki…I don't—" The look on his face stopped her. She knew that if she said anymore, she wouldn't get to see anyone.

A few moments later, the guard escorted her down to the lower levels. They'd moved all of them, with the obvious exception of Clint, into the same cell for her visit…likely so that it would be as quick as possible.

They rushed to the glass, asking her questions, but she couldn't answer very many. She just let them know that she was alright. She asked them if they were eating enough and sleeping enough, and they answered that they were, but all of them seemed despondent. They hadn't seen the sun in weeks.

Natasha felt awful. She told them to tell Barton that she was fine before her guard drug her away.

By the time she returned to the penthouse, she felt guilty. She needed to help them…and the only way she could was by getting to Loki. As he sat on the bed to remove his shoes, she looked down at her hands, "Loki…about earlier…about being afraid about getting pregnant…it's not that I don't want your child…necessarily. It's just that…I'm your prisoner. Obviously, I receive better treatment because you have an…interest in me…but seeing my teammates trapped in those cells reminded me what I am…and what is happening here."

"We had an agreement," Loki snapped as he stood from the bed. The truth was he had been in an irritable mood ever since she left him to go on her little visit. A fact that could be attested to by every being that had crossed his path between that moment and this. He had been imagining the worst possible outcome from her time spent with them and he could see now that his summation had been correct. "That you would not play games with me, little spider. So please don't insult my intelligence by attempting to allude to the idea that if you were not my prisoner that you could ever possibly want to have my child."

Natasha was annoyed and hurt by his assumption of her…and she wasn't sure why. She stood up and got undressed, murmuring angrily the whole time. She mostly muttered about him always accusing her of lying and playing games, but she raised her voice slightly as she stomped to the bathroom.

Just before slamming the door, she glared at him, "You think you have me all figured out…but you'll be surprised to know that you don't know shit."

Natasha started the shower and waited for it to warm up before she stepped inside, letting the water cascade over her face.

Loki paced back and forth in his bedroom as he listened to the sounds of the water running in the bathroom. He was angry and every second that ticked by the angrier he got. Who did she think she was to be mad at him? Had he not just let her see her piddling little comrades? It was just another attempt to manipulate him. The young god heard the water click off moments before the Black Widow walked through the doorway in her bath towel. She glided past him toward the dresser as if he were invisible.

"Please tell me what it is about you that I supposedly don't know?" Loki seethed as he moved behind her. "You are only here because you have no choice. You only accepted our bargain because of your friends, you think to help them. Tell me I'm wrong? You saw an opportunity to use my desire for you to your advantage, is that not correct? What have I said that isn't true?"

He grabbed her forcefully by the arm and turned her to face him, shaking her slightly in his umbrage. His grip tightening as his dark green eyes bore into hers. "Please, little spider, look me in the eyes and tell me that there is even the teeniest part of you that could ever want to have the child of a Frost Giant growing inside of your belly? The tyrant that took over your world, imprisoned your precious friends. By the nines, if you found out you were pregnant right now. I shudder to think how desperate you would be to get rid of it." Loki let go of her, his body shaking in his rage as a slight tear fell down his cheek. He had been a fool to think that she could ever love him.

Natasha stared at him, listening to his accusations and desperately working to keep herself from panicking. It sounded like he'd figured her out, but…she refused to go down without a fight. She didn't have the knowledge or skill to confront the god concerning every other point he made, so she decided to stick to her important points.

"Me being pregnant with anyone's child would be a bad idea," she whispered after he spun her around to face him. "I'm not singling out your potential unborn children. I'm not that evil. The fact remains…I am your prisoner. You are my captor. My reluctance to have your child exists in part because of that. I could care less about frost giant, Aesir…or human. I'd have to get rid of it because I'm a PRISONER, Loki…"

Natasha knew that part of what he'd said had been true…but looking up into his eyes, she'd be lying if she said she didn't care for him. She did…more than she could openly admit.

"Did you really think it would be that easy?" Loki smirked. His hardened shell coming upon him in full force. This woman had too much power over him. He could never let her know it. "It's not what you say, little spider, it's all the things you deliberately skip over. Strange how your PRISONER status doesn't prevent you from lying with me. I can't even count how many times we've been together these past few weeks. The fact that I'm your CAPTOR has never stopped you. And why is that, little spider, because its beneficial to you? Well, you needn't sell your soul to the devil anymore." His cold facade began to slip away as the emotion bubbled up in his eyes.

"What did it earn you, huh? Cozying up to me, your CAPTOR? A luxury suite and visits with your friends? Well they are both yours to keep. Twice a month just like today you may see them. I will advise your guard. And you don't have to sleep with me to get it. In fact, you never have to be with me again."

Natasha flinched as if she'd just been shot. She could see him desperately trying to reinforce that cold exterior of his, but she could practically see it melting away before her very eyes. He…cared.

The worst part about this whole situation was the fact that she cared too…only apparently, he thought that she was too much of a manipulative liar to be capable of genuine emotion.

That last little fact enraged her. She was suddenly angry.

"I am SICK of you accusing me of lying! I am DONE with that! For your information, Loki, I haven't lied to you. Yes, I used my position in your bed to get some of the things I wanted, but you are also using me to get what YOU want! You keep accusing me of manipulations, lies…and here you are, the GOD of lies…" She shook her head and glared at him, "you're just frightened that whatever is happening between us is real and you're terrified of getting hurt. So…maybe I'm terrified of getting pregnant because of what I'll be accused of. Maybe I don't want that kind of stress. Maybe I'm terrified because of how lonely I'll be since, while you're busy running a kingdom, I'll be stuck alone in a tower, raising your precious heir by myself. Maybe I can't face that! I have a million and one reasons for not wanting a kid, but not caring about you isn't one of them!"

They were nose to nose now. Everything had been laid out on the table.

"I don't want children," Loki revealed, his voice beginning to crack as he struggled against the sentiments that were threatening the corners of his eyes. He would not let this woman think him weak. He wasn't going to give her another victory over him. "I know what I am. I would never wish that curse on another being."

Caring? The word was like a knife stabbing him right through his already tender heart. The heart that felt like it was breaking into pieces. Why had he ever let her near it? Life was so much easier when he cared for no one. "Caring is what you feel for those men that you just spent your afternoon with. And the one that you didn't get to see."

His voice regaining its sharpness from the mere thought of Barton. He hated how much she cared for him. It was everything he wanted that he knew he would never get. "Don't you dare imply that you care for me! I've had enough of your cleverly placed words. You allude to it because you could never actually say it. Because you don't actually feel it."

He grabbed her by the arms as if to shake the truth from her. He wanted her to admit the fact that she didn't, that it was all just a ruse while she figured out some way to get her and her comrades their freedom. He wanted to hear it from her own lips so that this hope in his heart that she could somehow love him could finally get crushed into oblivion. He wanted this ache that filled him to go away once and for all.

"I will not allow you to play games with my h…," Loki froze in mid-sentence. His heart? What a brilliant thing to say. Why didn't he just tell her that he loved her while he was it. As if he hadn't given her enough power over him already. This had to stop.

He released her arms as he moved away from her, his back facing her as he leaned against the archway of his bedroom. The memory of that morning thundering into his mind. He couldn't help but think of how incredible it had felt and how happy he had been. For those few moments, it had seemed like she was truly his.

"I meant what I said, little spider," Loki half-whispered as he continued to gaze inside the room forlornly. "You needn't sleep with the enemy anymore. You needn't fear any repercussions from it either. I will keep my promises."

Natasha rubbed her arms, knowing there would be bruises where he had grabbed her. She slowly lowered herself onto the bed and sighed, "It was stupid to think we could ever trust each other…I don't know what happened here, Loki…I don't know how I ended up feeling—-"

She paused, closing her eyes and rubbing her hands down her face wearily, "Fine. I'll leave. Obviously you're insisting on pushing me away. I tell you I'm not lying. I tell you I'm not playing games. I looked you directly in the eye last night when we were making love and I…" Natasha allowed her voice to trail off. She couldn't reveal that to him. There was no way he would believe her…he'd only keep accusing her of lies and playing games. There was no point.

"You win, Loki. You've pushed me away. Go ahead. Call the guards. Have them take me away. You obviously think I'm incapable of genuine emotion…or of telling the truth, so absolutely nothing I say will ever be good enough for you."

When Loki made the arrangements for her to leave, the guard started to walk her out, but she stopped and turned around, "…I think it's really pointless of you to be jealous of Barton, Loki. He may be my friend, and I may care about him deeply…but I never gave myself to him the way I gave myself to you…"

Natasha was taken a floor down to a luxury suite that was just a bit smaller than Loki's. She plopped down on the bed and stared out the large bank of windows, watching as Chitauri hovercrafts whizzed by on their way to and from guard posts and watch towers that had been strategically placed throughout the city.

As the days passed, Natasha did notice the uptick in human employees Loki had brought into the palace, and from the television she watched, she didn't see any terrifying changes to way of life…but he was a dictator, and rebels were made an example of. World 'leaders' were demoted to advisers, but if they dare go against him, there would be hell to pay.

Natasha tried to pay attention to the outside world, but she had personal issues to deal with. Of course, her less than dependable cycle was late that month, so she asked her personal guard to get her a pregnancy test…and gave strict instructions to be discreet about it. Sadly, he must have ignored that last part, because news of Natasha's request made it to Loki's ears by the time she received and took the test.

She had just received her negative result when she heard a knock on her door.


	5. Chapter 5

The weeks passed after Natasha had been moved to her new rooms and Loki did his best to keep his mind on other things. During the days, it was not so hard. Ruling an entire planet was not exactly a simple thing and there were a myriad of problems and issues that faced him daily. There had been a slight increase in rebel activity in certain sectors of the United States and Great Britain which had demanded his utmost attention. But they were easily dealt with.

The nights, however, were agonizingly difficult. How he mourned the loss of her in the evening hours. He had grown used to the comfort of having her sleep at his side and the restful slumber that her presence had given him. Now things were back to the way they used to be. When he wasn't plagued by insomnia, he was struggling with a fit of restless nightmares that wouldn't go away even when he opened his eyes.

As much as he didn't want to think of her, he insisted on knowing everything that he could about how she was and what she was doing. The guards at her door were instructed to fill him in on anything and everything that they could. Had she spoken to them? Was there anything she needed? Did she look rested? Did she seem happy?

On one such debriefing, he had been told that she made a request for a pregnancy test. Loki had sat there in a stunned silence as the guard had left the room. So many thoughts jumbling up in his mind that he couldn't pick out a coherent one. The next thing he knew he was standing outside her door.

When she opened it. She had said nothing. She simply turned away from him and moved back into her living room, leaving the door wide open for him to enter as she sat down on her sofa. Her dark blue eyes gazing up at him without the slightest emotion.

"Well…" Loki snapped flippantly. It was too difficult to be in the same room with her. All the feelings that he was trying so hard to suppress began bubbling up in his heart at the mere sight of her. "Did you receive good news or bad news?"

Natasha stared at him for a few moments, confused by the question. What was good news in this situation to him?

"Well…seeing as how the last time we spoke about this, you told me you didn't want any children, I would surmise that I received good news. I'm not pregnant."

She looked him up and down and fought hard against the shiver that crept up her spine in his presence. He did something to her…he tantalized and fascinated her in ways she never thought possible, despite his faults and all of the things he'd done to her and her friends. It was wrong, she knew it…but she couldn't help it.

Natasha cared about him. She loved him…

But at the same time, she hated and resented him. Just as he suspected that she was incapable of real affection, she could accuse him of the same thing. His emotional state was unstable, and she could tell that, any time he felt something other than lust and contempt toward her, he'd immediately revert to anger and jealousy.

That made for a really healthy relationship…

"Is that all you came here for? To make sure you don't have to take me down to the abortion clinic?"

Loki was surprised by the feeling of disappointment that crept up on him. He hadn't expected it. He had no desire for children. He was a monster, after all. His genes were a curse. Still it would have been more than just a part of him. It would have been a part of her.

"Congratulations on your good news," the young god retorted coldly. "I know how you worried over it." He turned around as if to leave but stopped suddenly as he whipped back to face her. There was a little voice that had been nagging at him since she had left his chambers and he couldn't contain it any longer.

"You said you never gave yourself to Barton the way you gave yourself to me," Loki snipped resentfully. He hated how weak she made him feel. "What did you mean by that? I know for a fact that you two were lovers."

Natasha was caught off guard by the question. She'd remembered how much she regretted giving Loki that ammunition. She was sure he would either use it against her or Barton if he was feeling especially cruel.

Now that she was realizing that he had no idea what she meant, she was slightly relieved…

Her mouth slowly opened as her eyes wandered down to his chest, then back up to his face, "We…I never…" She looked him in his eyes, desperately attempting to convey that she was telling the truth, "We always used condoms. Always. He's never been inside of me the way you have."

"Why did you?" he whispered softly. His dark green eyes dropping away from hers as he gazed into the empty space of the room instead. "Why did you let me? Did you think you didn't have a choice? Were you afraid of what I would do if you didn't?"

Natasha crossed her arms around her middle and sighed, "It felt right. I wanted to…"

That was all that she could manage to choke out at the time. She stopped short of explaining the full reason.

"You never believe anything I say. I've been trying to convince you that I…" her voice trailed off yet again before she looked up at him. "Actions speak louder than words. And since none of my words are good enough…maybe you'll take what happened between us as proof."

"Do you wish you hadn't?" Loki asked as he turned his back to her completely. He wanted so much to believe that she could truly care for him, that she had been with him for no other reason than that she wanted him. He couldn't deny that he had felt like she did when she was in his arms but he couldn't trust his instincts. He had been wrong about her before. "Do you regret letting me? Giving yourself to your captor? I cannot give you your freedom although I know you want it. But that is why I sent you here. This much I can give you, freedom from me."

Natasha stared at his back for some time before she moved in front of him, forcing him to face her. If she was going to say this, it needed to be to his face, dammit.

"No", she breathed, just above a whisper. "Despite your low opinion of me…and a pregnancy scare. No. I don't regret it."

"I do not have a low opinion of you, little spider," Loki entreated as he twisted his fingers in a curl of her hair. He was feeling incredibly anxious and the sensation of her velvety ringlets gliding along his skin always soothed him. How he had missed her. "Quite the opposite. You are strong and brilliant and resourceful. I have never met anyone like you."

"But you don't trust me. You will never trust me…and you know what? I'm not sure I blame you. I do sometimes have ulterior motives. I do want my friends to be safe and taken care of. That's because they're my friends. But…that doesn't mean that I'm faking everything I feel for you…"

Natasha's eyes drooped then. The words had just flown out of her mouth and they were out there now…unable to be covered. She'd shown her weakness to him. The question now was…would he believe her?

"I want to trust you," Loki admitted cautiously. "I want to believe you. It is not easy for me to imagine anyone feeling anything for me other than hate but especially you. You are so far better than… I… little spider, what is it you feel for me?"

Natasha stared up at him, "It's complicated…I don't know. I know I should hate you because of the things you've done to me…my friends…my world…but I…can't help but be drawn to you…I do have feelings for you. I don't know if I can clearly define them with one word…I just know I find myself wanting to be near you when I shouldn't."

She paused for a moment and shut her eyes, "I don't know what to do to get you to believe me…"

"I've missed you, little spider," Loki whispered as he continued to graze his thumb back and forth along the strawberry ringlet between his fingers. He could swear that he saw genuine emotion in her eyes but he was afraid to trust it. He was setting himself up for a mighty fall if she was lying to him. But did it matter? He was already in love with her. His heart was already in so much pain. Perhaps, a few more minutes of happiness was worth the risk. "I want nothing more than to have you with me again but not because you think that it is advantageous for you to be at my side. It must be because it is simply where you want to be."

The young god sucked in a deep breath. He felt suddenly exposed and vulnerable, a feeling that he didn't like at all. "You can stay here in these rooms and you can visit with your friends and you never have to see me. Or you can tell the Guard to bring you back to my chamber but only if you know in your heart that you do it without guile. If you come to me then, I will believe you."

Loki let go of her hair and quickly left her apartment, closing the door sharply behind him before he used his magic to return him to his rooms.

Natasha stood there, rooted in her spot for several moments after watching him leave. She cared for him. That was a fact. It was a TRUE fact that he seemed to not believe.

She showered, then hesitated for a moment before she put on a short, green silk robe and walked to her door.

"Take me to Loki", she said to the guard, who then obediently delivered her to the god's doorstep.

The door was unlocked, so she stepped inside, closing and locking it behind her. She looked around the dark space before venturing further into the penthouse and heading to his bedroom.

He was laying on the bed, likely attempting to rest.

There were no words spoken as she slowly opened her robe and dropped it to the floor.

It had been twenty minutes, Loki thought mournfully as he lied on his bed staring up at the ceiling. Resigning himself to the fact that she more than likely wasn't coming. In fact, with every additional second that passed he was quite certain that she wasn't. It had been a crazy thought anyway. A silly, spontaneous idea made out of his utter desperation.

The young god heard the faintest noise as he turned his head towards his door. His dark green eyes falling on the vision of her standing in the middle of his room wearing nothing at all. He practically jumped from the bed as he rushed toward her and tugged her into his arms, crushing his lips against hers for a passionate kiss. "You're really here… I'm not dreaming," Loki murmured between kisses. "You don't know how happy you've made me, little spider."

Natasha moaned against his mouth as she wrapped her arms around his neck and began pulling at his clothes with her hands. She'd been nervous that he might have changed his mind…might reject her. But now, as the nervousness passed, she found herself desperate for him.

They wound up on the bed, and thanks to a wave of his hand, Loki was without clothes within seconds. She trailed kisses down his chest, sensuously tasting his skin as she reached his rapidly hardening member. Natasha took him into her mouth and slowly began sucking, but soon, she felt him gently place a hand on her head. She released him and looked up, "You don't like it?"

"Eh heh heh heh, little spider," Loki drawled with a side-ways grin. "It's definitely not that… It's … it's just that I want you… I want to make love to you, Natalia."

Natasha couldn't help the blush that flushed not only her face, but her entire body. She crawled back up his body and straddled his hips before she began pressing hungry, wet kisses against his neck before he flipped them over, pinning her below him.

She licked her lips and stared up into his eyes as she felt his arousal press against her entrance. "Loki…" she breathed as her hips rolled upwards slightly.

"The way you say my name drives me crazy," the young god whispered as he suckled the soft spot behind her ear. "We should use something so you don't have to worry. I don't want you to be anxious. I only want to please you, my little spider." His dark emerald eyes sparkled down at her as he conjured a condom in his palm. "I care for you, very much, Natalia."

"I care for you too", she whispered as she took the condom and opened it. She reached between them and carefully rolled it down his shaft before placed her hands on his hips and guiding him toward her entrance.

Natasha let out a low moan as he entered her, "Yes…yes…"

He drove in and out of her for several moments before they moved positions. She got to her hands and knees and he knelt behind her, pistoning in and out of her eager body as her hands clenched around the bedding.

Their protection dulled the senses a little…she could tell because it took them both longer to climax, but when they did, they did so together before collapsing on the bed. The only noise in the room was the sound of their soft pants as they slowly recovered from their respective orgasms.

Natasha's period arrived a couple of days later, so she kept Loki busy with some oral sex and board games until her time passed. When it did, they began to settle into a state of domestic bliss. She asked that books and a television be provided for her friends, and, after Loki reluctantly agreed, they were delivered to them.

Natasha was happy…but she still felt like a prisoner. She wanted to get fresh air. Go for a run…

Right now, she was running nearly 12 miles on her treadmill inside of Loki's suite every day. She was getting cabin fever.

One evening, when Loki returned to his apartment, she was in the kitchen wearing a short nightie. She was completely bent over the counter, preoccupied with looking through pictures of new running shoes on her iPad. She glanced up at him with a slight smile before looking back down at her tablet, "Hey."

Loki grinned lustfully as he took in the sight of her in her negligee leaning over the counter. She was the most beautiful creature he had ever set eyes on. He moved behind her, resting his hands on her hips and his chin on her shoulder. "What are your gazing at so intently, little spider? Shoes?"

Natasha nodded as she zoomed in on a pair that had caught her eye, "I miss running outdoors…can't you just fit me with a shock collar or something that'll go off if I get too far away? I want fresh air…I need to run in the elements."

She let out a moan when she felt his groin press against her ass. She bit her bottom lip and smirked a bit, knowing she might be able to get him to agree more readily if she used sex.

Natasha turned around and unfastened his pants before turning back around and bending over the counter again, "I missed you today…"

She'd added a bit of huskiness to her voice as wriggled her hips slightly.

"Did you, little spider," Loki rasped as he rubbed his body teasingly against hers as he began nibbling and sucking along her neck. "Would it surprise you to know that I thought of little else but you all day."

Natasha moaned softly as his lips found their way to all of her favorite spots. He knew her too well. She dragged her tongue across her lips before she turned around and kissed his mouth before sitting up on the counter in front of him, wrapping her legs around his hips, "It's a pleasant surprise…"

Loki grinned into her kiss as she wrapped her legs around him. He had never felt such happiness as he had since that night that she returned to his chamber. He had thought he was in love with her before but he was even more so now. It was as if she had opened some deep well of feeling inside of him that he hadn't even known existed. She filled his heart to near bursting.

The young god quickly used his magic to sheath himself in a condom before impaling her with one sharp thrust. He felt her teeth nip against his neck and he growled in pleasure as he increased his rhythm. They moved together in a frenzied fervor until they reached that glorious moment of release.

Loki kissed her gently before his emerald eyes lit up with a mischievous sparkle as an idea popped into his head. He reached out and took her hand in his before he cast his spell. They reappeared in Central Park. Natasha was wearing a light green sweat suit and the sneakers that she had been admiring.

"Does this please you, my little spider?" he smiled.

Natasha must have looked like a confused puppy because she spun around in a quick circle before laughing at him, "I'm outside?"

She nodded eagerly, "Yes. Yes!"

She grabbed his face and kissed him on the lips, "Are you going to run with me? You should run. It clears your head. It's cathartic…really. And when you do it outside and you have the sun beating down on your face and the wind in your hair…it's really great."

Natasha had already begun stretching out her legs as she looked around and smiled giddily at him, clearly excited.

"Another time perhaps," Loki mused as his eyes drifted along her backside as she did her stretches. Even in those loose fitting sweats, she was turning him on. "I will wait for you here along that bench."

Natasha kissed him once more before taking off on a brisk jog around the park. Not wanting to keep him waiting too long, she did a quick 3 miles around the park, enjoying the warmth of the sun and the sounds of other people. It was about thirty minutes before she was returning to his side, panting. The shirt she wore was partially soaked in sweat, so she pulled it off, exposing her sports bra underneath.

"That was good…" she said with a smile as she wiped her face. "Now…I really need a bath."

Loki returned them to his chambers where Natasha immediately insisted on showing him how delightful bubble baths could be. He couldn't help but notice the extra glow about her since she had returned from her run. He suddenly realized how difficult it must be for her to be cooped up inside these walls all day, every day.

He was sitting on the couch as she snuggled against him, flipping through the channels of the TV apparently unable to locate anything to her liking by the speed with which the pictures flashed before his eyes.

"I'm going to advise your guard tomorrow that he is to take you anywhere you wish to in the city, little spider," Loki divulged suddenly as he twirled her loose curls languidly through his fingers. "Fresh air suits you and… I want you to be happy."

Natasha looked up into his eyes and smiled, "Really?" When he nodded the affirmative, she kissed him and moved further onto his lap, "You trust me…thank you. That means a lot."

She kissed him lovingly before softly nuzzling her nose with his and whispering his name reverently before shifting to straddle his lap. They made love again on the couch. Later, as they lay in the bed naked, Natasha lay on her side, idly tracing patterns over his chest with her fingertips, "I think I had sex more times than I ate today…" After they shared a laugh, she lay down beside him and sighed, "I'm going to see them tomorrow…are you still adamant about me staying away from Barton?"

Loki's mood immediately soured at the sound of his name. He hated the man. He couldn't help it. Barton had known her first, he had saved her life. She was indebted to him those had been her own words. The young god remembered them well. There was a bond between them and it made his entire being writhe in jealousy at the mere thought of it. He stood from the bed and pulled on the loose pajama pants that he used for sleeping. "Yes, I'm still adamant," he snipped as he moved toward the living room.

Natasha knew Loki hated Barton. He was jealous. It was plain and simple. Yes…she and Barton shared a bond, but obviously, that meant nothing right now. The archer was being kept in dungeon that made maximum security prisons look like daycare centers.

That fact seemed to be lost on the god of mischief.

She watched him walk into the living room and sighed before sitting up and pulling her robe on to follow him. She needed to placate him and put his mind at ease so that his mood would be improved. It wouldn't be pleasant for anyone if he stayed angry.

Natasha found him resting his forearm against one of the windows in the living room, staring out over the city. She wrapped her arms around him from behind and placed a lingering kiss against the space between his shoulder blades before just pressing herself against him, allowing the silence to prevail in the room.

She smiled a little, "Did you know I used to be a ballerina?"

"Yes… he mentioned it," Loki rasped as he continued to stare out the window. Barton had told him everything that he knew about every single one of the avengers when he had him enthralled by the gem held within his scepter. It was another sore point for the young god that everything he knew of her, he learned from the archer. Loki exhaled slowly as he tried to calm himself. She had done nothing wrong. She didn't deserve his ire. "I imagine you made a very beautiful ballerina, little spider." His voice softening as he turned in her arms and enclosed her face in his hands. "Perhaps one day you will dance for me."

Natasha leaned up and kissed him fully on the lips, "Funny you should say that…"

She pulled him over to the couch, then disappeared into the bedroom before returning in a tank top and shorts. She walked over the stereo and cued up a song from Swan Lake before she stepped into the middle of the open space in the living room in front of him.

Natasha began to dance, elegantly extending her limbs and straightening her back as she twirled and fluidly moved around the room. Her body bent and arched into impossibly graceful positions.

When the song ended, she bowed to him deeply, similar to the way an entertainer would bow in front of their king in a great hall.

"Brava! Brava!" Loki stood and clapped, his grin and dimples in full force as he smiled. Using his magic he let fall a flutter of rose petals to descend lightly about her like a spring shower. "Is that not how they say it? That was simply lovely. You were beautiful and amazing and so graceful. You are so talented, little spider, is it any wonder why I love you." The young god's smile fled from his face in the instant that those final words left his lips.

"You were truly magnificent," he quickly added as he moved toward the liquor cabinet. Hoping that if he kept talking she might not have even realized what he had said. "We should have a toast. Yes… a toast for a wonderful performance. I think… um… we have champagne but if not I can just poof it up." Loki knelt down in front of the cabinet as he searched its contents. He had never felt more mortified in his life.

Natasha laughed and blushed as he applauded her. She hadn't done an amazing job. It had been decades since she danced for anyone. She didn't like to admit it, but she still practiced every now and then when she was absolutely certain no one was watching her. It was something that helped her maintain her balance and flexibility.

When he said the "L" word, she froze. She'd heard it loud and clear, and she wasn't sure how to react. Natasha blinked rapidly as he quickly walked over to the liquor cabinet and knelt in front of it.

God…she wasn't sure she was ready to say it out loud. She knew she felt it…but she wasn't sure she had the guts to say it out loud. Hell, she could clearly tell he hadn't actually meant to say it himself.

She slowly walked over to where he knelt and softly ran her fingers over the top of his hair, causing him to look up at her, "…there's some things I hope I don't have to say for you to know it's true…but I guess there are some things people want to hear…" Natasha let out a breath, "I love you too."

"I can't imagine why," Loki stood up as he threaded his fingers into her hair. "Especially for a woman as intelligent and crafty as you. But if you must have a defect in your reasoning then I'm glad it is with me." His lips upturned in a sideways smile. "I love you so much, Natalia," he whispered as he pulled her into a heated kiss.

Natasha kissed him as he slowly backed her up into a nearby wall before pulling her shorts down. She pulled down his pajama pants before he picked her up and entered her in one, delicious thrust.

She jumped slightly and gasped his name as she threw her head back, "I love you…"

Hearing those words pushed him over the edge as he pulled in a lungful of air. His strokes increased, rocking inside of her over and over as he growled against her neck "Mine… you're all mine." His lips latching onto her throat as he sucked and nipped at her skin, determined to leave a mark of their encounter that would last for weeks. He could feel her body shuddering in completion, bringing him with her.

Loki gently let her legs fall from around his hips as he kissed her gently. He rested his forehead against hers as he stared into her sapphire eyes. "I love you, Natalia. I rather enjoy saying that, little spider." he winked.

Natasha moaned contentedly as she looked into his eyes, "This is wild…"

Despite the euphoria that resulted from their declarations of love, Natasha was continuously haunted by the images of her friends…and Clint locked away. They didn't deserve to be there. And if they did, she belonged there too. Guilt gnawed at her, and she continued to think of how Clint was doing. Every time his name was mentioned, Loki turned into "old Loki". Embittered, angry, jealous, callous…she feared the worst for her former partner. She wondered of her connection with Clint made Loki treat him worse than the others.

She needed to see him.

During her biweekly visit to the cell, her guard waited outside of the holding area while she sat with her friends. Soon, she was all business and asking about Clint, announcing her plans to

"Alright…where's Barton's cell?"

"Down one level. You could use the pipe system to get down there, I guess" answered Bruce.

She glanced at the pipes he referred to before moving her chair and backing up a few steps before she took a running leap to grab onto them and scale down.

Natasha landed on top of his cell and jumped down in front of it.

"Tasha…?" he asked, incredulously.

She smiled, but couldn't stop the sadness in her voice as she pressed a palm against the glass, "Clint…"

"What are you doing here?" he asked quickly looking around.

"I was worried."

"Likewise…I heard you made a deal with the devil" he said sadly.

Natasha sighed, "It's much more complicated than that. I just needed to know you were ok."

"As ok as I can be…"

"What are you doing down here?!" Yelled a guard. She was caught.

A few moments later, she was presented to Loki…who was told where she had snuck off to.

Natasha knew this wouldn't end well…


	6. Chapter 6

Loki sat in his throne room listening absently to two of his appointed delegates filling him in on some petty dispute between their territories in the middle east.

"Tell them they have two days to settle their differences or my armies will lay waste to both lands all together." He remarked briskly as his eyes gazed over at the large clock that adorned the far wall. The doors burst open and to his shock the guard was pulling Natasha into the room, his hand gripped tightly around her arm.

"Get your hands off her before I kill you where you stand," Loki seethed as he flew from his seat in a fury. The guard let go of her immediately as he knelt on the floor, his head bowed submissively.

"Sorry, your Majesty, but she was found sneaking into the lower dungeons," the soldier entreated. "I only meant to bring her to you."

"The lower dungeons," Loki murmured as his dark emerald gaze fell to the Black Widow. "You mean Barton's cell?" His gaze narrowed and he could feel his blood begin to boil. "CLEAR THIS ROOM NOW!" His voice thundered across the chamber as everyone made a mad dash for the doors.

"You just couldn't stay away from him could you?" he bit off evilly. "So how did you enjoy your reunion, little spider?"

Fear struck Natasha's heart as those in the room fled, staring at her as if this would be the last time she would be seen alive.

When they were alone, Loki was practically trembling in rage. She lowered her eyes briefly, "I just wanted to see that he was ok with my own eyes…it wasn't a reunion…"

"You needed to see him," Loki seethed, the word 'needed' slithering from his tongue with venom. "I told you that I wouldn't harm him or any of the rest of your little band. So what your saying is that you didn't believe me." The young god's fists clenched at his side. He felt like breaking something, preferably the archer's skull. He stormed towards a table along the far wall and gripped the edge forcefully as he stared blankly out the window in front of him. "After the words we exchanged last night the first thing you do is to go to him?"

He heard her speak his name softly and he grabbed the potted plant that adorned the table and hurtled it across the room shattering the ceramic bowl into a thousand pieces.

"Don't you dare try and placate me!" he growled. "We had a deal and you broke it. So I hope you enjoyed your visit because you won't be seeing any of them ever again."

Natasha jumped backwards as he threw the rather large plant across the room. She was then reminded that he was no man. He was a god with a physical strength she couldn't match. And he could end her life at any time if he so chose.

Right now, he looked pretty damn close.

She wasn't sure if speaking would make her predicament any worse, so she tried to follow after him as he stormed from the room, but he barked orders to his guards to have her taken back to their penthouse.

Natasha waited for him for hours. She worked out, took a bath, then lay down on the bed to wait for him.

It was well past midnight by the time she heard the door open. She sat up, hoping that her attire…or lack thereof, would at least keep her from receiving a brunt of his anger.

She wore a forest green negligee with a sheer lace top. The outline of her breasts and nipples could clearly be seen through the fabric, and she sincerely hoped that it saved her ass tonight by enticing him enough to calm his anger.

Rage seemed to consume the young god, so much so that he had locked himself away in his throne room, long after the evening came and went. He didn't trust himself to return to his penthouse. He was afraid that he might do something in his anger that he would regret.

She had deliberately gone against his wishes after all the concessions that he had made for her. She had gone off to see him in secret and obviously if she had not been found than she would have kept if from him. What else had she kept from him. How many lies has she told him? She asked him to trust her and then she does this.

Loki walked through the door of their chambers. It was pitch black, the only illumination was a soft light coming from the bedroom. He walked through the archway to find her sitting on the bed. She was wearing his favorite color, in a deliciously skimpy negligee, his gaze drifted to her throbbing tips, the outline of which could easily be seen through the lace. He could feel his body harden instantly at the sight. Damn, she was beautiful, he mused to himself as he licked his lips subconsciously. Angry or not there was no denying how badly he wanted her.

There was a small voice in the back of his mind warning him. Isn't this the Black Widow's expertise. Are you going to just let her wrap you around her little finger until its you that's in the cell and her precious avengers who are free?

"You look like a woman who is very intent on seducing someone," Loki drawled as he moved further into the room.

"Just intent on calming you enough so that you won't throw anything else…" she said softly, looking down. "I've noticed that you seem to be in a better mood when I'm mostly naked…"

Natasha stood up and walked toward him, pulling at her fingers as she bit her lip, "Look, I know you're upset with me…and I don't blame you completely because you're a god. You're a king. You expect everyone to blindly follow your orders…including me. Well, I'm used to having free will. I'm used to having the right to follow my instincts and do what it took to put my mind at ease…for better or worst. My SHIELD file proves that. I would have done the same thing had it been ANY of my teammates. If you kept me from Tony, Bruce, Steve…I would need to see them to make sure they were alright too. This whole, obedience thing isn't my forte, Loki. I just started getting allowed outdoors…I have absolutely no one to talk to outside of you, and you're always busy…this is a HUGE adjustment for me. I'm a woman who is used to leaping off of buildings and taking cover from explosions…and I've been playing Suzy Homemaker for you, waiting around all day for you to fuck me. Do you know that I cleaned base boards yesterday?! I didn't even do my own laundry before this all went down and I cleaned BASE BOARDS, Loki. So…yes. I did really want to make sure my ENTIRE team was ok. But I guess the adrenaline rush was also pretty enticing."

"So let me see if I understand you, little spider," Loki gibed as he trailed a finger down her arm. "What this all boils down to is that you were bored and you don't trust me?"

Natasha crossed her arms and furrowed her eyebrows, "After everything I just said…after talking until I was blue in the face, THAT'S what you got from what I said?!"

This was likely going to turn into a regular couple's argument, and neither one of them were experienced in relationships enough to keep it from melting down into a huge, ridiculously stupid fight, so she let out a breath and held up her hands, "I am not used to having my friends locked in dungeons. I am not used to being told where I can go and who I see. I understand that you feel a certain way about Bar—-him. But I'm yours now, Loki. I told you that I loved you and I mean it. He's my friend. I can't just flip a switch and erase everything. What can I do to let you know that I'm yours and no one elses?"

Loki could feel the ice forming in his veins as she spoke about the archer. His anger was palpable. He had thought himself calmed before he entered the room but he realized now that he was mistaken. "I know you're mine. And the fool whoever thinks to touch you, won't live very long after his mistake, I promise you that." His dark green eyes held no warmth and his voice was frigid as he loomed over her. "Do you love him? I asked you once before but you just gave me one of your cheeky responses that didn't really answer the question. Love is for children, do you remember, little spider?"

Natasha's arms dropped at her side as she stared up into his eyes and took a step back. She did love Barton. Not as much as a lover as a friend in their recent history…but the answer would be yes.

"Why do you need to know?! I love him…as a FRIEND, Loki. Maybe it was something more once, but…not now."

"I see," Loki remarked coldly as his jealousy shot up about a zillion degrees. He didn't really care about the 'friend' part that she conveniently added on. He didn't hear much past the first three words. 'I love him'. "Well, there will be no future reunions between the two of you. I am having him moved from here permanently."

Natasha's eyes widened as she moved toward him again, "What?! Why?! Even if I did see him again, what could that do?! Nothing! You have him locked away! Are you trying to punish me for having a past and for having feelings before you?! You want a part of me no one's ever had before…well, I'm sorry I can't give that to you."

She felt the burn of tears in her eyes and turned away from him, crossing her arms over her chest. She suddenly felt very exposed.

"I don't understand why you have to punish him…or me, for that matter. If you want something special that Barton doesn't have with me…let's make new memories, let's do something together….find something that's just you and I. I don't care what it is, please just let go of this jealousy! I won't sneak down and see him again…just…stop."

"All this emotion you have for him," Loki snapped as he clenched his fists at his side. "I daresay I've never seen you so upset. I didn't realize the prospect of not being in the same city as your little circus boy would be deemed as such a punishment to you. However, did you stay away from him for as long as you did? Or was this not the first time you snuck away to him, maybe its just the first time that you got caught."

Natasha furrowed her eyebrows as a lone tear slid down her cheek. She softly shook her head, "No. No. Why does everything have to be so black and white?! Why would you try to make me choose? It's not fair! Why would you force me to do that?! Do you even really love me? Is this what love is to you? Isolating me from the world…keeping me locked in the tower for your pleasure and eyes only. No friends. No socializing. Just spend my days waiting for you to come back here…"

"Don't twist my words," Loki retorted. "I have given you more freedom. Have I not? Let's not be naive. What would happen if your friends were free? Because that is what you want, is it not? Don't tell me that you don't realize what would happen to me if that day ever came."

"Goddammit, Loki! This is hard for me! Yes, you've given me freedoms, but compared to what? A regular prisoner? I can't have friends. I can't even run to the store for my own tampons! And I know that the Avengers being completely free would be bad for you…I just…I don't know…"

She shook her head and sat down on the bed, wearily running a hand through her hair, "I'm tired…I can't keep arguing with you over this. You will never understand where I'm coming from…"

Natasha sighed and laid down, "I'm going to sleep."

But she didn't…not really. She lay there on her side, staring at the wall for hours, unsure of the predicament she now faced. All because she'd been stupid enough to fall in love with him.

Loki watched her lay down on the bed with her back facing him. A part of him wanted to slip in next to her and place his arm around her and forget about everything that happened this evening. But the larger part of him was still too angry.

The young god left the penthouse completely and spent the rest of the evening walking aimlessly around the city. Perhaps, she was right. There was nothing he could do to change the fact that she met the archer before him or that she loved him first. She was with Loki now. And she loved him. He needed to concentrate on that. Which was much easier said than done. He kept thinking of the things she said.

_"You want a part of me no one's ever had before…well, I'm sorry I can't give that to you."_

_Let's just live…let's create new memories. _

He could not deny the truth in those words. Aside from a time machine there was no way for him to have a part of her that the archer did not. The bond between them was one he couldn't break nor could he duplicate it. But there were other bonds that could be made. He thought suddenly. A part of her that no one else has. Yes, that's it, he thought with a mischievous smirk along his lips. He could give her something that Barton never did. He could have a part of her that no one else has. Create new memories, yes. They could create a baby.

Loki returned to their chambers with a renewed spirit. Yes, a baby would bind them forever. They would be a family. As he walked into the living room he noticed that it was rather quiet. He figured that she probably went out for an early morning run. She hated being cooped up here so now that he had given her more freedom he was certain that she was probably just out taking advantage of it.

A frantic knock came at the door and when he opened it Natasha's daytime guard came rushing in. Loki realized immediately what was wrong.

"Why is Natasha not with you?" Loki seethed as he took a menacing step toward the man.

"I… I… lost her." the guard whimpered. "I thought perhaps she came back here."

"You… You lost her? Exactly how does one lose a woman that they are supposed to be guarding?" Loki bit off angrily as he grabbed the man by his ear and pulled him toward him forcing him to his knees as the man cried out in pain. "Tell me where she was the last time you saw her. I want every detail that tiny little brain of yours can muster and you better pray that I find her quickly because however long it takes me is exactly how long your torture is going to last."

Natasha has gone out with her guard for an early morning walk through the neighborhood when she suddenly had the urge to start buying things. First, the bagel shop. Then, the florist. Then, a crowded coffee shop for her favorite espresso. Then, a newly opened boutique.

She must've accidentally lost track of her guard in the crowds that had gathered in front of the book store they passed by. Some famous author was signing copies an security had roped off a section of side walk. Natasha went one way, her guard went another, and before she knew it, she didn't see him anymore.

She couldn't bring herself to care as she slowly perused the racks of the artsy little clothing boutique. She bought herself some new maxi dresses, then spotted some shirts that she knew would look great on Loki.

Natasha leisurely made her way back home with her bags in hand, and walked into the penthouse just in time to see Loki tossing her guard across the room. The guy looked like he'd already taken quite a beating.

She immediately felt guilty, but a part of her didn't blame Loki for being pissed. If she didn't really love him, she would have been long gone by now and it was all because the guard hasn't kept close tabs on her…hence his job title: GUARD.

Natasha started stuttering apologies as Loki snapped at the guard, telling him to get out. He limped out, leaving them alone. She suddenly felt a little nervous, but when she saw the look on his face, her nervousness melted away.

Loki seemed stunned when she came waltzing into the door and barely gave her a chance to set down her bags before he wrapped her up in a desperate embrace.

"Hey…I'm ok…I got bagels…oh, and I got you some shirts I think you're going to love", she said, kissing his cheek and moving to set the bags down.

Loki had never felt so relieved in his life than when she walked through the door. "Shirts?" he gaped as he reluctantly let her out of his hold so that she could tend to her bags. He watched as she pulled out a few shirts but couldn't contain himself as he tugged her back into his embrace and claimed her mouth in a sensuous kiss. "I was afraid that maybe you had enough of me after last night."

Natasha kissed him back and stared at him for a few moments before shaking her head, "I told you I love you, I mean it. I wouldn't just leave you. I mean, you drive me crazy, but…you've got my heart…as dark and broken as it is, it's yours."

She pulled his shirts out and laid them on the couch, "I thought they'd go well with your eyes…" Natasha glanced up at him as she moved back toward the kitchen, "You still upset about last night?"

Loki strutted towards the arrangement of shirts along the sofa. There was one that was a dark green, another that was grey and a deep purple. "I am not as angry as I once was. And I have made sure that it cannot happen again so let's forget about it. Shall I try them on?" He turned back toward her as he began to unbutton his shirt. "Which is your favorite?"

Natasha sighed, but sucked it up and decided to leave that discussion for another day. She'd figure out how to approach it without him biting her head off…

She turned around and picked up the dark green one, removing the tags and shaking it out a bit, "This one…as soon as I saw it, I thought of your eyes."

Natasha watched him put the shirt on and stepped forward, helping him button it up. She smiled a little, "You should try rolling your shirts up to your elbows…really sexy."

"Is it?" He inquired with a devilish smirk as he preceded to do as she suggested. "Like this, little spider? How do I look?" He inclined his head slightly so he could run his lips along the pulse point of her neck before moving upward towards her ear. "You should try on the purple. You always look so delicious in my shirts."

Natasha moaned as she felt his lips on her neck. Her pulse immediately sped up as her body reacted to his touch. It barely took a second for him to get this reaction from her. There had to be some magic at work here…never before had she wanted a man so much and been so desperate for his touch regardless of the time or place.

She smirked as she turned her head to hungrily kiss his lips as she slowly unbuttoned her shirt and yanked it off before unbuttoning her jeans.

Natasha watched him stare at her as she stepped back and stripped out of her clothes…all of them, including underwear. She started to reached for his shirt, but his lightening quick reflexes caught her wrist.

"I thought you wanted to see it on me…"

"After," Loki grinned as he pulled her body flush against his, falling back onto the sofa so that she laid on top of him as he moved his hands up and down her luscious curves. His lips devouring her breasts, suckling the tortured peak as her neck tipped back. The soft moans she made drove him insane. No woman had ever made him feel this way before. It was if the entire world disappeared and nothing else existed but her. "You're all that matters to me, my little spider, you're all I want." He groaned as her hands began working on the buckle of his pants. "I will never let you leave me."

Natasha quickly divested him of his clothes before climbing back on top of him, connecting their lips for another hungry kiss. She felt his hardness brush against her entrance and whispered against his lips, "Love…condom."

Loki crushed his lips against hers greedily. He wanted to make her his. He wanted to get her pregnant. He had made up his mind already but when he found her gone from his home he had become even more set on the idea. The thought that she could one day decide to go off and never come back made him feel even more desperate than he had the night before. A child would bond them forever.

He decided to pretend that he hadn't heard her. He had gotten her to agree to be with him without the use of anything twice before and he was quite determined to make this moment the third. Reaching his hand between them he began rubbing her most sensitive spot as he moved his mouth to that soft place behind her ear. He knew exactly how to touch her. She was an instrument that he loved to play. Making her squeal in delight was his favorite thing to do and right now he was going to use his knowledge of her gorgeous frame to his full advantage.

"I love you, Natalia," he murmured. His breath whispering along her ear. "I want to feel you." He arched upward, rubbing his body teasingly against hers as she moaned unabashedly at his attentions. "I need you, my little spider."

Natasha moaned and whimpered as his hands and lips caressed every one of her hot spots. She didn't know pleasure like this before he came along. Every time they made love, it felt like she was lost within a haze of sheer ecstasy. Rational thought always took a back seat to heat of the moment actions when his lips were on her body, and this time was no different.

Natasha tried to work through the fog in her brain as she remembered the date, then tried to remember when her last period ended…three weeks ago. They might be ok…but just in case, she knew she'd have to issue a warning.

"Alright love…I'll just move off when you cum…" she whispered against his lips as she sank down onto his length. Her head fell back with a sensual moan as she felt him settle deep inside of her. Slowly, she started to roll her hips against his, whispering his name reverently as she wrapped her arms around his neck and trailed wet kisses up and down his jaw line.

"By the nines, Natalia… you feel so good," Loki gasped as their bodies joined. He could never get over how perfectly she fit around him, how incredible she felt. He thrust upward as she arched to meet his every motion. He could feel the shiver in her body that he knew meant she was getting close as he flipped her beneath him. He set a pounding rhythm determined to make her lose all sense of reason as she rose to meet each thrust. "Mine… my Natalia… always," he whispered huskily against her throat. "I love you."

Natasha cried out as she arched her back beneath him, eagerly pressing her chest flush against his.

She felt the white hot, blinding pleasure of her orgasm overtake her as she screamed his name and tensed beneath him, her body clenching around his.

He felt her convulse around him as she reached her peak and abandoned himself to the pleasure. "Valhalla," He groaned in blissful agony as he felt his hot seed spill into her. He struggled for his breath as he nuzzled against her neck. "You are my Valhalla… I love you."

"I love you too…" she murmured softly. Her body was so weakened by pleasure, she didn't even realize what he'd done.

Her body shivered for several moments after, basking in the afterglow of her orgasm as she slowly floated down from her high. Thanks to the combination of intense physical pleasure and the sleepless night, her eyelids began to droop as she snuggled into his chest.

Before she knew it, she fell asleep.

Loki used his magic to move them into their bedroom as he watched her sleep. He laid his hand gently along her stomach, moving his fingers in slow circles as he watched the rise and fall of her breathing. He knew in all probability that it would take more than one time to conceive but he had made up his mind. And as with everything else in his life he would not give up until he got what he wanted.

It was nearly twenty minutes later before his little spider began to show signs of wakening. Starting with a restless shift of her body until he noticed her eyelids begin to flutter open.

"Did you enjoy your nap, little spider." Loki beamed down at her.

Natasha smiled sleepily up at him and moaned in approval before snaking a hand around his neck and pulling his lips down to her for a slow, lazy kiss.

"Mmmmhmm…I did", she murmured as she stroked his face. "I thought you'd be too busy to spend all morning in bed with me…"

"I missed you so much last night," Loki grinned as he ran his fingers along her inner thigh. Happy that she had woken up in such a good mood. He had been a little worried that she might be upset with him that he hadn't pulled out. "I intend to spend the whole day with you, my little spider. Tell me what would you like to do?" He trailed kisses along her stomach as he moved his way up her body.

Natasha giggled as his lips brushed against her stomach, hitting an especially ticklish spot. When his mouth finally returned to hers, she kissed him passionately before looking up into his eyes, "Take me out to lunch…then let's just go for a walk…then, we can come back here and you can have me as an afternoon snack."

She laughed at the wolfish grin that formed on his lips as she hopped up from the bed and headed to the shower. An hour later, they were strolling down the street. He had his arm draped around her shoulder, and she had hers wrapped around his waist. Her other hand was linked in his as he pulled her close, pressing random kisses against her temple.

"I have a proposition for you, my little spider," Loki grinned as he placed another kiss against her temple and squeezed her closer as they walked along the busy street. "I've been thinking of what you said… about how you're use to being busy and more active… what if you were to work for me? Believe it or not there is actually a daily influx of people who join the ranks of my armies. You could help train them in combat. You are more than qualified."

The young god stared at her curiously, her expression was so blank that he couldn't read her at all. He had come up with the idea while she was taking her nap. He didn't like the thought of her being unhappy. But there was also another reason. He thought that perhaps if her time was occupied during the day that she would be less likely to think of her comrades that were still held captive. He wanted her all to himself.

Natasha raised a brow and glanced up at him before slowly nodding as she took in his proposition. She was never a "good guy". When she told him that she didn't weep over failed regimes, she was being honest. She didn't care whose side she was on, as long as she wasn't getting more blood on her hands.

She leaned up and kissed his lips, "Sounds good. I think I'd like to have something to do during the day…."

They went to a small bistro and sat down in the corner of the restaurant, directly across from a baby girl and her mother. Natasha didn't notice until several moments into their meal that the baby had developed a fascination with her. She smiled at the baby and briefly covered her own eyes with her napkin before uncovering in them in a short, but pleasant game of peek-a-boo before she casually went back to her meal.

Loki watched Natasha curiously as she gazed at the baby at the table across from them. "That little one likes you," the young god mused. "She has good taste." He supposed this was as good a time as any to see if her thoughts on the subject had changed. "Do you ever imagine yourself wanting one of your own again?"

Natasha looked up at him as an unreadable expression briefly flashed across her eyes. It was part hurt, part wanting and part fear. She slowly shook her head and looked back down at her menu.

She hated talking about her past, especially that specific incident.

"No. Not really."

"I'm sorry that you lost your daughter," Loki divulged as his dark green eyes gazed at her warmly. "I didn't mean to bring up sad thoughts. Forgive me my foolishness, little spider, I should have known better." He decided the straight forward method would not be very helpful in this case. She would feel differently once she was holding her own child, he was sure.

Natasha brushed off the conversation by quickly changing the subject by asking him if he wanted a glass of wine. They enjoyed a slow, intimate lunch before they left the restaurant, then walked around a bit more before returning to the penthouse.

As soon as he closed the door behind them, she pinned him to it and began feverishly kissing him as she unbuttoned his shirt. She was just about to unfasten his pants when a knock on that very door made her stop in mid-kiss. She groaned against his lips and backed away.

"You do have a world to run…"

Loki huffed audibly at the intrusion as he buttoned his shirt, leaving the first three undone. Whoever this was he was going to make certain that it didn't take long.

"Why are you disturbing me?" the young god snapped as he opened the door to find one of his Lieutenants standing in front of him.

"There was a slight issue with the…," the soldier took a slight glance at Natasha before continuing cautiously. "transfer, Your Majesty." Loki sighed and shook his head, his dark emerald eyes narrowing in his displeasure. He had nothing but fools at his disposal. He wanted Barton gone from the city. How difficult could it be to move one prisoner?

"I will be there in a moment," Loki rasped. The Lieutenant bowed before exiting the room quickly. "I'm sorry that we were interrupted, my little spider, I will be back quickly I promise. I'm quite starved for my afternoon snack," he winked as he leaned in to give her a kiss.

Natasha kissed him back, watching him leave. Her curiosity certainly was piqued by this "transfer". She knew it had something to do with Clint, and she was immediately concerned.

Where was he taking him?

She opened the apartment door soon after Loki left and found her guard standing there. "Where did he go?"

"His office. Anything you need?" he asked, crossing his arms.

"Take me there. I need to talk to him."

The guard looked a little confused and lost, so Natasha snapped at him, "You've taken me to him about a hundred times in there. Why not now? Lets go!"

Despite the fact that she was a prisoner, the guards knew better than to treat her like one. She wasn't sure what Loki had told them, but even they seemed confused by her status. They had to take some of her orders and be at her disposal if she ever needed something or wanted to leave the premises.

The guard led her to the doors that led to the waiting room attached to Loki's office. He sat down outside as she walked in, stopping to listen at the office doors.

"Explain to me again why I am here." Loki seethed as he leaned against the ornate desk behind him. This office was where he worked when he was dealing with the day to day issues of his new realm. He saved the throne room for the more expansive matters that required a more regal air.

"When we opened the doors for the transfer the prisoner attempted to escape," the Lieutenant began nervously.

"For your sake, I assume his attempt was a failure or you will not be leaving this room in the land of the living," the young god drawled with an evil smirk. It was always good to remind his subordinates that their lives were in his hands.

"Yes, Your Majesty, he was subdued and has been sedated," the soldier advised, the relief that he could say those words was evident on his face.

"Then what is the problem?" Loki snipped. He did not appreciate his time being wasted. He wanted to return to Natasha as soon as possible.

"The guards were a little over zealous in containing him, Your Majesty," the Lieutenant advised. His voice quaking slightly as he continued. "They nearly overdosed him. Doctor Jung does not recommend that he travel until he is more fully awake."

"I want him gone today," Loki ordered. "Send the doctor along with him that should be sufficient enough of a precaution. It will displease me greatly if he is still here in the morning. Do we understand each other?"

"Yes, your majesty." the Lieutenant bowed in agreement.

Natasha quickly rushed back to her guard and had him return her to the penthouse. Less than five minutes after her return, Loki walked in. She tried to force a smile onto her face as his arms encircled her waist and he began kissing her neck.

"Is everything alright? It sounded serious…what's being transferred?" she asked curiously. She knew the answers, she just wanted to see if he would lie.


	7. Chapter 7

"It is now, little spider," Loki grinned as he moved his lips slowly along her neck. She had the most delicious skin, he mused as he suckled along her collarbone. "Nothing serious just moving a prisoner to his new quarters." He slid his hand up under her shirt, cupping her breast over the lacy fabric of her bra. "Now I believe you promised me an afternoon snack." He breathed huskily as his dark green eyes gazed at her lustfully.

Natasha knew he was talking about Barton, but she also knew that his mood was volatile in relation to the archer, and any mention of him would send him into a tailspin of bitterness and jealousy.

She closed her eyes and moaned softly as she felt his lips press against the skin of her neck. His hands ghosted over her skin, and soon, they were laying on the bed, naked. She was so lost in a daze of ecstasy, she wasn't sure if they actually walked there, or if he used his magic to put them there.

Natasha was used to him conjuring condoms and putting them on prior to sex, so when she lay on her stomach on the bed and waited for him to take his place behind her, she didn't feel a specific need to remind him of their need for protection.

Loki left a trail of kisses down her back as he positioned himself behind her. She was so beautiful and the sight of her slender back and sexy bottom was more than enough to send his body into a tailspin of lust. He knew she would assume that he would use his magic to bring forth a condom as he usually did. But he decided that he would test the waters and pretend to forget. Perhaps, she would be too caught up in the moment to think of it herself. If not there was always plan B. The young god was nothing if not determined.

Loki set about turning his little spider into a frenzy of need as he lift her hips, sliding his fingers along her clit with slow, knowing strokes as her hands fisted the sheets and she squealed in pure carnal delight. "I need you, Natalia… by the nines, I need you." A growl rolled from his lips in response to the soft cry of his name from her lips as he eased himself into her.

Natasha gasped and lifted off of the mattress slightly as she felt him enter her. She immediately knew that he was bare inside of her. It felt far too good for him to have a condom on. She could feel every ripple…every pulse….every delicious inch.

She grabbed a fistful of sheets and moaned, "Loki…are you wearing…are you wearing something? You're gonna have to pull out, baby…"

Natasha reached behind her and placed a hand on the back of his head as he leaned forward to bury his face in her neck, sucking on the soft flesh. She seemed to keep his "love bites" on her neck and chest at all times.

By the nines, it felt so good to be inside of her like this. He nipped at her neck as her body shuttered beneath him. "Say my name, Natalia," he whispered in his silky drawl as he increased his thrusts, nearly pounding her into the mattress as her moans got louder and more animalistic. "Tell me you want me."

Natasha gasped as her hips jerked backwards in tune to his relentless thrusts. When he demanded she say his name, she felt as though it was a next to impossible task. When he was inside of her, she barely remembered how to breathe. Verbalization was a task within itself.

She cried out as he thrust harder, making it harder for her to catch her breath, "Oh…Loki…I want you…I need you…oh…god…Loki…I love you!"

"Natalia," he gasped in breathless urgency as they climaxed together, their bodies convulsing in frenzy of simultaneous explosions. He collapsed onto his back at her side, his breath rushing in and out in a frantic rhythm. He tilted his head to look at her as his fingers caressed the small of her back. "I love you."

"I love you too…"

Natasha lay there for several moments, panting. Had he put on a condom or was he supposed to pull out? She couldn't remember…

Loki had told her that he didn't want children, so she was certain that he would take any and every precaution necessary to prevent a pregnancy.

A week later, Natasha's period started. She exited the bathroom, casually remarking that she needed to go to the store to get some more tampons as she walked toward the closet to get dressed.

Loki's gaze narrowed as he watched the Black Widow move towards her closet. He supposed he shouldn't be surprised. They had only been together twice without protection. There was only so many times he could pretend to forget before it sparked her suspicions. It was time for him to take desperate measures. After all, no birth-control was a 100% effective. He would just have to twist the odds even more in his favor.

Natasha thought that the look of annoyance/disappointment in his eyes was due to the fact that he realized that they wouldn't be having sex for the next five to seven days.

When Natasha's period was over, they resumed their vigorous schedule of sex, and she started her new job, training his newest recruits. She tried not to liken it to the Red Room, but she was still exceptionally strict and brutal with her trainees.

Their new busy schedules kept them apart for up to 12 hours each day, and Loki was as amorous as ever, always looking for an excuse to make love…no matter where they were. After a long day of training and ruling, Loki backed her into a dark hallway and was pinning her against the wall, pressing kisses to her neck. She giggled and tried to push him away, "Loki! Someone will see!"

"I can take care of that," Loki whispered huskily in her ear. "No one will see but they can still hear so you'll need to try and be quiet, little spider." He wrapped her legs around his waist while he cast the invisibility spell and dispersed their clothes in one fluid motion. He sheathed himself magically as he sank into her. She gasped. "Shhhh, quiet, remember," he grinned against her lips as he slowly pulled himself almost out of her before slamming her back into the wall. He had been conjuring defective birth control for weeks and this evening was no different.

Natasha bit down on her bottom lip to stifle a loud moan as he slammed into her. She ended up having to cover her own mouth as he thrust into her, quickly driving them both over the edge of a powerful, shuddering orgasm.

Weeks passed, and they settled into a schedule of a normal couple. On Saturday and Sunday mornings, Loki would accompany her to the park, where she'd go for a run. On this particular morning, she wasn't feeling her best, but she insisted that the run would help her out.

Loki waited on her usual bench, and after she hit mile two at the park, she slowed to a stop as her stomach began churning. She nearly tripped over a woman walking her dog before she made it to a trash can to vomit.

She took a few moments to collect herself and bought a water from a random concessions vendor before walking back to where Loki sat. She didn't bother to tell him about her nausea, and instead cited the heat for cutting her run short.

A few days later, they were in bed making love. Loki leaned down to gently take her nipple in his mouth, but as soon as he did, she jumped and hissed in pain, jerking away as she covered her breast, "Ow…"

"Are you alright, Natalia?" Loki asked, his dark green eyes filled with concern. "I didn't mean to hurt you. Is your time coming already." He recalled that sometimes she complained of her breasts being tender during that time of the month. The thought that she might be getting her period depressed him utterly. He had hoped that it wouldn't take longer than a few weeks to conceive.

Natasha nodded and murmured, "Yeah" without really thinking before claiming his lips for a passionate kiss as they continued making love. Later, as she was showering (and fighting off another wave of nausea) she began calculating when she was supposed to expect her period.

By the time she was brushing her teeth, she realized that she was supposed to get it ten days prior…

No…there was no way. Her periods weren't always regular. It was completely possible that her body was just being stupid. She refused to acknowledge the mere possibility of pregnancy. They'd been careful since her last period.

She ignored her symptoms and her lack of period for another two weeks…before she started craving ice, ice cream and all things cold. She practically threw a fit because her guard brought her the wrong flavored Italian ice.

Loki walked through the door of their penthouse just in time to witness Natasha yelling at her guard as she shoved an iced dessert into his hand. She told him to bring back the right one or else. The man moved swiftly past him, obviously in a hurry to satisfy her wishes. The young god raised an eyebrow at her quizzically but decided not to say anything. She had been having strange mood swings lately. He assumed that she was having her period. Although, she hadn't said it outright but the last few days she had not be reciprocating of his advances.

He strutted forward and gave her a soft kiss on the forehead as the phone rang. Loki moved quickly to the kitchen to answer it. Though, he immediately wished that he hadn't when he discovered that it was concerning the archer. The man was being impossibly difficult since his move.

"If he wants to starve himself then let him," Loki snapped into the phone. "He doesn't get to make demands on me." He hung up the phone and moved toward the refrigerator to get himself something to drink. "If the guard is taking too long for you, little spider, just let me know what it is you wanted and I can conjure it up for you this minute." He remarked as he turned his attentions toward the Black Widow.

Natasha ran a hand through her hair and moved toward the refrigerator, standing in front of it, basking in the cold air, "That feels better…it's like an oven in here.."

She sighed, "I wanted lemon Italian Ice and that….fuckwad brought me lemon-raspberry. It's not that fucking hard to get a fucking order for Italian ice right, is it?"

Natasha slammed the refrigerator door shut and opened the freezer, grabbing a handful of ice out before she began sucking on one while rubbing the other over her neck. During the past week or so, it felt like her mood had a direct correlation with her body temperature. Every time she got angry or frustrated, her body temperature went up, and lately, being hot irked her in the worst of ways.

She glanced at him, "Was that phone call about Clint?"

Loki turned away from her as he secretly cursed himself. He should have controlled his temper when he was on the phone. That definitely hadn't been something that he had wanted her to overhear.

"That phone call doesn't concern you," the young god remarked offhandedly as he moved toward the sofa. "Let us leave it at that, little spider."

Natasha took a breath in an attempt to calm herself as she continued rubbing ice on her neck and chest. She fanned herself and grumbled, "of course it doesn't", before she walked over to him.

"I suppose that if I asked who I had to fuck to get some Italian ice around here, you'd raise your hand, huh?"

She sat down on his lap as he conjured the treat and a spoon. Natasha smiled at him and took it from his hand before she started eating it, "God…that's good…better…much better."

"It isn't really that hot in here, little spider." Loki puzzled as he watched her devour the frozen treat that he had conjured for her. He placed his hand up underneath her shirt as he let his true nature take over for just a minute. He could feel the change taking place along his fingers, to his wrist but he held it back so it went no further. If he gazed underneath her blouse he would see the blue tinge on his skin. She blinked down at him as the coldness from his hand spread along her abdomen. "Being a Frost Giant has some advantages," he winked as he focused his concentration on keeping the change from going any further. But it became too much for him as he quickly released it and let his hands return to his Aesir form.

Natasha let out a breath. The cold of his hand felt good against her body, and now that her mood had improved, she was feeling much better. She set the spoon and container aside before curling against him and sighing, "I'm sorry I've been such a bitch lately. I'm just…stressed, I think. I'm not allowed to talk to you about certain things…and I get worried. And the trainees are all idiots."

"It's alright, my little spider, I'm not exactly the most agreeable of person's all of the time myself," Loki teased as he pressed a soft kiss to her temple while he held her closer. "I'm hardly in a position to complain of such things. You needn't worry about anything." He brushed his lips against hers for a gentle kiss. "I love you very much, Natalia. I truly want to make you happy."

Days later, Loki had left the penthouse for the morning, and Natasha had just finished emptying out the contents of her stomach in the toilet. She sat down on the floor of the bathroom and hugged her knees to her chest. She shook her head as she rested her forehead against her knee, "It can't be…it can't be…"

For nearly three weeks, she'd ignored the obvious. The missed period, tender breasts, mood swings, nausea and exhaustion…she knew what it meant. And there was no way she was ever going to let Loki find out.

He'd definitively said that he didn't want children and knowing him, he'd likely accuse her of doing this on purpose. She didn't need that kind of stress or hurtful accusations.

No…she needed to rid herself of this issue. Fast.

Natasha knew she probably wasn't cut out for motherhood, and she refused to give it anymore thought than that. She'd had her shot and the fates let her know that she wasn't supposed to have a child by taking Rose away.

She spent some time, researching clinics and finding one that would be able to fit her in by the end of the week. She finally found one before jotting the number and appointment time down on a piece of paper on her night stand.

After her appointment had been scheduled, she felt the need to confirm what she felt she already knew, so she made her guard take her to the local drug store. Being the sneaky little spider she was, she was able to easily slip away from him to grab a pregnancy test without him noticing. She bought some eyeliner and ice packs before telling him she had to use the restroom.

Right there, in the drug store bathroom, she took the test. Of course, it was positive. She shoved the test into her jacket pocket and rejoined her security guard before they went back to the penthouse.

Loki smiled as she enter their chambers, though his face quickly fell when he noticed her expression. There was obviously something bothering her. He moved forward as she began to take off her jacket. "Let me help you, little spider," He entreated as he stepped behind her, gripping the shoulders of the jacket as he attempted to slide it from her arms.

It took her a few moments to snap out of her daze and force a smile to her face as she let him remove her jacket and hang it on the hook by the door. She kissed him softly, but quickly as she moved further into the apartment, "How was your day?"

She needed to just get through the next two days…and then she was home free. Her appointment was in less than 40 hours…

"Something's bothering you, little spider," Loki insisted as he followed her into the living room. "What is it? You weren't training this afternoon. So I know it isn't about your recruits."

Natasha shook her head and ran a hand through her hair, "I'm just tired…really tired. I'm going to lay down, ok? I'm fine. I'll be fine. Don't trouble yourself…really."

She disappeared into the bedroom without another word. She was too distracted and flustered to be better at lying right now. She had too many thoughts in her head.

Loki strutted after her. He was concerned about her but also slightly annoyed. "Don't trouble myself?" the young god exasperated as he sat down on the bed next to her. "You could never trouble me." He reached out and grabbed a loose curl as he began to play with it absently between his fingers. "You seem to be very stressed the last few days and I think I have a solution. I'm going to take you away for a few days. Anywhere you like. What is your favorite place, little spider? It will be like a romantic getaway."

Natasha nervously chewed on her bottom lip, "Um…maybe we should go next weekend? I'm going to be putting some trainees through some testing and I want to be here for it. But a getaway sounds great. I'd love that."

She knew she needed to get her shit together. She typically lied better than anyone, and right now, she sounded like a teenager who'd been caught out past curfew.

"I'm really tired…and I have a pretty nasty headache. I'm going to just shower me to bed, ok?" she said, getting up and shedding her clothes before heading into the bathroom.

Loki became even more determined to find out the source of her strange mood as he watched her walk away from him. He strutted behind putting his hand to the door before she could close it. "You're testing has just been moved to next weekend," the young god smirked with a cocky tilt of his head. "If you are so tired than it is even more proof that you need some time away from whatever is troubling you. What about Paris? Is that not a place for lovers? I could take you there this evening."

The nervousness Natasha was feeling was causing her stomach to churn. If he didn't stop prying, she was certain she was going to throw up…again.

She stepped into the shower and shook her head, "Loki, I'm just not feeling well tonight. A good night's rest…and some Tylenol…that's all I need."

Loki retreated from the room and laid down on the bed. He decided to let the conversation drop for the moment but in the morning he was going to take her on a little getaway whether she liked it or not. Something was bothering her. He hated the idea that it might be about Barton. She hadn't asked about him again since he told her it didn't concern her. But that didn't mean that she wasn't thinking of him. Besides, a few relaxing days away might help with his other endeavor. He kept waiting for her to tell him that she was pregnant but the day had yet to arrive. Perhaps whatever was stressing her was part of the reason they had yet to conceive. It certainly wasn't for lack of trying on his part.

The following morning he sat at the edge of the bed waiting for her to wake up with a bouquet of roses in his hands and a small suitcase resting on top of the mattress. She sat up slowly as she took in the sight of him.

"Good morning, little spider," Loki grinned, hoping that a good night's sleep had improved her mood. "Are you ready to be romanced?"

The first thing Natasha wanted to do when she woke up that morning was vomit. It took every ounce of strength and will power she had for her to sit up and force a sweet smile to her face, "Morning…what's this—-"

That's when she spotted the suitcase. This guy didn't take 'no' for an answer.

"Loki…I appreciate the thought, but I can't go anywhere right now. I have…obligations. And a lot on my mind right now." When he began protesting, Natasha knew that it was time to pull out the big guns. She needed to make him not want to go away with her.

She needed to start a fight.

"…I'll go if you let me go see my friends and tell me what you did with Barton."

It was exactly what Loki had been afraid of. He couldn't say that he was surprised when the words left her lips. But just because he wasn't shocked by her words didn't make the rage that began to consume him any less. Had he not been attentive? Had he not done everything he could to satisfy her every whim? Yet, still she obsessed over that man.

Loki stood up and tossed the flowers onto the bed as he ran his fingers through his long, ebony locks. "Barton is none of your concern and you know very well why your visiting privileges were revoked, little spider." He began to pace around the room as his feeling of jealousy increased by the second. "Is this what you meant by having a lot on your mind? It seems like there is only ever one thing going on in that pretty little head of yours. He is alive and well in his new home. That is all the information that I will ever give you."

Natasha glared and realized she wouldn't have to pretend for much of this fight. Her "privileges"…were "revoked". Like some sort of child…

"First of all, I explained it to you once and I can't believe I have to explain it again…he is my FRIEND. It's not natural or right for people to just turn off their concerns for their friends because you happen to keep me comfortable and sexually sated, Loki! And second…if I'm more than just a sex slave, you wouldn't be revoking my privileges to go visit my other friends. You ARE punishing me! Barton isn't here anymore! It shouldn't matter that I'm visiting them!"

Natasha felt her body temperature rising as she got more agitated and it dawned on her that it might be the fact that she was carrying a half frost giant fetus that was causing her body temperature to do weird things. She rushed to the kitchen and grabbed a handful of ice, feverishly rubbing it on her neck and chest as she stood in front of the freezer.

"We had deal and you broke it." Loki spat out as he followed her from the room. "There are consequences for one's actions or are you too much of a child to realize that? If you wanted to continue to see your pitiful little friends then you shouldn't of lied to me." He watched as she began rubbing her neck and chest with ice. She was perspiring and it wasn't hot at all. His anger began to fade as worry for her took its place. "What is the matter? It isn't hot in here, little spider?" He moved closer as concern filled his emerald eyes.

"I'm fine!" she snapped, but forced herself to calm as she grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. "I just get a little hot when I'm agitated. Which I am, right now! Apparently I'm not allowed to just make my own decisions or have free will anymore. It's everything Loki wants at all times. You're the only one I'm allowed to think about or care about! I'm not allowed friends. I know you gave me that job to keep me busy and distracted! It wasn't because you wanted me to do it, it's because you knew that if I didn't do it, then just waiting in this apartment acting the part you want me to act isn't enough for me!"

Natasha swayed a bit as a rush of heat flooded her body, setting her hand on the counter to steady herself.

"I'm fine", she said quickly, not even giving him the chance to further question her.

"You don't look fine," Loki insisted as he moved closer to her. "And I gave you that job because I wanted to make you happy. I have never forced you to do anything. I don't like you implying that I did." His irritation at her words was at war with his concern for her well-being. For a moment it looked as if she had lost her balance before she recovered quickly. Her dark blue eyes staring at him coldly. The sight of which seemed to reignite all of his insecurities. "Acting the part? Is that what you've been doing? You didn't have to be here. If being with me takes such an effort on your part then you should have never returned to my chambers."

Natasha lowered her head as she placed her palms on the counter in front of her, desperately trying to keep the dizziness from causing her to sway again. On top of that, her stomach was churning and the heat coursing through her body was making her feel even worse. God, she just wanted to pass out and be done with this.

"Loki, I'm here because I love you. When I said 'acting the part' , I only meant that you seem to want a domesticated queen who is perfectly content with not having a life outside of the one you so meticulously plan for me and that's not ME, Loki! You have control over everything I do!" she bit off.

She rubbed her forehead and took another gulp of water as she closed her eyes tight. Natasha was concerned now…she felt like she was going to pass out, and the last thing she needed was for Loki to get too suspicious or concerned.

"I just need a couple of days to myself, ok? I've never lived with anyone before. I'm used to being very independent and I feel like I'm being parented right now. I have a fucking curfew for fuck's sake. You don't understand how hard this adjustment can be. You only care about what you want from me…"

"If you think I care for you so little than how can you even begin to claim that you love me?" Loki frothed. "A couple of days to yourself? What in the name of Hel is that supposed to mean? I told you not to come to me unless you meant it. I let you in my heart and now what? You think to leave me?" The young god slammed his fist into the counter top causing a fracture along the surface as the marble nearly caved in. "You are not going anywhere."

Natasha jumped at the force of the sound of his fist cracking the counter top. The fear that that created made her nausea increase tenfold, and her already dizzy state caused her to stumble and grab a hold of the refrigerator. She was going to throw up…or pass out…or both.

She closed her eyes and panted softly as sweat beaded on her forehead, "Loki…please…"

"Please what?" Loki seethed as his body trembled in anger. The idea of her requesting to be apart from him for even a day made him writhe in jealousy and resentment. "How dare you even suggest leaving me? I was perfectly fine before you. I never asked to feel this way." His dark green eyes narrowing as he glared at her. "I'm trying very hard… nothing I do is enough for you… you keep throwing him back in my face." His rage bubbling up like a volcano on the verge of erupting at the mere thought of the archer.

"Please, stop! I told you I wasn't feeling well! Just stop!"

Loki's voice pounded in her brain as she slowly attempted to get to the bedroom, holding onto furniture to stay upright on her way. She stumbled violently before she managed to jog the rest of the way and slam the door behind her, crumpling to the ground as tears wet her cheeks. At least he didn't see her crying…

Natasha felt the bile rising in her throat and scrambled across the floor to the bathroom to vomit.

"Where in the name of Hel do you think you're going?" Loki fumed as he watched her practically run into their bedroom and slam the door. "Don't you dare walk away from me!" he snarled. The young god nearly broke the door off its hinges as he shoved it open. Only to find the room was empty and the bathroom door was closed. He turned the handle but it was locked. "Open it up! Open it up right now or I'll knock it down. Our conversation is far from over."

Natasha was still hovering over the toilet when he had burst into the bedroom. She had just finished vomiting when he tried the bathroom door, so she reached to unlock it with a shaking hand as she flushed the toilet and moved to splash water on her face and brush her teeth. Her body was trembling, but she was desperately attempting to keep the shaking under control as she turned the water on.

"I'm just not feeling well…" she said. Her voice was far softer and held far less conviction than it usually did. She leaned heavily against the sink as she wiped her face with the wash cloth.

Loki watched as she leaned over the sink and washed her face. He could see that her body was trembling and his anger immediately began to cool. "Do you have a fever?" he asked worriedly as he reached out to touch her cheek.

Natasha shut her eyes and let out a breath, "I think I have the flu. It's common…just miserable. I'll be fine. I just need rest…"

She held onto the wall as she moved past him to collapse on the bed.

"The flu? What is that exactly? I will get you a doctor," Loki prompted as he followed after her and sat down on the mattress at her side. He didn't like the idea of her being sick. "I'm… I'm sorry for our argument. You're not feeling well and … well… let's just forget about it. You just lie down and I will take care of you, little spider. I'm not going to leave your side."

"It's just a virus. People get it every day…I'm going to be fine. I've been sick worse than this before. Trust me. I'm fine. You can go work. I'll just stay in bed. Ok? I promise not to move."

Natasha knew that would be a promise she could easily keep. She felt like hell.

"A virus? I don't like the sound of that, little spider." Loki remarked as he scrutinized her closely. She was looking worse by the minute. "I had already planned on taking you away for a few days so instead I will just stay here with you. I needn't go in at all. If there is something that needs my attention they will bring it to me." He brushed a few curls away from her forehead with a tender motion. "I needn't leave your side if I don't want to. I am the ruler, after all."

Her body temperature slowly returned to normal as she lay there, getting lovingly stroked by the god who had cracked stone and nearly broken a door off of its hinges to get to her. Natasha wasn't easily rattled, but dealing with Loki when he was that angry…and knowing that it was directed toward her was stressful. Actually, it was frightening.

She closed her eyes and slowly drifted to sleep. She'd have to worry about how she'd get rid of Loki for a few hours tomorrow afternoon later. For now, her body was spent.

Loki settled himself next to her as he watched her sleep. She seemed much better. She wasn't sweating anymore and he wondered if that meant that this virus was over. He was still irritated about her remarks about the archer and her suggestion to have a few days away from him. But he was trying not to think about it. Perhaps, it was just her illness talking. Maybe she hadn't really meant it at all.

He glanced down to see her bright blue eyes gazing up at him. "What can I get for you, little spider?" He was feeling even more possessive of her than usual after their fight and at the moment he had no intention of ever leaving her side.

"Water…cold water, please. I'm going to take a bath…"

Natasha thanked him as he conjured her water and turned on her bath water. "Can you make sure it's not too hot?" she asked as she slowly got out of bed and moved to the bathroom, stripping before stepping in.

She closed her eyes as she sank down into the large soaking tub. She glanced up at the concerned look in his eyes as he stared at her, "I'm going to be fine. Really."

"I didn't think you would succumb to one of these Midgardian illnesses. I thought you had that super serum. I don't like seeing you not well, little spider," Loki lamented as he watched her from the doorway. "I think a doctor should look at you."

"No…no doctor", she murmured as she leaned her head back. "It's rare, but it happens. It just means that I'll get better faster. It's not a big deal. I'll probably be perfectly healthy come tomorrow."

Natasha finished her bath and got out of the tub before venturing out to the living room. She grabbed some crackers and sat down on the couch to nibble on them, glancing in his direction.

"You're watching me like I'm some sort of ticking time bomb."

"I just want you to be well," Loki offered as he moved towards the sofa and sat down, placing his arm around her. "To be well and happy and at my side, that's all I want." He brushed his lips against her forehead. She didn't feel hot anymore. Perhaps, the fever had truly subsided. He glanced down at the crackers she was eating. If not for the fever he might have had hopes that her stomach was bothering her for other reasons, he mused.

They following 24 hours were quiet, but as the time for her appointment approached, Natasha began getting nervous. She felt better, and her fever didn't return, so she began reassuring the ever-attentive Loki that she was fine.

"I love you, but you've been less than two feet away from me at all times for the past 24 hours. I won't cease to exist if you aren't right next to me…"

"Now you are beginning to sound like your old self, little spider," Loki jested as he looked over some papers that had been brought to him for his review. "That pleases me very much but I am as stubborn as you and I'm not going anywhere." He turned another page and sighed. It was remarks from Barton's new warden. He was the very last thing that he wanted to think about. "And I don't want you going anywhere either. I've already informed the guard that you are to stay put until further notice." There was the slightest edge to his voice as he spoke. Just seeing the man's name seemed to spike his ire.

It took a little bit of willpower for her to keep from rolling her eyes, "Not even for a walk to get some fresh air? Please?"

Natasha had her pout down to a science. Widened, glistening blue eyes, slightly poked out bottom lip and a slight shift to be sure that her cleavage was standing at attention. All very subtle…yet worked out to a perfection.

"Not without me," Loki advised as he glanced up to see her sexy pout. The young god grinned widely. "You really are feeling better, little spider." He stood up from his seat and walked over to her and enclosed her face in his hands. "You are all set to wrap me around your little finger." He brushed his lips against hers with a sly smile. "I will take you for a walk if you want but my orders to the guards still stands."

Natasha let out an exasperated sigh. She wondered if she could even manage to slip away from Loki. It would be hard…but not impossible.

"Fine…I'm going to put my shoes on", she grumbled as she headed toward the bathroom, but the sudden sound of a knock on the door caught her attention.

Loki moved to answer the door. He could hear the irritation in Natasha's voice but he wasn't going to change his mind. He could not shake the fear that she wanted to leave him ever since she made that remark about wanting time to herself. The door opened to reveal one of his Lieutenants in the entrance.

"What is it?" the young god exhaled irritably.

"That issue that I sent to you earlier," the solder advised. "It is getting worse."

"Fine," Loki snapped before turning back to the Black Widow. "I am sorry, little spider, we will have to postpone are walk for a little while. This won't take long I promise." His dark green eyes bore evilly into the guard that was standing outside the door. "Remember your orders," he seethed, dropping his voice down lower as he bent his head closer to the man. "She doesn't leave here for any reason. None at all. It would be unwise of you to forget that." Before closing the door behind him.


	8. Chapter 8

Natasha listened to his orders to the guard, knowing that it only meant that she would have to take the hard route rather than slip past him like she was originally planned. She put on her shoes, then walked to the door. When she opened it the guard stood, "Go back into the apartment, Miss Romanoff."

She stepped fully out into the hall, "I want to go out."

"You're under strict instructions to stay in the apartment", he stated, moving to take her arm. As soon as his hand connected to her body, she grabbed his wrist, twisted it and used his arm to help propel him, slamming his head into the wall. The large man was dazed, so Natasha used that as an opportunity to kick him in the face, successfully rendering him unconscious.

From there, she was able to slip into the elevator and exit the building, sight unseen.

Natasha stopped at a library and used one of the computers to hack into the public records database to "rearrange" some information so that she could print out a fake ID. From there, she went to the clinic.

She sat down in the waiting room and began filling out her fake information. Within a couple of hours…she'd be rid of this problem…

Loki walked through the hallway back towards his chambers. It had taken even less time than he thought which he hoped would please his little spider. He knew that she was annoyed with him for insisting she stay put but he would make it up to her by showing her a delightful afternoon. He froze as his eyes caught sight of the guard outside of his penthouse attempting to sit up, his face half-dazed as he shook his head in an attempt to awaken more fully. Loki seized him by the neck and held him against the wall.

"What the hell happened here?" the young god seethed.

"She attacked me, Your Majesty." the guard whimpered. "I was following your orders I swear." Loki tossed him across the hall in a fit of rage as he stormed into the apartment. Was she fleeing from him? After all this time? How could she do that? How could she claim to love him and then run? He gazed around the room dumbfounded. She hadn't even taken her jacket. He took it off the hook where it was hung and pressed it against his face, breathing in the scent of her. Where would she have gone? He began to walk toward their bedroom determined to find some clue of where she might have headed to when he heard a slight click along the floor. He looked down and saw a small white plastic stick. He picked the strange contraption up, it must have fallen out of her jacket. There was a tiny window at one end and it read 'pregnant'.

The young god stared at the word as he read it over and over. She was pregnant. That was why she was so sick. And she knew it but she didn't tell him. He flew into their bedroom as he began opening her dresser drawers and throwing things around. If she hid this thing in her pocket who knew what else she was hiding. Maybe some clue to what her plans were. Why would she leave him? He had never felt so desperate.

It was then that his eyes fell on a crumpled paper along side their bed. Loki picked it up. There was a name on it that he didn't recognize along with a time and a phone number. Loki dialed it as he heard a woman's voice answer.

"Durnham's Women's Clinic." A woman announced.

"Clinic… What is that.. is this a hospital? Doctor's office?" the young god probed irritably.

"We take care of a variety of women's healthcare needs." The woman advised. "How may I help you?"

"I'm looking for my wife," Loki lied. "She has long curly red hair and blue eyes, about 5'2', her name is Natasha. I think she has an appointment with you."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I can't give you that information," The woman insisted. "Patient confidentiality."

Loki slammed the phone down and then redialed it, using a glamour spell to change the sound of his voice.

"Durnham's Women's Clinic." the woman announced again.

"Hello, I have an appointment this afternoon, could you give me directions on how to get to your office." Loki inquired. He had a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach that he knew exactly why she had made an appointment to this place.

Natasha sat in the waiting room, her eyes glazed over as she stared down at the paperwork attached to the clipboard in her lap. This felt wrong. She didn't want a child. She didn't want to be a mother…did she?

Natasha was having second thoughts as she slowly twirled the pin in her fingers. Maybe she should have told Loki she was pregnant…maybe he would want to come with her. She was almost certain he'd be in support of this decision. He'd definitively told her that he didn't want children.

She shook her head and sighed, scratching her forehead before she continued filling out the paperwork. Natasha heard the door to the clinic open and glanced up.

Her breath caught in her throat as her eyes widened. Oh god…

"Loki…what are you doing here?" she gasped as she quickly stood.

"What am I doing here? What in the name of Hel are you doing here?" Loki snipped as he glance around the small waiting room. "I came back to find you gone and this… this fell out of your jacket pocket." He took the pregnancy test that had been clenched in his fist since he had found it and tossed it toward her. "You weren't even going to tell me? How long have you known? Were you even going to come back to me? Or was this just the first stop on your way to freedom?" He was overcome by so many emotions, anger, exasperation, fear, relief, sadness, he wasn't sure what to feel. He felt raw.

Natasha looked around the room before dropping the clipboard, grabbing his arm and pulling him out.

"I wasn't going to tell you because you told me that you didn't want children!" she snapped. The Black Widow felt a familiar surge of warmth through her body and closed her eyes as she let out a few slow breaths in an effort to calm herself.

"Everything I do, you always accuse me of having an ulterior motive, and I knew you'd think the same about this because we've been so careful. I don't know how it happened…but I didn't do this on purpose." She rubbed her head, "I was coming back. I promise you, I was. I was just trying to fix this…I didn't want to go through the hell of you accusing me of something else…"

"No, No. you're not going to turn this around on me." Loki intoned angrily. "What exactly was I going to accuse you of? I told you that if you came to me of your own accord that I would believe you. That I would trust that you had no ulterior motive. And you came to me. You chose to be with me. And I think I've lived up to our bargain. The Fates know that I've tried. I let you in my heart, Natalia." The young god paced around the sidewalk as he ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "You say you were going to come back. So you were going to come back and never tell me. After all this time, am I still no more than a monster to you? Just a horrible dictator that you placate with sex?"

"I never said that! And I'm not turning it around on you! I'm simply going off of words that came out of your own mouth! You TOLD me you didn't want children! You can't stand here and lie to me and say that you didn't! This was a mistake! I was just trying to fix it! I never said anything about you being a monster! Stop putting words in my mouth!" she practically screamed.

Sweat had begun to head on her brow, and the dizziness she felt was starting to overwhelm her. Natasha bent over and placed her hands on her knees as she gulped in a lungful of air. The last thing she needed was to vomit or pass out on the sidewalk…

"I wonder if that were Clint Barton's baby growing inside of you if you would be so quick to FIX it." Loki rasped. He saw Natasha bend over suddenly as she seemed to have trouble with her breath. He placed his hand on her arm to steady her. "Are you alright, little spider." His anger falling away as fear for her took over.

Natasha panted as she forced herself to straighten, "I'm fine."

She took a moment to collect herself and wipe the sweat from her forehead before glaring at him, "I would have probably had an abortion faster because he wouldn't have locked me in a fucking tower…and why are you even…YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T WANT CHILDREN!"

She practically screamed at him. What was his problem? He was acting like he wanted this. Natasha stumbled a half step as her vision grew cloudy. She had pushed herself too far. She felt the heat of her body reach its peak and all went black as she collapsed.

Loki caught her up in his arms immediately and called upon his magic to return them to the penthouse within seconds. Did women normally get so hot and pass out when they were pregnant? He had no clue. He laid her down gently on the bed as he ran his fingers along her forehead before running his thumb gently along her cheek. "Natalia… Natalia…" the young god whispered as she began to stir. "You passed out, little spider, but you're home now."

Natasha panted and shook her head. She squinted slightly as she took in a slow breath, "Hot…it's hot…I need ice…"

Loki had never been more worried as he took in the sight of her. She seemed almost delirious and she was sweating as if the room were a thousand degrees. He placed his hands on either side of her face as he let his Frost Giant nature take over. His hands began to turn blue as his entire temperature came close to freezing. If she needed cold to feel better than he would give her all the cold that he possessed, he decided as his entire body reverted to his Jotunn form.

It took several moments for her temperature to finally come down. She panted and relaxed against the bed after a few moments of silence. She'd never seen him in his Jotun form…she actually thought it was beautiful. But she knew they'd have to save that discussion for another day.

"…that's been happening every time I get really agitated…I think it has something to do with my body temperature trying to regulate itself because…of…you know…"

Loki dispelled his Jotunn form the moment that she started to speak. He was relieved that she seemed almost like her old self. "You should try and remain calm, little spider," the young god advised. "Which probably means that I should try and remain calm?" The corner of his mouth upturned in the slightest of smiles as he wrapped his fingers along her curl of her hair. "Let us start over. I know I said that I didn't want children but now that I know you're pregnant…" He began carefully trying to figure out the right words to say.

Natasha slowly shook her head as she sat up and removed her sweat-soaked shirt. She sighed, "No. Don't let a random accident change your mind. If you don't want kids, you don't want kids. We shouldn't do this…we're in no state to raise a child. We fight all of the time…and if this is what happens every time we fight, I doubt I'll make it through this pregnancy alive…and you know how my previous loss affected me…I can't go through that again. I won't. I'm going to contact another clinic and have this taken care of next week."

She carefully got out of bed and moved to the bathroom where she stripped down before turning on the shower water.

Loki continued to sit on the edge of the bed as he heard the water running in their bathroom. He obviously hadn't thought through his plan hard enough. He hadn't planned for the possibility that she would still be so set against it once she found out she was pregnant. How was he going to convince her to change her mind. He heard the water click off as she walked through the doorway wrapped up in her robe, her soft red curls falling about her in disarray.

"I don't want you to get rid of it," He blurted out simply. "I know what I said before but it's different now. I didn't think that you could ever really love me. We don't always fight, little spider. I think we are happy much more often than we are not."

Natasha slowly pulled the comb through her hair and pulled it back in a ponytail as she sighed and shook her head again. Natasha couldn't handle this.

Not right now.

"I'm really tired…and I'm still feeling nauseated. I don't want another fever episode, so let's just…talk about it tomorrow, ok?"

She knew that the only reason why he relented was because he knew her health was on the line if they fought. The next morning, she woke up and immediately moved to their personal gym, getting on the treadmill for a run since she was certain he wouldn't let her out of the apartment anytime soon.

As she ran, she wondered why the hell he'd changed his mind. Loki was a deity…a being who was far older than she could fathom. If he felt a certain way, she knew it would be damn near impossible for her to change his mind about it. In love or not.

Loki sat on the bed, leaning back against the headboard as she entered their bedroom in her nightgown ready for sleep. He had been careful not to broach the subject all day. The last thing he wanted to do was cause another episode like what happened to her at the clinic.

"Would you come sit by me, little spider?" the young god entreated.

Natasha crawled onto the bed and sat next to him. The day had dragged on and things were unnaturally quiet between them. She could feel the tension in the air, hanging over them like a heavy cloud.

It was about time they talked…

Loki put his arms around her and pulled her into his chest as he rested his chin on top of her head. Her soft red curls felt like velvet against his skin. "I love you, Natalia. The way I feel about you I've never felt this way before in all my years. You mean everything to me, little spider."

Natasha let out a breath as she allowed herself to relax against his chest. She leaned up and gently kissed his lips before resting against him once more, "I love you too, Loki…more than anything."

Loki smiled as he held her closer. That was a good start, he mused. He felt like he was walking along the edge of a precipice and the slightest misstep would send him crashing into oblivion. If she didn't agree to have the child he wasn't sure what he would do. "Finding out the truth about what I was it was very difficult. It almost drove me insane. Most of the time I try not to think about it but it's always in the back of my mind." He feathered another kiss along her temple. He never really shared these thoughts with anyone and it wasn't easy for him to do. "But when you look at me like you did just now I don't feel like a monster anymore."

Natasha looked up into his eyes and pressed a loci kiss to his lips, "You're not a monster…monsters aren't capable of love. You are…an amazingly passionate, intense being…and I fell in love with you."

She sat up further and wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling his mouth to hers for a sensuous kiss.

Loki closed his eyes pulling her even closer as they deepened the kiss, his hand moving languidly along her back and down to her thigh. Though it really hadn't been long at all, he felt like it had been near to an eternity since he had felt her lips so close to his.

When they parted for a moment, foreheads touching as they gazed into each other's eyes, he made a cautious plea in his favor. "Perhaps, you might fall in love with the idea of having my baby? I know it wasn't planned but it's here and it's ours. Is your mind totally closed to the idea, little spider?"

Natasha stared into his eyes for a moment before she looked away and slowly sat up, "Loki…this isn't a good idea…"

She felt his lips on her neck and moaned weakly. She could rarely refuse him anything when they made love. "I don't know", she whimpered.

Loki sighed in contentment as he heard the soft moan escape her lips. The sounds that she made when he touched her were like an aphrodisiac, fueling his hunger for her and making him near insane with desire. He moved his lips along her throat to the soft spot behind her ear as he teased her with his tongue. His hand caressing her thigh as it slipped beneath the fabric of her gown.

"It could be wonderful," Loki breathed against her ear. "I love you so much, little spider, and I would adore your baby."

Natasha arched and writhed beneath him as he kissed and caressed all of her favorite spots. She moaned and reached between them, pulling his pants down to free him from the restraints of his clothing, "Loki…I'm not sure…I…oh…don't stop….."

Her words were marred by a series of moans and breathy gasps as her body eagerly responded to his touch.

All thoughts of children fled his mind as she tugged down his pants and gasped deliciously beneath him. Within seconds he had made their clothing vanish as he eased himself in side of her. The moment that he filled her completely a hard groan fell from his lips. Suddenly nothing else mattered then making her body erupt in pleasure. "Valhalla," he moaned as she bucked beneath him. "You feel so good… little spider…"

Natasha took his face in her hands, pulling his lips to hers for a hungry kiss. When the kiss ended, she pressed her forehead to his as she whimpered his name.

"Loki…Loki….I love you…I need you…"

She locked her ankles together behind his ass, ensuring that he wouldn't pull out too far as her hips undulating in tune with his thrusts.

It didn't take long before they were shuddering together as they reached an intense peak. She lay beneath him, her body trembling from the aftershocks of her orgasm.

"Every time I hear you say you love me… it's… it's like I'm hearing it for the first time," Loki gasped between shallow breaths as he relaxed at her side. His hand rested along her belly as he gazed into her dark blue eyes. "I feel so amazed… and… and thrilled and so very.. Very grateful, little spider."

Natasha ran her hand through her hair before glancing down at his hand as he rubbed her stomach. She wasn't keen on the idea yet…and she was afraid that if Loki got too attached before she made her decision, he'd "insist" that she keep the baby regardless of her feelings on the matter. All he'd have to do is keep doing what he's been doing. Keep her locked away…

"I don't know if I can do this, Loki", she said, slowly reaching to move his hand from her belly.

Loki watched as she took his hand in hers and moved it to rest along her thigh. "But why not? There is a little piece of both of us inside of you right now. Does that idea not please you even the tiniest bit?" He leaned forward and kissed her stomach before moving languidly upward, teasing her breasts as he made his way to her throat and then finally her lips before he stared down at her with a mischievous grin. "Do you have no good thoughts at all about the idea, little spider?"

Natasha kissed him back before staring up into his eyes, "I don't know what kind of life we'd be able to give a child…and I…" She looked away and covered her eyes with her hand as she let out a slow breath, "I don't think I could survive another loss…I won't. I'm already dealing with these crazy hot flashes…I have a bad feeling…" She paused, "Why did you change your mind so suddenly?"

"I feel like I'm cursed," Loki admitted honestly. "And any child of mine would inherit my genes. What could I breed but a bunch of monsters?" He moved his hand back to her belly as he rubbed his thumb gently back and forth along her skin. "But this is part of you. And I don't feel that way when I'm with you, I feel the opposite. I feel blessed, Natalia." The young god nuzzled his face along her throat, enjoying the feel of the soft, red curls of her hair that cascaded around him. He didn't like talking about his heritage but he was desperate to change her mind. "I don't think our child would be a monster. I think it would be beautiful like its mother. I will love our baby as much as I love you, little spider."

Natasha bit her lip and let out a slow breath. Something was beginning to stir within her as he kissed her neck and rubbed her stomach. Up until that moment, it had not been a "baby" to her. It had been a problem…an inconvenience. Now, Loki was making her think of it as a person. A baby.

Their baby.

Too many thoughts began rushing through her head. When she woke up that morning, she was sure of her decision regarding the pregnancy. Now, she was confused.

"I need time…"

"Alright, little spider," Loki breathed against her throat as he continued the slow movement of his fingers along her stomach. "Just promise me that you won't run away again. That you'll tell me when you decide." Not that he was going to let her have even the remotest chance of repeating her performance of subduing her previous guard. He had already taken extra precautions so that she could not slip away so easily.

"I promise", she whispered. A soft sigh escaped her lips as she looked up into his eyes, "I thought I was doing what you'd want me to do…I never meant to alarm you, love. I promise I won't run away again."

A couple of days had passed, and Natasha was still undecided. One moment, she thought for sure that she didn't want to have a baby, then the next moment, Loki would do or say something insanely sweet, and her hormones would start fiddling with her head.

Natasha had just gotten out of the bath when she opened her towel and turned to the side to stare at her naked stomach. She was having a difficult time picturing having a baby.

"Don't you look delicious," Loki grinned as he leaned against the doorway. "I don't blame you for admiring yourself, little spider," he jested as his smile deepened. "Eh heh heh heh, I would stare at you all day long if I could."

Natasha laughed softly, covering her belly as she shook her head, "You flatter me. Do you have to leave today?"

She asked as she walked toward the bedroom to get dressed. Natasha dropped her towel and walked to the closet, "I want to go for a run tonight in the park. Can you come with me?"

"I will not be able to go with you this morning," Loki divulged as his dark green eyes roamed her naked form appreciatively. He took a few steps forward so that he was standing behind her as she tried to decide what to wear. He placed his hands along her hips as pressed his body against hers. "But feel free to go wherever you'd like, little spider."

Natasha moaned and let her head drop back against his shoulder. They hadn't planned on having sex that morning, but of course, they ended up rutting against each other like horny teenagers right there on the floor of the closet.

When they were done, she laid her head on his chest for several moments before she whispered, "I still don't know what to do…."

"You know what I want, little spider," Loki whispered, his breath fluttering against her hair as he enjoyed the sensation of having her in his arms. "If I could help you decide I would… Eh heh heh heh, in my favor, of course." He smiled broadly as he gazed down at her. His dimples in full force as his hand caressed her belly tenderly. "I really should get going. Enjoy your run and I will see you this evening." The young god hoped against hope that she was softening up to the idea. He was not a very patient man by any means. It was taking an awful lot of willpower for him to remain calm while he waited.

Natasha kissed him and watched him dress before heading out for the day. She was feeling a bit nauseous, so she decided to just go for a walk…with two guards, of course.

She slowly strolled down the street in deep thought, but she was so conflicted, no amount of walking or shopping could help her make her decision.

She loved Loki…but that didn't mean she knew it was a good idea to have his child. For as sweet as the young god could be, he could also be insanely jealous, possessive and his temper was the stuff of legend. Was she really certain she wanted to subject a child to that?

Aside from that, she was doubtful she was mother material. She was damaged enough to fall in love with someone as faulted as Loki…she was selfish, calculating, opportunistic…the list went on and on.

That night, Natasha cooked a meal of seared scallops over linguine. She was lighting candles on the dinner table just as he walked into the door, "Hey, love…did you have a good day?"

"Not really," He shrugged as he entered the room more fully. "That looks delicious." Loki wrapped her up in his arms and pulled her in for a kiss. "What about you? Did you enjoy your run?"

Natasha kissed him back and frowned, gently stroking his head as she stared into his eyes, "I'm sorry, love…"

She pressed another kiss to his lips before pulling his chair out for him, "I just went for a walk…and shopped. You have more shirts and pants now. You're welcome in advance. Come on. Sit down."

As they sat down to dinner, she sipped a glass of water as she stared longingly at the glass of wine she'd poured for him.

"Would you hate me if I decided not to have this baby?"

Calm, calm, he repeated to himself. She hasn't actually decided anything yet. Loki blinked up at her as he tried to force his body to relax. There was no way that he was going to let her get rid of this baby. "I could never hate you, little spider, but I would be… very disappointed. From the moment I saw that test in your pocket I've… It's not something I've ever wanted I know but with you it's different." He ran his long slender finger along the stem of his glass as he tried to think of the perfect thing to say. He was supposed to be known for his Silver tongue and it seemed at the moment that his words were his only weapon. "With you it's something I want very much."

Natasha could see the slight bristling of his demeanor. She knew him well…too well. He wanted this. Badly. She had been more recently leaning toward having the baby, but was still far from 100% sure. It seemed that Loki was sure enough for the both of them…

She slowly nodded, "Alright…I'll…I guess we'll…keep it."

Loki stood up so fast that he knocked the chair over as it clattered on the floor behind him. He moved swiftly to the Black Widow taking her hands in his as he lead her up from the table before pulling her into a hug and spinning her around. "You're going to have my baby," He grinned widely as he enclosed her face in his hands and leaned in for a romantic kiss. "A little baby for you and me." His tongue peeked along his teeth as he chuckled slightly and moved his hands to her stomach. "I'm going to make you both very happy, little spider."


	9. Chapter 9

Natasha wished that she shared in his joy and enthusiasm, but she was still worried about this. She still wasn't sure. She didn't feel comfortable getting too attached to the fact that she was "having a baby". She thought she was "having a baby" once before…and that baby wasn't breathing when she was born.

For now, she was only pregnant. That was all she could bring herself to accept.

Loki seemed extremely happy. He asked her if she preferred a boy or girl…talked about where they might put the nursery and even started asking about names.

Natasha just smiled and nodded, trying not to let the underlying fear and trepidation she had over the situation show through. She didn't want to ruin this moment for him.

Loki was ecstatic. Everything had worked out precisely as he had wanted it. Natasha was pregnant with his baby. He almost wanted to send an announcement to Barton just to see the look on his face at the news. Nothing would ever take her away from him now. He knew that she was still ambivalent about the child. She wasn't excited about it as he was but he couldn't blame her. He knew that she lost a baby and that she must be scared about losing another. She didn't want to get attached but soon she wouldn't be able to help it. He was sure of it. In the meantime, he just wanted to make her happy.

Natasha was sitting on the sofa, curled up with a blanket and watching a movie when he came home. He stood there for a moment simply staring at her. She was so beautiful. He hoped their child took after her. A little red head with bright blue eyes. When those sweet irises glanced in his direction, his grin widened as he moved to sit at her side.

"Tell me something that you want," Loki inquired. "Something that I can do for you that would put a mile wide grin on that luscious pout of yours, little spider."

Natasha looked at him and bit her lip. She smiled, at first thinking about asking for something silly…but her pregnancy was progressing, and she needed to get looked at.

"It's a pretty tall order, but you have to promise to not freak out cause of…my hot flashes, ok?"

After he promised to stay calm, she took a deep breath, "I want you to allow Bruce to be my doctor. There is no way I trust any stranger to touch me…and he's the smartest guy I know…maybe you can renovate their cells to have natural light? And…hot water?"

"I do not want you to have your doctor's appointments in a dungeon room," Loki declared pointedly. The mother of his child would not be giving birth in a prison. The thought of which struck a chord with him suddenly. The mother of his child would not be a prisoner. "I will have one of the rooms where my offices are befitted with everything that he would need. If he is willing than I will have him brought to you on days that you wish to see him and when the baby is born, of course."

It wasn't really that big of a danger. He wore a collar that stopped him from becoming that green monstrosity and he would keep him well guarded to and from her appointments. It would be simple enough. No real danger for him to escape.

But what about Natasha. That was another matter altogether. It was difficult for him to trust. Even now, knowing that she loved him and was having his child. It was not an easy thing for him to do. He was a realist at heart and he knew how quickly things could change. Still there were ways to give her freedom while still keeping a close eye on her. There were plenty of well-trained spy's at his disposal to keep tabs on her if he needed. And he did love her very much. Her happiness was important to him.

"I'm not quite sure that I'm getting a big enough smile," Loki teased as she gazed up at him curiously. "What if I were to tell you that the guards are going to be dispersed from our door. And that you may come and go as you please not only outside but inside the palace walls as well. Would that please you, little spider?"

Natasha's eyes lit up as she clambered on top of him, peppering his cheek, forehead and mouth with kisses. When he chuckled, she leaned back to stare into his eyes, "It's not even that I can go for a run or go shopping if I want to…it's that you finally trust that I love you enough to come back. You finally believe me."

She got a little quiet as a tear streaked down her face, "I just want you to trust me…trust what we have."

"I'm not very good at trust… I have cared for very few and well.. That life turned out to be a lie," Loki whispered softly as he brushed her tear away with his thumb. "I do believe you love me, Natalia, and I don't want to be your captor. I don't want you to feel like a prisoner, little spider. I want this to be your home solely because you wish it to be."

Natasha kissed him lovingly before she leaned back to meet his eyes, "It is. I could have taken out that stupid guard a thousand times…but I choose to stay. I choose us. What we have isn't perfect, but it's the most important thing in the world to me…and I cherish it. I cherish you, very dearly."

She slipped out of the shirt she wore as she began trailing kisses down his neck, whispering his name against his neck.

Loki could feel the tremor along his neck as her lips moved against his skin. No woman ever had such an effect on him. He was enraptured by her and now she was truly his. He slipped his fingers along the strap of her bra as he tugged it off her shoulder, moving his lips sensually along her bare flesh. His other hand moving to cup her breast over the lacy green fabric. "I love it when you wear green," Loki mused between kisses. "My little spider, I'm determined to make you very happy."

"Oh…god…then keep doing that", she murmured through a soft, breathless chuckle.

Once they were rid of their clothes, Loki transferred them to the bed where he kissed his way down her body until his mouth can into contact with the soft bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs. It wasn't long before her entire body was trembling, and a string of Russian words were flowing from her mouth.

As he climbed back up her body, she smiled at him, "Silver tongue…"

"Eh heh heh heh, so I've been told," Loki jested as he nipped playfully along her jawline. "There is no sweeter sight in this world than watching you come undone, my little spider." He shifted his hips slightly as he teased her entrance. He gazed at her adoringly as she arched beneath him. The sweet sounds of her moans rumbling from her throat. "My Natalia… always." He breathed huskily as he embedded himself deep within her. "You belong to me."

Natasha had wanted to fix him breakfast that morning. She wanted to bring it to him in bed, and she wanted them to make love until he had to leave to attend to his business for the day.

Too bad that she'd spent the last fifteen minutes kneeling over the toilet, vomiting. The bacon had burned, the freshly squeezed orange juice was room temperature and the toast was cold.

"Are you feeling better?" Loki asked as he watched her emerge gingerly from their bedroom while he turned off the burner of the stove. The smell of burnt meat permeating through the air. He glanced at the blackened bacon that was the cause of the stench. There was a tray on the counter adorned with toast and juice.

"Was this for me? Thank you, little spider." Her dark blue eyes glanced at the bacon as her frown deepened. He reached down and grabbed one, taking a bite of the nasty, hardened crisp. "Nice and dark just how I like them," he lied as he attempted to wash it down with the juice which was unfortunately as warm as the toast should have been.

Natasha rested a hand on her churning stomach as she sat down on a stool in front of the kitchen island. She leaned forward and put her face in her hands, "You don't have to do that, love…but I appreciate it. Could you do something about the…smell in here?"

She shut her eyes tight, "When is this stage over? I think I should see Bruce soon. I haven't been able to keep more than water or crackers down for weeks now. Is the medical room ready yet?"

With a wave of his hand Loki cleaned the kitchen, dispersing the food and the smell along with it. "Yes, everything is finished. You may have him brought to you there whenever you desire it." He moved around the counter so that he stood at her side and ran his fingers lovingly through her thick curls. The truth was he was quite anxious for some word on her health. The way her mood seemed to be tied to her temperature worried him. He wanted to know that they were both alright. He would not allow anything to happen to either of them.

Natasha rested against him, pulling him close as she wrapped her arms around him, "Today. I need to see him today. This is hard…"

Granted, she knew pregnancy was no cakewalk, but the fact that she was carrying a child much stronger than a normal human fetus was starting to show through. The fact that she wasn't getting the nourishment she needed was only adding to her weakness.

A few hours later, Bruce was brought into the medical room. Loki was going to be joining them as soon as he got finished with some important business.

She smiled and gave him a brief hug before asking how he was and asking how everyone else was. After the pleasantries were over, they got down to business. Bruce picked up the laptop he was provided and started typing notes in as he adjusted his glasses on his face, "So, you say you think you're how many weeks along?"

"Ten…I think."

"Lost any weight?" he asked without looking up.

"Six pounds down…"

Bruce glanced up, but continued typing, "So you feel sick around the clock, right?"

Natasha nodded, "Mostly. I have a few hours of reprieve every now and then."

He nodded, "Sadly, this sounds like a case of hyperemesis gravidarum. But it's treatable. I can give you an anti-nausea to try to curb your vomiting long enough for you to stop losing weight." She nodded in agreement as he continued typing, "So…anything else?"

"Yeah. I seem to overheat whenever I get agitated…like, a serious fever", she said, running a hand through her red curls. Bruce furrowed his eyebrows before searching the room for a thermometer. He placed it under her tongue and waited a few moments before checking it and raising his eyebrows, "Hm…96. That's…a little on the cool side. Average body temperature typically hovers around 98.6 degrees. Loki is a frost giant…"

Bruce was now in his element. He was given a scientific puzzle to solve and seemed more than happy to help…if only because he was no longer bored to death, locked in the dungeon. When Loki entered, he looked up, stiffening slightly, "Well…so far, I can tell you that the fetus has corrupted Natasha's ability to regulate her own body temperature. Right now, her body temperature is hovering a couple of degrees below the average human temp, but I'm going to need more time to figure out why the fevers are happening. I am going to need Tony's help. His father had direct knowledge of the original serum, and he could assist me in figuring out the possible adverse effects it could have on you during your pregnancy."

"Corrupted," Loki snipped irritably as he moved further into the room until he was looming over the doctor. "What an interesting choice of words. Purposefully chosen I'm sure… not affected or altered but a word that means to pervert, to debase as if my child is a taint to her." The young god could feel the rage and resentment flooding through his veins. These people would do anything to turn her against him. "I would be careful the way you speak to me in the future, Banner." He turned toward one of the guards who were waiting for the order to return the doctor to his cell. "Go retrieve the man of Iron from his cell. I want him fitted with restraints on his wrists before he is removed. In case he has any ideas of escaping."

"I was meaning it in a medical term. The same way a human fetus corrupts its mother's immune system so that it won't go about attacking the baby as a foreign entity. That's why pregnant women are more easily affected by illnesses. Their immune systems are compromised and corrupted by the pregnancy. I didn't mean it in any other way."

Natasha cleared her throat, "Everyone should remember that I practically burst into a ball of flames when I'm agitated, so let's all take it easy, ok?"

Tony was brought in, and he looked awful. It had been months since he had seen Pepper and Natasha was slowly, but surely, working up the nerve to ask Loki if they could arrange for a visit.

The former billionaire glared at Loki, then glanced at Natasha, "Hate him, indifferent toward her. Not sure why I should help."

"If you help, we'll let Pepper come visit you", Natasha suddenly blurted before glancing at Loki and favoring him with a hopeful smile.

"Or if you don't help I could take the lovely Ms. Potts from her current residence and introduce her to her own exquisite accommodations in my palace not nearly as comfortable as yours, I'm afraid." Loki drawled sarcastically as he glared back at the former playboy. "Which option I will choose depends solely on just how cooperative and invaluable I deem you to be so I would get busy helping your friend if I were you." Natasha should not have sprung something like that on him. He was not about to let either of these men think that they had any advantage over him. They were his prisoners and they would do what he said.

Bruce cocked his head to the side as he observed Natasha rub her forehead and groan at Loki's threat. Tony narrowed his eyes, "Fine."

Meanwhile, Banner picked up the thermometer and took her temperature again. When the results shown on the stick, he raised his eyebrows, "Wow. Nat…you're at 100 degrees already."

She furrowed her eyebrows and glanced at the thermometer, "What?"

"You're hypersensitive to stress right now…"

Tony sighed, "Well, the serum makes her a super soldier. It increases her strength, agility, and reaction time…which means it increases her adrenaline levels. You and Steve's fight or flight sense is off the charts. That's why your reflexes are so crazy, see?"

He suddenly shoved a beaker off the counter and Natasha's lightning-fast reflexes allowed her to catch it just before it hit the floor.

"So…what does this have to do with my fevers?"

Tony shrugged, "Think of all of the things your body does when it's stressed or afraid. The pupils dilate, the heart rate speeds up, sweat beads on the skin and…"

"…body temperature rises", finished Bruce. "The fact that the baby's taken away your ability to stop your body from hitting its boiling point combined with the fact that the serum automatically forces your body to overreact to stressors…it means that with this pregnancy…stress could literally kill you."

"What can you do for her?" Loki probed, all ire gone from his voice as the words the doctor had just spoken reverberated over and over again in his head. And the image of her passed out and delirious with fever flooded through his mind. There was nothing he feared more in all the nine realms than something happening to her. "Cold helps her," he added as he remembered how his icy touch had helped bring her body back to normal. "I have been able to bring her temperature back to normal when she has suffered these bouts." He moved closer to Natasha as he twisted a strawberry ringlet through his fingers before he whispered softly against her ear so that only she could hear. "Don't be angry with me, little spider, I did not mean it. I just don't wish for him to know. A ruler must always show his power but I will do as you ask."

This was out of hand…and it was far more than Natasha had bargained for when she'd agreed to keep the baby. She wasn't too keen on the idea of risking her life for this pregnancy.

Natasha nodded absently to Loki as Bruce spoke, hesitation evident in his voice. "Well…keep her calm. Low stress is a start. Make sure she relaxes as much as possible. Anything that upsets her too greatly could cause a spike in her body temperature, and that could cause a seizure. I know Frost Giants are very sensitive to heat, so, even if she doesn't suffer a seizure, if she gets too hot, it could threaten the pregnancy and she could lose the baby."

She rested her elbows on her knees and put her face in her hands before letting out a groan. Too much. This is too much.

"Until we work out a solution, maybe you could study relaxation techniques…yoga, exercise really helps stress levels…" he paused and turned around, searching the drawers before he came up with a handheld instrument he referred to as a Doppler. "If you can go ahead and lay back, we can listen to the baby's heartbeat."

Natasha laid back and lifted up her shirt before pushing her pants down lower on her hips. Bruce approached and placed the wand on her stomach as he fiddled with the volume controls on the device before the room came alive with the sound of a fast, fluid heartbeat.

"There we go…"

Loki could hear the thump thump clearly through the swishing noises coming from the small instrument that Banner held in his hand. He stared at her stomach in awe as he let the sound thunder through his ears. That was their child's heartbeat. He placed his fingers along her stomach. It suddenly felt so much more real to him. There was a tiny little being in there whose heart was beating just like his. A child they made together. "What a beautiful sound," he whispered. "I can hardly believe it, little spider, can you?"

A smile quirked at Natasha's lips as she heard the heartbeat. It was definitely amazing and far more real now. Bruce cleared his throat, clearly a little unnerved by the blatant show of affection from the god. He removed the Doppler and set it aside, "Natasha, you need to take a prenatal vitamin. Any over the counter one will do. Some of them might make you nauseated, so you might want to try a few different brands. If none of them really work, you can try to take two kid's vitamins a day. The anti-nausea medicine is called Zofran…I'm sure you can forge a prescription for it."

He wrote down the dosage instructions and handed it to her.

A couple of hours later, Natasha was sitting on the couch, staring out the window. She was frightened, and she was just dealing with the realization that she was completely responsible for the life of a helpless being…and the stakes were high.

Loki entered the room and moved swiftly towards the kitchen as he placed the bag that he held in his hands on the counter. It contained the medicine that Dr. Banner had suggested, along with every brand of prenatal vitamin that the store had stocked and several children's vitamin's as well. He wasn't taking any chances. He opened the bottle of Zofran, taking out a pill and conjured a glass of water as he moved toward the couch where Natasha was sitting. He handed it to her as he sat down at her side. The appointment had left him feeling both exhilarated and scared to death at the same time.

"Are you alright, little spider." Loki whispered soothingly. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

Natasha took the pill and swallowed before smiling at him and pulling him close to her, kissing him softly. She curled into his side, seeking refuge in the comfort of his arms as she nuzzled his neck.

"I'm scared", she said simply. It was almost as matter-of-factly as stating that the sky was blue or that the earth was round.

With the help of the medicine Bruce prescribed, she stopped throwing up every day, and stopped losing weight. She continued to go on her runs, which helped relax her, and she took up yoga.

Five weeks later, Natasha was getting out of the shower when she noticed a slight swell in her lower abdomen. She turned to the side and attempted to suck in, but no amount of sucking in hid the small bump.

She slipped into her nightgown and crawled onto bed, where Loki sat reading. She began trailing kisses up his neck as she pulled the book out of his hands.

"Eh heh heh heh," Loki laughed, his tongue peeking out playfully against his teeth as he pulled her more fully on top of him. "I was reading that." His hands caressing her backside before moving up under the hem of her gown. "By the nines, little spider, the things you do to me," he whispered against her lips as he claimed her mouth with his own. His hands roaming her body greedily as he pulled the gown up and over her head. He gazed up at her lustfully as she straddled him, when his eyes caught sight of belly. He placed his hand against the small bump along her abdomen as his grin deepened.

"You are starting to show, little spider," the young god beamed. "That is our baby. By the nines, I fall more in love with the two of you every second."

Natasha bit her lip nervously and covered her stomach, "I feel huge." She sighed and leaned down to kiss him, "I'm nervous about becoming slow and fat…but I guess as long as you still aren't repulsed by the sight of my naked body, I have nothing to worry about."

"Repulsed, eh heh heh heh," Loki jested as he flipped their bodies so that she was beneath him. "Dear sweet Natalia, there is absolutely no way of that ever happening." He moved his lips along her stomach, slow sensuous kisses as he moved his way back up to her mouth. "You are a goddess and you are only growing more beautiful to me. I have never wanted a woman more, my little spider."

Natasha giggled against his lips as he kissed her and slowly ran her hands through his hair as she wrapped her leg around his hips, "I love you so much."

She reached down and pulled his pants down as she felt him slowly begin to intimately caress her. When she was primed and ready, he slipped himself inside of her, making her gasp against his lips in pleasure.

"Oh…god…I love feeling you inside of me", she murmured.

A couple of days later, Bruce was brought back up to the medical lab to perform Natasha's ultrasound. Loki had brought in a state-of-the-art machine that could do 4d imaging.

Bruce took her temperature, then instructed her to lay down on a table beside the machine. She lifted up her shirt and pressed the wand to the small swell in her abdomen. Soon, they were able to see the picture of their baby. Thanks to the 4D imaging, they could clearly see that the tiny fetus' hands were covering its face.

"Eh heh heh heh, our baby is shy, little spider," Loki chuckled at her side as he stared at the screen. He saw the strange look that Banner gave him out of the corner of his eye but he ignored it. Nothing was going to spoil this moment. "Look at those little fingers and those tiny little feet, Eh heh heh heh. It is such a miracle, truly." His heart was near to bursting with emotion at seeing such a defined picture of their child. He could feel a slight tear threatening at the corner of his eyes as he tried to steel himself. It would not due for him to cry in front of the Avengers. He enclosed his hand around the Black Widows as he continued to gaze at the monitor.

Natasha stared at the screen, smiling a little as Bruce moved the wand around on her belly, trying to get a better angle. The little one moved to suck its thumb, and Natasha smiled even harder.

"Wow", she gasped, covering her mouth.

Bruce nodded, "Looks healthy, heart rate is good. I think I can see the sex…if you want to know."

Loki glanced at Natasha with his eyebrow quirked as he waited for her lead. If she didn't want to know than he was perfectly capable of waiting all though he was brimming over with curiousness. The Black Widow smiled up at him and nodded.

"Yes," the young god told Banner. "We do."

"You're having a boy," Bruce confirmed before removing the wand from her belly and moving back towards the counter.

"A son?" Loki remarked as his dark green eyes became even more transfixed on the screen. A boy, an heir. their little prince, he mused. Natasha was carrying his son. He suddenly felt a great weight of responsibility fall upon his shoulders. He was going to be a father and that entailed more than just holding the tiny bundle when it was born. He was going to have to teach his son so many things. There was supposed to be a special bond between father and son. The thought of which made him think of Odin which he didn't like and even worse of Laufey.

Bruce printed out a picture of their baby, which Natasha held onto for hours after the appointment. Their baby had a face…and HE was a HE. Sucking his thumb. She smiled and shook her head before using a piece of tape to secure the picture to the refrigerator.

Could it be that she was actually excited about this?

She stood there with her arms crossed, staring at the picture with a little smile on her face.

"A boy", she whispered as she gently cupped the swell of her belly.

"We will have to think of a name," Loki quipped as he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. His hands enclosed over top of her own. It was almost like they were hugging their child, he mused to himself as he settled his chin in the crook of her neck. "Unless you want to just call him 'boy', eh heh heh heh, Boy Lokison. What do you think, little spider?"

Natasha laughed and lowered her head to look down at their hands as they covered her belly, "No…Boy won't do…we'll figure something out. We have plenty of time until he gets here."

In reality, she was still fearful of losing him. She was growing attached…something she had kind of been trying to avoid, but seeing that image forced her to face an unmistakable truth.

She was having a baby.


	10. Chapter 10

A few weeks later, Natasha and Loki were playing Scrabble. She didn't trust him to conjure his own dictionary, since she was certain that he would rig it to contain words he played, so she went in search of the one she'd randomly seen in the house while he laid the game out.

Natasha went searching through his desk drawers, and came across a calendar. It caught her eye because she saw red pen mark over it, along with green. Her curiosity was piqued. She picked up the calendar and began flipping through the months. The marks were made from six and seven months ago, but stopped about 4 months ago…right after Loki found out that she was pregnant.

The red pen marker covered weeks in which she was menstruating, while the green…appeared to indicate ovulation days.

Why would he have something like this? Why would he keep track of this?

No…no. He didn't do this on purpose…did he?

She began remembering how eager he was to prevent her from having an abortion and how in love with the idea of having a baby he was…and suddenly it made sense.

A surge of warmth took over her body as she marched into the living room and flung the calendar at him, "Tell me this isn't what I think it is, Loki!"

"It looks like a calendar," Loki remarked dryly as he secretly berated himself for not throwing it away months ago. He had completely forgotten that he even had it. "Please try and be calm, little spider," the young god entreated as he stood from the floor. "I'm not sure what your imagining but you must think of yourself and the baby." He took a slight breath before he continued. "I told you that I didn't want children. I was simply trying to take extra precautions to ensure that we didn't." he lied. He placed his hand on her forehead as he could see a bead of sweat beginning to form. "I think you should sit." He began to bring on the icy feel of his fingertips as the skin of his hand turned blue. The words of Banner echoing in his mind. "It means with this pregnancy stress could literally kill you."

Natasha swatted his hand and pushed him away, "You're LYING! I know you, Loki! I know you! Tell me the fucking truth! Now!"

"I was trying to track your fertile time to stay clear of it and that is the truth," Loki insisted. He was not bestowed with the names of 'God of Mischief and Lies' and 'Silver-tongued Prince' without sufficiently earning the titles. Telling her the truth would only make her even angrier. His fear for her health getting worse by the second as he watched the beads of sweat falling from her reddened face.

"Do you not remember that right before you returned to me that you had thought you might be pregnant? We were finally truly together and I didn't want to risk anything messing it up." The young god took hold of her face in his hands as his dark green eyes bore into her own. The cold from his fingers seeping into her skin as he gazed down at her. "Please, little spider, let me help you and try to calm down. If anything happened to you I couldn't bear it."

Natasha wanted to believe the sincerity in his voice, but something felt off…something felt wrong. She let out a breath as she stared at him, "If you were trying so hard not to get me pregnant, why did you insist on us having unprotected sex those few times? You didn't even try to pull out!"

She closed her eyes and shook her head, "You're lying to me…I can feel it…just tell me the truth! I knew something was wrong! What else did you do? Huh? How did you do it? We were so careful after those first few times. How did condoms YOU conjured get me preg—-" Natasha's voice suddenly cut off as she blinked rapidly, realization dawning on her features. He must have sabotaged the condoms he conjured.

"…you son of a bitch…" she glared as she backed away from him.

The young god exhaled slowly as she pulled her face away from his hands. It was obvious that there was no way he was going to get her to believe that he hadn't done it on purpose. "Alright, little spider, here is the way it is going to be," Loki commanded as he watched her move away from him. If looks could kill he would have been dead twice over and he could see that her blood pressure was skyrocketing. All he could think of was Banner's warning that stress could kill her. "You have two choices. You are either going to sit down and let me cool your temperature before you bring on a seizure or I am going to immobilize you with magic so I can cool you down before you have seizure. Which do you choose?"

"Don't you fucking dare. You LIED to me! You tricked me! You manipulated me! For what?! You…you just wanted another way to control me, didn't you? You wanted something that would keep me tethered to you because you're still terrified that I'm going to go running back to Barton! My word wasn't good enough! My LOVE isn't good enough. You need to resort to scheming and trickery. You have to do this!" she screamed, motioning toward her swollen stomach.

Natasha suddenly doubled over in pain, grabbing a hold of her belly and crying out. When he moved near her, she attempted to push away, "Don't touch me!"

"Then magically it is," Loki snipped as he cast a spell over her so that she couldn't move. He placed his hand on her stomach and another on her forehead as he let his Jotunn form take over completely. Her skin was so hot but he could feel the change begin from almost the first contact of his frosty touch. She cursed at him in Russian to get his hands off of her but the coldness from his palm seemed to sooth her pain as well as lower her blood pressure because suddenly she stopped yelling at him and simply glared at him instead.

The moment that her temperature had gone back to normal, Loki picked her up and carried her to the medical room. He ordered the first soldier that he past to bring Banner to them immediately. Loki laid her down on the examining table but kept his hand on her stomach as his dark crimson eyes observed her.

"I wanted a part of you that no one else had," Loki entreated. "But you're wrong it's not your love or your word that wasn't good enough for me. It's me, little spider. It's so hard for me to think that I'm good enough… that I'm anything more than this thing that's standing in front of you right now. My head is filled with all this noise… pain, insecurities.. I try to lock them away and then something just sets me off and I… I get angry and jealous and I do stupid things. It's all me, it's not you. I know you love me. I just don't know why."

Natasha stayed still, staring straight ahead and refusing to meet his eyes as tears silently streamed down her face. She didn't know what to think or feel other than betrayal and intense hurt.

She shook her head and blinked some of the tears away, "You knew I didn't want this. You knew how much that loss scarred me. You knew how terrified I am of ever feeling that pain again…but none of that mattered to you. It was all about you. Your insecurities. Your wants. Your needs…where does what I want fit into all of this? Where does what I want or need fit into any of your plans?"

Natasha covered her face and sniffled, "…you tell me you want me to be happy, it's only happiness on your terms. All on the condition that my happiness falls in line with your plans. I mean, do you really even love me?" A slight pain seized her stomach as she put a hand there, "…see? This is why having a baby is a mistake. This is what I was afraid of…you hurting me. You lying to me…"

Bruce arrived, putting on his glasses, "Are you in pain?"

He quickly attached a fetal monitor to her stomach as he took her temperature, "Alright, 100…and lowering, but…" Banner glanced at the monitor, "…you're having some weak contractions."

Natasha shook her head in the negative.

"She was in a lot of pain earlier and she had a sharp stab a minute ago." Loki added. "But I think the cold of my skin helps stop it somehow."

"Interesting…" Banner pondered before turning his attention back to the Black Widow. "I'm going to give you an IV with magnesium sulfate it should help stop the contractions." The doctor moved about the room and got the supplies that he needed. Loki watched as he inserted the needle into her arm and prepared the IV while Natasha just stared up at the ceiling. "It's a waiting game at the moment. If this medicine works than we should start to see results in about five or ten minutes." He moved back toward the counter and began writing vigorously in a notebook.

"I do love you, Natalia," Loki whispered at her side. "You know what I am. You knew it the first time I visited your cell. Selfish, manipulative, ill-tempered, calculating. I know you know me as I know you. We share many of the same traits, do we not? It is why we are such a perfect fit. I don't want to hurt you. I only ever wanted to make you happy. You know that I love you. I know that you do."

Natasha said nothing. She simply lay there, staring at the ceiling numbly. The contractions eventually did stop, and, after a pelvic examination, Bruce told them that there had been no change in her cervix. She was placed on bed rest for the next few weeks, and sent back to the penthouse.

There, she lay in bed staring out the window. She got out of bed to bathe, but ate very little and remained completely silent for nearly three days straight. She knew they shared some of the same traits, but this was a deliberate violation of her trust…and her body.

Natasha was having a hard time getting over that. She began to question whether Loki honestly knew what love was. She was so hurt. So betrayed…and still so frightened. Just when she was warming up to the idea of motherhood, this has sapped all of the cautious enthusiasm she'd gained. Now, she was struggling with a feeling of resentment toward the innocent life inside of her. She knew it didn't make sense…but her anger at Loki and his actions upset her. He'd done this on purpose…knowing her history and her thoughts on the matter.

Loki had left her alone for three days, assigning a live in nurse to stay in their guest room and tend to whatever she needed since Banner had placed her on bed rest. He assumed the sight of him would only make her angry but he missed her terribly. He felt an ache in chest, like a piece of him was missing he hated it. He knew from the nurse that she had not been eating well or talking very much. After the third day he decided to make an attempt to see her.

The young god walked into their bedroom cautiously. She was lying under the covers reading one of his favorite books. She made no acknowledgement of his presence though he knew that she had seen him walk in. Her dark blue eyes had gazed at him for a moment before darting back to the volume in her lap. He moved closer to her and laid a small packet of twizzlers on top of the page she was reading.

"Is there any forgiveness in your heart for me?" Loki entreated. "Little spider, please give me a chance to make it up to you."

Natasha stared down at the candy in her lap for several moments before tears slowly began forming in her eyes. She looked up at him as one of them streaked down her face, "I don't know how you can…I thought you'd turned my world upside down when you stripped me down and put me in that cell…"

She lowered her head again and sniffled before wiping at her eyes, "Do you know how much this affects me? I didn't want to be a mother. You forced this on me…"

Natasha wiped her eyes again as she sucked in a shaky breath, "I love you…but you…you hurt me. And I don't know how you could make this up to me. I had JUST begun to warm up to the idea…now…" Natasha paused and looked down, "now, I find myself wishing I could rewind back to that day at the clinic…wishing that you'd had made it there a couple of hours later than you did."

"I'm sorry, little spider, I am truly sorry that I hurt you," Loki pleaded. He moved his hand toward her hair out of habit but stopped himself as he brought his arm back to his side. "In my mind I never thought that my actions would cause you pain. I see I was wrong. I know how affected you were by the loss of your daughter but I also saw you playing peek a boo with that little baby. And I don't know… I thought that when you held your own healthy child in your arms that you would be happy."

He brushed his hand through his long, black hair nervously. He had no control over the situation and he didn't like it. His heart was in her hands and he had a horrible feeling that she would never forgive him. And then what would he do?

"When we first started I know you had ulterior motives when you told me you wanted to be with me but we started again. You came to me for me and I believed you." Loki took a tentative seat along the edge of the mattress as his dark green eyes gazed at her hopefully. "Please, little spider, can we start again? Isn't there some way that I can prove to you that you can believe me?"

Natasha looked down at her hands before meeting his gaze, "Yes…you can…you can set the Avengers free."

She pursed her lips together as she watched his face begin to lower in protest. Natasha put her hand on top of his, "I know how powerful you are. There has to be a way that you can make them forget that you are the enemy. They won't be a threat then. These are good people who were doing what they thought was right for their world. They don't deserve to be locked away."

Loki stared at her hand as it rested on top of his. The way she glared at him a few days ago he had thought she might never want to touch him again except perhaps to hit him. If she hadn't have been in so much physical pain he was certain she would have. He shouldn't be surprised by her request. He supposed that he wasn't but her suggestion to use magic on them caught him off guard.

"You would want me to cast a spell on them?" Loki puzzled. His emerald eyes still firmly placed on their joined hands. "It would be agreeable to you if I altered their memories concerning me?"

Natasha nodded, "They deserve to be free. Just make sure they at least remember who they are. You can even make Clint forget me. Just make sure Pepper and Tony are together and that they're free…"

"I could cast such a spell with the orb in my scepter," Loki advised as he lifted his emerald gaze to meet hers. "I could have them all free in a few hours' time." He wasn't exactly fond of the idea but with an enchantment in place they would not be a threat to him. Or at least they shouldn't be. It seemed a small price to pay if she would forgive him. "Alright, little spider, I will do it."

Natasha's eyes were wide with hope as she squeezed his hand, "Thank you. I…if we're really going to start fresh, that's a good place to start."

Loki did not return to his chambers until half-past midnight that evening. It had been a much more difficult enchantment to cast then he had originally assumed and it had drained him considerably. But it was done. The clear cells that had contained the Avengers were all empty.

The young god gazed at the doorway to their bedroom as he took a few steps towards it before he stopped himself. It was far too late to disturb her. He sauntered toward the sofa, pulling off his shoes before he collapsed on his back on the soft cushions. His dark green eyes gazing up at the ceiling. He was exhausted and he hated the weak feeling that always came over him when he strained the use of his powers as he did tonight. Still as tired as he was he knew he wasn't going to get a second of sleep.

He could already hear the racing of thoughts inside of his head. The doubts, the worries, the taunting voice that told him that because of his actions tonight he would be finding himself back inside one of those cells soon enough. Loki tried hard to think of something else, to force his mind to be quiet. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he tried to concentrate on a happy memory. He pictured Natasha in this very room when she danced for him. When he had foolishly blurted out that he loved her and to his amazement she had responded in kind. Loki smiled at the thought as his breathing began to settle.

The next morning, after a bath, Natasha slowly ventured out of the bedroom to sit on the couch. Being on bed rest, she couldn't stay on her feet for more than a few moments at a time. When she arrived at the couch, she found Loki laying there….actually sleeping.

She sat beside him and softly stroked his cheek before leaning over and pressing a kiss to his forehead.

Loki felt the soft touch of her lips in his sleep, his smile deepening as he slowly drifted awake. His dark green eyes blinked up at the sight of her sitting next to him. Still half asleep, he was certain that she was nothing more than a lovely dream. "So pretty," he mused. "My little spider, I miss you."

Natasha smiled at him for the first time in, for what felt like, ages. She kissed his lips softly and brushed her nose against his, "I'm right here…"

Loki's eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he awakened more fully when he felt her lips so sweetly caress his. "Natalia?" the young god whispered as he cautiously brushed his mouth along hers, his fingers twisting lightly around a lush, red curl. Relishing the feel of her lips as he let the sweet sensation wash over him.

Natasha kissed him deeply, but knew that she couldn't take it any further than that until she was taken off bed rest. She smiled and pressed her forehead against his, "Fresh start…"

Since Bruce was freed along with the rest of the team, Loki had to bring a doctor in to treat her for the remainder of her pregnancy. She was informed of the "high risk" nature of her condition, but wasn't filled in on the fact that her baby was half frost giant.

The doctor allowed Natasha off of bed rest and cleared her for most activities since non-stress tests revealed that the baby and her uterus were in good condition and no contractions were being experienced.

Things between she and Loki were quiet…but she gave him a heartfelt thank you for freeing her friends and vowed to work on forgiving him.

Their relationship seemed slow to return to what it used to be…until one night, Natasha was sitting on her yoga mat, stretching. Her spandex workout top fit tight across her burgeoning belly.

She was sitting there with her eyes closed, practicing her breathing and a pose when she suddenly felt a small thump from within her.

Thinking that it might have been gas…or something, she waited. Soon, she felt another small thump and gasped, placing a hand on her stomach. The baby was moving…the baby she'd practically been ignoring for the past few weeks. Finally, at 23 weeks, she was feeling her baby boy move…almost as if he was trying to get her attention and affection.

All at once, Natasha felt guilt overtake her. This baby wasn't to blame for what Loki had done. She rubbed a hand down her stomach as a few tears escaped her eyes, "Hey, kiddo…I'm sorry I've been so quiet lately…"

Loki reached for the doorknob of their penthouse but his fingers halted as they hovered just a hairsbreadth from touching it. He pulled his hand back as he stared at the door. When he had woken up to find her sitting next to him, he had been incredibly happy and hopeful. But he quickly realized that though she was very grateful for the release of the Avengers, she had not forgiven him. And he was beginning to think that she never would. His heart sank at the thought.

But he couldn't deny the facts. She hardly talked to him except for polite conversation or to thank him once again for letting her friends go. She was off of bed rest so he had dismissed the nurse who had been helping to care for her. Which left the guest room available for him to sleep. It was more comfortable than the couch but far from where he wanted to be.

It hurt to have her so close and yet feel the expansive distance that was between them. He had no one to blame for it but himself and he had no idea how to fix it. He had started to stay in the office late just to minimize the time that he would spend in the quiet of their apartment. The silence when they were in the room together felt deafening and every detached smile that she gave him was like a neon sign telling him that he ruined everything for good.

He exhaled slowly as he finally opened the door. Loki could see her sitting along her yoga mat in the empty space of the living room. Her back was to him and he decided against disturbing her as he walked towards the other room.

Natasha turned around, hearing the door open. She wiped her eyes, "Loki…hey."

She timidly held a hand out to him, "Come here…please."

She watched him hesitate before slowly walking over and taking her hand. She gave his arm a gentle tug and made him sit next to her as she placed his hand on her stomach.

"He's moving…" she said quietly.

Loki felt a flutter underneath his palm as he stared down at her belly in amazement. "That was him?" the young god gaped in almost disbelief before he felt it again. "He did it again! He's strong." His dark green eyes gazed up at hers before they fell away. He lifted his hand from her stomach and began to stand up. He doubted that she wanted him touching her for that long. "That's truly incredible, little spider. Thank you for sharing it with me." He gave her a soft smile as he took a step towards the kitchen.

The smile that had begun to tickle at the edges of her lips slowly faded as he got up and walked away. She gingerly got to her feet and followed him, "Loki…"

She paused in an effort to gather her thoughts, then fidgeted with her hands a bit, unable to figure out the right thing to say. Finally, she looked up at him with wet eyes and a sad smile, "I…love you…and I miss you…and I'd give absolutely anything for you to touch me the way you used to…"

Loki moved toward her swiftly and enclosed her face in his hands. "I want nothing more than that," Loki breathed against her lips before kissing her softly. "I miss you so much, little spider, I love you so much." His voice was husky and filled with emotion as he deepened the kiss, wrapping his arms around her as he pulled her closer.

Natasha kissed him back hungrily, wrapping her arms around his neck as she eagerly pressed against him. She'd desperately missed his touch…and she needed him more than she needed anything else. It may not have been healthy or right…but this love was theirs.

She barely registered her feet leaving the ground before he picked her up in his arms and carried her to their bed, where he proceeded to undress her. She smiled up at him and blushed before covering her middle. It had been a long time since they had sex…and she was far larger now than the last time he saw her naked.

Loki quirked an eyebrow as he watched her place her arms around her middle. He reached out and took both of her hands as he lifted them to his lips before setting her arms down on either side of the mattress. "You're beautiful, little spider, so incredibly sexy," He whispered with a sideways smile as he glided his hand along her belly before replacing it with his lips. It had been so long since he tasted her skin and he was determined to devour every inch of her body. "How I've ached for you, Natalia, in my heart, my body… every little bit of me has been aching for you."

"I've missed feeling you…touching you…kissing you. I love you so much…" she whimpered as he began trailing kisses up and down her body.

When they were sated and lying beside each other, panting, Natasha curled against him, pressing soft, kisses across his chest, "I never meant to punish you…I'm just…confused…but I love you too damn much…"

Loki wrapped his arms around her tighter, placing a soft kiss along her forehead as he breathed her in. She was really here. His body shivered at the feel of her lips brushing against his chest and he grinned widely as he peered down at her. "You had every right to never forgive me. I thought you didn't want me anymore and I couldn't blame you. But I'm glad I was wrong. I love you, Natalia and I love our son. I love you both so much."

"My love for you isn't conditional. It's there no matter what…and will always be" she said, leaning up to kiss him.

Finally, they were back on track. Natasha was slowly, but surely, growing more and more attached to their baby boy as he continued to move and squirm inside of her. By the time she was about 28 weeks pregnant, Loki came home to find her laying on their bed with a set of headphones on her ears, and a set on her stomach.

Loki grinned as he sat down at her side and pulled the headphones from her ears. "Let me see what kind of music you're subjecting our son to this evening," He jested as he placed it on his ears. "My poor boy," he teased with a furrowed brow and a sexy pout on his lips as he tossed the headphones back on the mattress before he leaned forward and began talking to her belly. "How long has she been forcing you to listen to this?" His dark green eyes winking up at her playfully.

Natasha laughed and reached down to idly play with his hair, "The music is supposed to be soothing…he's been beating the crap out of me recently and the doctor suggested this…she also says he's a little on the large side…easily nine pounds by the time I'm full term, apparently."

She chewed on her lip nervously before diverting her gaze, "I'm afraid…not just, about the birth or whatever but, I…" Natasha paused and looked away again before lowering her voice, "It's taken me so long to even begin to have a bond with this baby…and I…I guess, I'm just afraid I'm not gonna be a good mother…"

"I understand that sentiment all too well, little spider," Loki mused as he ran his fingers gently along her stomach. "I was not given the best of examples on how to be a father." He technically had two and neither one of them would he ever want to emulate. He hated the thought that his son could one day grow up and feel the same way about him. "But I love him already and I know that I would do anything for him and I hope that will be enough." He raised his dark green eyes to gaze up into hers. "I think you are already a wonderful mother. I can see the love you feel for him, the way you care for him. Our son is a very lucky little boy."

The Black Widow softly shook her head, "When you were busy staring at my stomach in awe, I was busy resenting it, still thinking that I made the wrong decision to keep him…does that sound like a wonderful mother to you?"

Natasha cringed slightly as her belly shifted, indicating that the child within had moved his whole body rather suddenly.

She vigorously rubbed the side of her belly, "God. It's like he's testing to see how far I stretch before he's able to bust out of there."

"That was my fault, little spider" Loki revealed honestly as he felt his son kick against his palm. "But even in the midst of all those feelings, whether it be resentment or just utter confusion for what you wanted, you took care of our child. You took your medicine, stayed still in a bed which I know you didn't like, you did whatever you needed to so that he would be safe and healthy despite how you felt. I think that makes you an amazing mother, Natalia." He leaned closer and kissed her lips softly.

Natasha kissed his lips and stared into his eyes, "…you know what I'm in the mood for right now?"

She smiled at the questioning look in his eyes as she pulled his mouth back to hers for another slow, sensuous kiss. Natasha nuzzled her nose against his for a brief second before whispering seductively against his lips, "Ice cream…with chocolate, caramel swirls and sea salt."

She giggled softly and leaned back against the headboard, sitting up like an eager child as she awaited her treat.

"Blame your son."

Loki smiled as he brought forth her frozen dessert with a wave of his hand. She took it and began devouring it greedily. She was smiling between spoonfuls and making exaggerated sounds of how good it was between giggles. She was positively glowing. She seemed to grow more beautiful every day.

"Have you thought of a name, yet, little spider?" He pondered as he caressed her belly tenderly. "Perhaps 'Caramel Swirl', Eh heh heh heh, since he likes it so much. It is more colorful then 'boy'." He winked playfully.

Natasha finished off her ice cream and set it aside, "While caramel swirl sounds…delicious, I think we should give him a regal name. He is a prince, after all, right? Maybe…Thomas?"

The baby favored her stomach with a hard kick. She laughed and pulled up her shirt, "He likes it."

"Thomas… Thomas," he repeated as he said the name slowly while he moved his fingers in slow circles along her belly. "Thomas Lokison… yes… I think I like it very much." He leaned forward and pressed his lips against her stomach as he gazed up at her dark blue eyes. "I think it's perfect, little spider."


	11. Chapter 11

Natasha continued her routine of yoga and frequent walks throughout the next several weeks. The leaves had begun to fall from the trees, and her due date was fast approaching. The further along she got in her pregnancy, the more she began to experience seemingly random spikes in her temperature. She and Loki monitored it carefully, but soon, concerns about her blood pressure began to arise, despite the fact that she'd been relaxing and taking extra precautions to stay calm.

As they sat with her doctor, they were told just how dire her situation was.

"Natasha, your blood pressure will not go down….and you seem to be suffering from random fevers that I can't find a solution for. I am sorry, but I have to suggest that we induce labor. At 33 weeks, the baby has a good chance of survival—"

Natasha quickly shook her head, "He's not ready. No. I won't do that."

"I understand your hesitation, but if you don't deliver soon…you could run the risk of seizure…and death. I can't guarantee you will live through a delivery if we wait much longer."

Natasha shook her head as tears formed in her eyes, "I'm not going to force my baby out of my body until he's ready. No. I'm going to give him his best shot."

Loki walked with her back to their penthouse in complete silence. The voice of the doctor was playing over and over in his head.

'If you don't deliver soon you could run the risk of seizure and death.'

'I can't guarantee you will live through a delivery if we wait much longer.'

He had never imagined when he was trying so hard to conceive this child that her life could be at risk because of the pregnancy. He had meant to keep her closer to him and now his actions could take her away from him forever. As much as he loved the little boy that was growing inside of her nothing meant more to him than Natasha. If he had to decide between the two of them, right or wrong, there was no question in his mind who he would choose.

He watched her move towards the kitchen as she poured herself a cup of water. The thought of anything happening to her scared him to death. He had even begun to think of ways that he could force her to do things his way. Perhaps, he could induce her labor himself with a spell of some kind and then she would have no choice. No. No. If she ever discovered that he was behind it, she would never trust him again.

"Natalia, I don't think you should be so hasty about deciding against an early delivery," he remarked finally. "The doctor said he would have a very good chance and I would make sure that they had everything they could possibly need to help him survive." He tucked a loose curl behind her ear as he gazed down at her pleadingly. "I cannot bear the thought of anything happening to you, little spider."

"Don't…" she said, setting her glass on the counter. "Don't even think of trying to change my mind. You, of all people, should be fighting for him. He's innocent. He's pure. I'm not. Even if I did die trying to bring him into this world, it would be worth it because he deserves a chance to be born healthy. I told you I wouldn't lose another child, I meant it…"

Natasha lowered her eyes and sighed, "If I do die…you'll still have a part of me that no one else has…"

"Don't say that… don't you ever say that to me again," Loki ordered mournfully. His eyes filled to the brim with unshed tears. "You can't… die and I don't want to hear that word again. What good would I be to our son without you? Have you thought of that?" He moved toward the living room as he began to pace the floor, brushing his fingers through his hair as he always did when he was unnerved as he was now. He had no control over anything and he was beside himself with worry. He felt helpless. It was not a feeling that he dealt with well. "Have you thought of the embittered, miserable tyrant that you're going to leave him with? Have you thought of what it would do to me to be without you? You're my heart, Natalia. And if you go then you take it with you and there will be nothing left for him." The young god turned to face her once more as the first tear began to fall despite all of his inward protests to stop it. "I would try.. I would give him everything I had left but how much is that when you're a shell of yourself."

His words struck her to the core and caused a painful clenching in her chest. Natasha rushed to him and pulled him to her for a tight embrace. She leaned back and took his face in her hands before kissing his lips softly, "Loki…I love you so much…and I don't want to leave you, but if our son doesn't make it because of a decision we made…I won't be the Natalia you know and love anymore anyways. I'll die inside. I can't lose another child, Loki. I won't survive it. My body might be here, but I won't. I'll be dead inside…there won't be any more smiles…no more making love…no more snarky comments during bad movies or kicking your ass at Scrabble. I could not recover from losing this baby…please. Please, Loki. Promise me you'll be here for him if I'm not. I know it's hard to think of, but I just want our baby to be healthy and loved…please."

"It seems we are at an impasse," Loki whispered softly as he covered her hands with his. "You think that if you don't risk your life for our son that you would be dead inside if you lost him and I know that if I lose you that I will be the same." His dark green eyes fell at their feet. It was too difficult for him to look into her pleading stare without giving in to whatever she wanted. "I can't promise to give him something that I will no longer have in me. I will keep him safe, he will have every luxury, but I… the man I am right now, he will go with you… "

Natasha kissed him and wrapped her arms around him as she lay her head on his chest. She understood where Loki was coming from…but she couldn't possibly live with the decision he was asking her to make.

"I'm sorry, Loki…I'm sorry. I can't put him at risk. I won't. I can't…"

Loki wrapped his arms around her tighter. The thought of losing her was too much. "It's not that I don't…" he began as he moved his hand to caress her belly. "I love you both… there is nothing I wouldn't do to keep him safe but I need you… like I need air to breathe." The emotions became too much as he tried to steel himself from the ache that was overtaking him. He let go of her abruptly as he strutted towards the window and gazed down at the city below. "I understand you wanting to give every chance that you can to save our son," Loki advised, his voice devoid of emotion as he did his best to hide behind a stoic veneer. "And if it was his only chance than I wouldn't have even asked but it isn't. If you induced the labor than there is a possibility for the three of us but instead you insist on sentencing the two men in your life to a lifetime of misery." He turned around swiftly. "I should see if there is anything that needs my attention… don't wait up for me," the young god remarked coolly as he strutted towards the door.

Natasha watched him leave. By now, she was used to him hiding behind that cold, stoic exterior when his emotions became too overwhelming for him to properly express them.

She puttered around the apartment, did some yoga, and recorded a video for her unborn child before taking a long, relaxing bath. By the time he returned, it was nearly two in the morning. Natasha sat up in bed and stared at him as he entered their bedroom, "come here…"

Natasha took his hand and pulled him down onto the bed beside her, "I've been doing some reading and…he'll be considered full term at 37 weeks. Let's just try to make it to 35 and a half or 36 weeks, ok? Just two to three more weeks."

Loki nodded softly brushing his lips against her belly over the fabric of her top. "I'm not good at these things… I'm far too selfish," he whispered as he rested his head gently along her middle and wrapped his arm protectively along her waist, his hand resting on her hip. "I shouldn't have burdened you with my… my worries, you have enough of your own. I'm sorry, little spider."

"I just want you to know how much I do love you…I hate to see you upset. I know you're frightened…I am too. In a way it gives me comfort to know I'm not the only scared one…"

Natasha softly stroked his face before falling asleep with his arms around her.

The following two and a half weeks were rough, but by some miracle, she made it through. Loki arranged for her to have a suite at a nearby hospital, and as agreed, at 36 weeks, she was to be induced.

As they got settled into the hospital room, Natasha pulled out her phone and started filming herself. Now that they'd made it to this point, she was relieved and excited. She held the phone up, "Ok. It's about 8 o'clock in the morning and we're at the hospital to have you, baby Thomas. Daddy is here." She turned the phone around to show Loki as the nurse attached her IV for her pitocin drip, "Daddy, do you have anything to say to your son?"

"I wish to say hello and that I feel very awkward talking into a phone," Loki smiled as he twirled his fingers around a lock of her hair. He was nervous although he tried not to show it. "I look forward to meeting you, little prince. I look forward to seeing you in your mother's arms."

Natasha laughed and turned her phone back to herself as she leaned over and kissed Loki's cheek as she filmed them, "See how handsome your father is? I hope you get his dimples. So, we're getting started here…and I'll see you soon, kiddo. Can't wait…"

She stopped recording as the nurse smiled at her as they hooked her up to a fetal monitor and blood pressure monitor, "that's so sweet…"

Soon, they heard the baby's heartbeat, which Natasha requested they turn down after a few moments because she felt herself begin to panic every time the baby's heart rate fluctuated.

Natasha soon began to feel the contractions start thanks to the pitocin coursing through her veins. The monitor helped Loki warn her when the contractions were starting, then let her know when they were leveling off thanks to the peaks and valleys showing there.

Natasha laid on her side, gripping onto the rail of her hospital bed with one hand as she held tightly to Loki's hand with the other, breathing deeply through a contraction.

"This one has almost passed," Loki soothed as he ran his fingers along her hair, his other hand firmly in her grip as she breathed through the contraction. "You are doing amazing." Natasha exhaled a sigh of relief as the pain finally ebbed. He knew that it wouldn't be long before the next one. They were coming at about every four minutes now. He wished there was something he could do for her. He felt useless standing here why she suffered so. He leaned down and kissed her forehead. "Soon you will be holding our baby." He whispered as he tried to lift her spirits. He knew she was exhausted. "Soon Thomas will be gripping your finger just as you're holding mine, little spider."

Natasha let out a weak, shaky moan and nodded slowly as the contraction slowly passed. She turned her head from where it had been hiding in the pillows so that she could see him and gave him a weary smile, "I…dreamed about him. I could practically see what he looked like…big blue eyes. Like mine, but, you take one look at him and I could immediately see you."

A nurse walked in and checked the papers that had printed out, tracking the baby's heart rate through her contractions. She frowned slightly and pulled an oxygen mask out from behind the bed and arranged it over Natasha's face, "Looks like the little one isn't liking labor very much…let's try turning you onto your left side and see if that helps things…"

Loki moved to the other side of the bed putting his hand in hers and squatted at her side so that his eyes were level with hers while they peeked above her breathing mask. "It is almost here," the young god forewarned as he noticed the lines along the monitor. Another contraction was just seconds away. He ran his fingers along her forehead as her grip tightened on his hand. She groaned loudly as the pain reached its peak, trying her best to breathe through it. "Big blue eyes like his mother. I hope that is true," he began as he tried to take some of her focus away from the pain. "And its near certainly guaranteed that he is going to be stubborn and willful. He will be a delicious little handful I'm sure." He gave her a sideways smile as the contraction ended and he leaned in to kiss her forehead once more.

Natasha panted and laid her head back against the pillow as she moaned again, "Loki…I can't…something's wrong…."

As if on queue, the monitor that had been keeping track of their son's heart rate began to beep. A nurse quickly entered the room, heading straight for the monitor. She picked up the paper and quickly pressed a button on the opposite end of the wall. The contraction monitor began to randomly peak and valley as Natasha cried out, desperately grasping at his hand, "Oh god!"

"What in the name of Hel is going on?" Loki barked as he watched the nurse rush about the room while Natasha cried out in pain, her grip on his hand getting tighter and the monitor readings were so jumbled up they no longer made any sense to him. "Are you deaf, woman? What is happening to her?"

"Sir, please remain calm. The baby is in distress. His heart rate is dangerously low. The doctor is on her way in right now." Another nurse checked her blood pressure, "Blood pressure is spiking. Do we have an OR ready for her?"

The room came alive with medical personnel as they fussed over her, removing the pitocin drip and replacing it with something else as the doctor entered. She quickly examined Natasha, "Have them prep OR 1, we're on our way down there right now. Natasha, you need to calm down, alright? Stay calm. We're going to have to perform an emergency C-section. The baby's heart rate is very low. We need to get him out."

"Everything's going to be alright, Natasha," Loki soothed as he kissed her forehead. He could see the tears welling up in her eyes. He knew she was scared. "Our son is going to be fine and so are you, little spider."

They lifted her onto a gurney as they began to wheel her towards the door. The nurse pressed her palm to his chest as he felt Natasha's hand separate from his. "I'm sorry, sir, but no one is allowed in the operating room during emergency C-section's. I will show where the waiting room is."

"What?" Loki gaped as he watched them take her away. The nurse explained the procedure to him as he followed her out into the room where he was told to wait but he didn't hear a word that she said. He couldn't think at all. What had just happened?

Natasha was afraid, but she tried hard not to let her fear affect her already high blood pressure, or the fever that was spiking. She heard yelling, but as they wheeled her into the OR, the sounds grew further and further away. They placed a mask over her face to help put her under. An eerie peace settled over her as the bright lights faded to darkness.

An hour later, the doctor entered the waiting room to speak to Loki, "I…your son should be fine. He's being seen by our neonatologist right now because he was having a tough time breathing right after he was born…but they think he should be fine." The doctor lowered her eyes and rocked on her heels briefly, "Natasha suffered a seizure during the operation. She…she's in a coma."

"Coma? What do you mean?" Loki gaped as he stood there in shock. Everything felt like it was happening to someone else.

"She is unconscious. It was brought on by the sudden onset of Eclampsia," the doctor replied cautiously. "I'm sorry. There is no way for us to know at this point when or if she will awaken."

"May I see her?" the young god inquired meekly.

Loki was brought to her room. He wasn't prepared for the sight that was before him. She was so pale and all the wires and machinery that were monitoring her vitals were unnerving. He took her hand in his but there was no reaction. It didn't even feel like she was sleeping. She always moved a little in her sleep, making cute little noises when she did so. Now, she looked lifeless, her face was devoid of color and there wasn't even the slightest twitch of her eyelids. He pulled the chair closer so that he could sit down as he held her hand tightly in his.

"Natalia?" Loki entreated as he raised her hand to his lips. "Natalia, our son is born and they say he is going to be fine. I know you must be so tired. It's okay if you rest now but I need you to wake up soon. Thomas needs you to wake up very soon. Alright, little spider?"

The young god refused to move from her side. Three days past and there was no change. The nurses constantly asked if he wanted to be brought to the NICU to see his son but he refused. He didn't want to see him until Natasha was awake. The doctor attempted to insist that he leave at least for a few hours to get some rest but one look from his dark emerald eyes and she quickly left the room.

What if she never woke up? What if her condition worsened? He couldn't stand the feeling of helplessness that had overtaken him. He was a sorcerer and a demigod but what did all his power give him if he could do nothing for the woman that he loved? He would give anything for her to open her eyes, to hear her voice. It was then that his eyes drifted to her things that had been set along her bedside table. Her phone. Loki remembered the recording that she had done right before they induced labor. He picked up the small contraption as he attempted to figure out how to get it to play the video that she had made.

After pressing several buttons something finally began to play. It was her but she was in their home. She was talking to their son about the possibility that she might never meet him. Tears began to fall unbidden down the young god's eyes as he listened to her words.

_"I want you to know that, despite some of the things he may say or do, your father loves you very very much."_

He had barely thought of the boy since he was born. Some father he was. He just couldn't be around him. Not without her, he couldn't.

_"I just want to tell you that I love you, I wish I could meet you.."_

He had been out in the world for three whole days and he was all alone, he thought suddenly. Natasha would give anything to meet him and he had left him all alone. As the video clicked off, he couldn't help but remember the request she had made to him. The one that he had stubbornly refused to agree to.

"_Promise me you'll be here for him if I'm not. I know it's hard to think of, but I just want our baby to be healthy and loved…please."_

"I'm so sorry, little spider," Loki whimpered at her side as he laid his head against her shoulder. "I told you I'm no good at these things. I want what I want and what I want is you. It's not his fault. It's mine. I'm the reason that you're lying here right now. I know what you would want me to do. Perhaps, it is time I thought of someone besides myself." He leaned up and brushed his lips against her cheek as he released her hand and prepared to go see his son for the first time.

He gazed at the baby inside of the incubator as he pressed his fingers along the plastic. His eyes were closed but his arms and legs were moving fitfully and he could hear his soft cries through the small case. The first thing he noticed was the faint sheen of black hair.

"Would you like to hold him? We can place a chair next to the incubator, the leads are long enough that we could put him in your arms if you like." the young nurse advised. Loki nodded as he sat down. He wasn't prepared for the eruption of emotion that would come upon him when he felt the little boy settle into his arms.

"Hello, Thomas, I'm sorry I'm so late," Loki whispered as the child opened his eyes. The tears glided down the young god's cheeks as he stared at the precious little being that he and Natasha had created. "You have your mother's eyes," he smiled as he kissed him softly.

Before the seizure that forced her to slip into her coma, Natasha remembered one final thing that the nurses said as they pulled her son's limp form from her body. She was under, and felt detached from her body, but she could still sense and hear many of the things that were happening in the operating room. Then, she felt an immense amount of pressure before a weight was lifted out of her.

He's not breathing.

It sounded so far away, but it was as clear as day for her. She panicked. No. No. He was alive. He was alright. He has to be. He has to be alright.

That was the last thing she remembered.

For the first several days, there was nothingness. She was completely unaware of the world outside of the blackness within her mind. But on the seventh day, she felt herself begin to become distantly aware of the world around her, and she had a desire to actually communicate with it, but her body wouldn't cooperate. It felt like she was still too weak to even force her brain to convey messages to her limbs and to her eyelids.

_'Open. Open your eyes, Nat…come on.'_

She faintly heard Loki's voice and, for days, she desperately reached out for it. She wished she could speak to him…ask him if their son had lived. If he was alright…but she just lay there, a limp slab of flesh.

Where was her baby? Was her sacrifice for nothing? He HAD to live.

If he was…she prayed that Loki was taking care of him. She couldn't bear the thought of her tiny baby boy all alone in a lonely incubator.

Meanwhile, in the land of the living, the nurses were proud to announce that Thomas' oxygen levels were high enough for him to come out of his incubator, and his billi blanket had worked to keep his jaundice at bay. They arranged for him to be moved into the room with Natasha.

When they rolled his hospital crib into the room where Loki was holding vigil at Natasha's bed side….where he had for the past 9 days, Thomas immediately began to cry and fuss.

The sound reached Natasha's ears and she began battling against the weakness of her body to come back. The keening cry was empowering her in a way she'd never known. That was her baby. That was her son. He was alive…and he NEEDED her.

_'Wake up….wake up, Nat. They need you. There's no way Loki could handle this by himself. The god of mischief, changing poopie diapers? Open your fucking eyes!'_

Natasha took a deep breath as her hand weakly tightened around Loki's. It took another several moments before she forced her voice into action. It was dry and cracked from lack of use, "Give 'em….t'me…"

Loki sat at her side holding her hand, talking to her as he always did. For the past six days he had been splitting his time between the two of them. He spent the early mornings and late afternoons with his son and the rest of the time he sat here talking to her sleeping form. He would tell her about their baby, about how well he had taken his bottle or how he drove the nurses crazy by kicking off his monitor leads. He would talk about the things that they would do together when she was well and of course, he would beg her to wake up. But she never did.

The young god glanced at the doorway as the nurses wheeled Thomas' hospital crib into the room and smiled faintly. They had told him when he was visiting him this morning that his son was well enough to be placed in a regular crib and brought to her room. It was wonderful news and now he didn't have to leave either of them. Still, he couldn't muster up too much excitement. It had been nine days and Natasha had shown not even the slightest sign of improvement.

Thomas began to cry as they settled his crib at her bedside. The young god stood up immediately, his hand still tightly enclosed around hers. He was about to let her hand go so that he could pick up their baby when he felt her fingers tighten around his. Loki froze as he stared down at their joined hands. Was he seeing things? Had she really squeezed his hand? Then he heard her voice.

"Natalia!" Loki gasped as his dark green eyes searched her face frantically. Her eyelids were fluttering as if she were trying to open them. "Natalia? That's it, little spider, open your eyes. Thomas is right here and he is waiting for you."

Natasha's eyes slowly opened, but she shut them tight again. God…has the world been that bright when she left it? The light stung her eyeballs and felt like it was stabbing directly through to her brain. Despite that, she forced them open, slower this time…

"Loki…" she whispered before swallowing hard in an effort to coat her desert-dry throat. She could really go for a coke or sprite…or anything. "Loki…is he ok? I need…I need to see him…"

Loki pressed his mouth against hers as he grinned like a little boy at Christmas. She was awake. Those gorgeous pouty lips were finally moving again and he couldn't be more happy.

"Yes, little spider, yes," he divulged as he rushed toward the crib. "He is perfect." He reached down and picked up his son, cradling him in his arms as he returned to her bed side. He wasn't sure if she would be strong enough to hold him. He laid him down in the crook of her arm as he kept his hand on his belly for support. "Here Thomas," he grinned. "Here is your Mommy. See I didn't exaggerate. Did I, little prince? There is nothing more beautiful in this world than your mother's smile."

The newly arrived nurse came in the help adjust her bed and take her vitals while Natasha stared at the tiny bundle I'm her arms. Tears flowed freely down her face as she brought a trembling hand up to stroke the black cap of hair that covered his tiny head.

"Exactly how I dreamed…my beautiful boy…I was afraid I'd never see you…" she whispered before looking up at Loki with a teary smile, "He has my eyes…but he looks like you. Just like I told you…"

"I'm afraid he has my personality as well," Loki winked as his lips upturned in a half-smile. "The nurses in the NICU gave him the nickname of tiny terror because he kept pulling out his leads and setting their alarms off for no reason." He leaned over and kissed her forehead softly. "I love you, Natalia." he whispered as he brushed his lips across her temple. "Don't ever leave me again."

It took another two weeks before she and Thomas were released from the hospital. During her hospital stay, Natasha stubbornly got Thomas to transition back from the bottle to nursing. It was hard work, and at times, even the nurses were unsure if she'd have success, but Thomas eventually took to his mother's milk, much to her relief. They didn't even see each other for nine days after his birth. Rebuilding a bond of this nature was almost unheard of.

When they walked into the penthouse and Natasha lay their son in his crib, she just stood over him, watching him sleep. Every so often, when the pacifier he held in his mouth almost fell out, he'd jerk a little and start sucking anew, making his mother chuckle softly.

"Beautiful…"

"Yes, very beautiful," Loki whispered against her ear as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. "And so is our son." He kissed her neck softly before nuzzling his chin along her shoulder. "Having you both here with me is… there are no words, little spider. It is all I've wanted for so long."

Natasha smiled and turned around in his embrace, wrapping her arms around him as she kissed his lips, "I thought I'd never get to meet him. I thought I'd never see you again…"

She rested her forehead against his, "I love you so much…"

"I love you, my little spider," Loki grinned as he stared into her dark blue eyes. All those days he thought that he might never see her open them again. It was still hard for him to accept that he wasn't dreaming. "And now that the two of you are home… I couldn't be happier. I want to do something for you. Anything at all. Is there a treat you would like? or I don't know, a new book you wanted to read? Is there something you've always wanted that you never thought to ask for? I think I'll burst if I don't get to do something special for you. I intend to grant the mother of my son's every whim."

Natasha smiled a little and blushed prettily before she bit her bottom lip, "Maybe…maybe you might consider making me an honest woman? Give me a title other than your son's mother…maybe you might think of making me your wife…"

"My wife? I'm sorry, Natalia," Loki murmured softly. "How stupid of me… I never imagined that you would want to… with me. And now you probably think that I… I should have done something months ago. This should be a romantic moment. It should be something you always remember. You shouldn't have to prompt me." He shook his head slightly as he gazed at her. She wanted to be his wife. She wanted to vow to spend the rest of her life with him. He could hardly believe that she truly loved him that much. "There's nothing I want more than to have you with me forever." The young god backed away from her for a moment. "No, this won't do at all. You deserve everything to be perfect."

Natasha glanced into their son's crib and slowly pulled Loki out of the nursery, "I don't need perfection. I need you. Anything outside of that is just a bonus."

She kissed his lips and hugged him tight, "Don't worry about it. We can do it when he's older, or you can ask when you're ready. I didn't mean to rush or anything…"

Within two months, Natasha was fully recovered, and their little Thomas had grown and exceeded doctor's expectations. He still woke up every two hours during the night, so it wasn't out of the ordinary for Loki to wake up and find Natasha laying on her side with their son attached to her breast.

Loki grinned widely as he opened his eyes to gaze at his wife and son. "Good morning, little spider," he smiled as he gently brushed his fingers along his son's head. "I have a lot of business to do this morning but I was hoping that you might bring him down to the throne room today. That way I could get to see him and he could see where he will one day reign." The truth was that he had a much bigger reason for wanting her there. Natasha nodded in agreement as she continued to nurse their son and Loki got up from the bed as he prepared to finalize his plans.

Loki stood in front of his throne as he observed the painting that he had hung behind the dais. He had painted it himself. It had been a long time since he had picked up a paint brush and he was a little nervous about how it would turn out but he wanted to do something extra special to show her how much she meant to him. It was a portrait of her holding their son. She was wearing an elegant green dress befitting a Queen and her left hand was clearly visible as it rested against their son's chest. Her ring finger was adorned with a large diamond ring and matching band. The real ones were resting in his pocket as he fidgeted nervously waiting for the two of them to arrive.

Natasha had to change her shirt, thanks to the fact that her son waited until his diaper was completely off before he decided to turn into a human fountain and hose her down.

The new mother rushed into the throne room, her eyes on her son as she readjusted his bib to catch a little dribble on his chin, "I'm so sorry I'm late. I was—-" Her voice cut off and she gasped upon seeing the painting.

"Loki…what's this? Did you do this? It's beautiful", she said with a bright smile. She slowly shifted Thomas in her arms and stepped closer, staring at the detailing of the painting. It was perfect…but wait…

"The…the ring…" she whispered as she turned her eyes toward him

"Yes, I painted it," Loki beamed as he watched her eyes look over the portrait. "I had to do it from memory. It is much easier when you have a model in front of you but I'm quite pleased with how it turned out. Though you are so much more beautiful in person." The young god grinned widely as she took note of the rings. He moved closer to her as he knelt down on one knee in front of her.

"Do you like it, little spider?" he inquired as he pulled the rings out of his pocket and held them out in his hand. He took a deep breath as he tried to settle his nerves before he began. "I know that I am the farthest thing from an ideal husband. I'm possessive and quick-tempered and stubborn and extremely selfish. I would like to say that I could change and become more of the man that you deserve but I think we both know that would be a lie. I would like to say that you will never regret marrying me but with who I am the odds are not in my favor." He smiled slightly. His heartbeat was thundering in his chest. What if she changed her mind? What if she was more than happy with things as they were? "But I can honestly say that I will never regret it if you marry me. And I will do everything in my power to make you happy. Natalia, I love you so much and I will love you for the rest of my days. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"


	12. Chapter 12

Natasha's mouth dropped open as she somehow remained aware that her son was in her arms. She remembered the conversation they had the day that they brought Thomas home, and she wasn't so sure he was on board with the idea of marrying her.

Now was confirmation that he was.

His speech was beautiful, heartfelt and very true. He was possessive and selfish, but dammit…she loved the flawed god who knelt before her. She couldn't imagine loving another man more.

Natasha didn't realize tears had been brimming in her eyes until she blinked and felt one streak down her face. She let out a shuddering breath and nodded, "Yes. Yes. Absolutely."

Loki grinned widely as he listened to her words. His dimples in full force and his tongue played lightly against his teeth as he chuckled slightly.

"You have made me so happy, little spider," He smiled as he stood up, kissing her lips softly before he slid the diamond along her finger, the wedding band still resting in his hand. He watched her dark blue eyes as she glanced at it curiously. "Eh heh heh heh, you may wonder why I'm holding both. If you go over to that table," He motioned with his hand as he lifted their son from her arms. "There is a myriad of catalogs with all types of dresses. I want you to pick your favorite and I will bring it forth for you. I intend to marry you today, my little spider."

Natasha smiled nervously and laughed, gingerly handing off their son to him, "Picking my wedding dress in a few minutes. No pressure there at all, huh?"

She flipped through the pages of white dresses for almost an hour before she finally spotted something that caught her eye.

"Vera Wang…" she murmured with a small smile. "This isn't traditional…but it's beautiful…"

Loki watched as she walked toward the catalogs and began perusing the pages. He conjured his son's carriage and laid him down gently before ordering the guards to bring the minister and the witnesses for the wedding into the hall at once.

He strutted towards her and glanced over her shoulder taking a look at the dress that she had picked. It was a dark crimson and the bottom reminded him of a bouquet of roses. "It's perfect, little spider," he grinned and with a wave of his fingers she was adorned in the gorgeous red gown and he was decked in his royal uniform. He took a step backward while his bright emerald eyes roamed her body appreciatively as he took her hands in his. "Splendid, by the nines, Natalia, you are so incredibly beautiful. The most exquisite woman that has ever lived and in a few moments you will be my wife. I can't wait, my little spider, I truly can't."

Natasha blushed and looked down, "Thank you…you look extremely handsome yourself."

She pressed herself close to emphasize her point, "Is it too early to kiss my groom—-" the moment was interrupted by the arrival of the witnesses and the minister. She took a half step away from him, but kept his hands on hers as she glanced over at their sleeping son, "When do we get started?"

"At once," He smirked with a devilish glint in his eyes as he walked her towards the minister. With another flourish of his fingers the entire chamber became bedecked with different colored roses. The ceremony began as the clergyman asked them the traditional Midgardian vows to which they both replied 'I do.' The young god's grin was near to bursting as he watched those words leave her lips. He was anxious to put the ring on her finger and hear the words 'you are now husband and wife'.

The minister held the wedding bands in his hand as he asked if they had any special words to say to one another before they exchanged rings.

"The first time I saw you. I thought you were beautiful and manipulative and cunning, a woman after my own icy heart," Loki mused. "You beat me at my own game and that infuriated me and intrigued me at the same time. I never expected to fall in love with you. I closed off my heart so tightly I had forgotten that I could even feel at all. I can never thank you enough for all you've given me, my little spider."

The minister motioned for him to take the wedding band as he repeated the words that he gave him to say.

The young god slipped the band onto her finger. "With this ring, Natalia, I thee wed."

Natasha smiled up at him and squeezed his hands tight, laughing softly as he retold their story. It had an amazing beginning, and she couldn't wait to tell their son.

"Loki, I never expected to fall in love with you either, but, as with everything else in my life, the best things happen to me when I'm not expecting it. You…Thomas. I've fallen more deeply in love it's you than I ever thought possible, and, somehow, each day, I fall even harder for you. I will love you with everything I have in me…for all eternity. I promise you that. With this ring, Loki…I thee wed."

She smiled and slipped his wedding ring onto his finger before bouncing on her heels a bit. The minister announced, "You may now seal your union with a kiss."

Loki wasted no time at all as he captured her lips with his own, breaking away from her slightly as he peered down into her dark blue eyes. "Now you are officially mine in every way possible, Natalia. My beautiful wife… My Queen… My exquisite little spider," he grinned between soft feathering kisses. It was hard to believe how perfect his world had become.

Natasha kissed him back, smiling against his lips as the gathered witnesses favored them with polite applause and well wishes. She smirked, "We need to get a nanny so we can go on our honeymoon."

"Consider it done," Loki smirked as he trailed his fingers along her bare shoulder. She looked so delicious and it felt like an eternity since they had been together. He knew her body needed time to heal from the pregnancy and the surgery and he didn't mind waiting. Still he was anxious for the moment when he could be one with her again. "Tell me, my beautiful wife, where would you like to go?"

Natasha wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him lovingly as she moaned against his lips, "Fiji…"

The witnesses dispersed, leaving the family alone as Natasha and Loki began swaying together to music that began wafting through the air. "I love you, my husband…I love saying that."

"And I love hearing it, little spider," Loki grinned as he twirled her before pulling her back so that she was flush against him once more. "So Fiji? Give me a few minutes and I will have the arrangements made and I can bring us there this evening. If that would please my gorgeous wife?" The young god smiled as he began to place a series of soft, suckling kisses along her throat and down her bare shoulder. "You truly do taste divine, my little spider. I am a very lucky man."

Natasha moaned as her body shivered against him. It had been almost ten long weeks since Thomas' birth, and even longer since they'd made love. She was healed up and ready to go.

"It does please her…" she murmured through her parted lips. "I want you so badly…"

Loki had all the arrangements made. A gorgeous honeymoon suite in a luxury resort complete with an adjoining room for the new Nanny. With his magic he brought them there within seconds and they were settling themselves in the rooms in no time at all. He drank in the gorgeous sight of his wife as she gazed out the window at the view of the island. He moved behind her as his lips nuzzled along the soft spot behind her ear, his hands settling along her hips as he pressed his body closer.

"I seem to remember you mentioning that there was something that you wanted," Loki breathed huskily in her ear. "very badly, little spider."

Natasha's eyes rolled closed as she reached behind her to deftly unfasten his pants and push her hand into his underwear, "Quite the memory you have, my love…"

His hands roamed over her body, eliciting moans and gasps of excitement as her fingers slowly wrapped around his member. As his lips connected with her neck, another low moan escaped her lips, "Loki…I want you…please…"

Loki groaned at the sensation of her hands caressing his growing arousal. By the nines, it had been far too long since they had been this close. He lifted her into the air and carried her to the king-size bed as he laid her down, her clothes disappearing the moment that her body touched the mattress. He grinned down at her wickedly before he moved his lips along her inner thigh as he placed his mouth on her pulsating core. Her entire body shuddered beneath him at the contact and the sound of his name falling from her lips made his own body harden to the point of pain but he was determined not to end his assault until she came undone.

The young god took in the sight of her splayed on the sheets as she shuddered uncontrollably from her climax. He moved his lips slowly up her abdomen, the trembling of her skin thrilled him as he made his way up to her breasts. His driving need rubbing against her teasingly as he ran his tongue along one lush rosy nipple. "By the nines, how I've missed you, little spider. I adore every inch of your body."

Natasha eagerly wrapped her legs around his hips as she felt him brush against her entrance. She arched beneath him as she felt him enter her, gasping as he seated himself fully inside of her, "My god…oh my king…my husband."

He began a thrusting rhythm, slowly building up his intensity in an effort to allow her to get re-acclimated to him being inside of her. Natasha's hands roamed down his back as her nails grazed over his back, leaving red marks along his porcelain skin.

"I love you…"

"Valhalla," he groaned as she lifted her hips to his thrusting body. Her nails scraped along his back and he delighted in the delicate pain of it. "I love you… my Natalia.. mine.." the young god stuttered as he felt her body undulating, rippling around him. There was nothing more pleasurable in all the realms than the feeling of being inside of her. She screamed against his throat as a profound shudder took over her body, taking him with her as he was overcome by the longest, hottest release of his life.

His dark green eyes gazed down at her, his breathing warm and erratic as he tried to remember how to speak. "The Queen of my heart," he whispered huskily. "My wife… the world has nothing more to offer me, little spider, you have given me everything."

Natasha panted as she smiled up at him, reaching up to take his face in her hands and bring his lips down to hers for a sensuous kiss. "I love you so much…you're my world, Loki…my entire world…"

She kissed him again and nuzzled her face against his, "If you had told me eighteen months ago that I'd have a son with and be married to Loki…God of Lies and mischief, I wouldn't have believed you…but I'm so glad that it happened."

Loki settled himself at her side as he propped his head on his elbow, his other hand gliding languidly up and down her arm as he took in the sight of her naked body. She was truly a sight to behold and she was all his.

"Yes, little did I know when I looked into the eyes of the Black Widow that I was gazing at my future wife," Loki grinned widely. "Though I was very attracted to you from the very first second, you looked so succulent in all that black leather. It was very distracting."

Natasha laughed softly and blushed before shaking her head and briefly covering her face, "That actually wasn't on purpose. That outfit was actually very functional…"

Her smile slowly fell from her face. She hated to bring things down on their honeymoon, but she wanted to try to keep the air clear between them.

She met his eyes and smiled slightly, gently brushing a finger down his cheek, "I had a follow up appointment with my doctor…and she said that…due to some of the complications I had during Thomas' birth…he's the only child we will have. I wasn't planning on us having anymore after how difficult his pregnancy was, but I…thought it was important for you to know."

"All that matters to me is that you are here and Thomas is here," Loki revealed honestly. He captured a loose curl between his fingers as he twisted it languidly against his thumb. "I think our family is perfect as it is, my little spider. I don't need anything else. It still feels almost like a dream to me that I have a family… a real family that no one and nothing can ever take away from me."

Natasha leaned forward and kissed him lovingly on the lips. She rolled her body on top of his as she straddled his hips, rubbing against him sensually, "I love you so much…I'm yours my love, forever…no one will ever take me away from you. I promise."

She stared down into his green eyes for several moments, "Let me see your Jotun form…please?"

Loki closed his eyes and gasped at the sensation of her body rubbing against him as she straddled him. His hands immediately gripping her hips as he opened his eyes and licked his lips expectantly. He wasn't prepared for her next words. "Wasn't once enough," he jested self-consciously. "It's not a look that grows on you believe me."

Natasha leaned down and pressed soft kisses down his jawline and nipped at his ear as she whispered, "I told you I love you…I mean that I love ALL of you…you're sexy, handsome…and insanely beautiful to me, no matter what form you're in. Trust me, my love…let me see…"

Loki sighed at the feeling of her lips trailing along his throat as she nipped playfully at his ear, the sensation of her body as she continued to rub against him. His hunger to have her again growing by the second but he was also filled with a nervousness and trepidation over what she was asking. He spent most of his time trying to forget that he was a Frost Giant. The sight of his blue skin always unnerved him. Yet, she was his wife. She was a part of him and he wanted to please her. He wanted to give himself to her in every way. If that was what she wanted.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he began to let his true nature take over. He could feel the cold moving slowly up his arms, he didn't need to see the transformation take place to know that it was happening. His blood red eyes opened to stare into her dark blue irises. "Don't feel like you need to prove something to me," he whispered as he dropped his gaze. "You don't… I already know you love me."

Natasha placed a hand on the side of his face, the cold soothing her body against the heavy, humid tropical air. She kissed his lips and smiled down at him as she stared into his bright, crimson orbs, "I'm not proving anything to you…I know you are well aware of how much I love you. What you're not aware of is how beautiful I believe you are…I love the way your body feels against mine when you're like this…"

Natasha rubbed against him provocatively as she trailed kisses down his neck, "I love you so much…I've never wanted anyone more than I want you. I need your touch…"

Loki trailed his hands up and down her body, he could feel the tremor that his frosty touch caused as he caressed her skin. When her lips suckled along the ridged markings that adorned his shoulder his body convulsed as he gasped in pleasure. The intricate patterns covered his entire form when he was like this. His face, his shoulders, his arms as the lines traveled down his abdomen. He never expected them to feel good to the touch. "Valhalla," he gaped. "please… do that again, little spider."

Natasha obeyed his request as she allowed her tongue to rove over the markings on his body, delicately exploring every raised rune on his flesh as her hands softly caressed him. She felt the tremors in his body and began moving in earnest, encouraged by his moans and gasps.

Loki groaned in rapture, his hands fisting the sheets as her lips made their way to the markings along his pelvic bone. "By the nines," he nearly growled as the tremors flooded his body. "oh… Natalia." The pleasure was so good it was almost painful, a delicious torment. But his need for her became too great as he grabbed her by the shoulders suddenly, pulling her back up his body before he flipped them, entering her in one swift motion. The feeling of his icy member inside of the warmth of her body was almost unbearable as he began to thrust slowly into her. "You feel so good, Natalia, so good."

Natasha almost came undone as soon as he entered her. The chill of his body in comparison to the heat of hers created a palpable steam in the air as their bodies moved together. She gasped as she arched beneath him, pressing her chest flush against his as she shivered around him, hitting her peak.

"Yes! Yes! Loki!" she cried.

Loki swallowed her moans with a passionate kiss as the final shattering release overtook her. Pulsating waves of pleasure flooded through him as he lost control in a jarring, pulsing climax. He had never experienced anything like it. He collapsed on his back, his breathing in a desperate rhythm as he let out a ragged sigh. His arms wrapping around her immediately, pulling her closer as he tried to catch his breath.

"I've never… Eh heh heh heh… you were my first," he jested as his crimson eyes peered down at his wife. He felt very much like a virgin who had just experienced sex for the first time as silly as it was. He had never imagined that he would want to be with a woman in what he supposed was his natural state. Still he hated his Frost Giant heritage and he was certain he always would. "And you will be my only, little spider." He smiled as he let his Aesir form return.

After nursing and spending time with their son in the morning, they left him with the nanny to explore the beach and the tiny island. They ventured through the lush forest before they came upon a lagoon and waterfall. Natasha marveled at it for a few moments before she took a running leap and jumped in.

When she reemerged, she did so with her bikini top in hand and tossed it at her husband before diving back under the water with a mischievous grin.

Loki looked down at the bikini top that he held in his hand, dropping it on the sand as he dove into the water after his wife. Swimming after Natasha through the crystal blue water, he wrapped his hands around her waist as he pulled them back up to the surface. "Eh heh heh heh, I have married a Siren," he teased. "A delicious temptress who has me completely under her thrall." He crushed his lips to hers, the sensation of her naked breasts pressed against his chest sent a jolt of lightning throughout his body.

Natasha chuckled softly against his lips as she wrapped her limbs around him beneath the water, "How is it that I can never get enough of you?"

She chased a trickle of water down his neck with her tongue before returning her lips to his for another kiss, "It's like we're in our very own island paradise."

Loki grinned against her lips, his fingers moving teasingly along the edge of her bathing suit beneath the water. "The entire world is ours, little spider," the young god divulged between kisses. "I am its ruler and you are my Queen."

Natasha smiled and released him to quickly pull off her bathing suit bottoms before tossing them onto a rock before wrapping her limbs back around him. She kissed his lips again, "This is perfect…I love you so much…"

Loki lied along the lounge chair on the deck of their suite as he watched Natasha cradle their son in her arms as she sang him a soft lullaby. It had been two weeks of incredible bliss. The perfect way to begin a marriage, he mused. He had been keeping in touch with his advisers via the small talking contraptions that these humans were so fond of. There had only been a few times when his presence was more severely required and he needed to leave them for a few hours to tend to business. But aside from that their honeymoon had continued uninterrupted.

"Your Majesty, there is a phone call for from the Lieutenant," the Nanny interrupted nervously. He hadn't heard it ring but then he had been too busy taking in the gorgeous sight of his wife and son. Loki moved back into the suite and picked up the phone.

"Yes, what is it?" Loki remarked coolly.

"There was quite a large attack made today against the army base near the edge of New York city." the commander advised. "We were able to subdue it but, your majesty, it is not the first since you have been away. We have had a series of smaller raids throughout the state. The rebels seem to have been banding together more closely. I think they may have a new leader. I think your returned presence would be helpful in keeping the citizens in line."

"We were set to return tomorrow," Loki stated regally. "I somehow doubt one day will make a difference. Make an example of whatever rebels you attained from today's attacks. Being imprisoned will not be their punishment, do you understand? I want everyone to see what happens to those who defy me."

"Yes, your majesty, I understand perfectly," The Lieutenant responded. "I will have them taken care of at once."

Loki slammed the phone onto the counter as he turned to find his wife and son behind him. "I don't want anything to spoil the last day of our honeymoon, my little spider. No kingdom is without its issues." He winked as he moved forward and kissed her softly before brushing his lips against his son's soft black hair. "Is there anything special that you want to do this evening?"

Natasha heard some of the conversation on the phone, but continued tending to her son before Loki slammed the phone down. The loud noise made the infant in her arms squirm and begin to fuss, so she shifted him onto her chest and softly shushed him as she rubbed a comforting hand down his back.

She smiled and sighed, "Maybe just a candlelit dinner on the beach…"

Of course, her wish was his command. That evening, they had a romantic, candlelit dinner on the beach. Afterwards, they danced, twirling together intimately as the sun drifted below the horizon. The next morning, they returned to New York. Natasha, Thomas and their nanny immediately went to sleep in an effort to re acclimate themselves to Eastern Standard time.

For the next several days, she saw very little of her husband, but she knew how demanding ruling an entire world might be, so she didn't complain. She decided to take Thomas out on a walk in the park during the afternoon, so she put him in his carrier, securely strapping him to his chest before venturing outside.

She kissed his soft head as he slumbered against her chest just before she felt the distinct feeling of being followed. Tensing, then relaxing, she walked with a crowd of people to the crowded center of the park, but upon hearing the sound of her name get called by a familiar voice, she slowly turned around.

"Tasha…"

"Clint?" she gasped, one hand protectively placed on her son while the over covered her mouth.

He took a cautious step toward her as his eyes wandered down to the baby in her arms, "I…it's been a while."

"You know me?" she asked, her voice shaky from alarm and curiosity.

Clint nodded, "Whatever fog your husband put us under wore off. The Avengers are back together…and Loki's days are numbered. You can come with me now…and I can guarantee your safety."

"What?! No! Why can't you just leave well enough alone?! Everything is fine! I'm happy."

The archer shook his head, "Come on…what kind of spell does he have you under? I'm still shocked he even got you to agree to have a kid with him."

She wrapped both arms around her son and glared, "Clint, I love him…I love our son. I won't leave him. Ever."

"Natasha—"

"No! Clint. Tell them to stop. Please. Just live. I worked so hard to make sure you guys were ok, and if this goes south, no one will be happy. You can't take my family away from me, do you hear me? I am happy now, and you all have a chance to be happy too! Please."

Loki sat on the throne regally with the Chitauri scepter firmly in his grip, bedecked in his royal attire complete with his golden helmet and flowing green cape. These aliens were a primitive breed and he wanted to ensure that they knew he meant business. Failure to continue to secure the realm for him was not an option. He watched as they exited the hall to complete his orders. He intended to flush out these rebels once and for all.

As the last of the Chitauri leaders exited one of the commanders of his civilian forces entered the Chamber with a file held in his hand.

"We have new intel on the rebels, Your Majesty." The soldier informed him. Loki could tell that he was incredibly nervous about enlightening him about his newest report.

"Do not worry, Lieutenant," The young god drawled wryly. "I will not shoot the messenger this evening. What is it?"

"Our spy's were able to discovery the identity to one of those who are heading this new upsurge in activity," the Lieutenant began cautiously. "It is a former prisoner… Clint Barton."

Loki stood from his throne angrily as he tapped his staff irritably into the floor. Something must have happened to free him from his enchantment. Of course, the first thing the blasted birdman would do would be to return to the city and resume being a thorn in his side. If he had not promised his wife he would make sure that they put an end to him once and for all.

"This changes things," the young god remarked reluctantly. "I need you to make sure that he is brought to me alive and in one piece. I will have to reinstate the spell over him." He stared down at the jewel in his staff as he twirled the scepter slightly between his fingers. "Make sure this is kept between us. I do not want my wife finding out that he is in the city." Loki tilted his head as he gazed at the portrait that he had painted of Natasha and their son. He wasn't going to let the archer interfere in their happiness.

"She already knows, your majesty," the Lieutenant disclosed as he held out the file in his hands. "She was seen meeting with him a little while ago."

Loki laid his scepter along his throne before snatching the file from his hands as he opened it to reveal pictures of them in the park. Natasha, Thomas and Barton. The sight of which made his blood run cold. "These were taken today?" he snapped.

"Yes, they would have attempted to pick him up but when they saw the Queen. They didn't know what to do, Your Majesty," he continued. "They seemed on friendly terms."

"Get the Hel out of my chamber and don't breathe a word of this to anyone," Loki seethed. "And bring me Barton. I don't care how you have to tear up this city to do it."

His head become a flurry of noise as he stared at the picture of the three of them. So much so that he could barely make out one coherent thought. His heartbeat was thundering in his chest and his rage was near to bursting. His hands were shaking as he flipped through the photos again and again. It was her footsteps that he heard first as he raised his dark green eyes toward her.

"It looks like a very lovely reunion," Loki bit off evilly as he threw the photographs at her, the colored images hitting her in the stomach as they dispersed along the floor at her feet.


	13. Chapter 13

Natasha was caught off guard by the file being thrown at her, but as soon as she saw them, her blood ran cold. Dammit…how did he get a hold of them so quick? She was stupid for thinking he would just let her wander out of the walls of the palace with their son without being guarded or watched in some capacity. She was on her way to talk to him about this, but as with everything involving Clint, he was likely too far gone to even listen to reason.

"Loki…before you say anything—" she immediately stopped speaking when he fixed her with an icy glare and took a few intimidating steps toward her.

Natasha took an unconscious step backwards as her breathing quickened. She needed to make sure she didn't back herself into a corner just in case he'd gone far enough to the deep end to physically hurt her. Loki was a Frost Giant. His strength exceeded hers by leaps and bounds. Her best bet was her agility and speed. If need be, she could get away from him.

"It wasn't a reunion. He found me in the park. I had to put Thomas down before I came here. I was coming here to tell you that I saw him and that the enchantment wore off. Loki, I know how you feel about him. I would never seek him out."

"Convenient… but I wouldn't have expected you to say anything else," Loki seethed as he loomed over her. He noticed her take a step backward and that only made him angrier. "My soldiers have been working double time trying to locate the source of my newest problems, imagine their surprise when their efforts brought them to you and your ex-lover." He kicked his boot across one of the myriad of pictures that littered the floor, sending it lofting up in the air for a moment before it settled back on the ground. "You look like you were having a grand old time to me. They said the two of you were having a very friendly conversation. Were you discussing how well your plans were going? "

Before she could register what her body was doing, Natasha shoved him in the chest, hard as she screamed at him, "MY PLANS?! Oh yes! I planned all of this! I planned to fall in love with you, get pregnant, ALMOST DIE in the process and MARRY YOU. My plans are going along perfectly!"

Natasha glared at him, "How DARE you accuse me of betraying you in any capacity after all we've been through! After our son! After all YOU'VE put me through! You practically put me on my death bed, Loki! But I'm still here because I love you and now you're accusing me of this!? How DARE you!"

Loki felt the powerful push of her hands against his chest as she screamed at him angrily. It shocked him for a moment as her words registered in his mind. Her dark blue eyes staring up at him coldly. The young god lifted his helmet from his head as he spun around towards his throne, his long green cape billowing behind him. "I'm… I'm sorry," he entreated solemnly as he laid the gilded covering on the dais. "Sometimes I don't know what's wrong with me." The young god turned back toward her swiftly.

"But why were you with him? Why would you talk to him at all?" Loki probed. His voice filled with anguish. "Why didn't you come straight to me? Was it really so important that you put our son in our rooms first?" He dropped his eyes to the floor as he stared at the pictures scattered about. "You know I thought it that night. I knew deep down that if I let them go that it would be the end of me. But you wanted it and I wanted so badly to make everything up to you. If Barton is free, who knows who else could be?"

Natasha wanted to wrap her arms around him, but neither of them was in the right mental space to embrace. She was still angry and he was obviously in distress.

Natasha closed her eyes, "He was trying to convince me to come with him. Something happened. The enchantment wore off. He wouldn't give me more information with that…I was trying to convince him to stop the attacks and leave everything alone because I am happy. Because I love my husband and my son and I don't want anyone to disturb that."

"He wanted you to leave with him?" Loki rasped as he could feel his anger reigniting. With a flick of his wrist the pictures along the floor flew up into the air and began spinning together like a tiny tornado until suddenly they exploded into a puff of flames, disintegrating into nothingness. "He approached you because he thought you would."

The young god shook his head as he tried to claw his way through the jumble that his mind was becoming. The idea that he thought he had a chance with her made him writhe in jealousy. She had told him herself that she loved him once. He brushed his fingers through his hair as he exhaled audibly. His dark green eyes gazing back at her once more as he strutted closer.

"What do you suggest that I do now, little spider?" Loki remarked coldly. He hated feeling this way. He hated the noise that filled his head and the pressure that pounded against his temples. He knew she loved him. She loved him not the archer. So why did the thought of her speaking to him hurt so much? "How do you want me to handle Barton?"

Natasha pursed her lips and shook her head. She had no answer for him. She wasn't naïve enough to ask him to replace the enchantment on Clint and the rest of the avengers. She knew that that was only a temporary solution, and Loki wanted permanent.

Natasha turned to her husband, "I can't give you my blessing to do anything to him. You know he saved my life once. I am indebted. I wish I weren't. I wish that this would all go away. All I want to do is live happily with you and Thomas."

She paused for several moments as she crossed her arms across her chest. Natasha looked up at her husband, "I don't know what to do here, But I don't ever want you to ever question my love, my devotion OR my loyalty to you ever again…"

"No, I do not question them but neither am I blind to the fact that they are split," Loki stated matter-of-factly as he tried to control his anger. "You can't give me your blessing to do anything to him. So what is it you want me to do? You didn't actually answer my question. Am I to try to cast it again? Would a return to his old quarters be suitable to you or is that too harsh for the man you are so indebted to?" The young god began to pace the room once more. Moving about always soothed him especially when he was feeling trapped as he was now. "What if the enchantment wears off for one of the others? What if they realign themselves? I know you don't want to hear it but I told you before. You can't have it both ways. What if, the Fates forbid, they all come after me will you still sit there on the sidelines and say I wish it would all go away?"

Natasha took a commanding step toward him and raised her hand to point to him, "I am your wife. Your chosen queen. If ANYONE were to threaten my family, I would remind them just how deadly the Black Widow is. I would never sit on the sidelines if you were in danger. Ever."

"That is good to know that you are prepared to fight for me if I'm in danger," Loki drawled as he gazed at her stoically. "But I would personally like to take care of things before it ever gets to that point. My soldiers are scouring the city for him as we speak, little spider. When they bring him before me I am deferring his sentencing to my Queen. You do what you think is best for our family."

Loki walked back towards the dais as he lifted the scepter into his hands. His dark green eyes gazing up at the portrait of his wife and son. "He must have been free from his enchantment for a few weeks at least. His new life was not in this country. The rest of the Avengers need to be checked up on. If Barton's spell could fade then who knows which one of them might be next." He turned back towards his wife as he twirled the staff in his hands. "Perhaps we should pay them a visit together. Who better than you would know if they were faking not remembering your past association. Let us start with the man of Iron his spell was the least intrusive."

"Don't, Loki…don't do this to me. Don't make me do that." Her words were pleading, but her eyes glared at him.

"Why would you force me to do that!?"

"Don't make you do what? Little spider, you need to be more specific or do you object to everything?" Loki remarked flippantly as his dark green eyes narrowed. "If anything you should be pleased that you have free reign to deal with the archer how you see fit. And as for the other Avengers. It is important to find out if they are indeed as harmless as they currently appear to be. You must see the logic in that?" The young god moved forward, his staff firmly in his grip as the blue gem sparkled against the light of the room. "What if they are secretly plotting something? I don't understand your reluctance for either request."

Natasha hated it when he held that staff. It's like it turned him into a tyrant and made him even crueler than he typically had the capacity to be. She narrowed her eyes at him, but said nothing as she turned on her heel and walked out of the room. There was nothing she could say to him when he was like this. She was tired of proving herself to him.

"You can forget about sex for the next few nights. You obviously need a chance to cool off!" she tossed over her shoulder.

Loki stood in the middle of their living room as he waited for her to open the door. He had used magic to send his scepter back to where he normally kept it for safe keeping and then he brought himself to their penthouse. It took him all of two seconds. It would take her at least eight minutes to walk the halls of the palace up to their floor though in her current mood she was probably moving at a record speed. The door flung open and her dark blue eyes focused on him immediately.

"In what world do you think that you can just walk away from me and that would be the end of it?" the young god drawled. "You just spouted off to me a few moments ago about your loyalty and how I should never question it and now what? Are you running back to the sidelines? I need your help to check on your former allies. Why don't you want to help me, little spider? Why do I get the feeling that there is something that you're not telling me?"

"I'm caught between a rock and a hard place. I used to fight with these men, and despite which side they fought on, that doesn't negate the fact that they are good men."

Natasha stomped into the bedroom and began undressing for a shower, "I love you and I have given up the only friends I have to be with you, Loki. In order to keep them safe, I had to vow to never see them again. Now you want me to go interrogate them with you? These are people I care about, and you want me to treat it like some sort of mission."

She finished undressing and walked into the bathroom to turn on the shower before stopping in the doorway, "…and I walked away because I am tired of constantly having to prove my loyalties to you. Me telling you I love you isn't enough. Me having your child isn't enough. Me marrying you isn't enough. Nothing will ever be enough! You keep forcing me to do something else to prove myself! I'm sick of it! You prove yourself to me for once."

Loki used his magic to bring himself inside the room before she could enter the shower, covering her with a robe with another flick of his fingers. Her naked body was far too distracting. If he stared at her much longer he would be on his knees begging for her forgiveness when at the moment he had done nothing wrong.

"You are not being fair to me," the young god insisted. "The only reason that they are even free is because I was trying to prove myself to you. They nearly beat me and if they are somehow plotting a way to come after me again and I don't stop them in time then this time they may succeed. Why would you not want to help me?" He turned away from her as he stared at their reflections in the bathroom mirror.

"I don't understand you. I really don't, little spider." Loki murmured as his dark green eyes gazed at her through the glass. "I could have crushed Barton with my bare hands a long time ago. And believe me when I found out that you had snuck in to see him there was nothing I desired to do more. He is only alive because I love you." He turned back toward her slowly as he closed the distance between them once more. "Is that your final word, little spider? You won't help me check if the spells are working?"

Natasha looked up into his eyes and sighed before slowly dropping her gaze and nodding as she slipped out of her robe her again. She needed to hurry up and shower before their son woke up from his nap.

She nodded, "Alright…I'll help. But don't push me, ok? Don't accuse me of my loyalties lying elsewhere when they are clearly here."

Natasha stepped into the shower and closed the clear door, continuing to talk as she let the water flow through her hair and over her body before she began lathering up, "I just hate the thought that, after all this time and all we've been through, you question me…I hate it. It's hard living in Loki's world. Your way or the highway…all the time. I can't even storm away from you and take time to cool off. God. That is so fucking frustrating."

Loki stood in the middle of the bathroom as he watched the outline of her body in the frosty glass. His lips upturned in a half-smile as he listened to her rant through the sounds of running water as the room began to steam. He waited for the water to shut off before he spoke.

"Natalia, I don't mean to frustrate you. I only wish to keep our family safe and together." The young god entreated as she slid open the door. "You are fairly frustrating yourself, little spider." He gazed upon her as his half-smile threatened to break into an outright grin. While his dark green eyes took in the sight of the drops of water as they glided down her naked flesh.

Natasha dried off as she continued to rant, then tossed the towel up on a hook to lotion herself down, "Oh, I know I'm hard to live with. I will never ever claim that Natasha Romanoff Laufeyson is an easy woman to live with. Of course I couldn't claim that. I'm selfish, aloof, moody…but don't go kidding yourself, mister. You can PMS with the best of 'em, especially if you don't get your way. I just get frustrated because, some of the things that I absolutely love about you are the same things that make me want to strangle you."

Loki took the bottle of lotion out of her hand and began rubbing the cream along her shoulders and down her back. "Do you mind if I help you, little spider?" He inquired in his silky accent. Kneeling down in front of her, he began massaging the lotion down her thighs, working his way towards her ankle before moving to the other leg with slow, sensuous strokes of his hands. "Anywhere else that I can be of service, little spider?" He asked as he gazed up at her with a mischievous glint in his emerald eyes.

Natasha but her lip to stifle a moan before she glared down at his wide, questioning eyes. He knew exactly what he was doing, it appears. She crossed her arms and raised a brow, "You're supposed to be cut off…and I thought you were mad at me…"

Loki flashed her a wicked smile as he ran his hand up her inner thigh. "I can never stay mad at you, my little spider… you know that." He leaned forward and grazed his teeth along her hip before moving his lips along her abdomen as his fingers glided along the apex of her legs. "What about you? Are you still mad at me, little spider?"

Natasha placed her hands on his shoulders to help steady her as her eyes closed and her head dropped back. She sucked in a sharp breath as she bit her bottom lip, "Mmmmm…we'll see…"

Loki replaced his fingers with his tongue as he glided it along her most sensitive spot. She dug her nails into his shoulders while he continued kissing and suckling along her sweet warmth. He relished the sensation as she became even warmer and wetter under his ministrations. The sharp point of her nails digging in harder and the young god loved every minute of it as the sounds of her moans grew louder. With a strangled cry she reached her pinnacle as the young god grinned up at her. "I love watching you come undone, little spider. You're so beautiful."

Natasha panted and smiled dreamily down at him as she floated down from her peak. She stroked the side of his face and walked over to the bathroom counter before bending over slightly and smirking over her shoulder, "C'mere…I think I deserve a little spanking."

A slow, wicked smile spread across his lips as he watched her lean against the counter and wiggle her butt with a come-hither look in her eyes. He strutted forward pressing his body against her back, his fingers stroking along her round bottom before giving her a playful swat as his breath whispered along her ear. "Be careful what you ask for, little spider," he teased as he swatted her butt a second time. He scraped his teeth along her neck before suckling along the soft skin.

Natasha hissed and bit her bottom lip as she favored him with a naughty smirk over her shoulder. When he spanked her a second time, she dragged her tongue over her lips and let out a soft hiss, "Ooooh….yes…more…please. I need you inside of me…"

Loki undid the buckle of his pants, freeing himself and pushed inside of her as she pumped her hips backward. His hand cupping her breast as his other gripped her waist while his teeth continued to nip and graze along her neck and shoulder. They moved together in an unconscious rhythm as they rocked and thrusted to a mind-blowing orgasm. The young god panted against her back as he tried to regain his breath.

"Fighting can have its benefits," Loki gibed as he feathered kisses along her spine. "Little spider."

Natasha had to concentrate to keep herself from collapsing as her knees shook from the after-affects of her second orgasm in less than an hour. She panted heavily and smiled as a breathless laugh escaped her lips, "Oh…yes…yes it does…"

Loki smiled at the sound of her soft laughter. "You have the sweetest giggle, little spider," He lifted her lush red curls and brushed his lips along the nape of her neck before taking a step back and fixing his clothes. With a quick flick of his magic, she stood in front of him in a pretty mint green dress.

"I think we should go to Stark Industries, first," Loki stated as he moved from the bathroom at the sound of Thomas waking up from his nap. "I have him," he directed toward the Nanny as he strutted into the nursery and lifted him from the crib. "And how was your slumber, little prince?" the young god grinned as Natasha entered the room.

"We can tell them that we are looking to have something built for us, some machine of some kind," Loki continued as rubbed his nose playfully against his sons small fingers. "I am certain you will be able to tell if he or Ms. Potts are hiding anything, my little spider."

Natasha nodded slowly as she walked toward him to take their son from his arms, "I should nurse him before we go."

She sat down in the rocking chair and took her time in nursing their son before handing him back to the nanny, "I have pumped milk in the refrigerator. Only give him formula if you run out of that first."

"Yes ma'am", nodded the nanny as she gently rocked the infant in her arms.

Natasha took her husband's arm and sighed, "Alright…let's go."

Within moments, they were inside of Stark Industries. Pepper came out to meet them with a smile, "Hi there…I'm Pepper Potts, Stark Industries CEO. It's an honor to meet you both. Congratulations on the baby. How old is now?"

Natasha watched her eyes and body language carefully for signs of recognition. Loki's enchantment was meant to erase all memories of them from her, and the Avengers memory bank. So far…so good.

"Thank you. He's just over two months old", she said as she shook her hand, then deferred the rest of the talking to her husband so that she could sit back and observe.

Loki and Natasha followed Ms. Potts as she directed them to Tony Stark's office, leaving them there to wait for the billionaire's eminent arrival. They both took a seat in the chairs provided and after a few minutes the man of iron walked in. He was his usual cocky arrogant self but as far as Loki could tell he didn't seem to recognize him. He leaned against his desk as he gazed at the two of them.

"What can I do for you?" Tony inquired. "What brings you to my humble abode?"

"We have an interest in some new high tech equipment that we were told that you carried," Loki replied.

"I don't deal in weapon's anymore." Stark stated blankly as his eyes glanced at the black widow.

"I wasn't referring to a weapon," Loki advised coolly. There was something about the way that he looked at her that the young god didn't like.

"Really, my bad," Tony smirked. "Perhaps you could be more specific? Does your lady friend talk or is she just for show?"

Loki jumped up from his seat as he prepared to wrap his fingers around the smaller man's throat but Natasha was suddenly standing between them with her hands against his chest.

Natasha slowly pushed her husband backwards toward his seat. She'd had the opportunity to observe Stark without interruption until that point, and it was fairly obvious he didn't recognize them. She smiled a little in an effort to dispel the tension, "Um…you'll have to excuse my husband. He's a little…protective….and hot tempered. Meaning, his tolerance for bullshit is very low."

Tony raised his eyebrows and held his hands up in mock surrender, "That's cool. I understand. I was just trying to pay your wife a compliment."

"You know, I think we've taken up enough of your time. We'll have to come back when we can deal with Miss Potts and Miss Potts alone since her professionalism far outweighs yours."

Natasha grabbed her husband's hand and pulled him out of the office.

"You should have let me strangle him," Loki snipped as they walked down the sidewalk. "He had no right to speak of you that way. Do you think he has any memory of before? I don't like the way he looked at you and its obvious he wanted to provoke me. What do you think, little spider? Do we need to worry about him?"

Natasha laughed and rolled her eyes before gesturing behind her, "The way he looked at me was out of attraction. When I first met Tony Stark, I was undercover in the legal department at Stark Industries. Weeks after he initially made Pepper CEO, I was his personal assistant because he thought I was pretty. He's got a thing for pretty faces. They don't call him a playboy for nothing."

"So then you think the enchantment is still working as it should?" Loki contemplated. "I still don't like the remark he made regarding you for that alone he deserves a flogging." His dark green eyes narrowed as he tried to think of his next move. Perhaps it was only Barton whose spell failed. He was the most extensive. There was quite a lot more that he had to make him forget. Plus he was the only one out of all of them who was not in New York City. Perhaps something happened in Ireland that caused his memories to return. "What do you suggest we do next, little spider? Should we personally check the others? or shall I just assign a guard to them perhaps. To keep tabs on them from a distance?"

Natasha nodded slowly, "Yeah. Keep tabs on all of them and you should receive bi-weekly reports on any unusual activities."

She sighed, "I really want to get home to Thomas, but if you won't feel comfortable until we check out the rest of them, I understand."

"No, we can go home, little spider," Loki stated as he pulled her into an embrace. "I trust your instincts. I will have them keeping tabs on them at once. That should be enough of a precaution." He grinned down at her before he claimed her mouth in a passionate kiss while enacting the spell to take them back to the palace. They arrived in the throne room as he broke their kiss slowly and rested his forehead against hers. "Thank you for agreeing to come with me, Natalia. It felt good to be a team." He winked. "Eh heh heh heh, I shall try not to PMS on you so much in the future."

The doors of the throne room opened as two soldiers walked in the room bringing the archer with them. His hands were cuffed behind his back and a grim expression adorned his face.


	14. Chapter 14

Natasha's heart sank as her eyes met Clint's. Out of all of the things she'd done in her life, this would be the absolute hardest. She looked to Loki, but his expression had turned to stone once the archer entered. Of course he'd be stoic now. For whatever reason, he saw Clint as his arch nemesis, all because he had been in love with Natasha…

She knew she'd have to make her decision. Loki would hold her to it, and if she didn't, he'd probably kill Barton due to her indecisiveness. That's what he really wanted.

"Leave us" she murmured toward the guards, who glanced up at Loki for approval. That angered her, "When your queen gives an order, you should be just as quick to follow it! Now move!"

The men hustled from the room, leaving them alone with their prisoner.

"Clint…I have to be the one to hand down your punishment."

The archer looked at her for a moment before turning his glare on Loki, "You stop to think about how that would make her feel? Do you ever think she might wanna to grab a beer with her friends or shoot the breeze with someone other than you? You may love her…but it's a sick, selfish love. You love her for yourself. Not for HER. I doubt you've made a decision in regards to her where you thought about her feelings first."

"Clint, please—"

"I want you to have me executed, Tasha…I want you to see the type of man your husband is and the type of woman he's turning you into. Kill the man who saved your life. Go ahead."

Natasha shook her head and glanced between Loki and Clint as her eyes grew wet. She shook her head slowly, her pleading eyes turning to her husband.

"You're taunting her to kill you?" Loki remarked coldly. "And is that evidence of your concern for her feelings? Is this the proof of what a better man you are than me? Taunt her to execute you but don't forget to pull out the 'you're indebted to me card'. What's the point of your death if she isn't riddled with guilt, right? Because your feelings for her are so unselfish."

The young god stepped forward as he loomed over the archer. He hated him but he would rather look at him than the mournful stare of his wife. He couldn't win with her where this man was concerned. He asked her what she wanted him to do and she wouldn't answer him. He gave her the ability to deal with her friend in any way that she wanted and still she looked at him as if he were a… monster.

"You question my love for her?" Loki seethed. "Do you think I give a damn what you think?" The trickster whipped around so that his dark emerald eyes were peering into his wife's sorrowful stare.

"'Clint please' is that all you can say?" he murmured softly. "The man mocks my love for you and that's all you can muster in my defense? Perhaps you believe there is truth to his words, is that it?" Did she really think he loved her so little or was she just ashamed to admit in front of the archer that she loved him at all? Either possibility cut him to the quick.

"You are the only person whose opinion matters to me, little spider." Loki stated honestly as he tried to control the emotion in his voice. "I haven't asked you to do anything except to decide what is best for our family. Do you want to hand the decision back to me? Because I can tell you right now that I'm no longer objective enough to make it. If I lock him away in the dungeon, it will hurt you. If I order his execution it will hurt you. I could use the scepter on him again but I have no doubt that seeing him like that would hurt you too. And I don't want to cause you pain. I can't bear it. The spell doesn't work on him. He is never going to leave us alone. Natalia, I don't know what you want me to do."

Natasha shook her head, "He knows I love you, Loki. Clint, stop! I told you that I love him. Loki is my family!"

"He's incapable of real love, Tasha! How can you not see that!?" he yelled.

"STOP!" she screamed as she grabbed a hold of her head, causing him to fall silent and sorrowfully shake his head. When she looked back up at Clint, her eyes were glistening with tears. She took a few moments to collect herself and reinstate her calm demeanor, but the tears in her eyes remained, "Clint, you saved my life once. I will never forget that. Which is why I will never allow you to be executed…you will live, but for your actions, a spell will be cast on you. A permanent one. All knowledge of this life will be eliminated…and you will be remade. You will live happily….but it will be far away from here. You may not know it, but you will remain under the watchful eye of guards…because if the enchantment ever wears off, it will be reinstated. If you resist, I won't be there to stop your execution."

"Tasha…"

Natasha took a step back and glanced up at Loki before lowering her eyes and rushing from the room, "I need to tend to my son."

"So what did you do to turn her from everything she ever believed? A spell? that little blue rock of yours?" Clint taunted, his burnt almond eyes staring up at him defiantly. "Maybe it's just Stockholm syndrome. You know, keep her in a glass cage for months then offer her a little cookie. A bigger room, a few amenities. When a girl's that desperate I guess even a monster like you could start to look good."

Loki stared solemnly at the door where his wife had just exited as the words of the archer fell over him. He tilted his head toward him, the slightest of smirks forming on his lips as he stepped closer. With one swift motion he punched him in the gut causing the archer to double over as Loki grabbed him by the hair and pulled him back up. His dark green eyes filled with malice.

"It's almost a shame that I'll have to take your memories," Loki rasped evilly. "I can only imagine the malcontent that filled you when you awoke from your little dream to find her as my wife and with my child. What a delicious torment must have flowed through you. Well, I will let you savor it for a little bit longer before I return you to your more tranquil state."

Loki called for the guards to return him to his cell. He needed a little time to figure out precisely the best way to eliminate the man's memories for good. He returned to their penthouse to find her cradling their son in the rocking chair of his nursery.

"Are you alright, little spider?" Loki asked softly as he moved further into the room.

Natasha was softly rubbing her son's back after a feeding, hoping to solicit a burp from his taunt tummy as she slowly rocked back and forth. She sighed softly and shook her head, "I'll be fine. Let's not talk about it anymore."

She finally heard Thomas burp and smiled, wiping up the dribble of spit up on his chin before standing up and walking him to where Loki stood, then handed him off and gently placing the burp cloth on his shoulder, "I'm going to fix dinner. Try to keep him awake for the next hour or so that he goes to bed at a decent hour tonight."

Natasha wandered into the kitchen and looked in their refrigerator. She didn't see anything she wanted, so she picked up a takeout menu, "Hon, do you have a preference for dinner tonight?"

"No, not really," Loki remarked as he watched his wife move about the kitchen as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened today at all. Her calm, cool mask was firmly in place and he didn't care for it at all. The young god turned his attention to his son in his arms. "So what do you want to do this evening, little prince? Would you like to exercise?" he grinned as he moved toward the living room to the play mat that was set up along the floor. He laid him down gently on his stomach as he watched him attempt to push up with his hands before he rolled over onto his back and swatted at the plush toys that were dangling overhead. Loki laid down on the floor at his side, picking up a small rattle and shaking it over him. Thomas squealed happily as he snatched the toy from his hand. "Already so independent," he jested, "You like making the noise yourself, Eh heh heh heh, well you are very good at it… yes you are." The young god cooed as he continued to play with his son.

Natasha ordered Chinese food and had one of their guards pick it up for them while she sat down at the kitchen table, watching Loki play with their son. He was a wonderful father…and it was times like these when she was immensely grateful for that fact, because trials like the ones they face with her ex-teammate were enough to end a lesser couple.

She saw a look in her husband's eyes when he glanced over at her, and she sighed, "You want me to show my feelings, but that won't do anything but make our evening unpleasant. Let me keep this mask on…it's better this way."

"No, it isn't better. It is the complete opposite of better," Loki remarked as he returned his attentions to his son. "Do you honestly believe this evening isn't unpleasant? It is just a different type of disharmony but no less painful then whatever you are hiding inside of your cool exterior."

Natasha lowered her eyes to the kitchen table and sighed, "What will you have me do? You want me to be upset? You want me to show my anger? Any type of emotion I show in regards to Clint draws your ire. I can't win in this situation so I feel it's best to show nothing…"

"Anger? Yes, most definitely," Loki remarked flippantly as he sat up along the floor while he let his son continue to knock his rattle against the young god's outstretched hand. "I would love to see it. I would love to know who it is directed at."

Natasha dropped her head against the table, "I think you like fighting with me. You like the drama. I know exactly why too." She lifted her head up and chuckled softly, "It's the makeup sex. Admit it. The food tastes better when you've thrown some extra logs on the fire…"

"You're making a joke?" Loki puzzled as his eyebrow's furrowed in confusion. "Are you angry at me or not? I can't read you at all. Can you give me an honest emotion please?"

"Trust me; I am just as confused as you are. So you want an honest emotion? Confusion. I don't know how to feel here. On one hand, I'm happy that my family is safe. On another hand I'm sad that I just sentenced my oldest friend to a life of confusion. And then on another hand, I am frustrated with you because you keep forcing me to express emotions you don't want to be bothered with in the first place. You want me to feel the way you want me to feel. After our time living together, I found that if I feel any emotion that is expressly different than what you want me to feel then I do better just remaining quiet."

"That I don't want to be bothered with… What in the name of Hel are you talking about?" Loki snipped. "If that is what you truly believe than perhaps you should rethink your choices." He gazed down at his son whose eye lids were beginning to get heavy as his tiny swings grew less and less forceful. Loki picked him up and stood from the floor. "Thomas is ready for bed. I'll put him down." He stated coolly as he moved swiftly into the nursery.

Natasha huffed as she heard a knock on the door. She set the Chinese food she ordered on the kitchen table before setting out some plates and spooning out some food onto each of them. She sat down just as he emerged from the nursery, "Come on, Loki. Don't make me think I'm crazy. When I react to things in a way you don't approve of…you do get upset. I am NOT making this up…"

"You think I don't care how you feel? You really believe that?" Loki gaped as he moved into the kitchen. "That I only care if you agree with me whether you're hurting or not? So what is your plan for your life? Spend your days pretending you have no emotions and placating me with sex. Why do you even want to bother?" The words of the archer filled his head as his irritation began to rise.

_"it's a sick, selfish love. You love her for yourself. Not for HER."_

_"Keep her in a glass cage for months then offer her a little cookie. A bigger room, a few amenities. When a girl's that desperate I guess even a monster like you could start to look good."_

"You know what I think I need some fresh air," Loki exhaled as he tried to control his temper. The noise in his head was getting deafening. "I have to think of a way to make that spell stick and I suppose I should enact it this evening if possible."

Natasha sighed and watched him leave. She ate her dinner, then had a nice, long workout before drawing herself a bath and climbing in. What was she supposed to say to him when he got like this?

Perhaps, when Barton was removed from their lives for good, they would stop having this issue. Maybe they would stop coming to blows over concerning things of this sort. Natasha leaned her head back against the bath tub and read a magazine, turning on the music in the ambient stereo system.

Loki sat in his office as he twirled the Chitauri scepter along his lap. It had taken him most of the evening to complete the spell on Barton. In the end, it seemed to have worked. He sent him off with a guard to escort him to the plane that would take him to his new home. He was exhausted as he leaned back along the chair. It was nearly two in the morning yet he had no desire to move from this spot.

He couldn't get over how close the remarks between the archer and his wife had been. Why was she even with him if she believed that he cared so little for her? Was Barton right? Was she just conditioned to want him because of her imprisonment? If not for that, she never would have chosen him. He swiveled in his chair so that he could gaze out the view from his window. What had love ever done for him but make him weak and bring him pain, he thought dejectedly as he continued to stare into the moonlit sky.

"Get out of your head, Loki. You start thinking crazy thoughts when you spend too much time in there", said Natasha from the doorway. To this day, she was the only person who could ever successfully sneak up on Loki. She'd been trying to sleep, but when she realized that it was so late, she set off to find her husband.

She'd wrapped herself in a robe and made her way to his office. He fixed her with a cold, stoic stare as she moved to his desk to sit on its surface, "You wanna tell me the thoughts that are going through your mind that are making you look at me like that?"

Natasha crossed her arms and sighed at his silence, "You think the only reason I'm with you is because of you imprisoned me…I'd hit you upside the head if I knew it would do anything."

Loki stood up and moved away from the desk as he continued to hold the staff in his grip. The blue gem was glowing brightly in the dimly lit room. He shouldn't be surprised that he hadn't noticed her enter his office. She always had a way of sneaking up on him. It was just another example of his weakness around her.

"He is in Australia," the young god stated matter-of-factly as he stared down at the jewel in his scepter. He grazed a finger along the glittering orb. His face without emotion as he stood there regally. "The enchantment was successful. He has a new life. Perhaps you would like one as well."

Natasha crossed her arms and stood, following him as he moved about the room. She narrowed her eyes at him, "Stop it. Just STOP IT. There you go again! Good GOD, Loki. I am SICK of it. Barton has most of the same training I do. Whatever he said was just him trying to get into your head, and apparently, it worked! You think I don't love you? You think I don't know that you love me? Fine. Fine. Go ahead. Brainwash me. Give me a new life. Figure out how you're going to explain to your son where his mother went when he's old enough to realize I'm gone. GOD! The fact that you have issues with allowing me to express the good, the bad and the ugly of my emotions is an issue A LOT of couples in Midgard have, Loki. No man wants to see his wife angry, and all of you males are too stupid to recognize that we have the right to exercise these unpleasant emotions we see fit. That issue and that argument is the same one happening across millions of households in this realm! You've said it before and you'll say it again, so I'll reiterate. YOU ARE SELFISH! I fucking love you, but you're selfish. This is the Loki show! You know it is. You've admitted your selfishness. Do I think that you love me any less? No! Does it make me love you any less? No! But goddammit if I don't wish I could smack you upside the fucking head sometimes…NOW being one of those times!"

"I wasn't talking about brainwashing you," Loki remarked coldly. "Why would I need to when apparently you've already done a fine job of it yourself. Yes, I'm selfish and stubborn and jealous and sometimes I swear I think there's a madness inside of my head, determined to eat me alive." The young god continued to pace his office as he held his staff tightly in his grip. "Your little birdman was right. You were locked up with a bleak future ahead of you. You saw an opportunity for freedom for you and your friends and you took it. I thought that when I offered you an apartment of your own and privileges without ever having to see me… I thought I gave you a choice to truly choose me but it was still a prison." He turned his gaze back toward the skyline as he shook his head dejectedly. "Even now."

Natasha walked over to him an stared into his eyes, "Loki…put the staff down…and listen to me."

"What for? What are you going to tell me?" Loki rasped as his dark emerald eyes gazed at her coldly. "That I'm not your captor. I mean… because once you gave birth to my son and agreed to spend the rest of your days with me. Well, then I gave you your freedom. Eh heh heh heh." Loki began to laugh but there was no mirth in it. It was hollow and empty. Much like the way he felt right now. "You're not a prisoner anymore. It is no wonder that you love me."

Natasha stared at him incredulously and took a step back as tears came to her eyes, "Listen to yourself! Why are you speaking to me this way?! What is WRONG with you?"

"What's wrong with me?" Loki scoffed. "What isn't wrong with me that would be a shorter list." The young god took a step away from her and then stopped. His anger shooting up suddenly at the thought that she was still upset with him. "I'm trying to do right by you, to give you your freedom. I'm trying to think of you over myself. But that's still not good enough is it?" He slammed his staff down into his desk before he tossed it across the room in a fury of anger. It crashed into the wall making a large clattering noise as it fell along the tiles. "I can't even do that right."

Natasha jumped slightly once he threw the staff across the room. She shook out of a combination of anger and fear, "I'm here because I love you! If I wanted my freedom, I could have taken it a million times over! I could have given those idiot guards the slip a million times, but I fell in love with you. I'm here because there is no place in the world I'd rather be! I'm here because there is no one I could imagine loving anymore. And it's not because of you setting me free or Stockholm Syndrome! It's because of Twizzlers. It's because of Scrabble and Monopoly and late night baths and snarky commentary while watching cheesy movies and…our son…"

She turned away from him and wiped the tears that had formed in her eyes, "I wouldn't think you'd have to dig so deep to remember everything we've shared. Has any look I've ever given you been a lie? When I wake up and you're playing in my hair and kissing me…don't you see the look in my eyes?"

"I know you love me but you shouldn't," Loki whispered. "Your friend was right. Why should you have to change for me? Even when I'm trying to be unselfish it's for selfish reasons, eh heh heh heh. I want nothing more than to make you happy. I want to make you as happy as you've made me. I want you to know that I love you." The young god strutted forward as he stared at the scepter along the floor. He waved a hand over it as he sent it away magically to where he kept it when it wasn't needed. "I want to prove to you that I love you, Natalia. What better way than to let you go? Isn't that what they always say?"

Natasha closed her eyes, "Loki….I've told you a million and one times where I want to be. There is no 'letting me go'. If I wanted to go, I'd be gone by now. But…if you WANT me gone…that's another thing entirely. If you feel guilt, or sadness over your perceptions of my life with you, and you need me gone so that you can fester and stew over being made weak by your love for me…I can take Thomas…and we can go."

"I would never let you leave me," Loki stated as he turned around to face her. "I could never go through with it. Just those few words from your lips and that selfish part of me just comes rising up to the surface. I can't stand the thought of being without you." The young god reached forward and took a loose curl of her hair between his fingers. "I could never let you go. I'm sorry, little spider."

"Then don't! And stop trying to push me away every chance you get! I keep telling you how much I love you and need you, but someone…anyone says something, and it triggers something within you…and god forbid you think of our relationship while you're holding that staff…"

"I don't want you to be afraid to upset me," Loki divulged as he continued to twirl her hair languidly through his fingers. He could feel his entire body begin to settle and all the noise in his head fading away. "I know I'm… difficult at times. But I do want to know how you're feeling. Your feelings do matter to me. I want to know you're happy and if you're not than I want you to promise to tell me that, too. So I can fix it or I don't know… make it up to you somehow. You mean everything to me, my little spider. You and our son."

Natasha slowly wrapped her arms around her husband and kissed him before laying her head on his chest, "come on…lets go lay down…"

As they made their way to their apartment, Natasha couldn't help but realize how much more volatile he was when he held that staff. His entire outlook on their relationship and their love changed…

Loki moved through the penthouse toward their bedroom. It had to be near three in the morning by now. With a quick pull of his magic he changed himself into the pajama pants that he normally wore though he knew that falling asleep at this point was very doubtful. The young god looked up at his wife as he sat on the edge of their bed.

"I should have come up to you the moment that I was done with the enchantment, little spider," Loki divulged. "Sitting alone with my thoughts is never a good thing for me."

Natasha sighed, "Loki…I think the staff might have a bit to do with how you often run away with some of your more negative thoughts concerning our relationship…"

She slowly slipped out of her robe and moved to straddle his lap as she placed her hands on his shoulders before leaning down to place a soft, quick kiss on his lips.

"It just a scepter," Loki contemplated as he placed his hands along her thighs and moved them slowly to her hips. "I only pull power from it when I wield it. Eh heh heh heh, I'm just as crazy when it's not in my hands." He moved his lips along the pulse point of her throat, suckling along the skin as he let the incredible sensation of her being on his lap. "You taste divine, little spider."

Natasha slowly shook her head, "Do you notice a change in your feelings? In the noise inside of your head when you're holding it? Does it feel like your world is a little less chaotic when it's not around?"

"I notice a difference when you're with me," Loki mused as he ran his hands up her back as he moved his lips to the soft spot behind her ear. "When you're close to me, all the craziness goes away. Even if it's just to touch these glorious red curls of yours." He fell backwards on the bed bringing her with him as he pulled her in for a passionate kiss.

Natasha kissed him back hungrily as she reached down to push his pajama pants down off of his hips. She settled down onto his member, slipping him deep inside of her before she sat up and placed her hands on his chest to steady herself.

"The noise doesn't stop for me unless you're inside of me…just like this…"

Loki groaned in blissful agony as his hands gripped her hips. His dark green eyes staring at her lustfully as he watched her movements. "Valhalla.. you feel so good… so good… and you're all mine."

Natasha rolled her hips in slow, sensuous circles at first, before she slowly began increasing the speed of her movements until they both reached their peak, crying out together as their bodies were overtaken by the blinding pleasure of a mutual orgasm.

She collapsed onto his chest as she whispered breathlessly, "Loki…don't you dare ever try to make me leave you…"

"Never, little spider, I will never let you leave me," Loki promised breathlessly. He couldn't believe he had ever entertained the idea even for a second. "You are mine.. my wife… you belong to me.. every little bit of you is all mine… and I'm yours, Natalia." He wrapped his arms around her tighter as he brushed his lips along her forehead. Relishing the feel of her long strawberry curls falling along his chest. "Forgive me my stupidity, my little spider. I would be lost without you."

Natasha lifted her head up to rest her chin against his chest as she stared into his eyes, "I love you because of what we share…don't ever question that. Please…"

She kissed him softly before she rolled off of him and curled into his side, falling asleep.

Loki sat on his throne in his full royal armor as he held the chitauri scepter in his grip. He hated dealing with these primitive creatures but it was necessary to keep his realm secure. He watched as they exited the chamber. His dark green eyes drifting to the staff's point and the mystical blue gem that resided there. A gift from his associates. It held an awful lot of power for such a small piece and it kept the Chitauri in line.

His thoughts began to drift to the Avengers. The spy's that kept tabs on them had not reported anything out of the ordinary. Still he couldn't help but worry. They were all his enemies and they were roaming around the city free. He was so consumed by his thoughts that he didn't even notice when his wife entered the room.

Natasha approached slowly…cautiously. She hated when he held that scepter. She still believed it turned him into a tyrant, despite his claims to the contrary.

When he looked to her, she smiled expectantly and raised a brow, "I was wondering if you might join Thomas and I for a walk…"

"A walk?" Loki remarked blankly as he tried to clear his thoughts. "a walk… yes… certainly, little spider, that would be lovely. Around the park?"

Natasha nodded, "Yeah. Maybe lunch? The nanny is getting him changed and will meet us in the lobby. Maybe you want to change an put the scepter…somewhere else."

"You mean I shouldn't walk through the park dressed like this?" he jested as he rested the scepter against the dais. He moved closer to her grabbing the edge of his green cape and extending his arm upward as if to show it off. "In all my royal grandeur?" Loki noted how her eyes darted back to the staff where it lied on against his throne. He leaned forward kissing her sweetly as he smiled. "Are you still worried about that scepter?"

Natasha laughed a little and shook her head, "Well, if your goal is to call attention to yourself, this is a great way to do it."

When he asked her the question, she fell silent. "Yes", she answered truthfully. "It just makes me nervous that's all."

With a flick of his wrist the scepter dispersed and his clothes were changed to a pair of jeans and soft green t-shirt. "How's that little spider? Your wish is my command, my Queen." Loki enclosed her face in his hands as he kissed her softly. "It is necessary for me to use it but I will try and call it forth as little as possible. Does that please you, my little spider?"

Natasha peppered his lips with multiple kisses before nodding, "Absolutely."

They met the nanny in the lobby and placed Thomas in his stroller before they ventured out to the park. Natasha glanced up, noticing photographers following them, "They treat us like celebrities….this is weird. I don't want them to take pictures of Tommy…"

"Yes, this is a very strange Midgardian custom, I've never understood it," Loki remarked before he stopped and turned around towards the photographers. "Enough," he ordered. "The next one of you to snap a picture will be spending the evening in a cell. Get out of here."

The shutterbugs scattered, much to Natasha's relief. She reached down to adjust the blanket around their sleeping son and glanced up at her husband with a smile, "You're such a protective daddy. I love it…"

"I'm protective of both of you," Loki grinned. "I love being a father and I love being your husband." Natasha gazed up at him with a bright smile. He could never get over just how beautiful she was. She halted suddenly as someone accidentally bumped into their son's carriage.

"Watch where you're going," Loki bit off angrily before he froze as he gazed at the man in front of them.

"I'm so sorry, sir.. mam," Steve Rogers apologized. "I was running a little late but that's no excuse."

Natasha's mouth dropped open, and she was rooted in her spot until she heard her son's soft whines. She moved to pick up the infant and softly shush him.

"Oh, is he alright? I'm so sorry. Really, I am. Is there anything I can do?" asked the former Captain America worriedly.

Natasha shook her head, "He's fine. Just a little ticked about being woken up…um…"

She looked to Loki, obviously at a complete loss for what to say or do in this situation. Steve seemed oblivious as to who they were, which was a relief for her.

"We're all fine. You were late, you don't want to be any later," Loki snipped. "We accept you're apology. Go ahead and go."

"Oh… yeah, right. Thanks. Again, I'm really, really sorry." Steve entreated as he started to walk away. "I hope the little guy falls back to sleep for you, mam."

Loki stood at the sidewalk as he watched the former captain run across the street on his way to wherever he was headed. He supposed he shouldn't think much of it. After all, they were all in the city except for Barton. It made sense that they might run into each other once in a while, he guessed. "That was weird," he said finally. "I was just thinking about them this morning."

"You conjured him up, then…that was REALLY weird…" she murmured, obviously a little shaken up by that run in. "He didn't seem to know us, though…and if there's any one of the Avengers who literally can't lie, it's Steve Rogers."

"Yes, I agree, little spider," Loki confirmed as his dark green eyes continued to stare out into the distance though Rogers was long gone. "I don't think he knew us. Let's not let it spoil our walk or our lunch."

Natasha nodded in agreement, "Love, would you mind pushing his stroller so I can carry him? He's awake now and not super happy. He needs a nursing."

She discreetly attached her son to her breast as they walked to the restaurant. When they sat down at a booth, she smiled up at her husband, "What if Thomas doesn't want the throne? He's your only heir…I feel like a bad queen for only being able to give you one child."

"Sometimes when I look at the two of you," Loki smiled wistfully as he reached out and took her hand, moving his thumb back and forth along her wedding rings. "I can't even remember why I wanted it in the first place. I enjoy the power don't get me wrong but the two of you are so much more important. He can do whatever he wants. I hope I can be a good father to him."

Natasha smiled at her husband, "You are already an amazing father to our son. I'm fairly sure that when he's done breast feeding, you'll be his favorite person in the world."

Weeks went by and there were no further run ins with the Avengers. Nothing out of the ordinary to report from those who were keeping tabs on them and it seemed like everything in Loki's world was perfect. Then a bomb of some kind was set off inside one of his encampments around the city that housed a battalion of Chitauri soldiers. Several high ranked commanders of their army died in the explosion. Needless, to say they were unhappy and wanted retribution. They wanted to swarm the city for the culprits.

It had taken him all morning to calm the savage beasts. He would find out who was responsible but he could not have his entire kingdom turned upside down in the process. He began to wonder once more if the Avengers weren't back to their old tricks and just pretending to not remember.

Loki stared out the window of his office, his scepter in hand as he fumed. He wasn't going to let anyone take away what was his. Especially not those damned Avengers. How could he be certain that his enchantment on them was truly working. He turned swiftly as he pressed the intercom on his desk. "I want a rundown of where every single avenger was last night and what they were doing even that Ms. Potts. And I want it immediately," he barked.


	15. Chapter 15

Even without spending a bulk of her time in his offices, or in the throne room, Natasha was able to stay abreast of the attacks. Of course, Loki's mood soured due to the stress he was facing, so she tried to make sure that things in their home ran as smoothly as possible. She'd even make frequent trips to his office to offer him her own special brand of "comfort", which she was certain he enjoyed.

She entered his office, closing the door behind her and locking it, "Hello, my love…I wanted to come check on you…"

"They attacked again," Loki remarked coldly as he watched her enter the room. "I think your friends are just being very careful not to alert anyone of their activities. These things are sporadic but far too controlled. Whoever is behind it knows what they are doing. They've had practice." His grip on his staff tightening in his annoyance. "It's not just some little army flunky. They are playing me I know it."

Natasha began fiddling with her hands, similar to the way he did when he was nervous. She bit her lip and shook her head, "Loki…there are more people out there who want to see you usurped than the Avengers. To overlook that and concentrate solely on people who aren't the real threat could be your greatest downfall."

She moved closer toward him, "Come here…put down the staff and put your arms around me. You said it yourself. You think clearer when I'm in your arms…"

She didn't want him to go after them because they are her friends, he thought to himself. Even now they are still so important to her. Loki furrowed his brow as he watched her walk toward him. "You are so intent on protecting them," he frothed as his grip on the staff tightened. "Perhaps you want me back in pr…." The young god stopped in mid-sentence as he shook his head. He had begun to feel an ache in his temples. The voices seemed to be shouting in his mind. Her dark blue eyes were looking up at him nervously. Was she afraid of him? The thought made him angrier. No. No. He had no reason to be mad at her. He laid the staff on his desk as he pulled her into an embrace. "Forgive me.. I didn't mean that, little spider," he entreated. "It's been a bad morning. The Chitauri are very unhappy. I don't need them bringing Thanos down on my head."

Natasha hugged him tight as she glared at the staff. She shook her head, "Loki…that thing makes you say those things…the same things we argue about for no good reason at all. Please…you have to see that."

She stared up at him with pleading eyes, "When you're holding it, there's a different look about you…a different look in your eyes. It's like it's trying to convince you to push me away or that I'm your enemy. The only time you've ever seriously considered making me leave you is when that thing is in your hands…"

Loki wrapped his fingers along a red tendril of her hair as he began to play with it lightly. "It isn't the staff… I told you I just had to deal with some very angry creatures. And sometimes my mind it's just crowded… but that's just me. I have always been that way, little spider. I don't mean to take it out on you, truly." His dark green eyes gazed down at her lovingly as he pulled her closer and captured her lips in a kiss. "Besides, I need the scepter to keep the armies in line. I wouldn't have succeeded without it."

Natasha kissed him back and slowly nodded, not believing that he was that person without the staff. She knew the difference between scepter-wielding Loki and normal Loki…she knew it well.

"I'm having lunch delivered here so you and I can eat alone. I figured you wouldn't be able to get away from your office because so much is going on…"

She walked over to his desk and sat down on its surface as she stared out the window in deep thought, "It could be that other governments have banded together in an attempt to recapture the earth…it's not so farfetched, you know…"

"You know I like this, my little spider," Loki smiled as he positioned himself between her legs, his hands resting along her thighs. "My Queen and my adviser… we are truly a team… I value your opinion very much, Natalia. And I am grateful for your help."

Natasha allowed her hands to roam up his chest and slowly rested them on his face as she gently pulled him down to claim his lips in a loving kiss. She smiled up at him, "I love you…so much. I want to help in any way I can. I know being your queen isn't just about sitting beside you and giving you the best sex of your existence.

She laughed softly and winked as she nibbled on his neck.

"Eh heh heh heh, that is certainly true, little spider," Loki grinned as he sighed at the delightful feeling of her lips and teeth moving along his throat. "Tell me… how would you proceed? How should I flush them out?" He began to unbutton her top slowly as he moved his lips across her skin, pulling the shirt down her shoulders. "What would you do, my little spider?"

Natasha's head drifted back as she closed her eyes and smiled at the feel of his lips on her skin as he pulled her shirt from her body.

"Hmmm…perhaps you should put up a rouse…set up a fake base camp. Make it look like there's a lot of activity near them…make it look very important so they'll attack it."

"Brilliant," Loki grinned as he hooked his finger in the strap of her bra and pulled it down over her shoulder. "You are very wise, my little spider. Yes… that is the perfect plan… I will put it into action as soon as we are finished… with our lunch." he winked as he kissed her lustfully. He was amazed at how quickly his entire outlook had changed. Everything seemed hopeful and perfect as long as she was near him.

Natasha moaned in approval as he pulled her bra down to reveal her breasts. They ravaged each other, right there on top of his desk. Afterwards, Natasha walked behind his desk, still naked, and picked up his helmet.

She smirked at him before slipping it on and draping his cape over her shoulders, "Do I look like I could rule the world?"

"Eh heh heh heh," Loki grinned widely as he watched her lustfully. "Yes, you do. You know I've always fantasized about how you would look dressed like that, Natalia." He knelt down in front of her with an impish smile as his dark green eyes took in the sight of her before him. "Your majesty, I am yours to command."

Natasha waved her arm grandly, "My first command, most loyal subject…is to drive me to at least three more orgasms before the sun of the morrow rises…."

She tried to keep her face stern, but she couldn't stop herself from giggling.

Loki gazed up from his place on the ground before her as he grinned widely. "It would be my pleasure, Your Majesty, I want nothing more than to serve you." He stood as his hands ghosted along her legs. "If you would just lay back, Your Majesty," he winked as his fingers teased her inner thigh. "I could begin at once, if it pleases, Your Majesty."

Natasha slowly sat up on the desk and spread her legs as she snapped her fingers and pointed to the floor before her, "Kneel before me…and bring me pleasure…"

Loki grinned wider as she snapped her fingers and he immediately knelt back down onto the ground. "Yes, Your Majesty," he breathed between her legs as he began licking and suckling her bare flesh while he gazed up at her. Her head thrown back and her mouth opened in pleasure, the green cap falling about her shoulders. The sight of her moaning in pleasure while she was wearing his helmet was breathtakingly delicious.

Natasha's body moaned as she writhed in pleasure against the desk. After a few moments, she panted and moved a hand through his hair, "Up…get inside of me…now"

"Yes, Your majesty," He grinned as he stood up slowly enjoying the gorgeous sight before him. They came together explosively in a perfect rhythm. Loki kissed her softly as he gazed into her dark blue eyes. "I love being ruled by you, My Queen."

The sparkle from the blue gem caught his eye as he turned his attention to the floor. The scepter must have fallen off the desk during their lovemaking. "Eh heh heh heh, I think my kingdom could have fallen down around us and I wouldn't have any clue, my little spider," he chuckled as he leaned down to pick it up. "I'm simply enraptured by you , my Queen."

Natasha frowned once he picked up the staff and slowly got redressed, laying out his cape and helmet carefully.

"I'm going to go check on Thomas. I love you…" she said as she kissed his lips and slipped from his office.

Loki opened the door to their penthouse. The front rooms were empty so he headed toward the nursery where he found his wife gazing at their son who was fast asleep in his crib.

"How's our little prince?" the young god mused as he moved closer. "I've chosen the location for my new base. I think your idea is going to do the trick, little spider. It will be such a load off my shoulders once this has been taken care of." He took a peek inside the crib and grinned. "He's getting so big."

Natasha nodded with a soft smile, "He is growing so fast…so beautiful."

She led her husband out of the nursery and kissed his lips as they sat on the couch, "Good. I hate seeing you stressed and worried…"

"You know, Your Majesty," Loki winked as he pulled her closer. "I was commanded to give you three pleasurable moments and I don't believe that I've truly fulfilled my orders yet." He leaned forward so that their lips were barely a hairsbreadth from one another as he whispered. "I must obey my Queen." Before capturing her lips softly as his arms tightened around her.

Natasha moaned in delight as she playfully jumped into his arms and wrapped her legs around his middle, "Such a loyal and obedient subject. You shall be handsomely rewarded for your deeds, sir…"

Loki grinned widely as ran his hands along her thighs and glided his tongue teasingly along her neck. "Pleasing my Queen is my reward," he breathed in his silky accent. An abrupt knocking on their door interrupted the moment. "I'm sorry, little spider."

He strutted toward the entrance to find one of his commanders on the other side.

"What is it?" Loki snipped.

"I'm sorry to disturb you so late, Your Majesty," the Lieutenant entreated. "But there is an emissary from Thanos who insists they see you now."

Loki didn't like the sound of that at all. The last thing he needed was to have to deal with the Titan. At least he hadn't come here himself, he contemplated as he nodded to the Lieutenant that he would follow after him.

"This shouldn't take long, little spider." Loki ensured before he closed the door behind him.

Natasha pouted playfully, then waved to him as he left. While he was gone, Thomas woke up needing a feeding and a changing, which she handled before laying him back down so that she could fit in a workout, then took a bath.

It was then that she realized just how long her husband had been gone for…

Loki stood in the throne room as his dark green eyes observed the cloaked figure of the Other. He should have realized that it would have been him that was sent.

"The Chitauri inform me that they are unhappy with the state of things in this realm," the Other slithered. "You are supposed to rule these mortals. Why are some of our number still dying at their hands? The news that you still do not have these humans under control is not pleasing to our Master." The strange alien moved closer causing Loki to tighten his grip on the scepter in his hand. "Is it true that you freed those superior humans, the Avengers. I'm beginning to think that you want to fail."

"They are no longer a threat and I have already begun a plan that will stop the unrest in this realm once and for all," Loki declared regally. "You coming here was a waste of your time and mine."

"For your sake you better be right," The Other advised with an evil grin.

Thomas had woken up fussy and with a slight fever during Loki's so Natasha walked the floor with him, softly rocking him as he lay against her chest. She knew he might be dealing with some teething issues, so she wasn't too alarmed. Finally, after he calmed down, they ended up on the couch with him asleep on her as she dozed off.

Loki strutted into the penthouse, his eyes falling upon the sleeping forms of his wife and son on the couch as he gently closed the door behind him. He moved toward them slowly. His head was still pounding with pain from the torture that the Other had inflicted upon him before he left. Just a touch of those scaly fingers to his temple was all that was required for his entire body to writhe in agony. It was a reminder from Thanos, the alien had told him. A reminder that he worked for him and that he was at his mercy.

The young god moved across the room toward the window and gazed out at the city lights below him. Even at this hour there were still people walking about under the street lamps. He twirled the handle of his scepter in his grip as he closed his eyes at the ache that seemed to fill his body. He turned back toward the living room as he watched his wife awaken.

Natasha smiled and carefully shifted as she put a hand on her sons back. She sat up and whispered, "I think he's teething…he's got a bit of a fever. Is everything alright?"

Loki nodded as he took a tentative step toward them, biting back a moan at the pain that shot through his muscles. He stopped as he took a slight breath before he continued moving closer with very cautious movements. "Poor little Prince," he soothed. "Is there anything I can do for him?"

"He'll be alright…"

Natasha noticed the tension in her husband's demeanor me slowly stood before laying Thomas down in the nursery and returning. She softly kissed his cheek, "I'm going to draw you a hot bath."

She entered their bathroom and filled the tub with warm water. She could sense something was wrong with him, but didn't want to push him to talk about anything he wasn't prepared to.

"Thank you, little spider," Loki remarked as he followed her to the bathroom. He rested the scepter against the door frame as he moved into the room. Seeing the Other again unnerved him and he felt more at ease having the staff close by. He moved to unclasp his top but hissed lowly at the pain that the action caused through his arm. Closing his eyes for a moment, he used his magic to discard his clothes. "The quicker way is always best." he jested as he stepped into the tub carefully.

Natasha sat on the edge of the tube, watching him, "He hurt you, my love…I can tell you're in pain…"

She frowned and glanced at the staff, "You're going to be indebted to them for the rest of your existence…well after I die. Just promise me you won't let our son get caught up in that mess."

Loki's dark green eyes gazed up at her. Thomas, he thought to himself, no he would never let them or anyone else have any type of power or influence over his son. "My deals are my own," he replied stoically. "They will not affect our son." He took her hand in his and brought it to his lips. "I promise you that, my little spider. I'm beginning to forget why I joined with them in the first place. But if I hadn't than I wouldn't have you so that makes everything worth it. Even a little pain. It will fade completely by tomorrow. You needn't worry."

Natasha leaned down to kiss him lovingly before setting a large towel on the edge of the tub, "I'm going to go lay down. Take your time…"

Loki enjoyed the feeling of the warm water along his limbs. He hoped that Natasha's plan would work out well. He needed to put an end to these uprisings once and for all. If the rebels dealt him another blow as they did against the Chitauri than Thanos would come for certain. He was no match for the Titan. He could not let him harm his family.

The young god rose from the water slowly as he wrapped the towel around his waist and moved toward the bedroom. He walked past the staff leaning against the doorway before stopping. He stared at the blue gem for a moment before picking up the scepter and continuing into the room.

Natasha was lying on the bed, her hands resting beneath the pillow as she curled up on her side but she was not asleep.

"He is unhappy that I freed the Avengers," Loki admitted as he twirled the staff in his hand. "He thinks it's a sign of weakness and blames the uprising on my poor choices. He was sent here to remind me of our deal and give me a taste of what lies in wait for me if I fail." His dark green eyes gazed at her sadly. The Fates forbid Thanos came here for him. They would be the first thing the Titan would use to make him suffer. "We need a plan of action in place. In case the worst happens, if the Titan ever comes here, little spider, you and our son will need to leave immediately. I'm not sure where yet but I will think on it."

His face turned into a frown as he turned his attention once more to the sparkling gem in his hand. He should have never let the Avengers go. It was a mistake. He still wasn't completely convinced that they weren't behind the rebellion somehow.

Natasha took his hand and gently pulled him to the bed with her. She realized that it was dangerous to be his wife…but this was a whole other ball game. If even Loki was afraid of this Thanos…that meant he truly had the capacity for evil.

She nodded in understanding at his words. If it were only her, she'd adamantly refuse, but Thomas was their first priority. His safety came first.

"I'll put together an emergency plan and have the nanny rehearse it in the event that I'm not here and Tommy is…there's a few exits we can use…" she murmured sadly. She hated the thought of being separated from him made her heart sink…and the thought at he'd have to face Thanos alone broke her heart.

"If it weren't for Thomas, I wouldn't let you face this alone…but I know you want me to be there for our son."

"I know that, my little spider," Loki whispered as he sat on the edge of the bed. "And I will do everything to ensure that it never comes to that but if it does than knowing that you and our son are safe is all that matters. I care not about what happens to me after that."

Natasha kissed his lips gently and stared into his eyes, "I care…you don't know the pain and sheer horror I'm feeling right now, imagining my life without you. It's…I just…"

She shook her head before wrapping her arms around him when she found herself at a loss for words, "I love you so much…"

"I love you, too, Natalia," Loki whispered softly as he held her close. "But please don't worry. We need to be prepared but I don't want you to be anxious about something that may never come to pass. I am here with you and I will do everything in my power to keep us together." He moved his lips gently over hers as he breathed in her scent. He loved having her in his arms.

Natasha slowly maneuvered onto his lap and kissed him passionately as she pulled down her nightgown, "I'm so in love with you…you and Thomas are everything to me…"

Loki smiled as he leaned in and kissed her passionately, his hands moving to caress her bared breasts. "You are my whole world, Natasha." He felt a sharp pain along his temple causing him to flinch as his hand moved to his head. She moved her body slightly as if she meant to get up but he grabbed her swiftly by the hips. "I want you… my body is going to hurt whether you touch me or not, little spider, I need you, Natalia."

Natasha slowly leaned forward to kiss him again, whispering, "I want you too, my love…"

She reached down between them to open his towel before she slowly maneuvered her hips forward, sinking down on his length. She peppered his neck with soft, wet kisses as she slowly began rolling her hips forward, careful not to be too rough on his battered body.

Loki opened his eyes as the sunshine fell across his face. He was disappointed to see that he was alone in the bed. He sat up and stretched his limbs, grateful to see that the pain of the night before was completely gone. Standing up, he dressed himself with magic before picking up the scepter and moving toward the nursery. As he suspected he found his wife sitting in the rocking chair, breast feeding their son.

"Good morning, little spider," He smiled as he walked toward her and leaned down to brush his lips along her forehead as he glided his fingers through his son's ebony locks. "And a good morning to you, little Prince." He took a step back as he observed them thoughtfully, his fingers running along the scepters point. "How are my favorite people this morning?"

Natasha nodded slowly as she rocked, "We're fine. He's doing much better this morning."

She eyes the scepter suspiciously and sighed softly, "You really need that while you're in your son's nursery, my love?"

"No… not really," Loki shrugged. He wasn't sure how to explain it but he just felt like he should keep it close to him. "But I was on my way to the office and… I have a need for it at the moment, little spider."

Natasha nodded and smiled as she stood to walk with him to the living room. Thomas detached from her breast and began whining, "Sad daddy's leaving? He'll be back my little pumpkin…it's alright."

Loki finished the days business as he sat in his office with his scepter in hand, his dark green eyes transfixed on the blue swirling motions of the stone within. He could feel his mood growing more somber. He had not heard anything yet on the fake base that he had set up. He wondered why they had not made any attempt on it yet. Could they know somehow that it was a trap? His thoughts turned once more toward the Avengers. His head growing heavy as the voices seemed to circle him like a lion stalking its prey. He should have never let them go. That one choice was going to be his undoing. He would find himself back inside the glass cage or worse, in the throes of agony at the hands of the Titan. All because he had been so desperate to please her. Because she cared for them more than anything else especially Barton. He ran his fingers along the gem as he pursed his lips in a frown.

Natasha was laying on the floor with her son, encouraging him to push up on his arms. She smiled and kissed his head, "Come on my big boy…you can do it…"

Loki strutted through the doors of the penthouse and closed the door swiftly. The scepter still held tightly in his grip as he took a step into the living room. His head ached and his mood was horrid. He had practically bitten off the head of every one of his subordinates whether they deserved it or not. The entire palace was walking around on eggshells as word of his irritable countenance spread quickly from those who had already experienced his wrath. His dark green eyes gaze along the floor as he watched his son push up on his arms for the first time. His head raised proudly for a few seconds before returning to rest once more.

Natasha smiled over her shoulder at Loki before returning her proud gaze to her son, "You're trying to impress your papa, aren't you?"

Thomas rolled onto his back and favored his mother with a toothless grin. Natasha chuckled and tickled his tummy before picking him up and walking over to Loki to kiss his cheek, "Hi love…is something wrong?"

"Have you been out today at all?" Loki stated coolly as he caressed the top of his son's head with his fingers. "Or have you been locked up inside like me, little spider?"

"We've been in today. I was tired. I didn't get much sleep last night so I napped when he did. How was your day?" she asked as she placed a kiss on the side of Thomas' head.

The fact that he was holding the scepter didn't go unnoticed by the former assassin.

"Still waiting for them to make a move," Loki drawled as he moved away from them and walked toward the window. "So not a very good day, unfortunately. I received my reports on your friends, little spider. Is there anything you would like to know about any of them?"

Natasha shook her head as she nuzzled her face into her son's hair, "Nope. I'm good."

The nanny came in to take Thomas into the nursery for a changing and a nap. Natasha pulled her husband into their bedroom, "Do you want to take a bath with me? You're tense and it might help."

Loki followed his wife into the bedroom. He wasn't sure why he couldn't shake his solemn mood. His dark green eyes stared at her for a moment as he tried to clear his thoughts. "You always take such good care of me," he said wistfully, his grip still firmly enclosed around his staff.

Natasha smiled and shrugged, "I try…"

She stripped down and walked into the barroom to start running the tub water. She smiled over her shoulder, "Take off your clothes and put down the staff…it's no fun if I'm the only naked one around…"

Loki followed her into the bathroom, enjoying the view of her naked body as she maneuvered around the tub and started the water. She was so gorgeous and he couldn't wait to run his hands along all of her luscious curves. Yet, there was a part of him that was annoyed with her. It was a small voice that was buried deep inside his head.

He didn't believe that she didn't care about what was happening with her former comrades. Especially Barton, the thought of which stoked his jealousy. Perhaps, she was finding out information on them all on her own. He ran his fingers through his long ebony locks as he tried to shake the idea from his mind. She would not go behind his back.

His dark green eyes became transfixed once more on the blue orb in the staff in his hand before he finally, reluctantly, propped it against the bathroom door. He placed his fingers along the buttons of his shirt as if to start undressing but he made no further movement as his eyes continued to focus on the scepter.

Natasha turned around to see him staring at the scepter. Something was wrong here…it was like the thing had put him in a daze. She walked over to him and gently tugged him to her as her fingers continued along the buttons of his shirt.

"Is my naked body not interesting enough to hold your attention, my king?" she inquired as a small smirk played across her lips. She leaned up and began trailing kisses down his neck.

Loki closed his eyes at the sensation of her lips across his skin. He could feel her fingertips ghosting along his chest as she undid his shirt and pulled it down his shoulders. The feeling of her naked body pressed against his made him moan in delight as he crushed his mouth to hers. "Mine," he nearly growled against her lips between kisses, barely giving her a chance to breath. "You are all mine."

Natasha moaned and let out a small, but pleasant squeal of surprise at the force of his kiss. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he marched her backwards until her back was pressed against the wall.

She felt him grab her arms and pin her wrists above her head.

"Wow…you…really missed me today, huh?" she barely managed to murmur through his hungry kisses.

Loki discarded the rest of his clothes with magic, lifting her up with one arm as she wrapped her legs around his waist. His other hand still firmly gripping her wrists above her head as he claimed her in one deep thrust, burying himself to the hilt. "Mine… you're mine… mine and no one else's." He gasped with a predatory snarl as he thrust wildly inside of her. "Say it. I want to hear you say it." He ordered as he suckled and nipped along her neck and shoulders, determined to leave a mark. He could think of nothing but claiming her as his.

Natasha arched and threw her head back, "Loki! Oh god! I'm yours! No one else's…I'm yours!"

She cried out as he drove himself into her over and over. His movements were forceful and animalistic…he'd never been this rough or primal before. While she was turned on by his possessive nature, through her reverie, part of her has to wonder where it was all coming from.

He buried his face in her neck, relishing the soft red curls that surrounded him as he exploded within her. Losing all control as his entire body shuddered in ecstasy. He slowly released her wrists as he moved his hand to rest against her hip. He could barely breath as the fog began to lift from his brain. "My little spider," he whispered softly against her throat.

Natasha panted as she slowly wrapped her arms around his neck to steady herself as he let her legs fall from around him. Her knees felt like jelly. She knew for certain if she hadn't been holding onto him, she would have collapsed on the ground.

"Wow…that was fun" she gasped through soft pants as she leaned back against the wall.

Loki made love to her again that evening, and she was fairly certain that they almost broke the bed.

The next morning, when she woke up, her body was sore. After her shower, she surveyed the damage to her naked body. Bruising on her wrists, hickeys littering the skin of her neck and chest. She laughed softly and got dressed before going into the bedroom, "You left quite an impression on my body, mister."

Her good mood soured slightly when she noticed he was holding the scepter.

"Are you on your way out?"

"Are you in a rush to get rid of me?" Loki mused as he sat along the bed, his fingers grazing along the blue jewel that glowed at the point of his staff. "I had no plans to leave just yet, little spider."

"No. No hurry at all, my love…I was just figuring that the reason you were holding that thing was because you were prepared to leave…" she murmured.

Natasha smiled sheepishly at him, "You got pretty wild last night. I feel like I've been in a car accident."

Loki's dark green eyes moved away from the stone as he finally gazed upon his wife, a sly smile spread across his lips. "I hope I wasn't too rough… I just can't get enough of you, my little spider. I like knowing you're mine."

Natasha moved to kiss his lips, "I'm a tough gal. I can take it…I like it rough sometimes."

She smirked and kissed him again, "So…why don't you set your staff down and join your son and I for breakfast?"

"You really don't like it do you?" Loki mused as took a loose strand of hair in his hand, twirling the strawberry ringlet around his fingers as he moved his lips sensually along her neck.

Natasha shivered against his touch as a soft moan escaped her lips. "No", she answered truthfully.

"If you think back, the worst arguments we've ever had have taken place while you held that thing…"

"I'm holding it now," Loki whispered as he moved his attentions the soft spot behind her ear. "We are not arguing. Are we, little spider?"

Natasha shuddered slightly and softly chastised him. He knew how hard it was for her to concentrate when he did that…

"Loki…no, we're not arguing, but you know how you get when you're holding that thing…anything sets you off…" she murmured as her eyes rolled closed. "I must say, you get so possessive when it's around…"

"I'm possessive of what's mine," Loki murmured as he nibbled on her earlobe. "I don't like the idea of anyone near what belongs to me." He ran his hand languidly up her inner thigh. "Especially you, little spider."

Natasha laughed softly as she moaned softly, "I belong to you and you belong to me…but I'm not terribly jealous of that hot blond secretary you have…because I trust you. You trust me, right?"

She raised a brow, "Should I be jealous?"

"You're the only woman I ever think of," Loki rasped as he moved his hand provocatively between her legs. "The only woman I want… I've never cared for anyone else." His dark green eyes staring down at her with a predatory gleam. Thoughts of Barton bubbling up in his mind. All the arguments they have ever had were because of him. He never loved another woman and he hated the fact that she ever loved another man. "It is not the same for you though, is it, little spider?"


	16. Chapter 16

Natasha panted softly and licked her lips as she fought to keep her eyes from rolling closed when he moved his hand to the apex of her thighs. She stared up at him, confused by his question.

"Wh-wh-what? You're the only man I love. The only man I want…the only man whose touch I long for…you can't possibly think differently…" she whispered through lust-filled moans.

Loki let the scepter drop to the floor. He enclosed his hand around the nape of her neck and pulled her mouth toward his as he crushed his lips to hers. "It wasn't always so," he rasped as he shifted their bodies and pushed her down onto the mattress, nudging her legs apart as he pressed himself against her so that she could feel the evidence of his arousal. The confines of his pants becoming near painful as he continued to lavish her with kisses. "I can't stand the idea of you with another man." She had loved Barton once, she had told him that herself. Did she ever think of him now? The thought made him near crazed. "You're mine.. Always.."

Natasha kissed him back hungrily, arching as she felt him thrust against her. She moaned softly, "There's only you, my love…you are my present and my future…I'm yours and no one else's, Loki…"

She felt him grind into her even harder and reached down to open his pants, "Take me…now. I'm yours…"

Loki grabbed the edge of her panties and ripped them off her body with one swift tug before entering her with a driving thrust. Swallowing her moans with a flurry of kisses, desperate to possess her, pounding into her again and again. He wanted her to think of nothing but him. "Say my name," He ordered as he gazed at her panting beneath him. "And open your eyes."

Natasha cried out, forcing herself to open her eyes, "Loki! Oh my god! Loki!"

She could barely form a coherent thought. Only his name and a string of screams to the heavens would spill from her lips as he relentlessly thrust into her. Natasha felt her body begin to violently buck against him as she hit her peak, screaming his name one last time as her body arched beneath his.

Loki collapsed on his side next to her as he lovingly stroked her cheek, his dark green eyes gazing into hers. "I love watching you come undone, my little spider, there is no more beautiful sight in all of the nine realms."

Natasha panted and blinked slowly, unable l really verbalize her feelings at the moment. She had just woken up an hour prior, but her body felt so weak and drained, she felt as though she was about to fall right back to sleep.

Soon, she did.

Loki smiled wistfully as he watched her eyelids grow heavier until she fell asleep. He pulled a blanket over her and brushed his lips gently over hers before leaving to attend to his royal tasks. His happy mood soon soured over the course of his morning, growing worse and worse as the day progressed. It culminated in an explosion of anger directed at his secretary who had misplaced the folder for that days Intel on Tony Stark.

The woman cowered as she frantically searched her desk while he loomed over her, cursing her for her incompetence and threatening her with the fulfillment of her worst fears if she didn't find it. He slammed the point of his scepter into the floor to emphasize his displeasure just as he noticed for the first time that Natasha had entered the room. He wondered absently how long she had been there as he noted the look in her dark blue eyes.

Natasha cautiously moved further into his office, her eyes falling to the shaking blond cowering beside her husband. She took note of the scepter, "Hillary…I'll help him find it. Go fix yourself some coffee…you'll probably need to be decaf."

The woman eagerly fled the office, bursting into tears as soon as she hit the door. Natasha moved closer to Loki, "Wanna tell me what that was all about?"

"That incompetent fool misplaced the day's reports from the spy's that are keeping tabs on the man of iron," Loki snapped angrily as he began to pace his secretary's small office. "I want to know what he's doing. How hard is it to keep track of a simple piece of paper? I don't trust him. I don't trust any of them. They are lying in wait, I know it."

Natasha held her hands up cautiously as she slowly moved toward the desk and began searching. She sighed, "People make mistakes, love. No one is perfect. She could have issues at home or something could be on her mind…there's no sense in threatening her life over a piece of paper…"

She picked up a file, "Here, Tony Stark report…and it has today's date on it…"

When he snatched the file from her, she couldn't help but glare, "Why are you mad at me?"

"Why are you looking at me like I have two heads?" Loki fumed as he read through the papers before shutting the file and slamming it back down on the desk. "I expect people to do their job proficiently, Is that too much to ask for?"

Natasha furrowed her eyebrows, "Why are you yelling at me? Calm down! I didn't do anything wrong here. You might need to take a break because you're ranting like a lunatic. Is this how you're going to act toward our son if he gets a problem wrong on a test or messes up while he's playing little league? It's that fucking staff. I'll bet you're in a shitty mood right now and cannot, for the life of you, figure out why. I don't want that thing in our home anymore. It turns you into someone else…"

She turned around and started toward the door.

Loki rushed in front of her as he slammed the door shut. "I think I've told you before that you do not walk away from me, little spider." He snipped as he stood in front of the now closed door. "I've already told you that I need this staff. I need the power that it gives me to keep the Chitauri in line. Perhaps, you want me to be weak and an easy target for your friends. Is that it?"

Natasha stared at him with her mouth agape. After all they've been through together, he's still accusing her of siding with the Avengers. She glared at him and tried to move around him to get to the door, but he easily blocked her departure.

"Listen to yourself! How DARE you keep accusing me of that! You're being crazy! Get out of my way! I'm done speaking to you as long as you're being this ridiculous!" she yelled as she tried to shove him from in front of the door.

"You're not leaving me," Loki frothed as he stood there immovable as stone as she attempted to shove him out of her way. There was a small part of him, deep down that knew that she was right. There was no reason for him not to trust her and yet it was too hard to grasp onto under the flood of noise thundering through his head. Letting the Avengers go had been a mistake. It brought the anger of Thanos upon him because of her. All because she wanted it. She made him weak. He couldn't afford to be weak. "You will stay here until I tell you otherwise." His grip on his staff tightening in his fury.

Natasha glared at him, "I don't even know who you are when you're like this! You're not the man I love! It's that staff! It turns you into a monster. I don't want to speak to you until you're yourself again, Loki! You're being completely irrational. Let me go!"

"Monster," Loki seethed, his dark green eyes narrowing as he grabbed her by the arm and dragged her past his secretaries desk into his own office. He released her forcefully as she stumbled into the room. The young god spun around and slammed his door shut and locked it before returning his attention to his wife. "Is that what you think? You are no different than the rest of your number. Throwing that in my face."

His brain was pounding as the noise in his head grew louder. All his insecurities about his heritage flooding his brain. Even after all this time was he no more than a Frost Giant who took over her precious world?

"I guess I can't argue with that," Loki spit out as he loomed over her. "I'm nothing but a monster. The monster that you slept with so that your friends and your lover could have a new life. That's all you ever cared about isn't it?"

"STOP IT!" she screamed. "Can't you just take a moment to listen to yourself!?"

Natasha backed away from him, "You keep accusing me of that every time you're holding that fucking thing! It makes you paranoid! I tell you I love you, that's not good enough! You got me pregnant just to keep me with you because my word wasn't good enough and that almost killed me! And here you are, questioning my loyalty to you while the child we share in sleeping just a couple of floors away! It's that thing! Stop saying these things!"

She tried to move around him to the door, "I need to go! You're being crazy. I can't talk to you like this!"

"Stop saying that!" Loki bellowed as he grabbed her by the arm and shook her roughly. "Stop calling me crazy! You're not going anywhere! Get that through your thick skull. You are never leaving me!"

Natasha struggled against him, hitting him in the chest as his grip tightened on her arm. There would be bruises there for certain, "Let me go! Stop it! Loki! Stop!"

"You stop!" Loki snarled as he shoved her back towards his desk and away from the door. "Where do you want to go so badly? What's the matter, little spider, don't tell me the infamous black widow is afraid of me?"

Natasha stumbled, landing against his desk hard, causing her to his in pain. She glared at him, "Loki…look at me…you're not yourself. Please, just put the staff down!"

"You want this kingdom to crumble don't you?" Loki barked as he closed the distance between them so that she was cornered against the desk. "You won't be happy until I'm back in your little glass cage." He closed his eyes for a moment, the pain in his head near unbearable as he rested the point of the scepter against the desk, his hand clenching around the handle with all of his might. It was almost as if he couldn't let go of it. Even if he wanted to.

Natasha panicked. The look in his eyes was the unrecognizable glint of a man unhinged. Even their love wasn't enough to bring him back from this particular brink. She was cornered…and like an animal, her instinct told her to strike, so she did.

She screamed for him to move away, but when he continued backing her into the wall, she went with her instincts and laid a quick punch to the side of his face.

The look on his face made her immediately regret that…

Loki's face whipped to the side as her fist connected with his jaw. He turned back to her in a rage as he wrapped his fingers around her neck. "Do you wish to fight me, Agent Romanoff," he spat out, his dark green eyes beginning to glaze over with a pale blue sheen. "Do you think you're a match for me?" The tint of his iris's deepening to a darker blue with every word he spoke.

Natasha's eyes widened as she immediately attempted to pry his hands from around her neck, but it was no use. He was a god. Despite her own strength, she wasn't much of a match for him.

"Loki…" she choked out as one hand frantically moved to loosen his tightening grip from around her neck and the other pushed against his chest. "Loki…let go…" she said as she let out a strangled cry and began clawing at his face as he pushed her backwards against the desk.

"If I'm a monster than what does that make you?" Loki grated as he tightened his grip. The noise in his head was deafening. She didn't love him. It was all a ruse. She was only here to cause his downfall. "The monster's whore?" His dark blue eyes glaring at her coldly.

Natasha couldn't breathe. She knew that she would lose consciousness if he held on much longer. She kept trying to push him away and wrap her arms from around her neck, but she couldn't. She wildly reached out onto his desk for something as her hands found their way to a paperweight. She grabbed it and hit him in the side of the head with it.

Loki felt a blow to his head as he stumbled backward slightly, releasing his hold on her. He felt the blood trickling along his forehead as the fog seemed to start to lift while he gazed at his wife in confusion. She was standing in front of him holding a paperweight. He touched his finger to his temple and stared at the blood on his fingers. The blue fading as the dark emerald color returned to his eyes. He slowly realized what he had been doing.

The young god glanced at the scepter in his hand before he threw it across the room. He almost killed her. How could he have done that? Loki moved toward the door swiftly and unlocked it, pushing it open and moving out of the way as he kept his back to his wife. "Get out!" he ordered. "I won't stop you, little spider."

Natasha had dropped to the floor, wheezing and coughing as she held her throat. She'd been on the brink of losing consciousness, and dark spots were still dancing before her vision. She scrambled to her feet and sprints out of his office, tears flowing freely down her face.

He'd almost killed her…the man she loved. Her husband. The father of her child…had been mere moments from ending her. How could he? Of all the things he'd put her through…

When she burst into the penthouse, the nanny jumped.

"Remember that emergency exit plan?" she asked hoarsely. The young woman nodded in response, "Get his car seat and stroller. We're leaving."

Within moments, the nanny, Natasha and Thomas were taking a back exit out of the building.

Loki heard her footsteps as she ran from the room. He walked slowly toward the scepter that was lying on the floor with a wave of his hand it dematerialized from the room. Moving towards his desk, he slumped into the chair and buried his face in his hands. He had almost killed her. He loved her more than anything and he nearly choked the life right out of her. He really was a monster.

The Lieutenant knocked cautiously on the door to his office. "Your Majesty, our agents just informed me that your wife has taken your child and left the palace. From the looks of them, it looked like they weren't planning on coming back. I have my best man tailing them."

"Call them off," Loki ordered. "I don't want them followed. I don't want to know where they are. Now get out."

Natasha dropped their nanny off in New Jersey at her friend's house before she and Thomas continued on to Newark Airport. She had an emergency bag that contained the basics of what she and Thomas would need, along with a decent amount of cash that should enable her to fly virtually anywhere.

She didn't know where to go.

Loki had been her everything. She'd cut herself off from the only other friends she knew to appease him…now she was all alone with her baby boy.

By the time she reached the airport, she decided on London. It was a random choice, but figured that getting out of the country was the best bet. She'd always liked England…

The flight was rough…not because she was traveling with an infant, but because she was so heartbroken. She cried more than Thomas did on the flight. When they landed, she checked into a hotel and lay Thomas down in the roll away crib. She stood there, leaning over the side as she stroked his dark hair. The hair that reminded her of his father.

In the last 15 hours, she'd lost almost everything. All she had left was her son…and she was determined to protect him, even from his own father.

The silence in the penthouse was deafening as he walked through the living room and down the hallway. Loki stopped in the doorway of the nursery. His son would be better off without him. They both would be. He still could not believe what he had done. When he thought of that moment when he held her neck in his hands it was like a weird dream, a strange nightmare that he couldn't wake up from. He moved further into the room and placed his fingers inside the crib, his eyes drifting to the rocking chair where she used to breastfeed in the early mornings. He used to love to watch them together.

He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes as he quickly left the room. He didn't know what to do with himself. He felt empty and broken. He had known this feeling before when he was dangling on the bifrost. Just like then he had nothing left.

Natasha employed the use of her hacking skills to set herself up with a well-stocked bank account so that she and Thomas would be able to live comfortably. She purchased an apartment in a nice neighborhood in north London, and after extensive background checks, hired a part time nanny.

All seemed normal enough. Every morning, she'd strap her son into his jogging stroller and go for a run in the park. They went to the library, zoo, shopping, baby gymnastics, road trips…anything to keep her distracted from the hole in her chest.

Every night, after laying her son down for bed, she'd weep for the loss of her husband. She swore that she could feel actual physical pain from his absence.

What would she tell her son? What if Loki came after them? These questions would haunt her forever.

Loki strutted through the office doors, fully adorned in his royal armor. His green cape flowing behind him as he moved swiftly into the room. The man of Iron was gazing up at him from his desk as a startled Ms. Potts stood from the chair at his side.

"I don't recall us having an appointment," Tony remarked with a furrowed brow as he rose from the chair. "I was pretty sure you didn't want to do business with me anymore." He turned to Pepper as he quipped. "The guy can't take a joke."

"Tony, behave," Pepper whispered under her breath.

"I don't like you. I never did," Loki snapped as he conjured the scepter in his hand. "You don't remember that but you will soon enough." The dark blue gem growing brighter as he began to cast his spell. The man of Iron would be the first but before the evening was through all of the Avengers would remember everything. Let them take back their world and put him out of his misery.


	17. Chapter 17

Natasha and Thomas were just about to go for their morning run when the word "Avengers" being said by the news anchor on her kitchen television stopped her. Thomas was now almost 10 months old, but despite the time that had passed since leaving Loki, her pain from their separation was still as fresh as it was all those months ago.

Her son sat in his high chair, eating Cheerios with his fingers as she turned up the volume on her television.

"Captain America and Iron Man have resurfaced. They were last seen with two other members of the superhero group known as The Avengers destroying one of Loki's main bases of operation just outside of New York. There is speculation that the palace is their next target."

Natasha flew into action, rushing around the apartment to collect her and Thomas' things. Twelve hours later, she was landing in New York. The formerly defunct SHIELD headquarters would be her first stop.

When she arrived, the guards out front recognized her. They radioed into the facility and had her escorted in, where she waited in an office until Clint, Tony, Bruce and Steve filed in.

"Tasha…it's you…"

She nodded solemnly and shifted her sons weight in her arms as she accepted hugs from her former teammates, "It's me…how did you guys come from under the spell?"

Tony raised his hand and pointed at her, "You might want to ask your estranged husband about that."

"Loki did this?" she asked incredulously.

Steve sighed, "If you ask me, Loki is trying to commit suicide. We've been attacking his bases all around the country and he's not so much as lifted a finger to fight back. In fact, he's led his chitaturi troops into blatant traps. He's lost it…"

"I guess you guys know I left him a few months back…"

Clint nodded, "We know…we have a couple of former palace guards who have offered us Intel in exchange for their lives…I knew he'd hurt you, Tasha…"

Natasha shook her head, "I don't want to talk about that right now…but I do have to see him before you attack the palace."

"What? Noooo…no way lady", quipped Tony.

Natasha fixed him with a glare, "He's still my husband…still the father of my child…and I still…"

She lowered her head as her voice trailed off. Clint furrowed his brows in utter confusion and he stuttered, "You…you still love him…"

"Look, just…let me go in and talk to him. Maybe there doesn't have to be an attack at all. Loki is under the influence of Thanos…he's a powerful Titan who tends to manipulate his emotions in a very dangerous way. If I can manage to talk him down, I can help put an end to this."

The men stared at her for several long moments before Steve sighed, "Hook her up with a panic button. We'll escort her, but hang back a couple of blocks so he doesn't suspect anything…"

An hour later, Natasha was getting out of the cab in front of the palace. She'd left Thomas with Pepper just in case…

There were no guards…no personnel. She was able to walk right into the throne room without passing a single living being.

Loki was sitting on his throne with a sketch pad in his hands as he made yet another attempt to draw a picture of his family. There was always something about the portraits that he didn't like. They were never good enough. He couldn't capture them to his satisfaction. There were papers strewn all about the floor around. His face was pursed in concentration as he tried to recapture the memory of his son pushing up for the first time. He remembered the proud little smile on his face. He could picture it clearly but he couldn't get it onto the paper. He erased the line frantically as he attempted to sketch it out once more.

The Avengers were taking forever to overtake his armies. He had been ordering them into places that he knew would mean the alien soldiers demise. How much more ways could he help them finish their job? The scepter was sealed in glass along the far wall. It was a special glass fortified with an enchantment to keep its mystical powers contained within it. He needed the Chitauri commanders to see that it was still his, that he was still in power, or they wouldn't take his orders but he didn't want it nearer to him than that.

His dark green eyes gazed up at the sound of her footsteps but he quickly turned his attention back to the notebook in his hands. His pencil working feverishly. "You shouldn't be here. I'd prefer if you left." he said absently as he shaded in his son's dark hair.

Natasha glanced at the papers strewn all over the floor. She met his eyes and watched as he turned his eyes back down to the paper. Her mouth dropped open, "That's all you have to say to me?"

"What else could I possibly say?" Loki advised solemnly as he began to erase the tiny nose that he had drawn. It wasn't quite right. He wanted it to be perfect. "There are no words that will ever… it is not safe here. Just go and take care of our son."

Natasha cautiously moved closer. He was broken. She could plainly see that…but she was still caught between being angry at him for not listening to her about the damn staff and still being devastatingly in love with him.

"I was taking care of him…until I heard that his father was on a suicide mission…"

Natasha ran a hand through her red curls and shook her head, "I don't want you to die. I know…I know I should hate you. I know I should be afraid of you…after…" She paused and moved closer to him, "…I still love you, Loki…so much it hurts. And Thomas…he's so big now. He's started saying little words. Not much but…" Natasha smiled through newly fallen tears. It felt like her heart was being ripped out.

"Loki…please, look at me."

Loki could feel the tears welling up in his eyes as he tried desperately to keep them at bay. He refused to look up from his portrait. He wondered how different he must look than the tiny infant that he was attempting to draw. "I want you to leave. You need to be with our son. Keep him safe until the war is over. Soon your world will be back to the way it is supposed to be and the two of you will never have to be afraid of anything again. If you still love me then you'll go. I don't want you here when they come for me."

"They're a couple of blocks away, Loki. They know I'm here. They won't come as long as I'm in here…"

Natasha stared at him, desperately attempting to think of a way to break him out of his depressive daze. Suddenly, she yanked her phone out of her pocket and moved to kneel beside his throne, showing him an updated picture of Thomas. She was standing up beside a couch in her apartment, holding onto it as he smiled a mostly toothless grin at the camera. Drool dribbled down his chin and his wide open mouth showed off the evidence of one white bud of a tooth.

"He started pulling up on things…he's such a happy baby…Loki, please. You can't sit there and tell me you don't want to live for him…for ME."

She felt anger, hurt, betrayal, want and every other emotion in existence bubbling up in her chest as his eyes fell to the phone in her hand.

Natasha sobbed, "Why didn't you listen to me when I told you about that thing!? Why did you never trust me the way I trusted you!?"

Loki traced a long, slender finger along the picture screen as he stared at his little boy. He could no longer stop the tears that fell down the edges of his face. "Don't kid yourself, little spider," he remarked dejectedly as he moved his hand away from her phone and got up from the throne and rested his sketchbook on the dais as he walked towards the center of the room. It was too difficult to be near her.

"That was all me. It may have enhanced things a bit but it didn't make me anything that I wasn't already." He brushed his hair through his dark ebony locks as he purposefully kept his back to her. Moving himself, when she got too near or came into his line of vision. It hurt to even look at her knowing what he had done. "I am that monster. I knew it the moment I stepped foot in Jotunnheim and that creature touched me. I saw my skin turn blue. I've been trying desperately to deny it ever since but I need no more proof than that… what I did… I trust you… I trust you with our son… I trust you to give him a wonderful happy life… I trust you to take care of yourself and do what's best for our boy… So you see I trust you with everything I hold dear, little spider, with everything that matters to me. Now please go."

Natasha shook her head as tears continued streaking down her face, "So…this is it?"

She watched him feebly nod as he kept his back to her. She let out a deep breath, "The least you can do is tell me goodbye properly. Have the courage to face me…give me closure. I deserve that at least…don't I?"

Loki turned around slowly as his dark green eyes fell upon his wife. His cheeks covered in the tears that he could not seem to stop from seeping down from the edges of his eyes. "How does one say goodbye properly to their heart? I have missed you so much. I wish there was something that I could say or do… sorry sounds so pathetic… I am sorry."

Natasha rushed to him, practically throwing herself into his arms as she wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face against his chest, sobbing heavily.

"I have been crying myself to sleep every single night, longing for your touch…I sometimes wake up thinking I can almost feel your hands brushing through my hair. I lay there, wondering what I'm going to tell our son…one day he's going to realize that he doesn't have a father. What will I say?! What will I say to him when he performs in a school play or something and every other kid has a father there but he doesn't? What do I tell him?! This isn't fucking fair!" she cried. "You made me fall in love with you and now I'm broken!"

Loki closed his eyes as he breathed in the scent of her, his arm instinctively wrapping around the small of her back as his other hand ran along the soft curls of her hair that cascaded down her shoulders. "I'm sorry, little spider; I never wanted to hurt you… I only ever wanted to make you happy… I failed miserably… tell Thomas I love him… I love you both."

Natasha sobbed against him and shook her head, "No. No. No. It can't end like this. It won't end like this."

She pulled back to look into his eyes as she enclosed his face in her hands, "Please, Loki…we can fix this. Please. Don't leave me alone. I can't take it…I've missed you so desperately I actually feel physical pain. Please…please…"

Natasha was begging now…but she could care less. She needed him. Damn her pride. She knew he wasn't a real monster. It was Thanos. It was that staff. It was the pressure to maintain order and rule.

She pressed frantic, quick kisses over his cheeks and lips as she pleaded with him, "Loki…please. Your son needs you…I need you. Please. Don't leave us…"

Loki's entire being felt lighter, like a weight was being lifted from his shoulder as he felt the sensation of her feathering kiss across his face, her arms around his neck. For a moment, it was as if nothing bad had ever happened and they could just go on with their lives. He enclosed her face in his large hands as he gazed into her dark blue eyes, still glistening with tears. He leaned in and kissed her softly, savoring every movement of her lips. It had been so long.

"I want nothing more than to be with the two of you but I don't trust myself. A better man would have fought it harder… would have been able to stop… I don't deserve either of you," he whispered finally. "And I don't want our son involved with my mistakes. I thought about it long and hard and this is the perfect way. If I freed your realm than Thanos would just send someone else to finish where I failed. But when the Avengers defeat me and his armies then he may think your planet is more trouble than it's worth."

Natasha kissed him desperately, her hands expertly releasing the straps of his armor, "If this is the last time I see you, say goodbye properly. Please…you owe me that…"

She kissed him hungrily again as his cape and armor fell to the floor behind him. Before he could protest, she broke the kiss and yanked her shirt off over her head before reconnecting her lips to his to resume the frantic kiss.

Loki kissed her back with equal fervor as his hands moved to cup her breast over the lacy fabric of her bra. He was desperate for her, desperate to feel her once more. "I love you, Natalia; I love you so much… I'm so sorry, little spider."

"Shhhh…" she said, gently shushing him as she pressed a finger to his lips. She stared up into his eyes for a few moments before she lovingly kissed him again. It didn't take long before they were both divested of their clothes and laying among them on the floor of the throne room.

Loki ran his fingers through her soft curls, twisting one strawberry strand playfully through his fingers as he gazed down at the woman curled up in his arms. "I don't know what to say… I wish… well, wishes are pointless aren't they? I love you, my little spider, I always will."

Natasha pulled his face to hers for another kiss, "I love you too, Loki…more than I thought I could love anyone or anything. I…I can't say goodbye."

"I don't want you to, either," Loki whispered sadly, "But you both deserve better than me. Far better… Besides, if you don't leave than the Avengers won't come and you'll ruin my whole plan." He smiled faintly as he caressed her cheek, tracing her lip with his thumb. "And we can't have that now can we, little spider?"

Natasha shook her head and turned her head to softly kiss his palm. She redressed slowly, knowing that if she refused to leave, all he had to do was use his magic to transport her away from him. She wrapped her arms around him, kissing him lovingly as she whispered against his lips, "My love…you say I deserve better…but I don't want better. I'll never have better…because there will never be a day when I won't long for you."

"I want nothing more than to be with you," Loki entreated as he pulled her closer before letting her go as he walked toward the far wall where the scepter was held in its case. "I don't even know why I'm here. I wanted to prove that I was worthy to my… so-called father and then somehow I ended up agreeing to rule here. I don't know... it made sense at the time… it doesn't anymore. I wish I could blame it all on this thing but I can't."

The young god turned back to his wife. He wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of his days with her and their child. "I long for you, too, little spider and I always will. I can't believe you can even look at me after what I did but I'm grateful… I'm…. well… we really have kept your friends long enough."

Natasha slowly and reluctantly moved toward the door. Just before turning the hand, she turned around and met his eyes before whispering, "I love you…"

She finally turned around and left him. When she exited the palace, she dropped to her knees and began sobbing. SHIELD personnel scooped her up and began moving her away from the palace, "No! Don't hurt him! He's unarmed! He won't fight!"

Steve approached, "Natasha…of course he would tell you that. He—"

"You don't know him!" she screamed. "He's lost everything…just…please. Don't hurt him."

Bruce, who was still just Bruce, exchanged looks with Tony, Steve and Clint before the four of them, along with a strike team cautiously entered the palace to take Loki.

Loki watched the four Avengers enter the throne room as he stood there staring at the painting that he made of his wife and son that hung behind the dais. The young god turned slowly with his hands in the air to show that he was unarmed.

"It took you long enough," He smiled wryly. "Earth's mightiest heroes... you're not very impressive at all."

Clint took a menacing step forward but Steve put his hand against his chest.

"I'll take him out," Rogers directed as he took the cuffs off of Hawkeye's belt and stepped toward the young god and proceeded to handcuff his arms around his back before taking him to Shield headquarters.

Natasha rushed into the headquarters and moved directly to Fury, "Where are you keeping him?"

"That is none of your business, Romanoff. As of the moment you became pregnant with his child, you were considered irrevocably compromised and you have no business here. Barton, please escort Ms. Romanoff out."

Clint moved to take her arm, "Come on, Tasha…"

She snatched out of his grasp, "I am NOT leaving here without seeing where you're keeping him. I lived and breathed him for almost two years. I have Intel you might find valuable."

Fury glared at her with his one good eye and motioned toward Steve, "Take her to see him."

Steve led her away. As they walked to the holding cell area, he cleared his throat, "I think I should tell you…Thor is going to be taking him back to Asgard tomorrow. I hate Loki as much as the next guy, but I think…I think it would be appropriate if you gave him the chance to say goodbye to his son."

Natasha nodded, forcing herself to hold back the tears, "Steve…would you tell Tony to call Pepper…have her bring Thomas here…"

When they reached his cell, she stepped up to the bars, "Loki…"

"You shouldn't be here, little spider," Loki remarked as he moved toward her swiftly and reached for her hand through the bars, rubbing his thumb back and forth over her wedding rings. He had resigned himself to the fact that he would more than likely never see her again. "It can't be good for you to be seen with me."

Natasha reached through the bars with her free hand and cupped his face in her hand, "I don't care…" Her eyes slowly grew wet as she stroked the contours of his face, "They told me Thor is taking you to Asgard tomorrow…"

"Yes, little spider," Loki divulged as he tilted his head slightly to kiss her palm. "My punishment has already been set. The All-Father is nothing if not efficient. Thor told me all about it." He brought her palm to rest against his chest as he gazed softly in her eyes. "But let's not waste our time on that. We seem to always be meeting each other when one of us is in prison. Eh heh heh heh, we should really stop that, little spider." He smiled faintly but the laughter failed to reach his eyes.

Natasha tried to smile, but her bottom lip trembled and she let out a soft, strangled cry as she took a few deep breaths in an effort to steady the shakiness in her voice. She sniffled softly as she moved the hand that was resting against his chest to grasp his collar and pull him toward the bars so that she could rest her forehead against his.

She just stood like that for several moments, breathing him in. Pepper and Tony entered the chambers. Pepper was carrying Thomas. Natasha slowly released Loki to walk over and take her son from her, thanking her as they turned and left.

Natasha bounced the sleepy-eyed infant a little, "Remember daddy? Here's daddy…say hi."

The infant briefly raised a hand, opening and closing it at Loki before laying his head back on his mother's chest.

"By the nines, you are such a big boy, my little prince." Loki wrapped his hands around the bars as he gazed at his son. He wanted to reach out and touch him but he was afraid to. He wondered if he even remembered him. "I love you, Thomas. He's so tired… you go ahead and rest." The young god closed his eyes against the onslaught of tears that were threatening to burst any minute. "Thank you for the thought, Natalia, I truly appreciate it but this is no place for him."

Natasha nodded slowly as she pressed her lips against Thomas' dark hair, "I'll be right back…"

She left and returned moments later alone. She moved back toward the bars and wrapped her hands around his as they held onto the bars. She leaned forward, pressing her forehead against his. After several long moments of silence, she whispered, "Do you regret anything? With us, I mean…I don't…I just wish…we had more time."

"I regret hurting you," Loki murmured softly as he dropped his gaze from hers. "I would give anything to take that moment away." He shook his head slightly as he raised his dark emerald eyes once more. "I'm grateful for every minute with you. I'll never forget a second. From our wedding to teaching me monopoly to watching you hold our son for the first time. Every moment is ingrained in me. You made me very happy."

Natasha kissed him as she squeezed his hand tight. Her chest hurt so badly…it was as if she'd been stabbed directly in the chest. It was almost unbearable.

"I knew I was falling in love with you long before that night I danced for you…I know you remember that night well. I just…I was afraid of saying it, because bad things happen to people who entrust their hearts with others…I guess we're proof of that, huh?" she tried to laugh softly, but was soon choking back a sob as she pressed her forehead against his again. "You've made me really happy too…you've given me far more than you realize…"

Natasha refused to leave him for the remainder of the night. Early the next morning, Thor and the rest of the team came in. He regarded them solemnly, "It is time…"

She erupted into tears, "No. No. More time…please. More time. I can't…I'm not ready. We're not ready. Please."

Her pleas fell on deaf ears. Steve moved toward Natasha and placed an arm around her, holding her back as they opened Loki's cell. They replaced his handcuffs as Thor took him by the arm and began marching him out. Natasha began struggling against Captain America in earnest, breaking away from him and sprinting after Loki. She wrapped her arms around him and whispered, "I love you…I love you…"

She yanked her pocket knife out of her pocket and cut off a lock of her long curls, then slowly slid it into the pocket of his pants.

"I never loved anyone before I met you, Natalia," Loki whispered, "My heart will always be yours, little spider." Before Thor pulled him away from her and lead him to the platform to be taken back to Asgard. He already knew what was awaiting him there. He would be suffering the serpent's venom to pay for all the lives that were lost because of his schemes. A very painful punishment that would have no end in sight. He steeled himself with a slight smirk as he waited for his brother to enact the Tesseract. Let the All-Father have his fun, the fact was that his true punishment had already begun. There was nothing that Odin could do to him that would be worse than the heartache that consumed him at the loss of his wife and son.


	18. Chapter 18

Natasha knelt on the ground as she watched the light consume him and he disappeared from her sight. She sat there sobbing for nearly an hour before she forced herself to calm down. Loki was gone…but their son still needed her.

She took him from Pepper and left the headquarters, but Clint rushed after her, calling her name.

"Tasha…are you gonna be ok?"

Natasha turned around briefly to stare at him with a steely cold gaze, "No…but I'll survive…"

She turned and walked away from him. She returned to the empty palace and went straight to their penthouse. She could tell that Loki had kept it preserved…even the night gown she'd worn the night before she left him was still lying across the unmade bed.

She moved into the nursery and changed the sheet in the crib before laying her son down before walking back into the bedroom to lie on his side of the bed and bury her face in his pillow.

As Loki materialized on the palace atrium, he was stunned by the sudden rush of movement and arms that enveloped him as Frigga rushed to his side.

"Are these bindings really necessary," Frigga remarked as she turned to Odin. "Did he not surrender to the Midgardian's peacefully and fully prepared to face his punishment?"

"He is a war criminal," Odin replied regally. "And he will be treated as such." The All-Father motioned for the guards to take him away.

"I would like a few moments with my son before he faces your judgment," Frigga demanded.

"He has delayed justice for long enough," the All-Father insisted. "I can't in good conscience delay it any longer."

"For once we are in agreement, Father," Loki spat out. "I appreciate the sentiment, Mother, but I'm not a little boy who can hide behind your skirts any longer and I would like to meet with my fate as soon as possible." The young god leaned forward and kissed his mother softly on the cheek before he was taken away by the guards to the serpent's lair.

It had been 8 long months since Loki's departure. Natasha never quite got used to the pain in her chest, but she learned how to cope with it. It felt like half of her soul was missing.

Thomas grew into a very precocious and bright little toddler. Natasha showed him a picture of his father every day and let him know exactly who his daddy was. She regaled the little boy with funny stories about his father and sweet stories about their love. She loved talking to Thomas about Loki. Even if the little boy couldn't quite understand everything she said, it made her feel better to talk to him about his dad.

Shortly after Loki's departure, Natasha moved into her own apartment in Brooklyn. There, she made a home for her son.

All was quiet as it could be until one night she woke up with an uneasy feeling. Her immediate instinct told her to go check on her son. As soon as she entered Thomas's room, she was confronted by the sight of a cloaked figure leaning over her son's crib.

The creature turned around and hissed at her before it disappeared into thin air. She rushed to the room, grabbed her son and fled from the apartment. She immediately went SHIELD and relayed her story to Nick Fury, Steve Rogers and Bruce Banner. All were fairly skeptical, but Steve knew that Natasha wasn't one to just see things. Thor, who had been visiting Jane Foster in New Mexico, was called. The description Natasha gave of the creature that had come after Thomas struck a chord with the god. Hours later, he'd joined them at SHIELD.

"The creature of which you speak is known as a demon. They have been known to shape shift and materialize out of thin air. There is only one being I know of who can match their power…" he said slowly.

"Who?" she asked.

Tony caught a look in Thor's eyes and let out a breath as the realization dawned on Natasha.

"Loki…" she breathed.

"If they came after the boy once. They will come after him again. They want him for a reason. No one knows more about demons than Loki."

"Then you have to get him here. Bring him here. My son's life depends on it! Or is the Allfather willing to let an innocent child suffer and die?"

Thor ran a hand down his face and thought for several moments, "I will go to Asgard and plead for Loki's release for his son's sake…"

Loki had long since lost track of time. His existence had become little more than a constant state of agony as the drops of venom made their way into his eyes over and over again. He had been chained to this tree by unbreakable bonds that circled his waist and tied his wrists together so that his arms wrapped around the back of the large oak. Another binding held his neck in place so that he could not turn his head from the poison as it dripped from the gigantic serpent that dwelt in the branches above him.

The young god desperately tried to think through the torment that thundered through him. His intellect was all he had left at his disposal and with each pang of misery that filled him he fought to bring his mind somewhere else. He was rarely successful. The pain was far too great but sometimes he did. Sometimes he could see her in his mind. And for those few seconds the suffering was bearable.

And then suddenly there was no more pain. Loki blinked incoherently as he took in his surroundings. His eyesight was too blurry to make out anything more than colorful blobs of shape. Was he hallucinating? He could hear is brother's voice and the sound of the All-Father as his vision began to clear.

"This was too much," Thor entreated. "This was far worse than I ever imagined it was."

"I'm allowing him to leave with you to help the boy but I am not negating his sentence," The All-Father remarked sternly. "Justice will be served. You will return him here once the demon is caught."

Loki looked towards his left he could clearly make out the large oak that had been his resting place for only the Fates knew how long. The serpent slithering along the top. It was strange to see it from this vantage point. They had freed him from his bindings but why? He turned his head back toward his brother. He realized for the first time that the thunder god had his arm around him and was helping him stand.

"What is going on? Who… who says…. I want to… to help… with your demon problem?" Loki stuttered as he struggled to regain his voice.

"You will want to help, brother," Thor insisted at his side. "I will explain everything to you on the way."

Natasha sat up in bed beside her sleeping son as she used a dim lamp to read through another book on demonic presence. She sighed as she closed the book and lay down on her side to stare at her sleeping son. At 18 months, he still retained some of his adorable chubbiness, but he was growing so fast…

She was unwilling to let him sleep in his room by himself after the demon episode, so he slept firmly nestled next to his mother.

A knock on her door made her quickly jump up to rush to the door. When she opened it, she saw Thor…and Loki, who stepped from behind his brother. Natasha fainted right where she stood.

Loki rushed forward and caught her in his arms the moment that he saw the color drain from her face. He moved her toward the couch in the living room of her small apartment.

"Did you not prepare her for my coming, you big oaf?" Loki chastised as he brushed his fingers along her forehead. She was even more beautiful than he remembered. It had felt like an eternity since he had seen her last. He leaned in and kissed her lips softly. So sweet and warm, by the nines how he had missed her. "Natalia… Natalia… wake up, my little spider."

Natasha's eyes blinked open as she slowly focused on his face. She reached up and grabbed him, crushing him to her for an embrace that she doubted she'd ever want to end. She placed kisses all over his cheeks and lips as she held his face in her hands, sobbing softly, "Loki? Oh god, you're here? You're really here?"

She didn't give him a chance to answer before she reconnected their lips for another kiss. She had missed him desperately.

A sleepy eyed Thomas slowly toddled around the corner from her room, rubbing his bright blue eyes. His black hair was strewn out of place and he carried his teddy bear.

"Mommy…" he moaned.

Loki's mouth fell open at the sight of the small boy that had entered the room. His ebony hair and dark blue eyes. He was so big. He barely recognized him. "By the All-Father, I can't believe it." The young god stood up and took a step away from Natasha. He didn't want to scare the boy. He would probably want a clear path to his mother. "Hello, Thomas… Natalia, he is beautiful. I can hardly believe my eyes."

Natasha collected herself a little and held her arms out for her son, "C'mere, love…" He ran as fast as his unbalanced body could take him to her arms. He wasn't so certain about the strangely dressed men in the room. She kissed his head and stood up in front of Loki, "Do you know who this is? Look hard, my love…"

His sleepy eyes focused on Loki's face before his face lit up in a shy smile, "Daddy…"

Thomas then quickly buried his face in his mother's neck with a soft giggle. Natasha smiled at Loki with tears in her eyes, "I kept showing him your picture…telling him who you were…"

"I remember that smile," Loki said wistfully as he watched his son hideaway in his mother's curls. He moved his hand toward him but brought it back to his side. He wasn't sure what to do. What his son would be alright with. "Yes, Thomas… I'm Daddy… does your little bear have a name?"

"Cout", he murmured shyly. Natasha laughed softly, "Scout…he can't quite put multiple letter sounds together yet, but we're working on it, aren't we?"

Thomas nodded and lifted his head up slightly, "Daddy pway? He pway?"

Natasha smiled, "Maybe tomorrow, love…it's too late right now. Right now, you have to go back to bed."

"Daddy bed" said Thomas affirmatively. Natasha smiled, "Daddy will come with you to the bedroom…but play tomorrow."

Natasha motioned for Loki to follow her to the bedroom where she lay their son down and stroked his forehead until he fell asleep. She sat on the edge of the bed, staring down at their sleeping boy. She could feel Loki behind her.

Loki extended his arm out cautiously to his son's sleeping form and tucked a strand of hair behind his ear as he rested his chin on his wife's shoulder. "Natalia, I've missed you both so much. He's grown so much… I just want to wrap him up in my arms but he doesn't know me. I'm just a picture with a name." He placed a gentle kiss against her neck. "By the nines, I love you so much, my little spider."

Natasha sniffled softly and closed her eyes, relishing the feel and sound of him near her for a moment before leaning against him and letting out a quiet sob, "I love you so much…oh god, I've missed you…"

She stood up with him and wrapped her arms around him tight as she kissed him lovingly, "I missed you so much…my heart actually aches for you…"

Thor cleared his throat from the doorway, "Perhaps we should discuss the demon…"

"Yes, of course," Loki snipped at the intrusion although he knew that his brother was right. He needed to protect his son that was what was most important. "If it is truly a demon. They are very powerful and they feed off energy. Thomas is half frost giant which means he has ice magic in him and there is a good chance that he has inherited other mystical powers from me even if they haven't manifested themselves yet."

The young god reached for his wife's hand and pressed it to his lips. "I won't let them hurt him, I promise. But it easy to see why he was targeted."

Natasha nodded slowly as she glanced back at him, "I've been too terrified to leave him alone since it happened…" She glanced at Thor, "You can go…we know there's nowhere he can escape to that you won't find him…"

Thor took his leave as Natasha stood in the doorway of her bedroom, "I was so scared when I saw that thing hovering over him. I remember thinking that I couldn't lose him because he's all I have left. He's the only part of you I have left."

Natasha smiled at her son's sleeping form, "He is a lot like you. Always this little look of mischief in his eyes. I'll tell him not to do something be he'll giggle while looking me directly in the eyes…and still do what I told him not to do."

"You know I always imagined that we would get into mischief together," Loki mused as he sat down on the edge of the mattress. "I could see the two of us playing a silly prank on Mommy. When I used to rock him to sleep I thought I had all this time ahead of me and I hardly had any time with him at all." The young god brushed his fingers through his hair before he gazed up at his wife. "You look beautiful, little spider. I just want to sit here and stare at the two of you for as long as I am able."

Natasha held out her hand for him, "Come here…"

When he took her hand, she pulled him to her and kissed him with every ounce of emotion she could muster. She'd missed him so much, she knew she wouldn't be able to stop touching him.

Loki ran his hands up and down her body, relishing in the feel of every curve, kissing her lips with bittersweet fervor. She was heavenly, sweeter than candy. "My beautiful Natalia… I can't believe that I'm actually touching you, little spider."

Natasha whispered against his lips as she clawed at his clothing, "Please…take me…I need you so badly. I missed you so desperately. I need to feel you inside of me again…"

"I want nothing more," Loki gasped as he pulled her down onto the floor as his lips moved along the soft spot behind her ear. He could feel her body shiver, he had almost forgotten how wonderful that felt. His hand moving beneath her shirt to caress her breast. "Do you remember the spell I used to cast, little spider," he whispered against her ear. "He won't be able to see but you need to be quiet."

Natasha nodded as she kissed him hungrily, whispering, "Do it…please do it."

When Loki cast the spell, divesting them of their clothes and cloaking them in invisibility, she wasted no time in climbing atop him and sinking down onto his member. At first, she stayed still, taking a moment to caress his body and relish the feel of him inside of her. She felt complete now.

Loki gasped in pleasure has she sank down on him. His dark green eyes staring up at her adoringly as his hands move to her hips. This was ecstasy. To be one with her again. "Valhalla," he whispered as he moved his hand to the nape of her neck and gently brought her lips to his. "You are my Valhalla." When she started to move, he bit his lip to stifle a groan, arching up into her as they moved together in a perfect rhythm. It was like they had never been apart. He never wanted it to end. He never wanted to leave them again. But he knew that his fate was already sealed and there was no changing it.

Natasha kissed him passionately as she began rolling her hips against him. She stared down into his eyes and, before she knew it, a lone tear streaked down her face.

"Loki…" she whispered as she pressed her forehead against his, "My love…My one and only…you're the only man who will ever touch me like this…I promise you that. I'm yours until my dying breath…whether you're here or at the farthest reaches of the universe. All yours…"

She collapsed against his chest, their breathing labored from their climax, their bodies still joined as she rested her head against his chest. "I wish you never had to move," Loki murmured softly. "When I'm with you it's the only time I ever feel whole, little spider. I'm a shell of myself without you. If not for my horrible choices we could still be together."

Natasha closed her eyes and brushed her lips across his chest before tilting her head up to meet his eyes, "I'm assuming you're only here until you kill the demon who's been after Tommy…"

When he nodded the affirmative, she shut her eyes tight and lay her head back against his chest, "I can't say goodbye to you again. I couldn't survive it. There has to be a way, Loki…cloak yourself or something and we'll runaway together. Just the three of us. We'll go somewhere remote. Please."

"You have no idea how badly I want to," Loki advised as he glided his fingers languidly through her cascading curls. "But is that the life you want for Thomas? The All-Father is intent on making me suffer. He wants me back under that serp…he is not ready to end my punishment. It is not so easy to hide from him."

"What I want for Thomas is for him to know his father. I want him to be able to love and depend on the real you. I want you here to support and help me…I need you. It's so hard being here by myself. I love him, but god…being a single mother is the most exhausting job in the world. I don't have companionship. I don't have time to even get my hair cut."

"I love your hair, little spider, it's so gorgeous and long and curly, just as it is," Loki grinned as he twirled a long strand through his fingers. "If you are really willing to run away with me. There are things that I can do. Ways to mess with Heimdall's vision in certain places. But it can't be permanent. We would have to move often or he could catch on." The young god placed his thumb and forefinger against her chin and tilted her head to look into his eyes. "We will live under the risk of being caught, little spider."

Natasha stared at him with pleading eyes, "if it means having you here with us, it's worth a try. If we have to move every day, I'll do it. You belong with your wife and your son. You belong with your family."

She sighed and relaxed against him, "Or…you could kill the demon but just make everyone believe he's still at large, threatening Tommy…that way, you'd have to stay."

"I don't think Odin is that generous," Loki contemplated. "He doesn't care about Thomas. I was released because of Thor and Frigga's urging's and on the express promise that I would be returned to complete my sufferings which of course are open ended. He will not wait forever to see me back on my tree."

"Your tree?" she inquired, narrowing her eyes. Natasha softly kissed his lips, "What did they do to you, my love?"

She wasn't certain she even wanted to know the answer to that question. Natasha would stay up at night, wondering what tortures Odin had concocted for the young god that she loved. He was immortal…and could endure exponential amounts of pain without dying…she didn't want to think of how painful his punishment was.

"I didn't mean to… " Loki began as he exhaled slowly. He should be more careful with his words. He didn't want to upset her but he didn't want to keep secrets from her either. "It is a mystical place made especially for my punishment. There is a serpent who dwells in it, the poison that drips from its fangs is my penalty." The young god squeezed her tighter as he kissed her softly. "It is not so bad. I am a god, after all."

Natasha closed her eyes tight and shuddered at the thought. She couldn't stop the tears that escaped her eyes. Soon, she was sobbing against him, weeping for him…for herself and for their son.

Soon, they got up and moved to the bed. She scooted close to their son and pulled him down behind her so that they could all lie together. She whispered, "You're not leaving us again…you can't."

Loki lied there with his arms around his wife, his face buried in her strawberry curls as he listened to the soft sounds of her breathing. She was right. There was no way that he was just going to relinquish himself back into Thor's custody. He had spent the last eight months in a constant state of torment. As far as he was concerned his debt had been paid in full. Now that he was with them again there was no way that he was going to let anyone take them from him.

His dark green eyes glanced toward the corner of the room. He could have sworn that he saw something moving in the shadows. The young god stayed perfectly still as he shifted his gaze slightly. He jumped up as the dark hooded figure emerged from the blackened nook of the room.

Loki sent an electrical surge towards the figure who hissed in pain, its cloak falling away slightly so that he could see its glowing yellow eyes and spectral leer. "Laufeyson," it crooned before it disappeared. The demon knew him? How was that possible?

Natasha jerked awake at the sudden movement and brightness of the lights. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms tight around her son and moved behind Loki. Thomas was crying now.

When the demon said his name, she was confused. How did that thing know her husband?

It sneered at Loki and pointed a clawed hand toward Natasha and Thomas, "So you have come back….to protect them…."

Loki stood near frozen to the floor as he gazed in shock at the empty space where the demon had been standing just seconds before. It's eerie words echoing in his mind. The beast knew him. It was not coming here because it had happened upon a child with mystical energy to feed on. It chose Thomas because he was his son. But why?

"I have never seen that thing before," the young god divulged in his silky accent. "But it knew me. It knew me, Natalia, like every other problem in your life… I am its cause." Loki strutted toward the living room as he tried to think. This creature must be working for someone else. He would remember if he had any grudges with a demon. That is not something that one would easily forget. "I wounded it. I need a spell with a bit more power. But next time I will kill it, little spider. I promise you."

Natasha bounced her son on her hip, trying to comfort him. The raucous noise had frightened him. She sat on the couch and gently shushed him as her eyes turned toward Loki, "Don't go getting down on yourself. We don't have time for that. Right now, we need to concentrate on keeping our son safe. If you hadn't been here, who knows what would have happened….should we go to a hotel or what?"

"No, No. I want to kill it. It will come back. Maybe a day or two to recover from its injury but it will come back," Loki rasped. He could feel the anger bubbling up in him. Anger at himself as well as at the beast. He always caused them pain. The young god looked at his son who was crying and clinging to his mother. He moved toward them and knelt down. "Would you like to see a trick, Thomas?" He held out his hand and a little ball of light appeared hovering over his palm and began bouncing up and down, changing colors with each movement.

Thomas's cries slowly faded, and his wet eyes widened in wonderment at the light show before him. Soon, he was smiling and reaching for the ball.

Natasha let out a sigh of relief and kissed her son's head as he moved off of her lap to stand directly in front of Loki to get a better look at the mysterious ball of light.

Loki laughed as he watched his son grinning up at him. All thoughts of demons and his past mistakes long forgotten as he got lost in the boy's sweet smile and tiny giggle. "Put your hand out and it will jump to you," he grinned as he made the rainbow light hop into his son's palm before it bounced up his arm and flew around his head making the child laugh even harder. "Eh heh heh heh… one day you will be able to make your own, little prince." His tongue peeking between his teeth as he chuckled softly. He had missed so much of his life. He wasn't going to miss any more.

Natasha smiled as she watched Loki and Thomas. She hated that Loki had missed so much. Before she knew it, tears had formed in her eyes and she was sniffling. Thomas jumped up and down and clapped his hands.

"Again daddy! Again!" squealed the toddler. She watched as Loki continued performing the same monotonous trick for his son until Thomas fell asleep in his lap.

Loki sat there with his son fast asleep in his arms just staring at him. He ran his fingers gently along his dark black hair. "I still can't get over how much he's changed, little spider. The last time I held him he was.. He couldn't even sit up." The young god looked up at her, his dark green eyes full of earnest. "He seems to like me, don't you think?"

Natasha nodded and slowly moved to his side, taking a seat. She joined him in gingerly stroking their son's hair, "Yes…of course he does. He is so much like you Loki…so bright and smart and full of mischief. He loves you…you didn't need to be here for him to inherit the best parts of you…"

She lowered her eyes, "I am so sorry you missed out on so much…but we will find a way to make sure that you won't miss another moment."

"I don't think he knows me enough to love me but I'll take what I can get," Loki divulged as he smiled down at his little boy. "I made him laugh and that's a wonderful start." The young god looked up at his wife with an impish grin. "And I intend to do the same for you… smiles and laughter all around, my little spider, you'll see. As soon as I get this demon then the three of us will be gone from here. I won't let anyone take me from you again."

Natasha leaned in and kissed him softly, "I love you so much. The pain I felt every day you were gone…I kept imagining what hell you were living through. I wished I could take it away…I felt powerless. I hate that…but you're here now…you're here when we need you most."

"You should try to get some more sleep, little spider." Loki commanded. "I am here and I will watch over you both. Go on and close your eyes, Natalia, you can dream of all the things that we will do together in our future."

Natasha nodded and stretched out on the love seat across from him and Thomas. She fell asleep watching him gently rock their son with a smile on her face.

Loki gently laid his son along the couch and walked into the kitchen. The morning sun was just beginning to peek through the blinds. He began opening up the cabinets and gazing in the refrigerator trying to get a sense of what his son might like for breakfast. He had no idea what his favorite food was, what his favorite anything was, his favorite game, things that he was scared of, and his favorite toy. There was so much that he needed to learn. He was deep in thought when he felt his wife step behind him.

"You have always been so good at sneaking up on me, little spider," He laughed.

Natasha smiled as she wrapped her arms around him from behind. She kissed the side of his neck, "I'm only good at sneaking up on you when you're in deep thought, my love. What's going on in that beautiful mind of yours?"

She leaned close to him, squeezing him tight. She never wanted to let him go.

"I was just thinking that I don't know what he likes for breakfast or dinner or his favorite bedtime story," Loki mused as he turned himself in her arms and leaned in for a kiss. "But now I can't think of anything except how delicious his mother is." He winked.

Natasha laughed as a flattering blush crept over her cheeks, "He loves pancakes with maple syrup and butter. His favorite bed time story is "A Monster at the End of the Book". Sesame Street is his favorite TV show and he loves oranges. He never had so much as a cold, but I think your genes are to thank for that…"

She kissed him and looked up into his eyes, "These are things you will learn. I promise."

"You know I was so distraught over what I did. I didn't trust myself anywhere near you or Thomas. I was glad you fled as much as I missed you." Loki revealed as he caressed her cheek softly, tracing the outline of her bottom lip with his thumb. "I wanted the All-Father to punish me but not for his reasons. As horrible as it might be, I could care less about the strife I caused in Jotunnheim and Asgard or even here. I hated myself for what I did… for hurting you and I wanted to suffer. Natalia, I'm as selfish as I ever was. I haven't really changed at all."

Natasha leaned up and kissed him, "I knew your flaws, just as much as you knew mine when we fell in love. I don't want you to think about the past anymore. What's done is done. I don't want what happened all that time ago to take away any more of our time. Thomas and I need you. Right here…right now."

"The first place we should go is Fiji," Loki grinned as he pulled her in for another kiss. He could never get enough of those luscious lips and he had months and months to make up for. "I'll build Thomas the biggest sand castle ever and I'll make love to you all night long. I know we won't be able to stay for very long but it would be a nice place to start, like a second honeymoon, my little spider." A knock on the door interrupted the moment. The young god's eyes narrowed as he gazed at the wooden obstructions. "I'm sure it's Thor… checking up on me."

Natasha opened the door. Sure enough, it was Thor. Just as she allowed him in, Thomas awoke and began calling for her. She excused herself to get her son dressed for the day before returning to the living room where Thor stood with Loki.

"What were you guys talking about while I've been gone?" Thor inquired.

"Is it really any business of yours," Loki snapped. "Am I required to tell you verbatim every word that I say to her before you return me to your father." The young god pushed past his brother as he returned to the living room. "The demon came again last night. I was able to wound it but I could not kill it." He decided against informing him that the beast knew who he was. He might think that his presence here would do more harm than good if he knew that the demon had sought them out specifically because of their relationship to him. "I need to rework a spell, make it stronger. I will kill it soon enough."

"Don't get any ideas, brother," Thor forewarned. "I know how tempting it must be now that you are with them again but the All-Father will never stand for it if you try to leave with them. Think of them for once and not yourself. A life on the run is no life at all for that little boy. And it will be so much harder on your son if he loses you after getting attached."

"You needn't waste your breath," Loki lied. "I have no plans on making a run for it. Where'd we go? Heimdall see's everything."

Natasha glared at Thor, "You have no idea what's good for our son. You haven't lifted a finger to help him…you haven't even bothered to see him. And you dare call Loki 'brother'. If you were his brother, you would look out for his kid and make sure his wife wasn't barely keeping her head above water when she's a heart broken single mother!"

She felt Loki's hand on her shoulder, but she shook her head, "No! I'm tired of this self-righteous bull—" a downward glance toward her son kept her from outright cursing.

Natasha took a deep breath, "Get out, Thor. You're nothing to anyone here but a warden. I know my time with my husband is limited…his time with Thomas is limited. I'd rather not have it ruined by your presence."

"I'm sorry, Lady Natasha, I asked Heimdall about you often. He has always told me that you were doing well." Thor replied before turning toward his brother. "I wish I could believe you, Loki, but I know you too well for that. After seeing what you have to endure, I do not blame you for not wishing to return but I cannot let you escape."

"I don't care if you believe me or not," Loki bit off irritably. "But you've done your job. You can clearly see that I'm still here and your presence is upsetting my wife so if you don't mind…" He moved towards the door and opened it widely for the thunder god to exit.

"Do the unselfish thing for once," Thor reiterated as he sauntered toward the door. "Protect your son and then let him go. Don't pull him further into your chaos. Remember why you surrendered in the first place, brother, to give him a chance at a happy life. I will check on your progress tomorrow." Loki slammed the door forcefully behind his brother. What did he know about anything? He had no children. The young god turned around and gazed down at his little boy as his mind began to battle within itself. Was it wrong of him to want to be a part of his life now? He didn't want to hurt him but he couldn't bear to be apart from them again.


	19. Chapter 19

Natasha as on the couch as Loki cleaned the dishes she'd dirtied while fixing them breakfast. They had pancakes, Thomas' favorite. She loved that they has the chance to sit down at the breakfast table together. It was so special to her…

She left Thomas sitting on the living room floor with his toys as she moved back to the kitchen to lean against the doorway, "I hope you didn't listen to your brother. Having you here is what we need…"

"There is some truth to his words," Loki admitted as he finished the last dish. He turned off the water but didn't move as his dark green eyes gazed out the window above the sink. "Thomas deserves every happiness, you both do. It is so hard for me to think past what I want. Eight months of Hel does not negate what I am. When I left I was certain that he would be better off without me. What has changed really? I'm still the same monster I always was. I bring chaos wherever I go. How long before something sets me off? If it were Thor, he would walk away without question. I don't love selflessly. I'm possessive and needy and… I want you both to be happy, little spider, but I want you to be happy with me."

Natasha wrapped her arms around her husband, "Then I guess we love the same way because I want you here too. I've missed you so desperately…maybe we shouldn't look at it as loving selfishly. Maybe you're the missing piece of my world and I'm the missing piece of yours…we can't possibly walk around without each other…it's not right. We're incomplete when we're not together…"

"I spent all my life feeling like I didn't belong… like something was missing in me," Loki revealed as he held her closer, burying his face in her strawberry curls. "Until you, Natalia, when I'm with you like this… it's the only time I feel whole… all the noise stops and there's just you." He moved away from her slightly so that he could look into her sweet blue eyes, his fingers brushing tenderly through her hair. "I don't care what I have to do. I won't let anyone take me from you again. I'll never let you go again, little spider. I just can't."

Natasha smiled, "That's what I like to hear…"

Just as she leaned up to kiss him, Thomas entered the kitchen, "Mommy go pway?"

Natasha reluctantly release Loki to kneel down in front of her son, "You want to go play at the park?"

When Thomas nodded, she glanced at Loki, "Do you think your warden would frown on a trip to the playground with Thomas?"

"Probably but I don't care," Loki smirked as he gazed down at the two of them. "If my little prince wants to go to the park than that's what we'll do."

A few minutes later, Natasha sat down on a bench, watching as Loki assisted Thomas down the slide and up through the playhouse. There was no way she was going to let anyone take him away from his family again. This is where he belonged.

After the park, they went to lunch at a small nearby restaurant, then returned back to her apartment for Thomas's nap. She stood at the doorway, watching her son sleep when she felt Loki wrap his arms around her from behind. She closed her eyes and moaned softly, leaning back into him, "I missed your touch so much…"

"I love you… I love being near you," Loki whispered against her throat as he began a trail of suckling kisses until he made his way to the pulse point of her neck. "That right there," he grinned in between kisses. "The way your body shivers beneath my lips… how I missed that, my little spider." He released one arm from her waist and let his hand slide down her thigh as he continued to lavish her neck with kisses before he began nibbling on her ear. "And those sounds you make… you drive me crazy… until I can think of nothing but how badly I want you."

Natasha moaned softly before moving to the wall beside the door, she turned around in her arms and kissed his lips as she pulled him close and raised a leg around his waist.

"Get me out of these clothes…" she whispered against his lips.

"You're wish is my command," Loki grinned widely. His tongue playing against his teeth as he lifted her up and rolled his hips along hers teasingly. "You're the Queen of my heart, little spider." He quickly cast his spells, nearly growling in pleasure as he embedded himself within her. Every time with her was like the very first time. He was never prepared for the incredible sensation that being inside of her brought to him. "Natalia… my beautiful Natalia." Let the All-Father choke on his supposed justice. He was never going to be separated from her again.

When they were sated, they lay on the floor in a boneless heap. She smiled at him as she softly stroked his chest, "No power in all of the realms combined could tear you away from me now. I love you so much, Loki…nothing could ever compare to what I feel for you."

Loki sat on the edge of the bed watching his wife and son sleep. The last two days had been like a dream. One that he refused to let end. He felt the being's presence before he heard any movement. It came toward him swiftly but the young god was much faster wrapping it up in a force field so that it could not dematerialize.

"How do you know me?" Loki spat out as he rounded on the demon. "Who sent you after my son?"

"Who doesn't know the God of treachery and lies?" the eerie beast drawled. "The foul stench of your bloodlines lofts from the boy like a beacon. He would make a very tasty morsel."

"Treachery?" the young god mused as he stared into the beings glowing eyes. "That is one I have not heard before." And with that one word Loki knew exactly who was behind the demon's presence here. "How many more of you were sent to find my child? I know he wouldn't leave it to you alone." The evil entity stared at him defiantly and the trickster knew that he would get no further information from him. He shot the demon with an electrical charge that was twenty times more powerful than the one he had inflicted on him that first night. It cried out in an unnatural voice, bursting into flames as he sent it into oblivion.

The noise had woken his wife and son as he turned to see Natasha comforting their scared little boy. "It's dead… that one won't ever be back."

Natasha clutched her son close and gently rocked the crying child before moving him out to the living room. It took almost an hour to calm him, but when he did quiet down, he fell asleep in his mother's arms. She slowly whispered, "You said…'that one'…will there be more? Why do they want Tommy? How do these beings know you?"

"It was something that he said before I killed him," Loki revealed as he paced slowly around the room. Movement always helped him think better. "He called me the god of treachery and lies. Treachery… to be deceptive… disloyal… to betray. He must know that I released the Avengers on purpose… that I deliberately destroyed his armies. These demons they feed on magic. They can smell it on Thomas like bloodhounds." His dark green eyes stared down at his small boy. "Thanos means to hurt Thomas as payment for my deceits. The Fates only know how many of these demons he has employed in your world to find him."

Natasha tightened her hold on her son as her heart skipped a beat, "Oh god…no. No…Loki…what are we going to do? How can we protect him?"

"I promised you that we would stay together, my little spider, and I will do everything I can to keep that promise," Loki advised as he knelt down in front of them. "These demons… I can kill them.. I am more powerful than they are. We can go on the run like we planned." He reached up and captured a loose curl in his hand, gliding his thumb back and forth along the silky strand. "I can protect him from them. But I am no match for Thanos. If he steps foot anywhere near this world then I will have to take the two of you to Asgard. Do you understand? If it comes to that I will have no choice."

Natasha felt her heart begin to drop, but she nodded anyways. After taking a deep breath, she looked him in his eyes, "When do we leave?"

"We should leave at once," Loki advised as brushed his fingers along the top of his son's head. "Pack a small suitcase of all of his favorite things. The rest we can get new when we arrive. I will take care of you both, little spider, I promise."

Natasha gently laid her son down before going into his room and packing up a small suitcase of clothes, toiletries and his favorite toys. She returned to the living room and nodded, "We're ready."

Loki nodded before he leaned down and gently kissed his son's forehead. "Thomas," he whispered as he attempted to wake up the little boy. He didn't want him to awaken during the enchantment and have no idea what was going on. "Little prince, would you like to go on an adventure?" the young god smiled as his son gazed up at him and rubbed his eyes sleepily. "I want to show you a new trick. You hold on tight to your mommy and I am going to make a rainbow of colors swirl all around us and when they fade away we are going to be some place new… on a beach… do you like to play in the sand, Thomas?"

Thomas furrowed his brows in confusion before laying his head back down on Natasha's chest. She smiled a little and bounced him, "I don't think he knows what sand is…he's never been to a beach."

She tightened her hold on her son before wrapping her free arm around Loki. Within moments, they were on a beach with crystalline waters and sugar white sand.

"This is the beach, little prince," Loki mused as he watched his son take in his new surroundings. "We are going to get a place to stay and then I am going to show you how to build a huge sand castle." The young god ran his fingers along the lush curls that cascaded down her back in soothing motion. He knew she was worried but he was going to make sure they were both safe. He wouldn't let Thanos harm them.

The next day, Natasha slathered copious amounts of sun tan lotion onto her son's body before she let him rush out of their beach front bungalow toward Loki, who was ready to show him how to build a sand castle.

She sat on a lounge chair and smiled, watching them.

Several buckets of water, a pile of sand, and a little bit of magic and their sand castle was complete. Loki had never had more fun. They had spent the entire afternoon playing together on the beach. It was getting near lunchtime as Loki conjured a peeled orange, causing a delighted squeal from his son as they walked back up the beach toward Natasha. He handed him a slice which Thomas gobbled up happily.

"Mmmmh.. yummy," Thomas grinned as he took another slice. "You make dat, daddy?"

"Yes, I did," the young god nodded.

"I do dat, too?" the little boy probed as they reached their bungalow.

"One day, little prince, when you're a little bigger," Loki smiled as he patted his son on the head. "I will show you how to do all sorts of incredible things." His grin grew wider as he gazed down at his wife. "So what do you think of our castle, my little spider?"

"It's fit for a king and his prince!" she said with a soft laugh and a round of applause. "I'm very proud of my boys…you both did wonderfully. I enjoyed watching you two build it!"

Loki sat along the edge of the bed as his son snuggled up under the covers holding his teddy bear tightly in his arms. He opened the book and began to read as he watched Thomas attempt to stifle another yawn. The little boy was fast asleep before he even reached the third page. He turned toward his wife and smiled.

"I'm going to set up a ward around him while he sleeps. It will keep him protected and alert me if anyone comes near it," Loki advised. "What are you thinking, Natalia? Do you still want to do this? I can take you both to Asgard now."

Natasha slowly dropped her arms to her side as a smile came to her face, "I was thinking how…how wonderful it is to see you with your son. I want to try to do this. Thomas needs you."

"You know every time he calls me 'daddy' I feel like my hearts going to burst I'm so happy." Loki revealed as rose from the bed and strutted towards her enclosing her in his arms. "It's something that I never thought I would get to hear. I think we should plan on staying here for a few weeks. Definitely no more than five but maybe sooner." He brushed his lips against the top of her head and he tightened his embrace. "Happy second honeymoon, my little spider." He smiled down at her. "I have very fond memories of Fiji."

Natasha laughed softly and nodded, pulling him into their room before yanking the string on her bikini top. It fell open, revealing her luscious breasts. A mischievous smirk played across her lips as she turned around and sauntered toward the bed, "Hmm…I wonder if those fond memories have anything to do with snorkeling…no, wait…not snorkeling…it was the food, wasn't it? It had to be the food…"

"Wrong on both counts," Loki grinned as he crawled over her, moving his tongue across her nipple as he gently suckled the tortured peak. His fingers swiftly undoing the ties on her bikini bottoms. He trailed his fingers along her thigh as he let his icy touch come to the surface. "My mind is definitely on other things, little spider." He breathed against her skin.

Natasha trembled visibly as her eyes rolled closed, "Good god, I forgot how amazing that feels…all of you…yes…yes my love…"

She ran her hands over his body, "Take on your Jotun form. I want to feel you…my god…I love every bit of you. Every part of you drives me wild."

Loki let his frost giant features take over as he continued to lavish her body with kisses. His clothing dispersed with a quick spell as he slid into the hot, sweet pleasure of her body. The contrast between his cold and her warmth was exquisite. His blood red eyes gazed up into her own as he sank himself into her again and again. "My Natalia… I love you."

Natasha arched her back, pressing her body flush against his as she reveled in the feel of his cold body against the warmth of her own. She shuddered as she kissed him, lovingly whispering his name as he drove her toward a powerful climax.

"Oh my…god…I love you so much."

Loki's breathing was fast and hard as his passion crested. His dark crimson eyes taking in the sight of her gorgeous body as she snuggled at his side. "That's a part of me that is yours alone, something I will never share with anyone but you. I can lie here next to you like this and feel like a man and not a monster. That is the power of your love, my little spider."

Natasha smiled, "All of you belongs to me. I'm selfish…"

She kissed him as she let out a soft sigh, "I don't know how I survived without you, baby. You're as much a part of me as my own heart."

"I feel the same, little spider," Loki advised. "Which is why I refuse to be without you. Eh heh heh heh, we can be selfish together."

Natasha kissed him lovingly before snuggling into his side and falling asleep. The next morning, Thomas woke up early and climbed into their bed. He poked Loki in the nose and whispered, "Daddy. Sun waking up…"

"He wants you to watch the sunrise with him" murmured Natasha from her side of the bed, but she made no move to get up.

Loki sat down on the lounge chair outside of their bungalow and pulled his son up onto his lap as they watched the sunrise. The view of the sand and water reminded him of the shorelines of Asgard. He couldn't help but wonder if Thor had returned to their home realm or if he had been ordered by the All-Father to search for them himself.

"Would you like some pancakes for breakfast, little prince?" the young god asked as he watched Thomas nod vigorously in approval. Loki opened his palm and brought forth a plate of pancakes covered in syrup as his little boy smiled widely.

"Daddy cook fast," Thomas giggled.

Natasha took her time in getting out of bed to join them. She wanted them to have as much time alone together as possible. She smiled widely upon seeing the pancakes he had conjured.

"There some coffee and French toast where that came from?"

"Of course, my little spider. We cannot forget Mommy now can we Thomas?" Loki grinned widely. "Why don't you help me, little prince, point to where it should go." Thomas paused eating for a moment as he looked about before spotting the small wicker stand between the lounge chairs.

"On dat?" Thomas answered as he pointed his finger toward the tiny table. With a flick of his wrist the young god made the food appear as he brushed his lips against his son's temple. "Daddy cook good Mommy."

"So what do my favorite people want to do today?" Loki mused.

Natasha smiled and kissed her husband, "I have a massage scheduled. You two are on your own today."

She ate her breakfast, then kissed her son and husband goodbye before heading to the spa.

After combing the shoreline for seashells and creating another extravagant palace in the sand his little prince decided that he wanted to go to a park. Loki was quite intent on satisfying his every whim as he picked up Thomas and rested him on his shoulders as they walked to the hotel lobby. He moved swiftly toward the clerk behind the counter.

"I need to locate a park…. you know with slides and swings and things of that sort." Loki inquired pointedly.

"You're the last person I expected to see," a voice drawled from behind him. "Isn't fate funny?"

Loki turned around slowly as he tried to rein in his irritation. He had his child to think of but it wasn't easy. He could feel all of the resentment and jealousy bubble up to the surface at the first syllable that the archer had uttered.

"If I were you I'd pretend I didn't see anything," the young god smirked. "You never have been nor will you ever be a match for me."

"Who dat, daddy,?" Thomas inquired curiously from his perch along his shoulders.

Natasha had just walked into the lobby of her hotel when she spotted Clint and Loki standing mere feet away from each other. After her initial shock wore off, she rushed over to stand between the two of them.

"Barton…what are you doing here?" she inquired angrily. Natasha was in no mood for this little run in. She'd finally begun to relax and get used to the idea that they'd be a family. She refused to allow anyone to jeopardize that.

"Shield business, Tasha," Clint remarked coolly. "Looking for an old informant that flew the coop. What are you doing so far from home? I'm going to take a wild guess and say that the big guy here isn't on a work release program."

"What my wife and I do is none of your business, circus boy," Loki snipped as his dark green eyes glared at the smaller man.

"It most definitely is Shield's business," Clint retorted as he took a cellphone out of his pocket. "I think Fury is going to be very interested in hearing that you're back on Earth."

"Do you honestly think I'm going to let you make that phone call?" Loki seethed as he lifted his son off his shoulders and placed him on the ground next to him. "

Natasha snatched the phone from Clint and stepped between her son and the archer. She spoke just loud enough for him to hear, but not loud enough for Thomas.

"Clint, I have felt like I've owed you a debt for years now, but so help me god, if you endanger the happiness of my family, I will kill you with my bare hands.

"After what he did to you, I'm the one you're going to threaten, Tash?" Clint shook his head as stared at the black widow with disappointment in his eyes. Loki didn't like being reminded of what he had done when he was under the scepter's influence. Natasha had forgiven him but he doubted that he would ever be able to forgive himself. "You expect me to just pretend I didn't see the tyrant that enslaved the earth for a couple of years roaming around Fiji? Shield needs to know that he is here."

"I am no threat to Shield as long as they stay away from my family," Loki remarked in an icy tone. "I have no quarrel with your people anymore."

"Yeah, right," Hawkeye chuckled. "And I bet you believe him too don't you? The guy's power hungry and he always will be. He won't play the happy homemaker for long, Tasha, I guarantee you that."

"Clint, he is the father of my child. My son has never laughed or smiled more than he has in these past few days. You and the rest of the self-righteous bastards who call yourselves my friends sit back in judgment, but I have had to walk the road of single parenthood alone and it is hard! I have needed help and no one has so much has come to see me. You failed me as a friend. I was drowning, heartbroken, depressed and struggling with an infant all on my own and where were you?! Nowhere to be found, that's where."

"You know what this life is like, Tash, one mission after another, if I wasn't around when you needed me I'm sorry," Clint entreated. "But do you really want your son to turn out like him? He's a raving lunatic on his best day."

"I think I've had more than enough of your insults," Loki bit off angrily.

"I'll give you three days, Tasha," Hawkeye agreed finally. "I should have found my guy by then. But then I'm telling Shield that he is on earth. I don't care what he says. He's probably got his next scheme in the works already."

"Clint, I swear to god…" she said through gritted teeth before glancing down at her son, who looked like he was getting even more upset by the minute. She picked the boy up and kissed his cheek and pressing his head against her chest, being careful to cover his ears as she did.

"He's in danger and Loki is the only one who can protect him. If Loki is taken away from us, my son ends up in grave danger…and if you're responsible for putting my son's life on the line because you feel you're owed a win for your little pissing match, I will end you in every way imaginable. You know what I'm capable of, Barton…what you don't know is how insane a mother can be if her child is endangered. Trust me…you don't want to poke the mama bear. I know how to kill a man in the slowest, most painful way possible…"

"He's in danger and Loki is the only one who can help him," Clint remarked as he turned his gaze to the god of mischief. "How convenient that is for you."

"Eh heh heh heh," the young god laughed mirthlessly. "Is that your not so subtle way of implying that I'm behind it? Perhaps one day I will have the pleasure of showing you what true torment is really like and then you can tell me just how much scheming you can do while you're in the throes of it. Come, Natalia, you needn't waste your breath. We will be long gone before his little three days are up."

When they put their son down for bed that night, she stared at him for several moments before she felt Loki's hands snake around her waist from behind. She smiled and let out a small contented sigh, "We have to decide where we're going to go next…Christmas is just round the corner…maybe we can go to the Swiss Alps or something."

"Swiss Alps it is," Loki breathed against her neck. "We will leave in the morning. You were quite forceful today. Eh heh heh heh. Remind me not to get on your bad side, my little spider."

Natasha giggled as they moved to their bedroom. She gasped as his frosty touch traced a pattern across her hip bone. She smiled and gently ran a hand through his dark locks, "Have you ever seen a Christmas celebration before?"

"No, I can't say that I have," Loki mused as lifted her top over her head and tossed it to the floor. His fingers tracing the green lace of her bra. "It is truly spectacular?"

Natasha smiled and bit her bottom lip as she nodded, "Well, I can't say I've ever celebrated it traditionally myself…but from what I've seen…it can be truly special and heartwarming. It's usually cold outside…and you put up and decorate a Christmas tree with lights and ornaments…and you cook, bake cookies and sing Christmas carols…and spend time together as a family in front of a fire. Then, the next morning, you exchange gifts. Kids love unwrapping the gifts. Could you imagine the way Tommy's eyes would light up when he unwraps a gift and finds a new toy?"

"We will have to do all those things with him," Loki mused as moved his lips along her shoulder. "Are children the only ones who receive gifts, little spider?" His lips moving slowly up her neck as he pulled her body closer.

Natasha's voice shook as his lips connected to a particularly sensitive spot. She laughed softly as her hands began roaming beneath his shirt, "No…children aren't the only ones. We can exchange gifts if you like."

"It's been far too long since I've given you a present, my little spider," He grinned as he unhooked the clasp of her bra, his lips moving to the soft spot behind her ear as he guided her backwards toward the bed. "I will have to think of something very special for this Christmas."

Natasha giggled as her body arched slightly beneath him so that she could shrug off her bra and toss it across the room. She reached between them and unbuttoned his pants before slipping her hand inside to wrap her fingers around his length.

She watched as his eyes rolled closed and smirked before she began nipping at his ear, "I want to give you a present too…something really special…"

"I'm very easy to please," he groaned at the feel of her fingers caressing his growing arousal. He grabbed the waist band of her pajamas and gliding them down her hips. "But I don't know if I can wait till Christmas, little spider," he grinned as he slid his fingers between her legs.

Natasha whimpered in pleasure as she nipped at his ear, "Oh god…you are so fucking sexy…I don't know how I keep my hands off of you…I love you so much."

She engulfed his lips in a hungry kiss before flipping them over, pushing him onto his back. Natasha straddled him and sank down onto his member before she began eagerly rolling her hips onto him.

Loki's head fell back at the sensation of their joining. "By the nines… Natalia… you feel so good." He grabbed hold of her hips as they moved together in a perfect rhythm. "I swear you were made for me… just for me."

When she collapsed on top of him, panting in the afterglow of her orgasm, she pressed kisses across his chest, "I love you so much…I'd move all nine realms to keep you with me…"

"Eh heh heh heh," Loki smiled as he ran his fingers through the soft red locks that cascading down her back. "The All-Father better be careful… I love you, too, Natalia. I would do anything for you. We make a good team. I've always thought so."

"We do make a good team…so anyone looking to bother our family better watch out, because I will do whatever it takes to preserve my family…" she murmured as she leaned up to kiss his lips.


	20. Chapter 20

The following morning Loki informed Thomas after breakfast that they were going to the Swiss Alps. The little boy quickly helped to pack the small suitcase with all of his favorite things. The young prince was a little sad to go. He had hoped that they could have at least three or four more weeks before they had to travel. But Thomas seemed to be nothing but excited to experience his newest adventure. Loki cast his spell quickly. He didn't really trust the archer to keep his word about waiting the three days and he wasn't taking any chances.

The family of three ended up in a luxurious cabin in the mountain. A week passed, and they obtained a Christmas tree, and Natasha taught both her son and husband how to decorate it. She also introduced them to hot cocoa and decorated cookies.

It was the traditional family Christmas she never had.

Loki lay on the floor with his son gazing at the twinkling lights of the tree in the darkened room. He had to admit that it was quite beautiful and that he was enjoying the Midgardian traditions more than he ever imagined that he would. He glanced up at his wife who was curled up on the couch sipping her hot cocoa.

"He has fallen asleep," the young god smiled.

Natasha smiled and set her mug aside before moving to the floor to lie beside them, "Don't you wish it was like this all of the time? Christmas is the day after tomorrow…we have to get his gifts and wrap them…and I need to figure out what we're going to have for our big holiday dinner. Would you prefer ham, turkey or a duck?"

"Eh heh heh heh, what a delightful problem to have, my little spider," Loki jested as he wrapped his free arm around her while she snuggled at his side. "Everything is so peaceful and simple… yes I wish it was always this way." He leaned in to kiss her cheek softly. "Turkey." He winked as he laid his head back along the rug.

Natasha smiled, "Turkey…with potatoes and macaroni and cheese…and some other things." She laughed softly, "I actually want to cook because that should be half the fun."

The next day, Loki disguised them all in a glamor spell before they headed into town for some last minute Christmas shopping. There was a pleasant buzz in the air as people bustled about. Natasha felt so…normal. She loved it.

"Ooooh, little prince, look at this," Loki grinned as he lifted the small boy up into his arms and walked toward one of the store window. There was a small little town set up underneath the tree in the center of the display. It was complete with little lights for the houses and a train that was buzzing around beneath the branches. He had never seen anything like it. "Eh heh heh heh, look Thomas there are even little people down there." He laughed as his little boy clapped his hands in approval.

Natasha smiled at the little display, "That's so pretty…we should get one for our cabin…"

The family went into the store and purchased some small buildings for the Christmas display at their temporary home. After more shopping in which Loki had to distract Thomas so that he wouldn't see his Christmas presents, they went to the grocery store to buy food for their big dinner.

By the time they returned to the cabin, they were exhausted. Natasha turned on the television and allowed Thomas to watch some of the traditional stop-motion Christmas specials while she recruited Loki to help her in the kitchen. She tasked him with cutting onions as she poured them each a glass of wine, then peeked over his shoulder to check on his progress.

"How's it coming, babe?"

"By the nine's, what are in these things," Loki gaped as he blinked against the sudden stinging in his eyes while he attempted to slice the confounding vegetable. "How can one possibly cut it… are you playing a game with me, little spider?" He felt the tears begin to fall as he pressed his face into his shoulder before setting the knife on the counter. With a flick of his wrist the nasty little food was nothing more than a pile of tiny chopped pieces. He turned his teary gaze toward his wife. "Yes, I cheated." He admitted as he wiped the last of the water from his eyes.

Natasha laughed softly, "Onions are delicious in virtually every savory dish imaginable, but they're awful to cut! I'm sorry, love. I hate cutting them, but that's what they do to everyone!"

She laughed again and handed him a glass of wine as she glanced toward their son, who was watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer while playing with some of his toys.

She then washed off celery and placed it on the cutting board, "This vegetable won't attack you. I promise. After these, I have peppers you need to chop up too."

Loki carried their sleeping son into his bed, placing the wards around him as he did every night before returning to the living room to see his wife beginning to lay out the presents beneath the tree.

"This evening was wonderful, my little spider," the young god smiled as he moved toward her. "Everything was perfect. I can't wait for him to open his presents."

Natasha smiled and nodded in agreement as she moved to wrap another one of Thomas' toys, "I can't wait either. I love this…I want us to be able to do this every year. Spend the holiday together…"

"I want that, too," Loki replied. He had never been happier in his life than being back here with them. But he couldn't forget the threat of Thanos and the All-Father that loomed over them. Even Shield was probably set on locating them now that they were aware of his presence in their realm. He couldn't help but feel like there was time clock running against him. He refused to lose his family again.

Natasha could see the worry in his eyes and pulled him to her for a hung kiss before whispering against his lips, "I have a Christmas present you can unwrap tonight…wait here."

She disappeared for a few moments before returning naked with strategically placed Christmas bows adorning her body. Natasha leaned against the door frame, "Santa…I've been a naughty girl this year…but I was hoping you would still give me a little present…"

Loki moved toward with a wolfish smile until he stood next to her in the doorway. "I have a present for you, little spider," he breathed in his sultry accent as he moved his lips along her jawline, his fingers playing teasingly with the bows along her body. "But first I'm going to unwrap mine," he grinned against her skin as he slowly took them off.

Natasha giggled softly as the last of the bows fell from her body. She did a little twirl, "Congratulations…your gift is successfully unwrapped. Now that you have your new toy…how do you plan on playing with it?"

"What to do..," Loki smirked with a furrowed brow as he let his hands glide along her body, caressing her breasts with light fingers that massaged firmer when she least expected it causing her to gasp. "I'm overrun with ideas, little spider," he teased as he drew her nipple into his mouth, his hands dropping lower as she shifted restlessly at his attentions. "But I think taking you against this wall seems to be the most prevalent," He whispered in her ear as he lifted her legs around his waist, casting his spells quickly and with one powerful thrust entered her.

Natasha gasped loudly as her back arched against the wall. Her hands immediately went to his shoulders, holding tight as he repeatedly drove into her. Her body shivered and trembled against his.

After several moments and several hungry kisses, they reached a powerful, mutual climax that left them shuddering and panting on the floor. She smiled and laughed breathlessly, "Wow…that was the best Christmas present ever…"

"Yes… it was…" Loki smiled between ragged breaths. "But it was… my present… I have something else for you, my little spider." He laid his hand flat out in front of him as a small box appeared in his palm. Natasha smiled as she opened it revealing the golden locket inside with the words 'My little spider' etched on the front. "The man looked at me very oddly when I told him what I wanted," the young god laughed. "There is a picture of me and Thomas engraved inside. Eh heh heh heh, now you can carry us around with you wherever you go." Loki watched as she opened the locket. The words 'I love you' on one side and the image of the two of them on the other. He wanted her to have a something tangible of these past few weeks as a family in case the worst came to pass.

Natasha gasped and quickly put it on, pressing it protectively against her chest before she continued staring at it. Tears had formed in her eyes when she opened it to admire the pictures of her family.

"Loki…this is beautiful…thank you. I love it" she whispered softly before leaning in to kiss him softly. "Wait right here. I'm going to get yours.

She disappeared into the bedroom before returning with a small box. When he opened it, he saw a woven bracelet. Upon closer inspection of the bracelet, he would see that a lock of she and Thomas' hair was woven in the intricate fabric.

Loki placed the bracelet on his wrist as he grinned widely, noticing the lock of his wife and son's hair. "I will never take it off," the young god smiled as he ran his finger back and forth along the fabric. "I still have the lock of hair you gave me. I could never touch it or even look at it but I knew it was in my pocket and somehow it felt like you were near me. Like I wasn't alone." He wrapped his fingers around a strand of her hair, twirling it gently. "I could get lost in these gorgeous locks of yours, my little spider."

Natasha leaned in and kissed him lovingly, "No matter what, you will never be alone. Even if we're not physically together, you will always have Thomas and me in your heart. No one can ever take that away from you."

"I remember the first time that I ever kissed you," Loki divulged as he continued to play with the soft ringlet between his fingers. "You had taunted me about my heritage and I wanted to show you that I was made of more than just ice. It was all over for me after that. You captured my heart and soul with those lips of yours. And you're right, my little spider, no one can take that away from me."

A sexy smile spread across her lips as she settled into his lap, "I remember that well…I knew that I was yours the moment you touched me. No one has ever set me on fire the way you have."

Natasha dragged her tongue across his lips and whispered, "During all those nights when I was alone…crying for you, I'd close my eyes and remember how good you felt against me…inside of me. I'd remember the way you'd play with my hair and kiss my head…or the way you'd hold my hand against your chest and kiss my palm. I missed you so much, remembering the simplest of touches was enough to break my heart and bring me to tears."

She kissed him again, then wiped a stray tear from her cheek before glancing out the window. Natasha smiled, "Thomas is going to love that…it's snowing."

"I've always enjoyed snow," Loki mused as he kissed her temple and rested his hand against her thigh. He loved the feeling of her curled up in his lap. "Thor always complained when it was too cold but I always loved the winter weather. It makes sense now, of course. In Asgard one of the biggest celebrations is the Winter Solstice. The end of the cold and the return of spring. I think I like your Christmas better. It seems to honor Winter instead of wishing it away."

The next morning, they were awoken by the sensation of their toddler clambering into their bed and bouncing atop it, "It's knowing! It's knowing! Santa Claus brought us pwesants!"

Natasha rubbed the sleep out of her eyes as she slowly sat up and pressed a kiss to her son's head, "Six thirty in the morning…Merry Christmas to you too, squirt…"

Thomas bounced on top of his father, "Wakey daddy up!"

"Eh heh heh heh," Loki laughed as he felt his son jump on top of him. "Did your mommy never tell you what happens if you wake me up too early?" He reached out and caught him up in his arms. "I become the tickle monster," he jested as he began tickling him mercilessly, smiling at the sound of his fitful giggles before he relented. With a mischievous glimmer in his eye, he whispered in his son's ear. "Let's get mommy."

Despite her expert training, the only thing Natasha could do in defense of her two tickle monsters was curl up in a ball and squeal as she attempted to squirm away from them.

Finally, she managed to slip from beneath their tickling hands and laughed, "Race you to the presents!"

She ran out into the living room and plopped down on her knees in front of the tree as Thomas ran behind her, practically flying into her arms. Loki followed soon after, feigning exhaustion as he sat down beside them on the floor.

"It's far too early," Loki teased as he watched his son bounce excitedly in his mother's lap. "I believe there's a law somewhere that you're not allowed to open presents before 9 am. Hmmm… I don't know I guess it wouldn't hurt to open a few." The young god winked as he picked up a gift and placed in his son's tiny hands.

Thomas was practically vibrating in excitement as he thanked his father for the gift and tore into the paper, shreds of the decorate wrapping flying everywhere. He hopped up from Natasha's lap and jumped up and down, "A twuck! A twuck!"

Natasha was smiling so hard, her cheeks were almost hurting. She grabbed the camera off the nearby coffee table and began snapping pictures, then recorded some video, "Alright, Thomas…now on to your next gift."

The presents were all opened as Loki laid along the floor playing with Thomas and his new toys while Natasha moved about the room picking up discarded wrapping paper. He was amazed at the energy his son still had after waking up so early. He reminded him so much of himself when he was a little boy. "Come play with the trains with us Mommy," he winked as Natasha moved about the living room and Thomas chimed in agreement.

Natasha laughed and dropped the wrapping paper, happy to give into her husband's request as she sat down and began playing with them. Soon, Thomas' adrenaline faded, and he fell asleep on the floor, clutching his new truck against his chest. Natasha yawned as she lay beside her son, then smiled as she felt Loki lay behind her.

"Merry Christmas", she whispered before falling asleep for a brief power nap. Soon, she'd have to wake up to cook their Christmas dinner.

That evening they put their son to bed, he was fast asleep the moment that his head hit the pillow. Loki placed his new toy truck along the nightstand at his side. Before moving back into the living room. He reached out and grabbed his wife's hand, pulling her to him as he used his magic to start the radio. He pressed his forehead against hers as they began to sway to the music. "Merry Christmas, my little spider," he beamed before he froze suddenly.

Rushing back into his son's room as he felt the pulse shoot through his body that meant someone had touched one of his wards. The beast turned on him angrily the moment that he opened the door. Obviously, it was furious. Not only that it couldn't pass the ward but because of the injury to his hand that touching the shield had caused the demon.

Loki wasted no time in destroying the creature in front of him but not before the demon had released an attack of its own causing the young god to hiss in pain as the bolt of electricity shot into his shoulder. He placed his hand against his wound as he watched the demon disintegrate into nothingness.

Natasha rushed in behind Loki, going straight to Thomas and picking him up, cradling him tight against her chest. She turned her gaze to Loki, "You're hurt! Are you going to be ok?"

Thomas continued to cry as he clutched at his mother. She kissed his head and rocked him, "It's going to be alright…its ok. We're right here…daddy won't let anything happen to you."

"Daddy kill monstaw?" asked their son with wet eyes.

Natasha nodded, "Yes, sweetie…daddy kills monsters."

"I'm alright," Loki disclosed as he moved his hand gingerly away from his shoulder. "It's just a slight burn." He moved toward the mattress, settling himself down next to them as he leaned back against the headboard of the bed. "It's alright, Thomas. Would you like me to tell you a bed time story?"

Thomas nodded and sniffled as he wiped at his wet eyes, "Daddy hut?"

Natasha smiled slightly at her little boy. He was such a sweet child. Even in his frightened state, he was still able to express genuine concern for those around him.

As Thomas curled into his father's uninjured side, Natasha got a first aid kit and slowly cut away at the burnt clothing on Loki's shoulder before gingerly cleaning and placing aloe on the burn. She bandaged it up as Loki told his story.

"Once upon a time," Loki began as he ran his fingers along his son's ebony locks. "There was this prince who lived in a faraway land. One day in the midst of a battle he discovered to his shock and the shock of all around him that he wasn't a prince at all but an ice dragon. A very rare type of monster. He was so distraught at the knowledge that he went on a rampage through the kingdom until he was finally caught and locked away. One day he heard the sounds of a beautiful princess Natalia and her tiny little prince Thomas from another kingdom very distant from his."

"Like me and mommy," Thomas smiled with a tiny yawn falling from his lips as he snuggled against his father.

"Yes, like you and mommy," the young god mused. "They were sad and lonely and scared. There were these evil creatures that wouldn't leave them alone. So the Ice dragon broke free from his chains and flew to their aid. The little prince and the gorgeous princess gave him a great big hug as they thanked him and for the first time since he had discovered his true self, he didn't mind being a dragon any more. Because he knew that he could protect them much better as he was than if he were just an ordinary man and he wasn't alone anymore. So they climbed on his back and he flew them away to see all the sights that the worlds had to offer and he still protects them to this day.

His dark green eyes took in the sight of his son fast asleep at his side as he brushed his fingers along his hair one more. "We needn't leave right away," Loki advised as he continued to stare at his child. "The wards do their job and I don't think they are working together. These demons each want to be the one to locate him first. We'll keep to our original plans. A few more weeks and then we'll go."

Natasha smiled and sat on the opposite side of the bed as she leaned over and brushed a stray strand of hair off her husband's forehead. She nodded, "Alright, love…"

She smiled and whispered, "You're a wonderful father…and I'm very proud of you, my love. Thomas loves you so much…and even though you missed out time with him, it's as though you two have never missed a beat…"

"He's such a sweet little boy," Loki mused as he gazed at his son. "I want to do right by him. I won't let anyone hurt him, Natalia, I promise."

Natasha leaned in to kiss her husband lovingly on the lips, "I know…I trust you, my love."

She fell asleep in the bed with her son and husband that night, her arm draped across her son so that she could keep a hand on Loki's leg.

They spent the new year in the cabin, but a few weeks later, began to contemplate their next destination. Natasha stared at a globe and slowly spun it, wondering where they should go next. When he heard her husband approach, she smiled at him over her shoulder, "Any ideas?"

"Why don't we let Thomas decide," Loki smiled as he placed a kiss against her shoulder. He took the globe and knelt down as his son approached. "Here, little prince," the young god remarked as he gave the globe a big spin. "Close your eyes and then place your finger on the globe and wherever you are pointing to that is where we will go."

Natasha watched as Thomas closed his eyes in concentration and placed his tiny finger on France. She raised a brow and smiled, "Great job, big boy! France it is…but I suggest the countryside. Tours, maybe."


	21. Chapter 21

They settled into a little villa in the French countryside. Thomas took to it right away. The little boy had an adventurous spirit and loved checking out the sights around their new home. Loki watched his son as he maneuvered his truck around the hard wood floors of the dining room. His fingers absently stroking the bracelet that adorned his wrist. He had a strange feeling all morning that he couldn't shake. He knew that they were hidden from Heimdall but what about the others. If Shield located them and informed Thor.

The young god sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. There was no sense in worrying over things that he couldn't control. But that was easier said than done. Loki's mind was always working and sometimes that could be more of hindrance than a help especially when his thoughts began to jumble together. Even more so when he began to feel cornered. The clock was ticking and the noise of it was beginning to become overwhelming.

Natasha moved into the room and smiled at her son, "Come on, big boy. Lunch time…"

She set a plate of fruit, cheese, bread and meat slices on the table for Thomas as he rushed into the kitchen and climbed the step ladder to wash his hands, then sat down on the kitchen table to eat.

Natasha turned her attention back to Loki and kissed his temple, "Something's on your mind…talk to me, love."

"I keep thinking that I've missed something," Loki advised as he continued to move his fingers along the bracelet wistfully. "Some way that Shield or Thor could locate us. I don't know. I've been concentrating so much on the others and Heimdall. I just don't want to make any mistakes."

Natasha glanced at their son and knelt down beside her husband as she placed a reassuring hand on his knee, "You're worrying me now, babe…your instincts are the beat out of anyone I know, so if you feel at something's not right…something's not right. Do you think we need to go?"

"No… No… I don't want to move him away so soon," Loki advised as he gazed up into her dark blue eyes. "I don't mean to worry you. It is not as if I cannot handle Thor if he comes. It's my magic… those demons they can feel it, in me and in our son. They track it like dogs. What about SHIELD? Do they have any way of detecting mystical energy that you know of?"

Natasha sat on his lap and pursed her lips in deep thought, "Not that I know of…but Fury has a way of keeping people in the dark, even if they work for him."

"There's nothing I can do about it really," Loki remarked as he rested his hand against her thigh. "I need to use magic to cast the wards and keep us hidden from Heimdall. I just think we should be on the lookout for anything suspicious. If you notice anyone or anything that gives you pause when we are out. Let me know." He ran his fingers back and forth along the fabric of her jeans as his eyebrows furrowed thoughtfully before he gazed up into her sapphire eyes and smiled. "Everything always feels so much better when you're near me," he mused. "I'm not sure how you do that, my little spider, but thank you.

Natasha smiled and leaned down to kiss his lips, "It's what I'm here for, my love. To bring you comfort in your time of trouble…have I told you today how desperately in love with you I am?"

She prayed that he was just being paranoid. She refused to even acknowledge the possibility that SHIELD could locate them. There was no way…was there? She could only pray.

"Eh heh heh heh, not since this morning," Loki grinned as he twisted his fingers along a lock of her hair. "It's been a few hours actually. Eh heh heh heh much, much too long for me."

Natasha leaned in to kiss him again, but she was interrupted by a tiny voice, "Mommy! I finished!"

She slowly stood up and moved toward her son, picking him up and wiping his hands with a towel, "Do you want daddy to put you down for your nap?"

Thomas nodded his head and reached for his father. When Loki took him from her, she quickly cleared off the table and rushed to the bedroom, undressing and laying across their bed, waiting for him to enter.

Loki picked up his son and carried him to his room. Thomas scrambled up into his bed as his father tucked him in. "Let's not forget Scout," the young god mused as he reached along the floor to pick up the teddy bear and placed it in his son's arms. "Bears need to take naps, too."

"I wuv you, daddy," Thomas chirped with a sleepy grin. The young god smiled widely. It was the first time he had ever told him that. He could feel the emotion welling up in his eyes as gazed down at his little boy.

Loki sat down on the edge of the mattress, leaning in to kiss him softly. "I love you, too, little prince." He watched as his eyelids grew heavier and heavier before he set up the wards and left the room. At first, he was surprised that Natasha was not in the living room but then a wicked smirk fell upon his features as he made his way toward their bedroom.

Loki opened the door and closed it behind him softly as he took in the sight of his wife lying along their bed. "Look what I've found in my bed," he drawled huskily. He licked his lips expectantly as he moved closer, crawling over her like a panther, his lips grazing across her skin as he made a path up her body until he was staring down into her dark blue eyes. "I think I'm beginning to really love nap time, little spider."

Natasha smirked as she stretched languidly beneath him, laying fully against her back as her hands roamed over his clothed body. She pressed a hungry kiss to his lips and moaned, "Oh, nap time is the best…"

She playfully grasped his shirt and ripped it open, sending buttons ricocheting in every direction as she trailed kisses up and down his neck, "How do you turn me on so much after all this time? It's amazing…I've never wanted anyone as much as I want you. My body aches for you when you're not inside of me.."

"I remember the first time I ever touched you," Loki breathed slowly as he circled her rosy tip with his thumb before capturing it between his lips. "By the nines, how I wanted you but you made me wait." He moved his lips languidly to her other eager breast. "It felt like an eternity before you let me have you. I yearned for you so badly… to make you mine… that is all I've ever wanted since the first time I saw you… to make you mine."

With no more than a quick thought he rid himself of his remaining clothes as he claimed her in one swift motion. His breath caught in his throat at the sensation that came over him as he filled her. It was so easy to lose himself in her. The pleasure was so exquisite it was almost painful as he felt her nails pressing into his shoulders and gliding down his back.

By some miracle, Natasha was able to form coherent sentences between moans and gasping breaths as her hips thrust upwards to meet his movements.

"I'm yours, my love…since the moment you kissed me in that cell, I belonged to you…I'll never belong to another. My heart…and my body will always belong to you…oh god, harder…please, my love…"

Loki ground his body into hers pounding into her with a primal rhythm as she thrashed beneath him. Sucking in lungful's of air as their bodies moved together. The clenching spasm of her body was too much as the explosion of feeling came over him. "My little spider… you're everything… everything."

The next morning, the family went to the town's open air market for some fresh produce. Natasha smiled up at her son as he sat upon his father's shoulders, then went about shopping. Suddenly, an uneasy feeling settled over her, causing her to glance behind her.

She immediately spotted a man wearing a black leather coat. Her instincts told her that he was a SHIELD operative, and it caused her to perform a quick appraisal of her surroundings. Two to their back, one straight ahead, two on each side.

Natasha leaned in and whispered to her husband, picking up an artichoke to pretend to present to him, "We've got company."

Loki didn't need to ask for any further information from her as he took hold of her hand and magically brought them back to their villa, bystanders be damned.

"Daddy no more shop?" Thomas puzzled as he lifted him from his shoulders and set him on the floor.

"No, Thomas, no more shopping," the young god advised calmly. He didn't want to worry his son. "You go get scout… we are going somewhere new today." He watched as Thomas skipped off to his room before turning to his wife. "Help him grab his things, little spider. We should assume they already know about this place. The faster we are gone, the better."

Natasha nodded and rushed into the bedroom, immediately going to work, grabbing essentials and tossing them into the duffle bag she kept in the corner for emergencies just like this, "Let's play a game, ok? I want you to see how fast you can put your clothes in this bag, ok? Help mommy."

She began tossing his things in the bag before she glanced out the window, spotting the shadow of an approaching figure.

Natasha grabbed Thomas and his bag and met Loki in the living room, "They're here…"

No sooner had the words left his wife's lips when the door burst open and he felt an electrical current smash him in the back, sending him crashing into the wall on the far side of the room. Loki shook his head for a moment as he tried to recover his equilibrium.

He stood as quickly as he was able. His dark green eyes falling upon his wife who was holding their son. She was surrounded by Shield Agents but they weren't the one's that struck him. The young god's gaze narrowed in vexation as he stared at his brother with mjolnir in hand.

"Well if it isn't Odin's little lap dog," Loki seethed as he glanced back over to his wife. There was no way for them to leave if he couldn't reach them and the agents had her and Thomas encircled. "You couldn't just let me go? What have I done to your precious little Midgard since my departure? Nothing."

"The All-Father wants you in Asgard," Thor replied solemnly. "His word is law. I have no choice, brother."

"I don't care what he wants. I'm not going anywhere with you," Loki frothed. "I'm leaving here with my family and I don't care what I have to do to you and your little mortal friends to make that happen."

It was then that Loki felt the faint shake along the ground and the distant rumble like a train getting louder as the tremors got bigger. He knew what it meant. "You brought him with you," Loki fumed. "You led him right to me." He couldn't protect them against the Titan. There was no way.

Natasha was clutching their crying son tight to her chest, covering his face and ears as his small voice screamed "daddy!". He'd seen Thor attack him. That filled Natasha with a sense of rage she'd never known before.

She glared at Thor, "You…you attack a father directly in front of his child!? You think you're better than him…you're nothing. You're a bully. A self-righteous bully…"

When the tremors started, Natasha's eyes connected with Loki, and when he spoke, she knew exactly who "him" was…

"Thanos", she breathed as she held Thomas tighter to her chest. Suddenly, all of the windows in the cabin blew out, knocking everyone off their feet. Natasha clutched her son to her, protecting him from the debris as she screamed for Loki, whose hands found hers through the dust and debris.

"Loki!" she cried as Thomas sobbed from his place against her chest. "It will be alright, baby…mommy and daddy are here. We're here" she soothed…unsure if these would be the last words her son ever heard her say.

The moment that the explosion hit Loki could think of only one thing. Getting to his family. He scrambled across the debris as he reached out for her. If he could just touch her than he could take them to safety. The sound of Chitauri could be heard outside and the deep rumble of Thanos as he called his name tauntingly. The room began to shake again as his fingers finally reached his wife.

Loki grasped Natasha's hand tightly just as the front wall was blown to pieces. Thanos stood in the gaping hole that was once the front of their villa, a grotesque smile spreading across his lips. But in that instant they were gone as the young god cast his spell bringing them into the throne room of Asgard.

He wrapped his arms around them as he kissed them feverishly. "It's alright, little prince, it's alright, you and your mommy are safe. No monsters can come here. No more monsters."

It took her a moment to realize that they had escaped and not died. She first glanced down at her son, who was covered in dust, but otherwise ok. She had blood tickling down the side of her head from where the jagged edge of a rock had caught her, but she was fine. Natasha kissed her husband desperately, breathing a sigh of relief that was short lived as guards surrounded them.

It was then that she realized exactly where Loki had taken them. They were in Asgard…and her husband faced certain torture and imprisonment. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes, "No…no…Loki…"

The guards came forward and took a hold of his arms as she kissed him. He leaned down to breath in Thomas' scent before kissing his head and getting drug away from them, "Please don't…"

Odin entered the throne room, causing Natasha's head to snap upwards, "You're Odin…you can pardon him. Please. For my sake…or my child's sake, please…please. This is the only family we've both ever known…please."

Natasha dropped to her knees as her trembling son clung to her and reached a small hand out, "Daddy…"

"Loki!" Frigga cried out as she rushed into the throne room. "You can't possibly be planning on dragging him away there this instant. Look at him. He is injured." She grazed her fingers tenderly along the scrape that adorned his forehead.

"Justice demands that he fulfills his punishment," Odin remarked stoically.

"He has suffered so much already. Eight months in that place," His mother entreated. "How much more must he endure?"

"Forget it," Loki broke in as his dark green eyes gazed at his mother. "Don't waste your breath. Just promise me that you will take care of my wife and son. That they can have sanctuary here. Please, promise me this. It's all that matters to me."

"Of course, my son, of course. I swear it," Frigga answered soothingly. "Your family is safe here always." His mother turned her attentions back to the All-Father as she began to plead once more. "Please… he has paid his debt. Can't you see how he's changed."

"You are thinking like a mother," the All-Father revealed. "I must think like a King. This man shows no regret for what he did to Jotunnheim, to Midgard, to the bi-frost. If given the choice he would do it again. Am I wrong, Loki?"

"I have one regret in my life," Loki drawled as his emerald eyes moved toward his wife. "And I was forgiven for that.." The faintest of smiles grazed his lips as he took in the sight of her one last time before turning back to the All-Father. "So, no I wouldn't change anything because if I did I might have never met her. Now, please just take me there already. The longer I'm here the more upsetting it is for my son."

Odin nodded to the guards as they pulled him out of the chamber while the All-Father followed behind to deliver him to his punishment.

"I love you! I'm going to fix this! I promise!" she called after him before leaning down to press a kiss against her son's head in an effort to comfort him. The doors closed behind Odin with a resounding slam. Natasha hadn't cared for the Allfather before…and right now, she hated him. Frigga placed a gentle hand on her arm and helped her to her feet as she smiled sweetly at the boy, "Hello Thomas…it's so wonderful to meet you, my dear…you look very much like your father when he was your age. Would you like to see some of his toys?"

Thomas, who was still afraid from his traumatic experiences, cautiously nodded, but continued to hold tight to his mother.

It took nearly 48 hours for him to be able to let go of Natasha for more than two seconds. She felt as though she was in a daze…Loki was gone…again. She couldn't accept it. He wouldn't.

Days turned into weeks…and Thomas began to grow very attached to Frigga. The just queen, true to her word, had assumed personal responsibility for looking after Natasha and Thomas.

While Thomas played in the garden, Natasha watched him, idly stroking the petal of a rose. Frigga sat down beside her, "You truly do love him…"

Natasha nodded, "To the end of all nine realms and back…where did they take him? Please…I need to at least see him…"

Frigga hesitated, "I do not believe you wish to see him in his current state, my dear…" The queen saw the despondent look in Natasha's eyes and placed a gentle hand on her back, "He is just beyond the borders of a city, locked in an enchanted garden that Odin created with his powers…the road to get there is treacherous…but not impossible."

Loki was pulled along the garden as they reached the large oak tree. The young god tried to steel himself for what he knew was coming as the guards wrapped his arms around the oak and placed the bindings upon his wrists. He could still feel the bracelet that his wife had given him against his skin and he tried to concentrate on the sensation of it as the unbreakable chains were placed around his waist and neck.

The serpent was slithering above him as the chains around his neck were tightened putting him in the perfect position to receive his first drop. He blinked once as he watched the snake slither closer. He knew it would start any second and then it would never stop.

He envisioned the two of them on Christmas morning. Thomas sitting in her lap, grinning from ear to ear as he opened his first present. The beautiful smile that had lit up his wife's features. He tried to hold onto that picture as the first drop fell from the beasts fangs. If he could just hang on to their memory, he could endure anything. The poisonous liquid fell into his eyes as a guttural howl pervaded his lips while the agony engulfed his entire being.

A part of her was missing…she could practically feel his pain and sorrow. She wouldn't leave her husband to his fate. That night, Natasha tucked her son into bed, pressing kisses to his head, "Frigga is going to look after you for a few days, alright big boy? You'll be good, right?" When he nodded, Natasha smiled and leaned forward to press another kiss to his head, "I love you…"

When darkness fell over the palace, Natasha packed a nap sack and a map Frigga had given her before slipping from the palace sight unseen. Natasha had to walk for nearly 30 hours straight before she found her way to the enchanted garden where Loki was. When her eyes fell on his form, she gasped and rushed over to him. She had remembered what he'd told her about his punishment, but actually seeing it was horrific.

She reached in front of his face to try to shield him from the venom, but it burned her hands, so she began desperately attempting to free him. The bonds wouldn't budge one bit.

"Loki…Loki…I'm here…I'm here. Can you hear me?"

The place wasn't a 'garden' at all. It was ruins…filled with plants and terrifying-looking creatures. She watched helplessly as the acid-like venom continued to drip onto his face.

Natasha looked around the ruins and spotted a bowl before rushing over and holding it out above his face. She had tears in her eyes by now, "Oh god…how could he do this to you?"

For the barest of moments Loki thought that he had heard her voice but the pain permeating through his limbs was too much for him to grasp a coherent thought. The drops came quickly, one after another, giving hardly a second's breath between agonizing convulsions. Then abruptly it stopped as the young god sucked in a fitful breath. His vision blurred as he attempted to discern the image above him. There was a bowl being held over him as his eyes began to gain focus. The hands that held it, her hands.

"Natalia?' Loki murmured as he tried to find his voice. The chains preventing him from moving even the slightest. Was he dreaming? Had he finally passed out from the pain? "Natalia? Little Spider, are you really here?" The young prince's thoughts became more focused as he noticed the burn along the back of her hand. He could hear her voice clearly and he knew instantly that he wasn't dreaming. "What are you doing here? You have to get out of here. If the All-Father saw you… please go."

Natasha adamantly shook her head, "I can't leave you again. There's no way I can allow you to suffer alone like this. I'm not leaving you…."

She heard his pleas, but refused to listen. After hours of him begging her to go, she had to empty the bowl out, which had become full of the snake's venom.

Quickly, Natasha emptied it and placed it back over his face, "I'll stand here until the day I die if I have to…"

"Natalia, you can't," Loki gasped as the pain began to fade once more. "You can't stay here… Thomas needs you, little spider. I love you so much but you have to go… look, how many times have you burned yourself already." He attempted to struggle from his bonds once more but it was futile. "I can't get free… It's useless… and you can't stay…" The young god couldn't even imagine how angry the All-Father would be if he found her. Heimdall could be informing him any second. He saw everything. "It's not as bad as it looks… I swear… I can handle it, little spider, but I wouldn't be able to stand it if you got in trouble because of me. Stop being so stubborn. Please, Natalia… before the All-Father comes."

Natasha shook her head as tears streamed down her face, "I'm sorry…but I'm not leaving you. I can't let you suffer alone like this. I'm never going to turn my back on you. This is what families do…real families…I love you too much. I'm not afraid of Heimdall, or Odin, or this damn snake…I'm afraid of losing you again. I can't live through that pain again. I won't survive it. I need you…even if it's just like this…I'll spend the rest of my mortal life like this if I have to…Thomas will understand. Frigga is taking good care of him…"

She shielded him from the snake's venom, dutifully standing there for 36 hours straight, emptying out the bowl every few hours, then replacing it above his head. Bags had formed under her eyes, and every time she turned to empty the bowl, her form shook slightly from hunger and exhaustion, but she remained steady enough to protect him from the venom that dripped from above. Natasha Romanoff was nothing if not determined. She wouldn't stop…

Loki knew that there was nothing he could say to deter her as the hours passed but he continued to try as futile as it was. He could see her hands trembling above him as she held the bowl. Her body could not withstand much more. She needed rest. "By the nines, you're so stubborn. Why must you be so stubborn. You need to rest. You need to eat." He struggled against the bond around his throat in an attempt to look at her as useless as it was. He could only see above him, her hands and the bowl. "I belong here. You don't. Please, Natalia, I don't want you to suffer for my mistakes… Please put down the bowl."

Abruptly, his head fell forward as he felt the sudden lightening of his bonds, his arms falling away from the tree to rest at his sides. He was confused as he gazed down at his hands before his dark green eyes turned toward his wife. "I don't understand."

"I'm releasing you." The All-Father announced from his place a few feet away from them. "I declare your debt paid in full."

Natasha could hardly believe her eyes. She was delirious with exhaustion, hunger and the ache in her arms from where she'd been holding the bowl for hours. When Odin's words finally registered with her, she watched Loki struggle to his feet with a faint smile on her face as she dropped the bowl. She turned her head toward the All-Father and whispered a weak "thank you" as she forced her heavy legs to move toward her husband's arms.

She took a few shaky steps toward him, collapsing into his arms as she immediately fell unconscious.

Natasha was pale and gaunt and her limbs were still shaking as she released the bowl and took a step toward him before she fainted. Loki caught his wife up in his arms as he held her closely, pressing his lips firmly against the top of her head before raising his eyes back to the All-Father.

"You're letting me go?" Loki questioned in bewilderment. "But.. why? You said…"

"I think your family has suffered enough," Odin interrupted. "I have never seen a woman more devoted or in love. Nor did I expect to see the same sentiments in you for her. You reminded me of the boy I once knew. Go be with your family, son."

The All-Father instructed his guards to help them into the carriage that would return them to the palace. The young god held her tightly, feathering her face with kisses as they made their journey. As they neared the castle her eyelids began to flutter. Loki smiled as he tucked a loose curl behind her ear. "Natalia.. my little spider… I love you," he whispered as he kissed her lips softly. 

Natasha woke up hours later in a large bed in the palace. She felt better, but she was starving and thirsty. She slowly looked around, smiling when she realized that Loki was sitting beside her, holding her hand.

"I thought I dreamed it…I thought I dreamed that you were set free…this is real, right?" she whispered, her voice cracking from disuse.

"Yes, my little spider, it's real, I'm here and I'm not going anywhere.. never again," Loki assured her as he squeezed her hand tighter, leaning in to give her a gentle kiss along her sweet, pink lips. He was so grateful to see the color beginning to return to her cheeks. "Here eat something. You must be starving." He took a pear from the large bowl of fruit beside her bed and handed it to her before moving to pour her a glass of water. He sat back down at her side, holding the cup to her lips as she took a sip. "You foolish, foolish woman… you could have killed yourself. And then where would I be?" Loki admonished with a slight smile along his lips as he leaned down and kissed her forehead before twisting a loose curl of her hair between his fingers. Twirling it playfully as he watched her take a tentative bite of fruit.

Natasha slowly ate and drank until the dizziness and queasiness faded from her system. With his help, she sat up when Frigga brought Thomas in, who was ecstatic to have his parents back together again.

A few days later, Natasha had fully recovered. She lay down beside her husband, smiling after they put Thomas to bed, "I would have stood there forever…you're my life, Loki…"

She snuggled into his side, "I could never lose you…"

Loki tangled his long, slender fingers into her lush red curls as they fell across her shoulder. His smile deepened as he gazed into her sapphire eyes.

"My Natalia, my beautiful little spider," he breathed in his sultry accent. "I'll never be away from you again." He moved his lips languidly over hers, enjoying the sensations that her nearness sent pulsing throughout his body. A sense of peace seemed to wash over him. For the first time that he could ever remember he did not fear losing her in the slightest. No disquieting voices whispering in the back of his mind that she might leave him, that she would come to her senses and run from the monster that he was. She was his and she always would be.

He moved his lips along her jawline as he slowly made a trail toward the soft spot behind her ear, smiling against her skin as she moaned softly at his actions. "My beautiful wife," he whispered again. "I fall more in love with you every second."

"I love you so much….I'm yours and you're mine. Forever", she kissed him passionately, but the sudden arrival of a toddler running full speed into the room and jumping onto the bed between them.

Natasha laughed, "Squirt! What are you doing up so late?"

"Daddy no leave again?"

She drew her son into her arms and kissed his head, smiling at Loki over their son, "Daddy's not going anywhere…he's right here with us."

"That is right… you are both stuck with me from now on," Loki grinned as he brushed his fingers along his son's ebony locks. "This is where I grew up, little prince. I am going to show you all my favorite places when I was a little boy and all my favorite tricks." The young god beamed as he leaned back against the pillows and gazed lovingly at his family. "I can't wait to show you everything… to show you both."

Natasha laughed as Thomas jumped into Loki's lap, "Just what I need…the god of mischief training our son to play all of his favorite tricks. I guess I have my work cut out for me…"

The next night, Natasha finally got their son to sleep after an excitingly of exploration and mischief. She returned to their room and drew a warm bath before undressing and inviting her husband in with her.

She lay back against his chest in the warm water, threading her fingers in his, "Is there anything else you want, my love? Anything I can give you?"

"I can honestly say that I want for nothing, my little spider," Loki divulged as he kissed her shoulder tenderly, enjoying the feel of her hands entwined with his, her body pressed against him. Yes, he had everything he could ever need. "Which is saying a lot for someone who wasted so much time obsessing over needless things. I have you and Thomas. And there is no more threat to your safety. I yearn for nothing more than that." He placed a soft kiss against her temple as he grinned widely. "What about you, little spider? Is there anything you've always wanted? Anything I can indulge my beautiful wife in?"

Natasha sighed wistfully as a slow smile spread across her face, "I almost…keyword being ALMOST…wish we could have had a little girl too. Give Tommy a sibling to play with, but I know that's impossible now…but I'm perfectly happy. Perfectly content and completely in love with my family. I love you both so much…"

"A little red-headed girl whose as stubborn as a mule," Loki jested as he moved his hand to caress her thigh beneath the water. "I'm happy with our family, too, my little spider. More than happy… Tell me. How do you like it here in Asgard, do you miss your world?"

"I think it's beautiful, but I'd be happy anywhere as long as I'm with you and Thomas" she murmured, turning her head to the side to gently kiss his lips.

The kiss soon grew more heated as she turned around in the water to straddle his lap.

Loki gazed up into her sapphire eyes as she rolled her hips teasingly against him before she eased herself down onto him. "Valhalla," he sighed as she began to move in fine, subtle circling movements. He closed his eyes as the sensation intensified.

"I love you", she whispered softly as she pressed her forehead against his. A series of soft moans escaped her lips as she rode him in the tub. With each roll of her hips, the water splashed and waved around them, sloshing over the side of the tub as she held onto his shoulders.

"Natalia.. you were made for me…" He crushed his lips to hers as she pressed down to meet his every upward thrust. The pleasure was almost too much as the tidal wave of rapture hit them both simultaneously. They stared into each other's eyes as they both attempted to catch their breath, his hands firmly planted along her hips. "You're a goddess… you know that… I can never get enough of you… My little spider, I love you so much."

Loki sat along the rocks that jetted out into the sea as he taught his little boy who was standing at his side the fine art of skipping stones. Thomas jumped up and down with glee as he watched his rock skid across the water before sinking beneath the dark blue liquid. "Well done, little prince, well done," the young god beamed as his dark green eyes glanced toward his wife who was walking along the shoreline toward them. Life couldn't get more perfect, he mused, Valhalla was already his.


End file.
